#3321 Ladies of London S4E08: A Weekend in the Country

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1:26Ben Mandelker: Well, hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today is Ronnie Karam. Hi, Ronnie. How's it going? Hi, what's up? Not much. It's Ladies of London Day. Thank God I desperately need this show. This weekend, whoa, Ronnie, you have a big weekend. And you're going on a evening cruise with Hannah.

1:55Ronnie Karam: Going on a city cruises cruise with Hannah Ferrier and Sheena from Vanderpump Rules and Zach from the Valley. Going to be their little Andy Cohen and ask them some questions and stuff. It's going to be really fun. If you want info, go to Hannah's Instagram. That's where you'll find links to it. It's Hannah Ferrier. Just look her up. Ferrier. Ferrier. Ferrier.

2:15Ben Mandelker: Are you going to be asking them questions about their time on the shows and things like that? Is that the plan?

2:21Ronnie Karam: Yeah. Just talk. Evening with reality stalls. You know how it goes. What do you think of me? What do you think of my show? What do you think of my hair? What do you think of my makeup? That sounds super fun. Yeah. That sounds super fun. Should be. I haven't written any questions yet, so I guess time will tell. Yeah. Anything you want to know? Um, give me some, I'll write them down right now.

2:50Ben Mandelker: I, I'm sure there were questions. I want to know how she knows book is doing. And, um, I want to know from Zach, what he thinks about this guy, Brandon, that, that Brittany is dating from Hannah. I want to know if she will ever come back to below deck. Those are my three questions.

3:11Ronnie Karam: Okay.

3:12Ben Mandelker: Done. Done. Um, everyone. So go get your tickets for that if you're in Southern California. Also, join us on Patreon, patreon.com slash watchercrappens for free newsletter and all that other good stuff. Add free listening, bonus episodes, video. You can watch us, Crappens on Demand. And on Monday, we have our Amazon Live. Come join us because we will be sharing our latest finds. And we get our Stacey Rush on when we go on that. And it's really, really fun. And we have crappy hour after that later in the evening. but today we have ladies of london this show is just so divine i i i am so delighted by the show i'm so amused even before there's any fighting you know there was a fight on this episode and it was like the last like five minutes of the show but the rest of it was just them bantering cracking jokes you know being snarky but like also this was truly insane this episode this the episode where we go to Emma's country estate and we've seen footage of it.

4:14Ben Mandelker: We've seen her, you know, putting mud on a rhinoceros. We've seen that she lives basically on a safari, but I just don't feel like we fully grasped how large this place is. And it's crazy that Emma lives here. Like this is her spot. And I was just watching it like, wow, this show is just doing something else right now compared to the shit that we see elsewhere in Bravo compared to like, you know going to like ruler's house in rhode island and then we have oh god or the rest of

4:45Ronnie Karam: the floor tiles on the wall in the valley you know yeah flies and bar rot and then you go here it's like wow i mean i will say about that this is like a government owned i mean i know it's not but it's in america it would be like living in you know the treasury department you know what i I mean, it's like the Pentagon, like I'm going to live in the Pentagon. It's like this big, massive building that people are always touring through and there's tour buses coming to it. And it just seems not like it doesn't seem comfortable. Like you're not walking around in your underwear, you know, eating cold slices of pizza while Real Housewives reruns are playing.

5:27Ronnie Karam: So I kind of felt bad for Emma. Is that weird? Like, I kind of felt like, oh, my God, this poor lady, like she's stuck like in her workplace. And they're like, OK, now make a safari event. Now go clean the rhinoceroses. Now do this. I'm like, well, what's the point of being rich? All she does is she walks around in a uniform and has to work. What the fuck is the point of marrying a rich guy? I'll stick to poor people.

5:49Ben Mandelker: Yeah, but like I just felt like this degree of wealth was something that I just feel like we haven't even seen on Bravo before. where we've, there've been some people on Bravo and they're just not, it's not coming to me where I'm like, wow, these are some wealthy ass people. I mean, Caroline Fleming was also extraordinarily wealthy, but it just was like, Emma's just living in a whole different world. And I just was really struck by it. This episode in a way where I was like, this is, this show is kind of taking me into a world. I was not expecting. I mean, it wasn't deep into that world. All we saw was like the public areas that anyone else could go to, but still, I just was like, wow, I love this show so much.

6:26Ben Mandelker: It just makes me so happy.

6:28Ronnie Karam: Yeah, they're rich, rich on the show. So, yeah, we see the packing scenes. Everyone's getting ready to go. Mark is speaking France to his housemate. And Mark is like, oh, my God, what do I even pack for this? I'm sure it's going to be something fucking terrible. So, let's see what it is. It ends up being tassels on boobs and a thong. Yes.

6:52Ben Mandelker: So, Emma, she's telling us, she's doing preparations at Long Leet. she's like at long later we have opened seven cottages on the estate which are beautiful and they're all historic houses and they've been restored lovingly and curated and dotted about the estate like someone uh can someone like wake up emma i know emma's just like resting her head

7:13Ronnie Karam: on her shoulder at all times she's like a doll that nobody she's like a marionette that no one's picked up yet she's like yes yes yes it's seven cottages it's lovely curated they're dotted about the estate some are in the safari some are in the forest it's very very sweet you know like staying in a cottage in the country you know playing country house for the weekend oh my god someone pick up the doll pick her up it's gonna break off it's like when a baby is born and they're too, they don't know how to hold their neck up yet. And you're always having to support the babies to support her head, support her head somebody.

7:53Ben Mandelker: She's always sort of flopped over, but like somehow she's the only one who could be so flopped over and so elegant at the same time. I just love her. I, you know, I'm not usually the sort of gay that's like, Oh, she's so glamorous. I love her. But honestly with Emma, I kind of am like that. Like she doesn't really have too much personality. She's just sort of reserved and nice, but like, I really am obsessed with her. So Emma, uh, she's gonna, she's gonna have like, um, they're gonna have like tea in the rangerie and then they're gonna do, they're gonna go on the boat tour, which is hilarious.

8:26Ben Mandelker: That's like, yes. So today's itinerary, once you get to my house is we're gonna get on the giant boat and we are going to go through my private safari. And then afterwards, we're going to go to my rangerie and have tea, which is just, it's just wild. It's so wild to I'm like, I don't know. I think I'm, I don't know what to do with myself. Yeah.

8:46Ronnie Karam: To me, it's like hanging out at a mall. It's like hanging out at a really fancy mall. I feel bad for her. You're like, oh my God, she's so glamorous. I'm obsessed. And I'm like, this poor girl has to work 24 hours a day. I'm exhausted just watching her. Like we see her walking around in her little, you know, safari sweater uniform thing. And I'm like, I just, I wouldn't marry that. I wouldn't marry somebody who this was my job to like walk around and please people all day. This is weird. It's like marrying into wealth, but then having to become like a waiter captain is what it felt like to me.

9:17Ronnie Karam: And I felt bad. I want her to be, I want to come pick her up and like let her escape because this shit looks hard.

9:22Ben Mandelker: The worst is when you like, when your job is like you're there to just professionally make people happy. Anyway, watch crappins.

9:32Ronnie Karam: Yeah, but our job doesn't require constant grace or being classy all day, you know, thank God.

