#3168 The Valley Persian Style S1E03: Trunk No Show

0:20Hello and welcome to Watch What Crap It's a podcast for all the crap we love to talk about on ye old Bluffs. I'm Ronnie. That's Ben over there. Hello, Ben. Hello. Hello, hello, hello. How are you? How are you? How are you? Sup, brah. Sup, broski. We just talked about the traders for our bonus episodes, so go check that out over on Patreon for episodes four and five. Fun show, fun show. Got us pretty riled up, as usual. Yeah, that was very riled. Yes, that's our bonus episodes on Patreon. Patreon is also where you get our ad-free episodes and our video episodes. You can see us right now looking very handsome.

1:03So do that. Also, February 27th, guess what it is? It's the Golden Crappy Awards, the biggest award show in the business, people. Come to Los Angeles and see us at the Fonda Theater Friday, February 27th. Get your tickets at watchwhatcrappins.com, won't ya? We are also getting nominations together. You guys help us put this show together. We have a bunch of stuff on Instagram happening in the next week or so where you're going to give your nominees for best show, best fill-in, best et cetera, et cetera, best et cetera. And we are going to pull those all together for nominees. So be over on our Instagram at watch what happens, people.

1:46Yeah, it's going to be great. It's going to be great. It's going to be so great. I'm excited. Yeah, I'm excited too. It's a good couple months for us. This is like our pre-pro. It's like our pre-production. It's super fun. Good to talk about the year in Bravo again, write music, get all sorts of stuff together. I started to already assemble some of the things that people on Reddit had pulled together, had suggested. And so I was just loading them into good old Google Sheet. So many funny things. I feel like I have a pretty good memory, but there are just so many things that happened over the course of the calendar year on Bravo that we just have a lot to choose from.

2:26It'll be a good one. Good one this year. Yes. So today is the Valley Persian style. They should have called it the Valley. That's a person. Season one, episode three, Bartender Blues. I was thinking a good name for it would have been called, would have been the Valley, Gigi is still exhausting style. That would have been a really good one, I think. Really would have gotten right to the core of this show. Yeah. You know, it's a town where people don't want to grow up, and I get it. It's kind of the theme of the regular Valley, you know, guys that don't want to grow up. And this one is Gigi, who doesn't want to grow up.

3:02But it's like, at some point, like, it's kind of cute. You know, like when you're younger, it's like, ha ha, I carry knives everywhere. I'm hilarious. I have anger issues. I'm going to stab you. I'm going to cut off your nuts. And then at some point, it's just like, you're a sad person. And if you didn't have a dad supporting you, you'd be under a bridge somewhere. Just get it together, lady. Why do we have to be subjugated to watching some stupid fight with Gigi and this guy, Dennis? Who is this guy? Does anyone care about this guy? There's no stakes attached to this fight. And yet we have to like spend an entire episode building up to it and then watching it and then be teased that next week this guy shows up again.

3:45I'm like, what? Why? Why? We don't care. Like this, this is, you're taking us back to like low point shahs instead of riding the highs of the, of this Valley premiere from last week. Well, you know, you've all, you, I think you're forgetting some of the history here and I don't know if you know it cause we haven't talked about it yet, but this guy, she was married to for five minutes or whatever. the friend that he ended up going out with was Paulina. Did you know that? What? It was Paulina? Yes. So he was dating Paulina. Paulina was the girl at their wedding. At least I think so. And didn't Gigi punch Paulina or something in a parking lot?

4:23I thought she said her friend was named Ty. Or was Ty the guy that she was getting revenge on by marrying this guy? Yeah. I think that I could be wrong because I'm wrong at least 60 % of the time. but I'm pretty sure if my gossip memory serves, I believe it was Paulina who ended up hooking up with this guy. And I think Gigi punched her somewhere and got in trouble. Either way, it's messy. Yes, but it's also in the past and it's not happening on the show. So like trying to have this moment with this guy coming on the show and being like, Oh my God, remember there was something messy that happened between us.

4:59And like, it's just not, it's just as, I don't know. I just, she just really, she, she just, she drains a lot of energy out of me i'm not gonna lie it's just as you start aging with people that you're watching on tv right because we're all in the same age group i feel like roughly yeah and you're we're all aging together and it's just 32 or so yeah yeah exactly watching gg pulling the same shit and you've got a kid and it's like more disturbing now because you've brought a kid into all of this and it's it's cringe you know i worry for your child there I said it. I know we're not supposed to mom shame, but you seem like not a great one.

5:36You seem like not one that I would pick for somebody. I feel like we're allowed to mom shame if we're podcasters. I don't think you're supposed to mom shame if you're on the same TV show. But I think as outside observers, you can mom shame here and there. Okay, great. I think here and there we can throw a little soup sawn of some mom shame here and there. A little sprinkle of mom shame? Just a little touch here and there. I love it. Thank you. Just a little touch. Thanks for the permission. I'll take it. Yeah. So here we go. The Valley. It's a very, I was going to say slow walk to divorce for all of the couples.

6:13It's a pretty brisk walk to divorce for all of these couples. Pretty brisk. Yeah. They're basically all on the deck of the Titanic. And the boat, the hull is coming out of the water. And we're just watching the tables slide into the ocean at this point. and they're still holding up the rails. No, just one of Osso's old records. There's no Kathy Bates, although I would like to see Vita taking Kathy Bates' place, just passing them all on the boat, going like, oh, so sad. So sad. Never learned the right lipstick. Never learned the right lipstick. It's going to end with Adam throwing a bowl of tabbouleh into the ocean.

6:51It's just a boat sinking into an ocean full of tabbouleh that Adam has made. congratulations on your one middle eastern dish adam enough okay if you're fucking bulgur wheat and shove it up your ass i've had it with you in your tabbouleh oh my god so we start we see things happening around town amir and natasha are boxing she does not look happy or interested in any of this gg is getting a tour of a house that is clearly outside of our price range and does not look like it fits the definition of downsizing. And of course she's like, I keep trying to downsize and I can't seem to downsize. I'm like, okay.

7:33We go over to Reza and Adam and guess what Adam's making? Tabouli. Gigantic, gigantic bowl of tabouli. My game is tabouli. It's the guacamole of Summer House. And Reza's dancing around and snapping his fingers and he's got under eye patches on. And so then we go to Skye and Bomshad. And Skye is still my favorite one. I love Skye. She's awful. She seems awful. And I love her. So she's putting flowers in a vase and she's always putting flowers in a vase. That's her thing. And Bomshad comes in and she's like, oh, is this sake? And he's like, it's champagne. And she goes, okay, well, do you want to put it away?

8:20or like okay I'll put it away maybe in the garage and she's like good maybe you do this in the garage good I just love that she doesn't hide her hatred for like her hobby is hating on her husband yeah it really is and you gotta have a hobby it keeps her off the streets I say good for you yeah her husband is the flower and her hobby is a vase full of hate water she's just gonna put but Drano. So she's like, I design one of a kind fine jewelry. I'm very good at it. I have to say I'll do that. I had some new pieces that I would love to showcase. And so we're seeing her jewelry and everything. And she's like, I like to be in control of everything because when I'm not around, everybody's lost.

9:05Like who puts flowers in vases? We don't even know. That could have been Saki that he brought home. It could have been, but I'm here. And so she's telling Vamsad, she's like, oh something I found out last night she has an OnlyFans page and we see shots of Gigi's OnlyFans which is her you know like topless but like covering her boobs with her hands on the couch or you know it's fairly innocent for an OnlyFans it's not enough sorry I think you gotta show some goods if you're doing OnlyFans you don't have to but I think it would be nice so Gigi Ben coming for Gigi's OnlyFans if you're paying money I mean I don't want to see what I can see on Instagram yeah it needs to be more yeah like an extended I don't know I don't know maybe there's more on there I don't know I haven't checked it out it's too expensive OnlyFans I tried it with the Vanderpump Rules guys and I learned my lesson oh I learned not even one boner for my $11 but you know I don't know like good for her for like trying to do something to make money I mean I guess that's work you know sex works work like I have no shame in that but not at all you know i don't think only fans is just as profitable as it used to be right i mean i feel like only fans when it came out people like oh yeah like i make a hundred thousand dollars a day do you still make that because it seems like everybody's on only fan i feel like my fucking 73 year old gardener is like don't forget my only fans you know the support would be appreciated i'm like oh my god what are you doing leaf blower porn everybody's on there yeah i mean look i think some Some people can do it for sure.

10:44They can definitely make their money, but it's, it's gotta be hard. It's gotta be hard, which is not, I'm not talking about OnlyFans. I'm saying like, that's, if you want to do well, it's gotta be hard. Yeah. It's more difficult for guys, you know, cause it's gonna be hard. Um, so, but it seems like sky isn't fully aware of what OnlyFans is. Maybe she thinks it's a fan page. So she's like, why is she the only one who has a, has a page? Why don't I have a page? Why don't I have a fan page? She's like, uh, OnlyFans. She's like, yeah, I think I should have one. He's like, look it up. He's like, look, it's popular with sex workers.

11:17She's like, oh, okay, never mind. So she's like, oh, so I guess OnlyFans, you go and sell yourself or your body or text people. It's kind of like, it's trashy. It's trashy. You can write that in Farsi. Thank you. So now they're talking about this party she's going to have. She's going to have a trunk show to show off her great, amazing ladybug and also killer spider jewelry. And she's like, did you call the bartender? And he did not. She needs a bartender. And he's like, what am I, your employee? No, you're a husband that said four days ago you were going to call a bartender. And then you did not call the bartender.

11:55So I know that this episode people are going to be like, this woman is so mean to her husband. She's an asshole. She's telling him off in front of people. Yeah, but he also didn't call the bartender. And he said he would four days ago. Like, how much does she have to put up with? Yeah, it's annoying because she's trying to throw an event that looks like classy and cool and elevated. And instead, bomb shots can be, you know, serving the drinks. So there are going to be five people in her backyard expecting a bartender. And it's going to be very difficult for one man to pour five glasses of champagne.

12:24She she has she should be as angry as she needs to be. I say this would have been a great time for Tommy to step in and make his grand introduction to the cast. Hi, I'm your bartender. What do you want to drink today? You want champagne? Okay, how about this? I got a mug that says Mets. Mets 1986 World Championships. You want to drink your champagne in there? Oh, come on! You want to try our special drink, fart in your face? All right, get over here. Yeah, I'm giving you this champagne because I fucking love MJ and it breaks my heart that she says these things about me because I just love her so hard.

12:57It's like, uh, can I just have my drink, please? Oh, sorry. Here you go, fart face. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crapins commercial.

13:09So we go over to MJ and Tommy's house And we see her office And it's terrifying It's messy As a Virgo My butthole clenched Not in a good way Wow They could really use the home edit They could rainbow organize all those posters There you go That was intentional That was an intentional home edit Call back to another episode earlier this week There he goes Ben loves his home edit. So it's horrifying. There's shit on every inch of her desk all over the floors. And she's like, what do I even do with this? Like, how am I supposed to get this stuff? If I don't even have a platform to put all the stuff on, how do I get organized?

13:51Tommy. You know, this means I'm gifted like Massey Desk, brilliant mind. Yeah, like Einstein. Einstein bagels, that is, you dumb nuts. You got a hole in your head just like a bagel. But you're not an everything bagel. What's the opposite of everything poppy? because nothing poppies into your brain ever, you stupid face. Love you, though. I love you so hard. She's like, you sound like my mom. And he's like, don't compare me to your mother, dude, because that lady's fucking nuts, all right? We were just going to go get something to eat, and it turns into a bloodbath. Like, we didn't even get a chance to order, all right?

14:21She's your mother, bro. You know, she's just very tough to talk to. She's very tough to talk to. Unlike me, unlike me, Tommy, who took a dump three minutes into the conversation. I just shit right there at the table. There was a line at the bathroom. They can clean it up. They got bust, boys. Come on. MJ's like, you know what's so funny is that just thinking about it right now, the opening credits of the show, you see everyone. And Tommy's big moment is they show him driving a car, like in the driver's seat. And it's so funny because that's his role in the show is that he drops her off and drives off and doesn't shoot with the cast.

14:54And now it's like memorialized in the opening credits. So he's like, well, she told me that you're very unhappy in your marriage. And, you know, I know my show of Cummings. okay one of the other things that gets me triggered for me is like the worst parts of you you get from her and she doesn't why she doesn't even see any of the warts i'm telling you she's got tons of warts everywhere not metaphorical physical warts everywhere that's right warts i can't deal with it anymore you think mr matt has that many warts he doesn't you know what every woman loves being compared to their mother in a fight that's what every woman loves tommy and you can't say that she's like vita i'm not saying that she's not but the whole point is that you're denigrating her like Vita.

15:31The whole point is that you're too much like Vita. That's the problem. Not that MJ... MJ is your punching bag, okay? You don't get to change it just because you had to deal with Vita for one lunch. And also you got Vita being very nice to you. She was trying to help you and tell you to get your shit together. She wasn't being mean to you. Yeah, so he says, I'm tired of being put in a position where I'm the one that needs to fix things. I'm the one that needs to get better. You know what? I have mid-smoots doing sure. I can be grumpy sometimes, sure. But like, I feel like I get sickled out a lot No one's looking at the other side of the street and saying, how are you acting?