9:38Ben Mandelker: Well, I'm not saying I'm envious of her because I wouldn't want to live there. I'm just saying I think it's like wild. I love when Bravo can take us into a world that is like totally foreign to me. And just like, I just think it's such a contrast from everything else going on. I'm just like so amused and like impressed, not impressed, but like I just find that the gulf of experiences between something like this versus Tom Schwartz's apartment is like so amazing that Bravo can have this all. so i just am i i love seeing it i love gawking at it so uh it's time to go to long leach so they get into their amazing black cars i love these black cars too by the way just for the cars alone

10:20Ronnie Karam: i love this show the yeah the cars are nice yeah they're really they're very glamorous on the inside

10:26Ben Mandelker: can we ever go back to a sprinter van i'm just not sure yeah so they're in two they're in two

10:32Ronnie Karam: different vans and there's the m car with miss a margo margo and martha and mark and micah are in another car so they're also m's there's a lot of m's on this show basically yeah and um mike is like oh my god you are fat look at your little suit like if i was a man i would want to look just like you and he's like oh well if i was a woman i would want to be just like you

10:59Ben Mandelker: um so then they're like uh kimmy's like well i'm here i've got a beer's back she does that thing where she like throws her shoulder into her joke. She's like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. She's like, I love drinking. I love wine. I call it just a little personality announcer. And Micah's like, yeah, any journey with Kimmy, you know it's going to be a good time. I'm like, maybe for you. I don't know if it's going to go the other way around for Kimmy with Micah. Oh, I got stuck in the Micah car.

11:30Ronnie Karam: So we see Emma riding a bike around the property and making preparations for tea. and she's like, heaven guess it Longleat, it's quite complicated, you've got to always streamline whatever you're doing alongside what's already happening, I mean, Longleat's open to the public all throughout the year, so if people are coming, have to curate the experience around the time of the year, what's happening on the estate, what event, there might be concerts, there might be hot air balloons, there's always something, and when people come to Longleat, it feel like a dream, let's show me which case feels like shoveling shit and scheduling hot air balloons

12:09Ben Mandelker: and they keep showing footage of this diana ross concert that was there uh which is hilarious um so uh what i also like is that the one car stops at a gas station and they actually go into like the convenience store and i feel like we didn't spend enough time in here we didn't like see how amusing it was to see these these women in the convenience store maybe because they were just totally chill and normal unlike if it had been real house as a beverly hills it'd be like oh my god look they've got candy bars candy bars can you believe they got so many candy bars by the cash register have you ever seen so many candy bars

12:43Ronnie Karam: i doubt kimmy was subtle i doubt kimmy was subtle in the 7-eleven you know saying what's an eminem can i drink it

12:52Ben Mandelker: i'm gonna throw these eminems at margo if she's a bitch she's just getting some coffee i just loved it i love kimmy just sitting there getting coffee from the machine that sad gas station coffee but she doesn't care she's like i'm gonna get my coffee i don't care i call this a personality enhancer as well so lottie is shit talking with mark she's

13:13Ronnie Karam: she's stirring the pot she's like how are you feeling about seeing margo he's like i've always struggled with people who don't have a sense of humor who aren't quick who can't take it you notice he does the stress thing with the beginning of his words he's like i've always struggled with people who don't have a sense of humor what quick who can't take it it's got this like weird way of

13:37Ben Mandelker: stressing like the first letter of each word he's like doing like fop talk to the extreme so uh he basically i love i love mark he's like you know i just can't i can't understand someone who doesn't have a sense of humor and nothing says a sense of humor than living in a rococo palace with gold with gold paisley accents across all of your furniture there's nothing about his his lifestyle that says this is a man with a sense of humor but he is very funny i just think it's very i think the irony is that he has a very serious looking life and style and yet he's complaining about someone taking themselves too seriously.

14:19Ronnie Karam: He explains, you see, in Britain, we tend not to talk about emotions. You know, if you're going to give it, you have to be able to take it. And I can take it. She's like, oh, 100%, Mark, 100%. And if we must, we use humour to deflect. Well, I've had a conversation with her, and she's been quite sensitive about it, actually. Sensitive about what? Somebody not liking her boots?

14:45Ben Mandelker: Yeah, but like, it wasn't just about the boots. I think that like they've lost track of what Margot was mad about. At this point, it's that when they were bitching about Margot at someone's apartment, then they or I forget where they were. It was a Mark's apartment.

15:02Ronnie Karam: But when they had, yeah, they were having like the posh people party. And then the other people were having like the cheesy Margot party with, you know, bad non-alcoholic wine.

15:10Ben Mandelker: so Kimmy was bitching about Margot and Mark was like well I heard someone came to my garden party and said that Margot is quite the actress so that's what Margot was mad at not the boots comment I mean I still am not on Margot's side but like Mark is definitely overlooking what actually caused this fight and his role in it

15:33Ronnie Karam: yeah but even that was I think he's looking at it like that was just such a dumb little comment like I called her fake you know like who cares but they do keep bringing him a lot he's like yes it's about people making comments about her outfits and he's like oh well get over it or dress better quite frankly

15:51Ben Mandelker: so margo of course is going on and on in her car she's like it's just so uncomfortable because they talk shit about me behind my back just like snip at me and i'm like like i was on the polo pony and i could hear them talking about me and we see the flashback of them talking shit about her

16:09Ronnie Karam: and then um in the other car which she's got a point but that's what you're doing too i mean that's every scene is you talking shit about them every single scene it's like oh my god i hate him and he's so weird and i just don't like them and i hate them oh she's kissing your ass he's just friends with her because she's rich and i like mark here he's like i think the nicest thing you

16:31Ben Mandelker: can do to anyone to their face is to say something nice because yeah it may be a bit fake most compliments are not necessarily authentic but when you see someone and you say to them you look fantastic it's so wonderful to see you my god you look great you look ravaging you're a slut whatever it is if someone does that to me they've made my day and i don't care whether it's true or

16:58Ronnie Karam: not i really don't care and micah's just like um you just said all of those things to me about five minutes ago exactly thank you for getting it micah and lottie's like well i really just think that this is a case that margot doesn't understand mark's humor you know american humor is very different from british humor i mean justice for lvp like why didn't this come out six years ago or whatever i know i love that this cast is just laying it out on the table they're like if you don't get it you don't go here okay yeah mike is like it took me a few years to understand british

17:33Ben Mandelker: sense of humor i i'm totally sure i still seem to get it um it's a lot of them just looking at me and laughing and rolling their eyes and then they just say oh it's just british humor and i just laugh along with it i don't think it's great you know i would i moved here and then people would

17:46Ronnie Karam: say to me oh we're having a party and i would say when they're saying not for you you know things like that really funny people or i would i would come and i say oh my god what a lovely dinner right and i'd start to sit down they'd say no not here i mean they really are just funny funny

18:01Ben Mandelker: people really funny yeah my my husband i said are you ever going to come back and he said i'm never coming back i'm leaving you and i was like why did you say that and he says british humor so i guess i guess i'm just really funny people really funny yes well there's different definitely a culture

18:21Ronnie Karam: clash we have culture and you clash do you understand because like are they joking are they not joking is this funny i mean i guess it's funny i'm laughing right i'm sitting alone at a table i'm not going to a party even i don't even know what this is mushy stuff is but it's pretty it's pretty funny i'm only crying i'm cry laughing i'm cry laughing mark is like i mean you're

18:43Ben Mandelker: concerned about peace wait till i get to your personality then i will destroy you sweetheart

18:49Ronnie Karam: British humor, Micah British humor So in the other car, Margot's like, I mean, they have bullied me and they have put me in a corner Okay

18:57Ben Mandelker: Even Missy, Missy who like the queen trauma dumper is like well, I think it's more than okay that Margot stood up for being mean, but like, this is a bit much So then Lottie in the other car is like she has this impression that you're this nasty person and I know that you're not, you're a very nice person like well it doesn't bother me because if you're smart you get it yeah well if somebody insults

19:24Ronnie Karam: you you laugh at it and they don't insult you again i mean god we have to teach these people

19:29Ben Mandelker: everything or come back at them with something sharper or smarter well i think that as time has gone on i've understood your personality a bit more and now i find you hilarious that's why i I got you a comedy suit. Do you want to put it on? No, no, no more seats, Lottie.