16:03That's like not nothing when he's like, oh, I have mood swings. Sure, I can be grumpy. That's not like, oh, sometimes I don't bring in the newspaper. Sometimes I forget to pour my wife a cup of coffee. Mood swings and grumpiness, that's like a significant thing in someone. Well, especially with Tommy. I mean, Tommy in a good mood is an asshole. Like, when is Tommy not? Even at their wedding, he seemed overly aggressive. I was like, are you going to drown her? Like, they show clips of them being in love. I'm like, Tommy's about to drown her. You know, that's you in a good mood. So I can only imagine what it's like to deal with you not in a good mood.

16:36So she's like, well, honey, you know, like I want us to have a safe, calm space when one of us wants to talk. Because, you know, you just shoved stuff under the rug. And he's like, well, a lot of the times we don't communicate when we're in a fight. Because, you know, you take no accountability. So it's like, all right, cool. I don't speak to this person now. That's it. Yeah, but I just, I think that like, that just taught me like you, you really need to turn it down. Turn it down. Turn it down. She's like, I want to go back to where we were. You know? Shoving cake in our faces. Dry humping, but not really dry humping because we're in a pool in a resort somewhere.

17:12Taking his penis inside of me while my friend is taking a picture of us in a pool. The last thing I want to do right now is take two steps back or ten steps back. Well, don't worry about it, babe, because I'll drive you there. Okay, you want to go ten steps back? Get in the car. Okay, reverse. Get out. Bye. She's like, I really just want to go back to public anal with Tommy. God, I miss that. God, I miss it. So now we go to Bel Air to Selah's house. Who is this and why is she hanging out with nobody? Did they say who she is? I believe her full name is Selah Later because she is there and she cooks them some halibut in a broth and then she leaves.

17:48Is she someone's mom? She's Tannen's friend. Oh, no, I'm sorry. She's not Tannen's friend. She's Skye's friend because Skye's like, Selah is one of my best friends. She's all about nutrition. She's not a slut on OnlyFans. And, you know, girlfriends usually send each other pictures of shoes or dresses. But for us, it's about kitchen stuff like your skin, your hair, your body, your health. I'm like, please don't tell me the hair and the skin is part of the kitchen stuff. But, you know, I see what you're saying. So they're just friends. And you're talking about your hair, but you need to do your roots.

18:21I'm just saying. So but why are you going to your friend's house for her to feed you? But then she leaves. and it was so weird i thought she was gonna join this i thought she was gonna join the scene and then the three of them just stay there sitting at the kitchen island they're not even like welcomed into like the actual proper dining room they're just sitting there as if their host is in front of them chatting with them but she's the other woman's like uh i'm gonna go play mine sweeper upstairs just let me know when you're ready to leave the house yeah exactly so reza comes he's like what is this halibut this is so persian tannin shows up too and they're like Like, they're cutting vegetables.

18:56And I was like, what are we doing here? This beautiful modern house? Skye's client is cooking for us in Bel Air, not the Valley. Hello, we're trying to start a new franchise here. My intuition is just telling me, like, oh, my God. Skye wants to be Sila. Like, she wants her life. She wants her house. And she wants that money. But guess what she can't have? Adam's the bully. So, Sila feeds them. And she's like, basically, it's bok choy, halibut, mushrooms, really clean and healthy. Goodbye. I'll be in my closet reorganizing. I am just putting my house on Zillow. And if I can't get any buyers, I'll just burn it down.

19:33Okay, have a great day. So, I heard through the grapevine that you and Greg had a date night the other day, Tani. And she's like, yeah, I mean, I guess. Let me just have some bread for this. He's like, oh my God, that's like a shot. Like, give me a shot. Am I right? Like, to skinny people, bread is like having a shot. It's like crazy. Like, that's your buttery nipple, am I right? Yeah, well, I don't know what the buttery nipple is, but, like, Dana, it was good. It's a shot. It's a shot. No, I know. I'm just trying to block out the idea of, like, a buttery nipple that's made of bread, and it's my nipple.

20:08It's just too much. But we had a really deep conversation where I reminded him that he's, like, a piece of shit husband, and I don't like talking to him, and I have more sexual chemistry with a grandfather clock. And it was really great. And then I cried. And he brought up that he doesn't like it when I hang out with my girlfriends or go to dinners or have any sort of independence or make any of my own decisions. But he's totally fine to coast off my wealth and have my mom cook for him. And we had a really lovely time on our date night, our quote unquote date night. I like to call it fate night because I could see my fate, which is a divorce very soon.

20:39Yeah, but like how come like you're going out with your girlfriends, but he's not like taking you out like every night of the week. Like why wouldn't you take your wife out like every night of the week? I mean come on and she's like yeah, but like never like there's no effort on his side Oh my god, let me ask you a question. I learned on Orange County who fills up your tank And does it filled up with tabbouleh because Adam does such a good job on that she's like um my dogs Oh my god The fact that Greg isn't even trying to spend every moment he can with Tannen is so strange to me I mean, I don't want to see other people I want to hang out with my husband and if the spark goes away or we're not cool or whatever I don't know if that I would stay because honestly it would be kind of cool if I could have something other than Tabuli for once I like that Reza's acting like the emotionally mature one and he's like the second it's boring I'm fucking out of there so not really sure what this chick's doing and also he's like oh the minute the spark goes away then why do you have to beg your man to touch you like literally even give you a hug yeah it's like level one touching like that's sad yeah so she tells the story about how they went to boulevard steak and he got a number from some girl and she's texting him at 2 a.m he tells the whole story and or she tells the whole story and he's like oh my god are you like worried that first it's like text messages at 2 a.m and then it's like peeling mint and then it's like adding lemon and then it's chopping tomatoes and onions and then adding like bulger weed inside until it becomes something unmanageable oh sorry i forgot that's the 2 p.m phone call when adam's friends want to bully yeah i'm sorry that that that text comes at to bully am that's a person so this guy's like i don't think it's right it's very disrespectful to your wife if bombshell had another girl's number it would have been a big problem big i don't accept it and i don't like it so tannon's like well greg is like my best friend you know because you know like when best friends you know like you hate them and you don't want to ever see them and you just kind of are like why am i stuck looking at this man with his man bun in the back like that kind of best friend right and i love him to death lol that was sarcasm everyone i may get lost in the bok choy and um as far as like romance and taking care of me as a wife like those are things just like not his strength and i just i don't think he thinks that there's a problem that is so fucking scary because there is a big problem here big huge so um now we cut to greg and tannon this house who owns it what are we even doing here why are we here so now we go to greg and tannon greg has gotten tannon a gift uh and he's like i hope you like it because you remember when we had date night and you said I don't take care of you I made you cry and I felt really bad about that and I was worried that your mom would stop cooking for us so here's the gift and we go outside and here comes a pink Porsche with a bow on it I thought she made all the money so did you just go buy her a pink Porsche with her own money are you pulling like a Vicky where Vicky got her daughter a car and she's like okay have fun making all the payments for this car I picked out for you and you had no choice in bye but also it's a porsche tie um porsche um take hand take hand uh it's a 2021 model i that was really that's nice that's a nice um a 2021 how do you know that does it say on the car i don't know it just says it on uh in our notes our note taker oh it says oh it said on the screen like oh it's a i guess so i didn't know it's but shelby shelby saw so she said 20 or maybe Shelby's just launching some sort of hate campaign and like we as like gullible readers of our own notes are like and on top of that it's fueled by blood wow but it's still 200 it's still 213 grand I mean jeez yikes and he's like but look babe I got it because it matches the color of her skincare line right oh yeah so romantic let me tell you a man who's not doing anything wrong while he's getting texts at 2 in the morning you know what they do they buy them their wives very expensive gifts.