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21:22Ronnie Karam: This episode is notable because this is when all of the people who were on Margo's side realized that Margo's just a whining asshole and they don't want to be on her side anymore. And it's really funny because it all happens at one time where Margo just pushes it too far and they're like, yeah, he's fun. they're like every time we're in this group we look over and that group is really having a good time and our group is not we're listening to this lady in a thong bitch it's like this is not

21:48Ben Mandelker: fine this is not fine and also Margot is like a bit gauche for like at this country estate and I think they're like all kind of mortified and they just don't want to associate with her Margot this is the episode where Margot truly kind of becomes Juliet angus from the original ladies of london just the obnoxious american she sort of always teetered on it but this episode it's like oh yes the spirit of juliet is with us now yeah so martha's like well

22:18Ronnie Karam: i think moving forward there's a way that you can react you know that that won't escalate it further you know um there's a way you can de-escalate and margo's like well they're like still holding me to this like nastiness. They're like nasty to me though.

22:34Ben Mandelker: Oh, but you'll respond to that by being nasty. But Martha... Don't give them what they want. But if I lose my temper,

22:42Ronnie Karam: you can't be like, oh, well, you did snap back. Like that's bullshit. They're like coming for me, Martha.

22:48Ben Mandelker: Hmm. Marga is, I'm not sure, going into this weekend with the right intention. She's saying, don't judge me if I lose my temper with Mark. Yeah, totally judging Mark. And I don't feel like she's going in weaving the white flag, as it were. What worries me is that you're both warriors, and I don't know when this is going to end.

23:08Ronnie Karam: It ends with me winning, Martha. I win. That's how it ends. No, it's not. This is not going to end up with you winning. This is going to end up with you crying, probably being, like, X'd out from the show, not having a career in London, and getting left by that man who clearly doesn't like you. Like, we all saw how this was ending a long time ago, and it's not going to end well for you. I'm sorry. Because I really don't hate her. I really don't hate Margot. I think she's annoying, but I like her and I like the casting that she will stand up to these people, but she's taking it a little... It's annoying now.

23:41Ronnie Karam: She's just bratty.

23:41Ben Mandelker: She's just bratty. I actually think she's really good casting because she's the rare kind of like villain in this situation who is funny too. I think that Margot is like legitimately very funny. Like she makes me laugh, but like I'm definitely not on her side. I think that she will... She's definitely cemented herself as like someone who will be on the show tacky American, like a foil for someone like Mark. So it does work, but she is really, really annoying. So then I actually, I love this entire cast. I like even Micah, who's sort of like the boring one. I think we need kind of the boring one in there.

24:14Ben Mandelker: Lottie is a little bit more low key, but I sort of like Lottie in this weird way. She's sort of like quiet, but also super judgy. Yeah, and I love her and her husband's weird, strange Tim Burton style, you know? So it all works

24:30Ronnie Karam: So then we go back to the other car And Kimmy's like oh god A three hour drive Well at least we're going somewhere that's not a winery And so they're talking about the other car And Mark's like well this is the More popular vehicle Well I think if Missy was in our car She'd be having a good time in this car The other two can stay over there Missy would love it over here

24:56Ben Mandelker: Missy's just yawning in the other car like oh time for nap so then Lottie is like well no I've been to Longleat but never as a guest of Emma so why was they out there water could you believe it Mark's like yes we were both at the wedding don't erase me I'm Emma's friend too Emma the wedding was a lot of fun more fun for me because I was a little bit closer I think I was sitting one

25:21Ronnie Karam: pew ahead of you kimmy is that it gosh i've been a long late for like 20 something years or something like that but i can't wait to go back i simply can't wait i love a husband can't wait to give him a lap dance it's been a long time you know what i mean it was like kimmy and mark have attended lots of parties my wedding my 30th you know big ones christenings you know proper shebang events they were there they were at all of those events i cleaned up after every single one of those planned each and every one of them.

25:55Ben Mandelker: Yes, so many shebang events. We literally had William Hung here and he sang Shebangs, Shebangs and Mark got up on a table and danced the Macarena. It didn't make any sense but I was happy for him.

26:08Ronnie Karam: Well, I don't even remember my first trip to Longleat, but I do remember that the theme of the dinner was Ancient Egypt and Kimi came as a Pharaoh. We see photos. Kimi is in fact dressed as a pharaoh it was like it was fabulous

26:24Ben Mandelker: it was worth it to suffer all those plagues at least i had a nice house lived in a pyramid so mark is like i cannot begin to think the number of stories and the madness that has ensued no one has ever left longleaf the same way uh they are acting by the way like they're going to jurassic park they kind of are going to jurassic park like this entire you know drive to longley definitely has the vibe of like lordurn on a helicopter going off to like isla nubar so they get there and there's dma encrusted all over the place in the in there they literally are doing jurassic park things in there emma tells us that they are using dna from an extinct rhinoceros to like impregnate their their rhinoceros to bring back so they are literally doing Jurassic Park.

27:15Ben Mandelker: But it'll be British Jurassic Park. It'll be very tame. Look at the rhinoceros.

27:19Ronnie Karam: It's running along with our car. It's chasing our car. It's on top of our car. Ah, my arm. My arm.

27:27Ben Mandelker: No, all the dinosaurs in British Jurassic Park will be very polite. Like, excuse me. I do believe the power's out and my cage has become deactivated. Would someone mind giving me a napkin?

27:39Ronnie Karam: I'm about to eat the man from Seinfeld.

27:43Ben Mandelker: Oh, it appears the man from Seinfeld got lost trying to leave the island. Shall I show him where to go? Awful.

27:51Ronnie Karam: So they drive through and it's, you know, the Jurassic Park music is playing as the gates open. You know, things flying in the air, waterfalls. And they're talking about how gorgeous it is and how palatial it is. And Lottie's like, I haven't been here since I was a child. I mean, I wasn't invited here, but I did pay a ticket to get here. oh god this is a real feat of british architectural state the public restrooms aren't bad either i have to say lovely smelling soaps there is like a fun little story that's not being emphasized at

28:22Ben Mandelker: all about how lottie basically was like middle class british and she's sort of come up in the world and now she's like hanging out with the aristocracy and her she's like wow mommy but like no one's really paying attention to that like no one is just there you know i think they pay

28:35Ronnie Karam: attention to it because she's always the one hanging out with the other new monies or americans you know it's like her missy margo micah that's that that's the the other like old moneyed ones are you having fun over there america that's true she is on the jv team remember when we gave them that god awful god forsaken country and pretended that we let them win it

29:04Ben Mandelker: so we start seeing then they're like welcome to longleat here's what all the halls look like so they obviously were not given permission to film inside of longleat so they just have to kind of like have these scanned in photos from the brochure like this is the great hall this is where we have breakfast every day and it's like this it's like a lithograph or something low res lithograph like like a 300 by 300 jpeg that's blown up on our tv but um we see all these things and mark is like one of the most magical things is this extraordinary drive to the house with these incredible views it's probably one of the most beautiful landscapes in england if you can look past the hideous pigeon feathers that margot wore for the ride so they drive up and emma comes

29:50Ronnie Karam: to greet them and um martha's like that lion statue has bulls and mark runs up to emma he's like oh my god it's emma look at you divine glorious the sun coming up in the morning the sun setting at night good lord woman you're amazing

30:17Ben Mandelker: margot's like um did everyone know mark is friends with emma did you know mark is on emma mark and emma they're friends is this really how he is with his friends yes

30:29Ronnie Karam: wealthy friends i've never known a gay person i mean that's my question to margo because margo does verge on problematic uh a lot with the stuff she's going through with mark and um like do you know any gay people at all because yes that's how we are with our friends girl yeah to a game

30:48Ben Mandelker: i feel bad for you he is a he is a dandy and he has just reunited with his gorgeous elegant extremely wealthy lady friend like we lose our minds we're like oh my god everything gay culture is all about.

31:08Ronnie Karam: So, yeah, that's what happens. Yeah, so Margot keeps imitating. She's like, oh, hello. I mean, does he talk to his mother like that? Ew. So, he's like, hello, Margot. Hello, how are you? Good to see you. And she's like, oh, hi. Bullying. That was like the way he said hello was like bullying.

31:30Ben Mandelker: Bullying. And then Kimmy does her thing where she like launches into her joke with her shoulders. She goes, by the way, what a dump. I just love the way she cracks her jokes. She's, she's like a full body joke for her. Um, and so they're all going to be put into different cottages and stuff. Um, because, uh, that's, this estate is big enough that there are cottages. It really is down. Now, but like the cottages that they wind up going to, or it looks like the, whenever in down Abbey, someone goes into town and they're like, Oh, look at that farmer. They're going to take care of my baby. these are the houses that those farmers live in.

32:06Ben Mandelker: And it's like, but it's real. Yeah.

32:09Ronnie Karam: Of course it's real. I know, but you have to like live, it's kind of like living in the servants' quarters. It's like, that's where Daisy lives from, um, that mad me. Daisy! Like, woo, isn't this lovely? Yeah. Thank you. So Margot loves it. And she's like really impressed with Emma. She's like, yeah, I seem like a different side to her. Like, I really like her now that I've seen that she lives in a castle. This is amazing. So Emma's like telling them how the lands are laid, basically. She's like, well, you know, that's where the different animals are. There's giraffes over there. There's rhinoceros over there.

32:41Ronnie Karam: Then you go over a hill to the monkey cage. Then there's a Broadway-level theater about five hills away from that. Then there's a train. Then there's a plane. There's an automobile. John Candy actually comes out of that volcano at night, surprises people every time. It's quite wonderful. Liza Minnelli isn't even dead yet, but her ghost is already staying in that cabin right over there. You're going to love it here.

33:06Ben Mandelker: You do have to ring a bell to get in, if you know what I'm saying. Yeah, it's crazy. They go on this boat ride. That's kind of like the Jungle Cruise at Disney, except it's real. And there's sea lions that come up, which is funny because you wouldn't think of sea lions in the same habitat as monkeys, but they're all there together. It's a hodgepodge of animals. And it's just wild. I think what's also crazy is that like this cast, I just, I don't see this cast really going to the zoo. And that's what they're doing. And it's just kind of funny seeing them like observing animals like Kimmy being like, oh, look, there's a monkey.

33:40Ben Mandelker: Isn't that fabulous? Isn't that crazy? I wonder if he wants a cocktail. Come on down here, monkey. Let's have some wine together.

33:47Ronnie Karam: Yeah. And Emma's telling us the Safari Park is run by International Conservation and lots of research is done here. we've actually mixed kimmy's dna in with a penguin and a sea lion and that's what you see here today what are you talking about her exactly the real kimmy's in a jar

34:11Ben Mandelker: we also see there is like this one monkey that's like standing on like a tree and mark's oh look it's marco's inspiration for her jacket or something like that we see like a side by side of like the monkey and marco's outfit it's like this show's so good why is there a monkey here they see a little red panda named lion it was so cute martha do you want this in your house like

34:37Ronnie Karam: of course i would i i would get a little red panda goggles just for hecate you know

34:43Ben Mandelker: never be too careful hecate would not allow that red panda lionel is not allowed in with hecate Hecate is calling the shots and Hecate's like, there will be no cuter animal in this place than me. So sorry, Lionel, you're staying in Longleat. God, Lionel is so cute. Oh my God, I could have just watched Lionel for an hour.

35:06Ronnie Karam: So Mark is like, oh, Lionel makes a wonderful accessory. So now they go on this boat and we're learning about all the different animals. and then we see gorillas and I love that we got one shot of the gorilla and the gorilla was just like slicked his hair back real quick and just kept looking at him like hi I'm a hot gorilla

35:29Ben Mandelker: welcome

35:30Ronnie Karam: welcome to my habitat

35:32Ben Mandelker: it's like that gorilla that like became viral a few years ago for being hot and then this is where we see that monkey and Mark saying like now I see what Mark got that inspiration yeah and Martha's like oh look at all these dangerous animals i wish i could have in close quarters in my apartment

35:52Ronnie Karam: she's losing her mind she's so happy and they're like wow those gorillas they just posture and pound their chests and emma's like oh that mark does posturing as well it's more like chimpanzee versus gorilla i think i'm sorry that's an old inside longleat joke then the sea lion comes up

36:13Ben Mandelker: and they now have to feed the sea lions.

36:15Ronnie Karam: It's just so cute. So they put on some rubber gloves and Kimmy's like, Martha, you better bend over. It's time for your rectal exam.

36:25Ben Mandelker: I cracked up when she did that. They're just so funny on this show at all times. Except for Missy. Missy's not that funny. But Missy is like, oh, Emma, we could do house swap. How would you like that? House swap, okay? Don't take her up on that, Emma.

36:39Ronnie Karam: we've seen missy's house yeah so then um margo starts bullying the hippo margo's like oh my god that hippo is so mean to me you're really fast for a fatty you're really fast can we not fat shame the hippos it's like it's how they were born okay they're also the most dangerous animal here so i'm sorry the hippo's not jerking somebody off in the cinema but he's still a decent person okay yeah that's some respect so then this is where emma tells us

37:09Ben Mandelker: about how they're trying to resuscitate the northern white African rhino. And then she was like, oh, and we also have a whole eucalyptus farm here just for the koalas. Just a bonus eucalyptus farm. She's like, oh, and there's the red panda you saw. That's done in Nepal. So we got so much going on. And Marika's like, what's really wonderful is the way in which they all coexist in such harmony. If only we were able to do the same, right? And then Margo rolls her eyes.