25:00Yeah. Doesn't seem guilty at all, buddy. Yeah. Doesn't address literally any of the issues that she brought to you. It's just you got her a car. And then what I was surprised, that was then Sky came over and took the car and rubbed it on her dog. And she's like, Sky, stop doing that with my brand. So Tannen tells us the gift is very sweet. And obviously the effort and the work is even more important. But yeah, step in the right direction. Yeah. Yeah. She doesn't care. She's like, whatever. Thanks for the used Porsche loser. So then we go to Reza and Adam and Reza has his gloves on and he's putting nuts and dried fruit into like little bowls and jars and stuff.

25:38And he's like, what do you think like Americans would feel about receiving this in a bag with their company name on it? We're going to call it the pantry list. It's like, why do Persians get all of this amazing stuff? But like white people don't get it. Like, let's sell it to stupid white people. If you go to a Persian person's house, there'll be like on the table, nuts and dried fruits. And like, so my husband's like, we need to take this delicious Persian shit and peddle it to the masses. So we have this great idea. We're going to take dried fruit and nuts and everything and put it in bags and sell it.

26:15I was like, I mean, it's not the worst of the things that we've seen on these shows. Not the worst. But he's calling it the pantry list, which I feel like we'll just give it a Persian name. lean into it why not yeah let's call it that's so persian that's so persian nuts um but you know where else they sell like nuts in small packages it's a store um support that i go there and they have that there we used to have this in in my lebanese family this was very traditional like you go to you go to sit these house and there's you know but it was always kind of weird stuff i would eat the nuts but it's like all these different dried prunes and dried apricots and all that stuff but then there's like really hard candies like almonds but they've got that super hard shellac on them you know the color yeah the color can there was a lot of stuff that i i grew to believe was only put on the table because you could just put it in a ziploc later and just serve it for 20 years because nobody ever ate it is i wonder you know uh if you go to like a persian market or a middle eastern market if there's something like this that exists like i i want honestly there should just be like with those crudités trays you know you get the big circle that has like the broccoli in one corner and the tomatoes and the cauliflower and the dip in the middle that's what I feel like Reza should be doing like have a section for the nuts a section for the dry fruits dates over here this over here and a little something but like maybe like kind of a charcuterie like a person charcuterie type thing I wonder if that's already something that's available look I'm rooting for him because of the whole like oh my god that's like so Reza haircare like golden reza hair care remember that was his thing before um so yeah i mean this is edible like i couldn't eat that hair care so but this is also such an adam thing he's like why don't we take a few small nuts and fruits and put them in a smaller bag and then sell them as a small bag of things so uh but then he's like um hey um oh i'm sorry adam is like um reza do you have time to do a check-in?" He's like, yeah, okay, well, let's start it.

28:21So they sit, it's like a very therapy moment. Daily check-in time. Daily check-in. So Russ is like, what can I do today or tomorrow to make your day a little bit better? He's like, um, maybe a shoulder rub. Okay, because like, you know, I work really hard putting like almonds in little baggies. Um, what can I help you with anything um yeah so i could use like a little more physical touch like caressing and kissing just like out of the blue for a reason and then adam like hand jobs maybe you could massage my elbow skin it's called a weenus i'll settle for a weenus and adam is just staring at him like really uncomfortably and he's like as if he didn't just ask reza for a shoulder rub and here reza's just like can you give me a hug with a kiss which is a significantly lower lift than a shoulder rub You could braid my back hair.

29:15Would that make you feel good? He's like, mmm. He's just looking like crass. And he goes, what does uh-huh mean, Adam? And he's like, okay, well, my love, tomorrow I'm going to give you all of the caresses and squeeze downs that you're requesting and that you will feel and I'll make you feel more whole. Okay? So Adam tells us, my household growing up was much colder and it was not very affectionate. And anytime anyone would show affection, my father would be like, oh, I'm not into that touchy-feely shit. which is why I've decided to maintain the pattern. Yeah. I would like more. Yeah. I want to, I want to fuck my partner.

29:52Like my parents fucked. Yeah. So it was like, I just want some more affection. He's like, um, he wants me to be like Patrick Swayze and he'll be Demi Moore in ghosts. Yeah. But like, I don't want you to die. I just want to make some pottery. Cause Tommy broke all of mine. Yeah. That was called ghost. That was where one of the people was dead. Adam. fucking weirdo. Adam, just like give the man a hug, please. Just hug him. Touch him. Oh my God, my neighbor just started his car. I swear to God, I'm going to murder this fucking guy. He drives a Porsche and every time he turns on this car, he shakes the walls in the house.

30:31Like...

30:35And then he just sits there and guns it for five minutes before he leaves. Like, God forbid, your Porsche doesn't get a little fucking gas in it for five minutes before you leave. You douche. Just point him to the nearest cliff. Let him go over it. Douche. So anyway, yeah. I think, I feel like this storyline. I'm sorry about your teeny tiny little wiener. Commercials. Here comes one right now.

31:06Meanwhile, it's Tannen in her new Porsche. And you're like yelling at her. She's like, it matches my moisturizer. which no one cares about shut up sky anyway adam i mean i feel like the adam thing has been going on for a while like he's not even asking for a blowjob unless it's like a reading between the lines thing but i'm just like adam hug your man it's really not hard just hug it please um but also um thank you adam for giving us the image of you doing the ghost pottery scene with reza i really did not need that going into the weekend yeah no one needs that but i will say you know for these two they do seem like a cute little couple like they've calmed down into like this cute little couple one makes tabbouleh all the time the other one's like you want me to bang your nuts and like coming up with little businesses together so maybe this is just for the show where they're like oh it's the valley and now we have to talk about our relationship all the time I thought you were going to say, no, they're in this cute little groove.

32:10One makes tabooly all the time. The other is massively toxic and undermines everyone around him. And it's just nice. That's cute. That's cute. This only couple I'll ever be in. You know, I need a sweet one and I'll be toxic. You know, I think that's cute. Once a toxic person finds his mate, you're not toxic. I feel like I'm toxic. I'm passive aggressive. So the producers are like, so what do you have to say to people who think you're not? Oh, we're talking to RJ, Reza Jackson. They all call him RJ. The producer's like, hey, RJ, what do you say to people who think that you're not masculine? He goes, yeah, that's called toxic masculinity.

32:52Masculinity. Toxic masculinity. Masculinity. Masculinity. Fuck, I can't even say it anymore, bro. You can't say toxic masculinity, which is pretty funny. so um gg uh you know he's getting they're all getting their nails done and gg's like i'm doing bread for only fans i'm doing only fans now and he's like oh wow okay so are we gonna make money off your feet too and he's like no but like i want to create content is that something we're doing i mean something about you me being single the bunch of couples like we should make content about that it's gonna go viral like single people around people who aren't single it's gonna go crazy can't wait can't wait it'll be the second coming of the red balloon show so gg is like uh she's like well i'm old and i've been and i've been staying single for so long you know it's like no you're not you're perfect i love milfs she's like oh are you an option for me it's like i actually met golnessa two years ago like a while back where she'd asked me to be on her podcast at the time and like that's an interest i mean like conessa's hot a little crazy but hot kind of annoying and exhausting to talk to and listen to but hot yeah so they like flirt like that's gonna happen and then um they talk about who they're banging and she's like guys dennis reached out to me like what just yeah i was whispering he was wishing me happy mother's day so i went off on him because that's what you do when people wish you happy mother's day am i right like i can't take any more of these fucking men like what are they wishing me happy mother's day like fuck off i needed a load to talk to your toddler unlike some of us in greece drunk pill popper alcoholic yeah so she went off on him about this about this and she's like i haven't spoken to him since a week after we got married you know he's like that sentence just sounds wrong yeah because everything after that was everything i was seeing in the press like all the fucking bullshit yeah so she says that she dated dennis four months and then broke up with him and um for the last 13 years they've just been friends and then they were in business together they looked out for each other we would go on family vacations together and when then we went on a trip to vegas in 24 and we got married we see a we'd see a cell phone video of this and he's just like thumbs upping the camera like yes look what i won look what i won yep and then i played i played a slot machine and i got three death cards i want gg i want fucking gg so then natasha's like well and so then gg said then a week after he's like he's with my friend she's like are they still together she's like no they broke up you know and so rj's like is that a thing getting married and then putting a ring on and he's like why don't you just take it easy and like not get married she just ignores him so she's like yeah i'm gonna see him soon and like i know he's like let's just talk in person like let's just get past this and he goes and so they're like are you still interested and she's like no i mean no but like we're we're literally married for a week so so she tells us that maybe she needs to stop getting married but relationships aren't for her you know and she just wants people to like come to her when she needs them and then go away when she doesn't need them and you know be more like her dad yeah she's um i don't find i don't i just i'm like it's sad she's just a sad person so she says hey i was in a relationship with ty do you guys remember ty remember and i found out some information on him on ty and that like really made me hurt and i knew he was like close with dennis as a friend so i thought you know what this is a great way of getting payback on ties so I always knew that Dennis had that thing for me always so that's why so she got married just to make this guy tie upset which is almost like the story that you hear in like a musical or something like well I'm gonna date so-and-so just to get revenge on so-and-so because that's the person I really love yeah it's sad and it's uh it's hard to watch because she thinks it's so amusing you know it's like yeah that makes me cool you know it's like when she pulls out like a full joint in a minute in a backyard at a family's house it's like yeah i'm like really cool you're sad yes you're a sad fucking person man yeah so and he's kind of sad listening to it he's just like i thought this was going to be a scene of us flirting and now it's just kind of gross you know so then um she's like you know no matter what happened like you shouldn't hook up with my friend a week after we're married but the whole situation is so stupid you can't really take sides but they're trying to and she's like well you know like it's good that rj's reminding me of my wrongdoings in this too but like you know i mean maybe it makes me not want to like cut his dick off and slap him with it maybe i'll just cut his dick off and leave it at that and they're like oh my god gg is growing yeah so now we go to sky's house because she's gonna set up she's setting up for the trunk party and everything and people are coming over and setting things up.

38:04And Miley comes out. Miley's, I think, their daughter. She's so cute. And she comes over to see if she can have a bracelet. She's like, no, no bracelet for you. Bracelets lead to OnlyFans. Go inside. So this guy talks about how she lived in Iran for the first 20 years of her life, and she had an amazing life, and everyone was always providing the best. And then she came to America, and she started working at a restaurant and providing for herself, and she could just be who she wanted to be. and then she went into jewelry and all this fun stuff. So Baumstadt's like, oh no, the bartender's not answering.

38:38Oh no, okay, well, bad news. I don't think we have a bartender. I'm going to be the bartender. And she goes, oh good, so we can just sweep that under the rug too. Have fun. Let's just sweep it under the rug. Yeah, so Adam and Reza are driving to the party and Adam's asking Reza if he's ever seen the jewelry and he's like, yeah, I have seen her jewelry. I actually saw some rings when I was having lunch and found out that Greg gets numbers from other women.

39:06My subtle, my subtle transition. He's like, I was like, what? Like everything you're telling me sounds like one red flag after the other. Getting calls at 2 a.m. only involve a few things. Okay. When you're Persian, dick, hoo-ha, drugs, or money. Okay. Well, why are we throwing three out of four of those things are great. Yeah. What the hell? It's kind of alarming, says Adam. I know, it's crazy, those phone numbers. No, it's alarming how fast we're driving. This is scary. We're only going 30 miles per hour. I know, but statistically, most accidents happen below 25 miles per hour. Could you slow down a please, Reza?

39:49Honey, we just put a sticker on the back of our car that says Tabooli on board. Slow down.

39:58so then so people start arriving do we get to go to the grove because I already bought tickets to go see a tabooly and me screening of a movie

40:13you park your Tupperware outside so Bomshod sees it and he goes tabooly is not a Persian dish but if he likes to make it good for him I was wondering about that I think you said that last week right yeah because our food is similar but I didn't know it was that so I didn't know that we all had tabouli I know that Greek and Lebanese people fight over food a lot we're like no tabouli is ours no it's ours how dare you grape leaves are ours but I didn't know we had that with Persians but I guess we don't Adam just Adam saw something on TV and went with it he's like well it's not European so I think it will work.

40:54So Tannen, although I guess if Greece is claiming tabbouleh, I guess it could be European. Tannen is saying hi to Adam. She's like, oh, I feel like I haven't seen you in a while. Hell, you know it is in the tabbouleh mines. Reza and I were actually talking about you on the way in. She's like, oh boy. Yeah, he was saying that sometimes you drive over 35 miles per hour. And I just want to remind you, it's really dangerous to do that, especially if you've got tabbouleh in the front seat. So just really think about it. Yeah, Adam, Reza and I were just talking about you, Tannen, and Reza was saying he wishes that you would touch him more.