37:40Ronnie Karam: She's like, that was bullying. You see? That was bullying, you guys. So Emma's like, there will be a test at the end of the ride, everybody. And they're like, oh, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi. So Marco keeps giving looks to Marco on the boat. She's clearly trying to start a fight, and he just ignores her and keeps laughing. I'm not getting dragged down to this level with you, lady. So now they go back to the proper tea to have some tea. and they have some tea drinks in this like oranzerie as you called it and well no first they go see their cottages and they're like Micah, Margot, Lottie you're going to be in the gardener's cottage sorry you're just kind of like leaf blower types so I'm going to stick you in there

38:26Ben Mandelker: and then the other girls are going to be in the prairie lodge which is funny because I don't think there's anything resembling a prairie out here and then they just give they put Mark in a place called he's in the bath arms which is a pub that's two miles away and she's like well i thought he'd be happier in the pub doesn't need to interact with people for longer than it's necessary and he's like oh the idea of being in a pub let alone sleeping in one is not something that would intrinsically please me however on this occasion not being in either of these cottages comes as a

38:57Ronnie Karam: pure delight so everybody goes to get changed and we see all these little cottages and stuff And then Micah and Margot and Lottie are talking about the car ride. And Lottie's like, well, ours wasn't very relaxed, although it was entertaining. And we see flashbacks to talking about designer kids' clothes. And Kimmy's like, oh, those are awful, awful. No one wants to see a designer child. Let's throw a sack over them, call it a day.

39:28Ben Mandelker: Mark goes, it's obtuse, it's obscene. I wore sailor outfits for the first six years of my life, and that is all a child should wear.

39:37Ronnie Karam: And the funny part is he's not even kidding because we saw pictures of him as a child last week. And it's like a little tiny boy in sailor outfits, holding little tiny martinis and pipes.

39:47Ben Mandelker: And what's also funny is that they're saying this to Lottie, who is clearly planning to make some designer duds for her child with her husband. Yes. Clearly going to make, I mean, her husband is literally a high-end designer. and she even said at the gender reveal, she's like, little mini seats. I can't wait for the mini seats. It's like mini seats, mini seats, mini seats, mini seats.

40:10Ronnie Karam: They're like disgusting, obtuse, revolting. And she doesn't get mad. She just laughs, you know. So he's like, can you have guinea fowl for Thanksgiving? Oh, I'd love to. Turkey's just so abhorrent, isn't it? God, it's just so full of things. Like gizzards and innards and stuff like that. It's like disgusting.

40:33Ben Mandelker: It's so American. And then another part, Mark is like, Mark, how's your German?

40:37Ronnie Karam: I love them shaming turkeys.

40:39Ben Mandelker: I know, they're covering a wide range of topics because now Michael goes, Mark, how's your German? He goes, nein! And they all just like, I mean, he's like, so Lottie is like, I just feel like Mark and I kind of bonded a little bit. Turns out we both detest turkey. It's quite nice to bond.

40:59Ronnie Karam: What do you bond over? over what? What do you mean he bonded? She goes, you know, just like having a one-on-one conversation with him. I sat opposite from him in the car, so it was like, you know, we could actually talk, and I could see that he's actually fun and friendly, and nothing like you're describing him to me, basically. And Micah's like, oh, yeah, was he friendly? How was he right now, Margot? Was he friendly? She goes, well, I mean, he said hello. God, might as well have tripped me in the hallway.

41:26Ben Mandelker: God, I just had this vision of this cast going to the next Bravo con and i just uh what i would do to be able just to sit with them and have a cocktail because you know they're going to squirrel away at some bar in the middle of vegas and just talk shit about all the trashy people on bravo like oh did you hear that did you meet that person on the real housewives of beverly hills i think her name was dorit oh my god she she thinks she's from the continent i'll tell you one thing she is from the continent the continent of stupidity right

42:00Ronnie Karam: so uh and by the way we will be sitting and having drinks with them at bravo con are you kidding of course we will so uh marco's like yeah well i mean he said hello but like with mark that means nothing because he's so fake it's a lot it's like being nice to someone's just being polite

42:17Ben Mandelker: isn't it doesn't mean that you're fake it's like well i don't know because he never talks talk to me and lottie's like well i just feel like i'm just understanding him a lot more that's all and it is so funny also the cultural divide here where the brits are kind of like um it doesn't cost anything just to be nice to someone just say something nice be polite there's nothing wrong with that but the americans are like if it's not sincere then fuck that it needs to be authentic at all times and that is like a very american thing like i feel like like the biggest crime it often seems like is the crime of inauthenticity you know people often get we see people get angrier at people on these shows for being inauthentic than for for some of the things that they do that are like legitimately bad bad bad behaviors and i just think it's so funny seeing margo get caught up on this of like yeah you may be nice to me but it's fake it's not even real so

43:08Ronnie Karam: like what what's even i would rather a fake nice person than a real bee you know yeah so then we go to Kimmy and Martha's place, and Martha's like, oh, how are you and Margot getting on today? Are you making peace? She's like, oh, God, I haven't even said much. I haven't said anything. She hasn't said much. I think her problem's more with Mark now than me.

43:31Ronnie Karam: So she's like, be nice to her. So then we go back to Lottie, and she's like, you know, he just thinks that everyone needs to not take everything so seriously and have a sense of humor. And, you know, the things you've been upset about, he hasn't really meant them to be that deep is what he's trying to say she goes well that's a cop-out i mean what you're what what you're upset about doesn't even matter sorry marco ah god margo you're such a fucking wet blanket good lord you're almost wet enough to wear yeah lottie's like but we're

44:00Ben Mandelker: just talking about dress sense i mean does it really matter margo's like i don't think lottie's gone to the dark side but it does seem a little bit murky and micah's like i think margo sees other people loving Mark and she's like what like how can you love somebody that I don't love and it's like hard for her to see but I'm gonna help her out with the help of puppets okay this puppet is Mark and this is Margo talk and then Lottie says I mean she's she's wearing a tank top with

44:29Ronnie Karam: nipple tassels and then we cut to her in the car with this tank top with nipple tassels and she goes I mean if I'm invited to this estate I don't think I would be the time for me to wear nipple tassels

44:43Ben Mandelker: it's like oh yes lottie's turned finally yes yeah and it's true too by the way i feel like you gotta like respect the customs right so margo says if someone said to me i don't like what you're wearing but he that's what he said no it's not he told me i love everything you're wearing you're amazing you're beautiful and then i turned around and he's like gathered people to whisper behind my back and that's just like not a nice feeling so mike is like but you know we did tell him your words hurt her and he said i don't like to hurt people and i will only hurt people who dress

45:14Ronnie Karam: terribly so i mean i think that means something he's gonna be cognizant now so um even mike is like i mean marco really needs to understand british humor you know the other day i was handling a taxi and he rolled down the window and he said not you and then he drove off i mean These guys, they are really funny country.

45:39Ben Mandelker: I don't want to be the middle of you two because you and I are also friends. But at the same time, you standing up to him is going to stop him from chatting shit about you behind your back. She's like, you think so? I do think so. He's an enormous pussy, so confront him.