41:26Could you just touch him, please, for me? Okay, everyone, we're going to play tag, and I just want to know that everyone can be it except for Reza, so we just all have to touch Reza, and that counts as me touching him. Okay, thanks. she's like god you really can't tell a secret in this group you know look um okay like greg yes greg has some questionable behavior there was a phone call but you know the point was i was trying to bring up a communication issue and greg comes in he's like hey hey what are we talking about me and she's like yeah we're talking and adam's like yeah we're talking about communication and typically if you really want to broaden it up um but by the way adam like brings this up of a tan and they're like at the screen door and she's like about to go outside he's like by the way i hear that you and greg are having communication issues you want to talk about it here in a very public place it's like what are you doing right here like there's no chill on this show it's like so have you ever seen her jewelry yes i saw it when we were talking about greg possibly cheating on his wife like come on guys i know it's been a while but let's like layer stuff in here a lot of tap dancing so uh greg's like yeah i mean we have our day some days are great some days are not you know the great days are when she's out of town and i get a number from a hot 22 year old at the club and the days that aren't great are when i'm back home and i can't text back the 22 year old so you know take it believe me i wasn't trying to do anything come on he's like well i mean you don't have a fake number you can like give people he's like oh that's good that's good but if i had a fake number how would i get the text like you don't make any sense think things through at him.

43:03Yeah, think about it. Think about it. So now we go to Skye and she's like, okay, this is a little killer spider ring. This ring, if you put it on, hopefully your husband will put it on one day and it will kill him in his sleep. Okay, little tiny poison violence, I'm drunk. And then MJ shows up. Vita's already there, so she's saying hi and everything. And then Amir and Natasha arrive. And then Greg tells RJ, like, oh, I shaved my chest for you, man. Oh, and they're like, aha, laughing, etc. And Bombshot is like behind the bar just trying to serve drinks. He's like sweating and unhappy. He doesn't even know how to open up a bottle of wine.

43:39Yeah. Yeah. And Sky just yells to the whole party. Oh, he called the bartender last night at 930, everybody. And he's like, the point is that I did it. Isn't it the effort that counts? No, it's the lack of effort that counts. That's the point, sir. Oh, the point, the point. Listen to the point. You're driving me nuts with the point. That is the point, though. This is your wife's event for her career. And you're saving the responsibilities for the last second when things can fall through. And so then Gigi's like, I thought this was supposed to be an event for 80 people. Where are the 80 people?

44:17Did she mean eight people? That's a burn. See, I divided it by ten, and you just wind up with eight. If you think about it, it's really funny. Yeah, I really want 80 men that were supposed to be here for 80 people. Like, what? Are there 80 penises going to be here? Like, I can't deal with you motherfuckers. I'm so stressed right now. I'm really stressed. So then we see MJ standing with RJ. And Reza's like, oh, my God, why are your nipples out? He's like, oh, you know. And MJ's like, no, it looks good. It looks good. And Vida's like, no, button up, button up. It looks stupid. You look like trash.

44:54Maybe if you buttoned up, your chest wouldn't be showing. and MJ's like no don't listen to them we want your chest okay Tommy is at home give me some chest give me some chest and he's like oh my god I buttoned it one button now I look like Amir like I've got three kids and they all start laughing so Gigi's like fanning herself and talking about makeup with Natasha and she's like this is boring I'm gonna smoke I'm gonna like smoke I can't even with you fuckers so she pulls out like a blunt you know it's not really a blunt It's just a joint. But she pulls it out and slides it up in this backyard.

45:29Like, who does that? I get that it's legal, but that's still tacky as fuck. Come on, man. It is really tacky. I mean, it's just the kids are there. And Skye is, like, not happy. She's like, who does that without asking? And so she's like, she's smoking like she owns the place. Like, I get it. Get your shit together. So she basically is like, hey, if you see the kids, can you make sure they don't come outside? Because I don't want them to see Gigi doing drugs and OnlyFans.

45:57so everybody smells it and they're like yeah it's not cool gg so she doesn't care and she's like where's this thing a man at and rj is like me me and she just laughs so then um we go to adam talking about how he wants to go boxing with amir i'll bet you do and they talk a little bit about that and amir talks about how their kids like he wanted a large family and she's like no more than three, please. They just gang up on you. And he's like, well, the accidents are the best ones, right? And she goes, oh, God, just fucking kill me. And RJ is talking to MJ and he's like, he's like, hey, where's Tommy, by the way?

46:35He's like, um, well, he'll come pick me up. So if you want to see him, you can line up at the window and you can see the top part of his head as he pulls into the driveway. So that's really exciting for everyone, I think. So she's like, yeah, Tommy's absence is starting to wear on me, but I know it's complicated because Tommy and Reza haven't seen each other in five years. So you want to roll some clips of Tommy coming to Reza's house and destroying plants and trying to murder him? I love those clips. I love every time they show those clips. It's like, God damn it! I love you! Fuck you, Ficus!

47:13Fuck you, Ficus! I think Tommy, it's like... Reza's toxic. We know this. And we agree. Reza tried to get you to go to jail. He tried to actually ruin your life. It's not good that you threw his pots around. That was really, really bad. That was not acceptable at all. And I also understand that from Tommy's perspective, the punishment did not fit the crime. Reza was going to have Tommy have a felony on his record, which is life-altering. And so I understand why Tommy hates Reza. I think there's also a world where you can go to the party and just not talk to Reza at all and just ignore him. No. Not, no.

47:54You think Reza's gonna do that? He'll be like, well, Tommy, would you like to have a conversation? Start out like that and then be like, you did it. It's your fault, you fucking assolter. Well, if he's being resolute enough to not go, he can be resolute enough to not talk to Reza. Yeah. Well, that's true. But that's just not how it works on these shows. You know, Reza would be all up in his business. He doesn't want to punch Reza and go to jail, which I think is what he thinks will happen. I think it's like, fuck these people. You said my wife had 10 abortions. You attacked her all season. You went for her.

48:25You made her cry every single day. I stood up for her and then I was going to have to go to jail. I'm not hanging out with these toxic people. I think it's like the Todd from Salt Lake City thing where he's like, okay, you come home crying every time you hang out with these people. You talk about how toxic they are and how they're ruining your life and yet you still want to keep going back there while it's ruining our whole relationship. And like at some point, This is disrespectful to our relationship, you even going around there. So fuck off. Well, I understand why he's doing what he's doing.