45:54Ronnie Karam: Well, you don't really change somebody with a conversation. I mean, they just turn around and they just keep doing it. She's like, well, I'm beginning to wonder if Margo's the problem. because she really enjoys this drama. You know, I don't understand her motives, but we're arguing about boots. It's embarrassing. Marco's like, nobody's on my side. Like, nobody. And, like, it's, like, fine. Like, I'm not asking you to take sides. I'm not, like, asking you to fight my battles. But, like, please go to him and argue with him the rest of the episode about me, okay? Like, I want you guys to be aware that that's how I feel.

46:25Ronnie Karam: And I'm, like, alone. Like, I'm alone. Because, like, even Martha's like, but I love everybody. And I'm like, well, I want her to love everybody, but it's not her fight but like it's not my fight either like why am i fighting well we don't want

46:36Ben Mandelker: you to feel like that that's a horrible feeling you are not alone but you are also the poorest of this group so we're going to be friends with mark instead okay thanks so uh now everyone's getting ready and um lottie is wearing this kind of like nutcracker marching band jacket i love

46:53Ronnie Karam: this jacket it was crazy it had like a ton of little um gold foil covered bonbons on it

47:00Ben Mandelker: It was not unlike your jacket for the crappies, I have to say. Oh, yeah. Similar. Look at you. You were basically doing Lottie before Lottie was doing Lottie. I basically made it. Yeah. I invented it.

47:12Ronnie Karam: And then Martha and Missy are getting ready. And Martha's like, I look dumpy. Missy says, what does dumpy mean? Like middle-aged and fat. I'm just like, stop it. Commercials. Here comes one right now.

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48:39Ronnie Karam: So now we go to the Orangerie. and everybody is greeting each other to go over there and making small talk and stuff. And Lottie's like, oh, did you all talk about the Mark thing? Because we did. And Missy's like, no, not much. I mean, maybe a little bit, but no one cares.

48:57Ben Mandelker: Mark was just saying that she should just try to get a sense of humor. It's just a joke. She should try to get a sense of humor. That's all. Just try to get a sense of humor. Have you looked in the back of the newspaper? Some people are selling senses of humor. Have you tried to get one from there?

49:12Ronnie Karam: and she thinks that he's not having an you know she thinks it's it's two-faced and he's fake and she's like oh really yeah and she was very upset and she said she feels alone like oh gosh okay you guys need to just leave it alone this is not your thing to go talk to mark about it which they

49:28Ben Mandelker: both will do because at the same time but they're not but they they they're sort of like listlessly involving themselves because they're not like that that impassioned which is kind of funny they're like you should really do this because otherwise it's bothersome and laddie's like well

49:44Ronnie Karam: i think they're checking i think they're checking temperature with each other to be like uh margo's the problem right it's like did you talk about it yeah maybe she needs a sense of humor like

49:54Ben Mandelker: it's a bit insulting that she feels like she's alone then what what are we spent milk so then mark mark meets up he's like oh welcome to tea when we came for champagne She's like, well, I don't have any, sorry. Oh, Emma, never have I heard a worse lie.

50:13Ronnie Karam: Oh, bad girl, bad, bad girl. So he's talking about the wedding, Emma's wedding, and the orangery. She's like, we married in 2013 here. It was massive, 400 people. My father had guests wearing Nigerian robes because that's traditional. It was fabulous. Look at the pictures. She's like, a total spectacle. So there was all Emma's family. You had society, you had a school friends, a childhood friends. It was magnificent. Magnificent.

50:42Ben Mandelker: Glorious. Huge gilded. It was a bit odd when Kimmy showed up still dressed as the pharaoh, but we said, whatever, go with it. It was great. It was probably one of the best weddings I've ever been to before. Actually, I was wearing this hat at Emma's wedding. Funnily enough, huh?

50:58Ronnie Karam: Really, the only reason I was wearing it at that wedding was because I took it off one of the peacocks outside. They'd stuffed one of the peacocks, I cut off its tail, and turned it into a heart. I'm still wearing it today.

51:12Ben Mandelker: So they're just sort of making small talk. Micah previews that she has a big event coming up, because it's going to be the launch of her latest kind of etiquette thing that's like, it's not about teaching etiquette, it's just about being kind of empowering and like holding space and having confidence. It's sort of like a vague thing. It's kind of like she needs to work on her branding for sure.

51:38Ronnie Karam: Cause she's like, I'm not trying to teach etiquette to British people. You guys are not British etiquette. I'm trying to teach them that etiquette is also having self-confidence and making yourself known when you're in a room. I would try to explain that to people, but I walk into a room and they leave. They're just so funny here, but you know, so much you guys think I'm trying to keep teach etiquette to British people, even though I teach something called etiquette to British people. Should I work on that?

52:03Ben Mandelker: It's going to be a great event. Great event. Everyone gets a complimentary pink walkie-talkie. So I'll see you all there. So they're like, oh, that is so amazing. I love that you're doing that. What's a big achievement, whatever it is. Can't really follow it, but cool. And Margot's like, oh my God, you're like the Martha Stewart of etiquette. They're like, oh my God, thanks. I love Martha. I love Martha. You know Martha Stewart's like, I'm going to write a sternly written letter to Andy Cohen to remove this show from the air.

52:30Ronnie Karam: So they're, yeah.

52:33Ben Mandelker: Micah.

52:34Ronnie Karam: Yeah. So they're standing around having like pre-drinks and laughing. And it's so big that it's echoing. Like it's hard to get any sound in here because like the room is reverberating. It's huge. And so Micah's like, well, I'm a little peckish, but I'm just, you know, it's okay. I'll wait. We're going to eat soon because we see these big, gorgeous trays

52:55Ben Mandelker: of tea food you know it's gorgeous and they're in like the waiters area like they're they're meant to be put out on the tables once it's time to sit for tea i'm not even sure that these are meant for this group or not but whatever they're just they're the side and so marco's like oh well if you're hungry that's fine and so she goes she grabs one of the towers of tea food and sandwich you know little finger sandwiches etc and she just brings it to the table and just starts eating off

53:22Ronnie Karam: it and everyone's like oh you know yeah and then even worse she's like oh my god can i get some silverware i'm gonna need some silverware for this god they don't give you silverware around here geez it's not time to eat you fucking nitwit oh you're so embarrassing it's like literally being

53:44Ben Mandelker: at the restaurant and like just like grabbing something off of the pass and be like okay i'll take this i'm like lady it's not your turn and emma's like oh so she decided to start oh okay i

53:55Ronnie Karam: won't say anything okay and everybody's mortified they're like oh my god you're not supposed to eat at someone else's party until they offer you the food but no one will say anything and margo's just like shoving it down with her hands and they're like oh no this is so a lot is like you're starting

54:12Ben Mandelker: to insult the host. What's the throwback to Ben? I was going to say Sarah eating the bow off of Heather Dubrow's cake. It's not entirely the same thing.

54:25Ronnie Karam: Same level of class for sure. For sure. So we go to Margot and she's like, I don't know if these are meant to be them, but I'm going to fucking eat them.

54:34Ben Mandelker: Or British. It's a British. So it's like a So Micah, they're all just like so uncomfortable with how like gauche Margot is being right now. She's like, I'm starving. I'm not drinking my calories. I need food. And Emma's like, okay, well, they've started their tea over there privately, I suppose. It's like, oh, I didn't realize that you had invited people to do that.

54:59Ronnie Karam: Well, I might not say it, but you know what I'm thinking because my head tilts and my eyes have clothes and I look sort of exhausted.