48:54It's for all those things. Maybe in a weird way, he's thinking, this way you can shoot your show without it being awkward. Because if I'm there, it's going to be awkward, and it's going to be tense every single time. And whatever. But it's also clear that MJ wants him to be there. So it's one of those tough things in a relationship. So anyway. Yeah, and like Salt Lake City, this is their career. so it's not just saying like i won't be around these people it's also saying like i'm not gonna shoot like i'm gonna make it harder for you to shoot a show that is your career and our family's income so like you know you gotta you gotta bend a little yeah um i don't even know what tommy does for a living do we know i don't know does he do anything does tommy have a job something at some point but i don't know what he does now other than he did the podcast with mj but yeah i don't know But either way, they're all like, why is Tommy not here?

49:45Bring Tommy. And MJ is like, not want to talk about this. He's a marketing entrepreneur and CEO of For Our Son Agency, helping small businesses with branding. He's also involved in podcasting with MJ and runs the Fight Club nonprofit, but it's F-E-I-G-H-T, like his name. Nonprofit for literacy, focusing on being a dad to his son, Shams, and navigating life on the valley. There you go. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know why but when I think About like needing to reach out to like A brand consultant I don't know why I don't think of Tommy I don't know why that's not Alright let's talk about marketing here we go Thoughts nothing but thoughts

50:26So Have I suggested that we go with a Campaign Senate around boobs So Gigi tells us I think that Maris is afraid of being Alone and she's also very insecure And so like maybe she's thinking of like how she's gonna to find another guy to love her but i'll tell you something that girl has been getting the work done and she like gestures to like the full body and she's like anytime one person is in a marriage starts to look good it's a divorce coming which is not wrong and mj is saying yeah i want to like focus on my life and my career but like i just i'm busy and like i don't have time to worry about if my marriage is working out or not so whatever and she's like um well i mean i don't want you to be becomes suppressed and numb to a situation because he's this way, you're this way, and then that's it, you know?

51:12Yeah, Gigi, but you're also the lady who's, like, divorced for five minutes, married for five minutes at a time. I don't think anyone's asking for Gigi advice. Yeah, seriously, relationship expert. But basically, Gigi's like, you're mirroring him, right? But does he ever mirror you? I'm just like, I don't know. Is this improv class? Can we not? I know. What is that supposed to mean? So Adam is still nosing into Greg and Tannen's business and being like, hey, maybe you guys should go on a date. You guys should go on more dates. And Greg is like, well, we go on less than we should. And Tannen says, oh, that's such a sad answer.

51:50I mean, there's like a chart about signs, and it says like percentages of which ones would work out. And Bombshot and Sky are 97%. You guys are perfect. He's like, have you not seen her attacking me all day about this bartender? I don't know. It doesn't seem like it. You know, we come to a point where we don't really reach a resolution, right? And Adam goes, in a separate bed. Like, Adam, you're not even giving Rez a hug. Please don't be judgy about the beds. So Bombshaw's like, yeah, she's staying away from me. And like, that's very new. I enjoy waking up in the morning and seeing her face and burping in it and then farting and then scratching my balls and deciding to go back to sleep when she can't get the extra two hours of sleep she was hoping for.

52:29God, I love that. waking up next to her and seeing one of my back hairs in her teeth for no reason that's romance right there and that's what we're missing right now and Tani is like well I have a perspective because I sleep in separate beds too and I'm happier and he's like well I don't give a shit you sleep better and she goes well fuck you then he goes yeah well fuck me then right I don't give a shit and they're kind of getting too serious Gigi sees them and she's like what the fuck's going on out there and she goes well what let me say something about men i mean men are more like let me brush it under the rug and that bitch i deal with sky she when i have an issue i go and i deal with her so go and deal with her and tannon's like sky is my best friend but i definitely think that she's stubborn and she kind of like blocks off if there's an issue rather than talking about it and i'm like the opposite okay so then bombshell's like well talking about communication talking this and that whatever so sky's like okay well the talking really doesn't get anywhere because like i have in i have an event and then we don't have a bartender and he's like oh whoa no dude not a problem like don't worry about it i'll take care of it and then he left okay so whatever he's like but the bartender didn't show up and it's like oh like a lot of things don't show up but i guess that's fine and he's like what do you mean a lot of things here here's the other things that's another full-on fighting in front of everybody and uh she's like just leave me out of this, guys.

53:54Leave me out of it. I don't want to talk about it anymore. It's rude and disrespectful to come to my house and talk to me or my marriage. This is solo. Don't be a loser. So she goes off. And I kind of agree with her. I mean, you are berating your husband in front of everybody. Like, whether or not he deserves it. So you can't berate your husband and then expect people to not say something. Yeah. So now we go around the valley to see what people are up to. We go to MJ and Tommy's house and they have like a Dave and Buster style little basketball kind of arcade game thing and Vita's there just shooting baskets.

54:32She's like, oh, I was very, very athletic. I was ping pong champion. Very athletic. I love that. I started laughing so hard. She's like shooting baskets. She goes, I was ping pong champion. And she goes, yeah, yeah, mom, we know. We're very proud of you. Oh, no, basketball too. Look at that. I got another one. So, Gigi, we go to Tannen's house and Gigi comes over and Tannen, there's guacamole and Tannen saying how anyone coming over, I always make sure people are fed. That's just part of the culture. I think, you know, new ship means new shit. John means feeding your soul in a way. So that's, that's how we show love.

55:07We, we make sure people are fed. I was like, yes, like we're aware. Yes. yes so we're aware every scene on the show has to start with you know what persians do we feed each other okay let's go to a pool party do you know what persians do at a pool party well they swim but not until they feed each other that's for sure i mean i think it's great but like at a certain point when we when we see that like your friends come over and there's like a spread of food out i get it you're feeding your friends like i don't need it to be spelled out for me. It's like, no, we do. We have guacamole fights. Yeah.

55:45Like other cultures never feed their friends. That's what cracks me up on the show. They're like, Persians like eating. Oh, really? Most of us invite our friends over and starve them. We just like to watch them starve to death. My favorite is when any, like any culture does this. And this happens in all these shows and it comes from a good place, but it's always so funny. Like, you know what? Our culture is all about food. We just love eating. As opposed to those crazy cultures that just hate eating. I mean, it is true, though, because it is true in a way because my Lebanese family was like that.