55:08Ben Mandelker: Are you getting it? And they're like, okay, I guess we'll start tea. So Martha's like, oh, okay, it's time to start tea. Well, I don't, I don't want to be a tartar, which we see as someone who is strict or bad tempered, which I love. I'm like, oh, I'm such a tartar right now. Better get some food in my belly.

55:27Ronnie Karam: So they're like, oh my God, what do you guys have? Do you like cream first or jam first? What do we do? And Martha's like, I have, I have cream and then jam. Sorry, sue me.

55:40Ben Mandelker: When I, I went to when I went to my scone making class in London two years ago They told me all about this big debate that rages across all of England, which is when you have your scone Do you put the jam on first or do you put the cream on first and I was like? Well, obviously in my mind. I was like well obviously you would start with like the clotted cream and then put the jam on top and I was like that's the only way to do it But I have to say I did try it as an experiment With the jam first and the cream on top which felt weird felt weird to spread cream on top of the jam but it was quite delicious that way.

56:12Ben Mandelker: I'm not going to lie. Loki may have liked it even more.

56:16Ronnie Karam: I'm still fighting with people about how to make a peanut butter sandwich. You glop the peanut butter on there, then you glop on the jelly on top of the peanut butter, and you close the sandwich. I know. Jelly gets its own slice and you close them together. I don't want even jelly. I want little clumps of jelly around the sandwich.

56:35Ben Mandelker: That's it. No, it should be a romance. once one has one bread, one has another bread, and the two bread bring them together in a meet cute. But they do not start on top of each other. They do not start hooking up, okay? Yeah.

56:48Ronnie Karam: So it's like a glob. Imagine what do army people wear? It's called camouflage. It's supposed to look like camouflage. There's the peanut butter, and then there's just jelly kind of swimming around. There's little glops, little pieces, like waves throughout there. That's art. That's how you make a peanut butter jelly. When you put the jelly on the bread first, you put the jelly all over the bread. It's even and then it soaks into the bread and makes the bread a little bit wet with this. It's not how you do it. Yes, I want.

57:18Ben Mandelker: I personally love when you bite into a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. As you bite into it, you get that kind of like cold rush of the jelly, like a nice cold jelly. And then all of a sudden you get that layer of peanut butter. And I feel like if you just get speckles of jelly, you're really just getting peanut butter with like jelly accents. And I want layers.

57:39Ronnie Karam: No, it's not speckles. It's globs. So you get globs. So you get like a nice big jelly. And the next one could be almost all peanut butter. You know, it keeps it interesting. It's like a dance. It's a dance in your mouth. But you know what? Some people are artists and some people aren't. So there's no offense to non-artists. We need people to clean our homes.

58:00Ben Mandelker: I don't want. I actually literally, if I bite into a peanut butter and jelly, sandwich and I get all peanut butter, I will be actively upset. I want there to be, I want there to be the ratio, the ratio of both of them in each bite.

58:15Ronnie Karam: You know, I want consistency. Listen, I think a good thing about friendship is when you accept when your friend is wrong. I think that's super important. And I accept you. I still love you. I love you too, despite. I'm never eating one of your sandwiches, but I love you. So, Missy, they're going over this. Like, cream first. Martha's makes more sense to me. She believes in cream first. You put the cream like the butter, and then you put the jam. That's how hard you do it, too.

58:42Ben Mandelker: Same. And honestly, that's still really how I've done it, when I've sort of done a fake version of it here at home. But I'm here to report that when you do the jelly first, it works shockingly well. Way better than you'd ever expect.

58:57Ronnie Karam: Yeah. Okay, so... I'm gonna make a scone after this. Missy's like, I didn't know there was a way of eating a scone. We know, Missy.

59:09Ronnie Karam: Embarrassing.

59:09Ben Mandelker: Missy's learning so many things this season.

59:11Ronnie Karam: Missy literally doesn't know anything. She's literally surprised. She's surprised by doorbells. She's like, oh my God, what is that? Someone's at the door. What a good idea. I just go to the door. I open it every day just seeing when people are there. sometimes they are, sometimes they aren't.

59:31Ben Mandelker: Lottie, meanwhile, is like, she's trying so hard not to fangirl out. She's like, it really doesn't get more British than this. Sipping tea in this beautiful orangery in the grounds of the Longleat Manor with a lady and marching nurse of Bath. It's every little girl's dream come true, and I'm just pretending I'm one of Emma's little ladies-in-waiting. And then a gorilla bursts through and rips her head off. It's how I want to die.

59:56Ronnie Karam: so anyway it's your first visit here some of you if you want to know any information let me know i just feel like i talk about it a lot and i sound insane you know look look at those gorillas waiting for tea time to eat their tea you know i know it can sound old but you know if you need

1:00:14Ben Mandelker: something just call me i did love when she goes i talk about this so much and i probably sound and sing when I talk about it. I promise myself

1:00:24Ronnie Karam: not to open up any more snack times by bragging about the rhinoceros that we've impregnated with a penguin. Placenta.

1:00:33Ben Mandelker: I mean, Emma does have a very wry sense of humor that's way more low-key than Martha and Kimmy and Mark, but I really enjoy it. So then Lati is saying how she has so much respect for Emma and you really see the scale and the scope of all the things that she's doing here in long lead and she's an amazing role model and i've decided i'm going to make a giant suit for this house there it's happening um so they just keep making small talk about the place and telling

1:01:02Ronnie Karam: him that she's doing amazing and she's like you know um you know the important thing is like you meet you meet and you sorry you meet your husband you get married and you have to come into this kind of thing and then you have to make it better like it's a whole job you know that you have to make better and i said a couple weeks ago that this reminded me of ladies of london original with uh the chick who was the heir of sandwich the earl of sandwich or whatever and she's like oh my god how are we gonna keep it open jump balls we're making jewels balls and we're gonna sell them we're gonna do yoga classes on the lawn and this operation is just so much bigger and emma's just so much more in charge um i know they really won up their game here for sure they really did

1:01:46Ben Mandelker: Earl of Sandwich is definitely being upstaged by Longleat. That's for sure.

1:01:52Ronnie Karam: Although I was at Disneyland recently and they had an Earl of Sandwich shop. And I thought, God damn it, Julie, still working it. Good for you, babe. Yeah.

1:02:03Ben Mandelker: It almost makes me wonder if there's a British analog for the corn dog castle that they have at California Adventure. Sure. It's like that corn dog castle is based off of the country estate of Lady Loch Ness.

1:02:16Ronnie Karam: or something um so they're talking about how she and margo's like wow to get married for love and then end up in this role is big like you're so good at it that's crazy yeah and uh and then

1:02:31Ben Mandelker: then kimmy's like by the way do you have like a teddy for mimi mimi wants a giraffe or teddy which was funny because when kimmy asked this question the camera like zooms in on her and when she goes by the way i was like oh shit here it comes she's gonna spill it she's gonna kimmy's about to say something vicious and then when she's like do you have a teddy bear for my child i was really caught off guard by that you know once in a while i do act like a soft bitch myself getting a toy for my child but you know it's what a mom has to do once in a while all right

1:03:02Ronnie Karam: let me just rewrite that so no one no one starts disrespecting me all right i need something for my child, do you have a teddy bear or a bottle of vodka?