56:18It's like you go over, there's food all the time, constantly, constantly. But then my mom, it's like, invite your friends over after school. Oh, okay, what are we having? Nothing. What would you eat? You're fat. You don't need to eat. And definitely certain cultures are much more into abundance than others. that's for sure but like southern moms are like starve starve fatty but thank god you know i feel like it'd be the opposite i feel like southern moms would be like southern moms with chubby kids oh okay let me rephrase it yeah got it but like it is it is like very funny to me when people are like my culture is all about food it's like pretty sure food is a as a major staple in every culture but that being said i'm not trying to make tannin you know i'm not trying to be like well she's full of shit you know like whatever it's just a funny thing that every culture takes pride in like a certain basic thing as if like they're the only culture that does it yeah like jersey they shoot in a restaurant in jersey and they're like this is what italians do we eat yeah we all go to dinner we all do it yeah if we're lucky enough to do it we do it so gg and tannin are talking about dennis who nobody fucking cares about stupid relationship and tannin's trying to get to the bottom of like do you care like why are you meeting with him i mean he hurt you right like she was betrayed by him and her best friend and she just portrays it like i don't know like maybe her walls are up or maybe she's trying to be strong she doesn't care she needs something to shoot is what's happening so then we hear this whole story about this loser again and then we go over to bomb shods and he's in his is he in his yeah he's in his office this guy comes in and She's like, oh, this is clean to you?

57:57Nice, because there's a stack of folders. He's like, oh, I've just cleaned up. She's like, oh, really? This is clean to you? Okay, I see. Yeah, we're bookending this episode with messy desks. First MJ and now bombshot. So Sky's like, okay, so messy pants. Actually, we didn't get to talk about it on Saturday, but as much as I'm pissed off at everyone else, I'm pissed off at you too. Because at some point I turned around that everybody's so busy talking to each other about our problems, and you were actually engaging with them instead of serving champagne. I mean, how could you do that? And he's like, no, but I had no choice but to engage with them, my dear.

58:32I mean, I stood up for both of us when I said, my wife won't even sleep in the same bed as me. I like when he goes, I mean, I stood up for the both of us. And she goes, good, kind of. Mostly. Either way. So he's mad that she berated him in front of everybody and she's mad that he didn't get the bartender and then he talks shit about their relationship to everybody when it's none of their business. And I think they both have a point. But also, Sky, you're on the Valley and the whole point of the show is for you guys to talk about your relationships with each other. So you've got a lot to get used to.

59:08Yeah. And she basically is like, she's like, you know what? I asked you to do something and you couldn't deliver. And then I pointed out and you didn't like it. And she goes, you know what? I'm a big fucking failure. And she's like, whatever. And yes, you're right on that. that's on camera and i'll be using that clip every single time you do something wrong thank you very much and so she goes oh god whenever there's a problem you you end up losing your shit like yeah i'm a failure i failed i failed what the fuck is that i asked you to do something you couldn't deliver and i pointed out and you didn't like it because you know what i'm a big fucking failure she goes oh my god even though i call you out and you still do it yes i mean i find their horrible relationship fun.

59:49I think it's cute. So now we go to Dennis. Oh, sorry. Go ahead. I can't tell if they're headed for divorce or this is just their love language. It could go either way right now. I think there's like a slight edge towards divorce, but not as bad as Tana and Greg. They're done. Yeah. So we go to Dennis and Gigi's big scene in that restaurant with the weird tiles on the wall. I can't with this restaurant and these weird fucking tiles being in triangular like those shiny floor tiles that are now on the wall in weird triangular shapes it bothers me and just like reflecting off of his veneers it's just too much too much going on here oh my goodness so um dennis is like what no hug no kiss no nothing and she's like yeah you know i've been waiting for this moment for a long time and so is america crickets from america dennis like well here I am.

1:00:43I'm here in the tile restaurant. How about that? And she's doing this whole like, I am so mad at you. I could fucking lose it with you. Like you come in here. You don't bring me gold. I would have a sky rider over the sky saying, I'm sorry. I'd be giving you gifts. I'd be giving you jewels. Nothing. You come here with nothing. I'm so mad. Oh my God, Gigi. Nobody cares. No one cares. She's like, you were family. He's like, we still are. We still are. She's like, no, no. He's like, why are you so angry? She's like, well, should we start there? Is that a good place to start? It started when I was one years old, okay?

1:01:22And no one gave me, someone said the food was coming into the hangar, and the food did not come into the hangar, okay? That airplane never made it. He's like, no, no, no. Why are you angry about me? Not why are you angry in general? So I was born with a golden knife in my hand. And she's like, no, what are you talking about? But I love that you have to explain things to guys on the show. Like, they're all so stupid. She's like, okay, let me explain this to you. You marry me, we get divorced, and then one second later, you're dating my friend. And he's like, so? She's like, yeah, you can't do that.

1:01:54He's like, what'd I do? He's like, it's not like I cheated on you. You know, we got a divorce, and then I started dating your friend. What's the big deal? So she's telling us, there's a lot of hurt there. There's a lot of betrayal there. I had a fear of showing sadness. So that's usually when anger would show up. But I went up to her and I kind of just went into her face. And the producer goes like, but you kind of played a part. How does that factor into this? You also were playing games. She goes, no, it doesn't matter. Because what I did with Dennis, it doesn't factor into it. because Dennis didn't know at that time.

1:02:32It was part of a revenge scheme against Ty. So he thought it was a real marriage. He didn't know. He didn't know I was just using him. So it's not the same. He didn't know we were in an episode of Boring Liaisons.

1:02:48So she's like, you seem numb to everything that I'm saying. Like as if it's not a big deal to just go after somebody's friend. I mean, like go fuck yourself right now. Go fuck yourself right now so hard because if you're – you're such a fucking douchebag. If you're going to be – I've got to go outside. Like I'm so upset right now. Like her bad act. I just can't. Yeah, and he's like – and this whole thing is acting. And he's like, hold on a second. You're acting like I cheated on you or I left you and I didn't – you said like I didn't cheat on you or leave you for another girl. She's like, you knew very well when we started talking about the annulment.

1:03:26My response was, wow, are you already lining up a third marriage? You seem very eager to get this annulled because right there, my snarky comment was cracked. Yeah. And he's like, and you go around and you're talking shit to everybody like, oh, I never loved Dennis. I would never be with Dennis. I never married Dennis. So then why do you care? Like, why do you care for? He goes, why do you care for? So just for people keeping up, the marriage that Gigi didn't care about, she wanted Dennis to care about also. So just get out there. Yeah. And she's like, really? I'm going to go outside and I'm going to fucking punch something to get it.

1:04:03I'm going to fucking punch something. It's like you're in the valley. Everything already looks like it's punched. And then there's that too. And so she goes outside and she's like, what is this shit? She's crying. Dan's just sitting there and the rest of us are scratching our heads like, wait, this was the cliffhanger. This is what we're supposed to care about. Yeah. I wonder, will he drink his lychee martini? Let's find out next week. the valley persian style oh no well everybody that was it this ends a week of watch what crappin super fun week we had here with you guys love ya go get tickets for the golden crappies february 27th in hollywood you can get those tickets at watch what crappins.com and we will talk to you next time bye bye everyone watch what crappins would like to Thank its premium sponsors.

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