1:03:13Ben Mandelker: How about do you have a tiara? And Emma's like, oh, you can't have it, Mark. And it turns out that there's like this very big prominent tiara that belongs to the estate. And then Martha explains, she goes, we're at Buckingham Palace, the gift shop. They have some really good fake tiaras. I want the Caledonian ball. And everyone I went to the Bucky and Ballast gift shop.

1:03:40Ronnie Karam: But what about that tiara that you're wearing in your wedding photo, Emma? She's like, oh, it's on display in my dress. And so we see the dress and tiara on display in the house. And Lottie's like, oh, so it's real jewels passed down. Is that something that each person wears? And they're like, yes, that's the Weymouth tiara.

1:04:00Ben Mandelker: I love how the people of a certain class in Britain, of like a certain amount of wealth, they don't really have to be, like, they don't have to be burdened with knowing things about the world. So they're just like stuffed with all this information about various jewels and artifacts of the aristocracy. Oh, of course, the Weymouth tiara. If I could have worn that to the Caledonian ball, I would have, but I couldn't.

1:04:25Ronnie Karam: So they're talking about how Lottie's like, I would just wear that when I'm sad. And everyone laughs at him and goes, yeah, I'll just lie on the floor watching Family Guy wrapped in a blanket tiara. So you smoke and wonder if there will ever come a day where you don't smell like rhinoceros shit. I get it. I get it actually.

1:04:45Ben Mandelker: I'm sure Mark was very confused with the Family Guy reference. He's like, unless it's the sins, I don't really know what you're talking about.

1:04:53Ronnie Karam: That's a great one. In the bathroom crying, I put my tiara on. So now they move to outside where there's more tables and more waiters. more things more things to serve them and um and Kimmy and Mark are walking around arm in arm laughing at nothing and Martha's like English country weekends are quite a lot about drinking because English culture is drinking yeah when you go to the countryside you start with the drink on the way you arrive you have drinks of tea you go back to your room you have another drink more dinner and then you have pre-dinner drinks then you have drinks at dinner and you go back to your room you have more drinks drinks what else do you do in the countryside

1:05:38Ben Mandelker: sounds like fun sounds like my childhood jesus yeah so martha's talking to margo she goes well you and kimmy seems to be getting along well she was like well yeah which is great because i just really needed a fucking break i mean my to my face she's super nice but i don't know what she's cackling about behind my back. She's like, well, yes, darling, but whatever people say about us behind our backs is actually none of our business. She's like, shut the fuck up.

1:06:05Ronnie Karam: Who cares? Lisa Minna's like, I wrote that. I came up with that one. So then we go to Mark with Lottie and Missy sitting down, and Lottie's like, well, I spoke to Margot. Oh, God, don't start this, please. It's so fun. So I spoke to Margot in the cottage I was trying to explain to her that you weren't being nasty, but she wasn't having any of it, and she's not listening, and I think you two need a conversation. He goes, well, listen, that's fine. I'm very sorry about that, but equally, I'm sorry about the VPL. And Missy's like, what is VPL? Visible panty lines.

1:06:51Ben Mandelker: And then we see that she actually does have a VPL. It's pretty prominent in her dress. And Mark is like, VPL was a well-known thing when I was growing up. There's more underwear than dress. I think it's bad to have a visible thong at the beach. I think it's worse at Longleat House. It's just not chic. I will never be close to someone who walks around in a transparent dress. Missy goes, but I have worn a fucking transparent dress. I'm like, oh, so this is why she was cast for this moment to be like, see?

1:07:23Ronnie Karam: I'm good transparent. And she goes, maybe it's just Margot because he liked my transparent dress. Lottie's like, well, my dress tomorrow is transparent, so I guess we won't be friends. And they start laughing. And Missy's like, I'm the transparent queen. Yeah, cracking up. And this is why they can be friends and Margot can't, you know, because they're like, he's just being an idiot, you know. So Missy says, I mean, it's personal. He's not giving in. It doesn't make sense. Like, why doesn't he just talk to her? There's something behind it, I think. You guys need to have a conversation, Mark. It's like, I do not think that we need a conversation.

1:08:02Ben Mandelker: Just say nothing, then. Just say hi, hi, bye, bye. You know what I mean? Point taken. Thank you so much for that. Thank you. So I just think that it will be better that way. Fine. I'll temper my craziness.

1:08:14Ronnie Karam: By the way, you look marvelous, ravishing, fantastic, glorious.

1:08:20Ben Mandelker: No, I don't want you to temper your craziness. and you said well maybe i will

1:08:29Ronnie Karam: so um now lot is like i just don't like people being upset and crying is oh god if people are gonna cry over their underwear then they should wear different underwear he's not crying about

1:08:41Ben Mandelker: that she doesn't know that you've been making fun of her underwear yet micah is like they're like okay whatever is Mike is like by the way my underwear is loose right now is that bad etiquette

1:08:53Ronnie Karam: you see she's owning her underwear well that's how to do it it's like I think the elastic wore off so

1:09:02Ben Mandelker: what's my husband is it like your husband is your underwear leaving you

1:09:07Ronnie Karam: I'm sorry he slagged off it's different so everyone comes over except Martha and Margo So Margot's just like sitting over there with pouty face. And Emma's explaining the house and how it's open to the public. And anyone can just walk into the house. And Lottie's like, but with the stories of Kimmy falling down the stairs and rolling over everywhere. And Emma's like, that was right here. Actually, lots of people saw that. She's in a lot of family photos from that year.

1:09:36Ben Mandelker: Look, we put up a plaque. This is called the Kimmy rolling around down the stairs garden. in.

1:09:41Ronnie Karam: I remember being in bed once and a tour came through the room at midday. There was a family there taking pictures while the tour guide said, this is the tightest ass in all of England.

1:09:54Ben Mandelker: I remember that. I was on that tour. Oh, that was you, Lottie. So Emma is like, oh, yes, I've seen people in dressing gowns loads of time. You see me in the night night quite often. People recognize me and say nice things like, oh, thank you or something. and I have nice little interactions with visitors or they don't recognize me. And I'll just be like, the loo is that way.

1:10:18I don't know.

1:10:18Ben Mandelker: That's so funny to me, Emma, being like,

1:10:21Ronnie Karam: having tourists walk around. You're in your nightgown with some Ben and Jerry's in your hand. It's like, loo's that way. All right. So now Missy goes over to sit with Margo, who's refusing to join the group. And meanwhile, Kimmy's asking what happened. And she's like, why are chairs being pulled away from the main group? What's going on? And so at the other table, Missy's like, I spoke to him. He doesn't understand what he does, you know. And I think, you know, I said, you upset her. And he says, you know, you don't come to Longleat with a transparent dress that you can see your underwear. And I said, I wear transparent dresses.

1:10:58Ronnie Karam: Why are you reporting all of this? This is not the part you should be saying.

1:11:02Ben Mandelker: Yeah. And I said, you can't do that. Not acceptable. He's like, okay, I take your notes. I'm going to stop doing it. So it's like, I don't think he's understanding. He's actually doing it. And I was like, you actually like really upset her. And he was like, okay, fine. And I said, I always wear transparent dresses. And Marco's like, what are you talking about? Wait, so he's making fun of this dress? I mean, it's an Aaliyah. Aaliyah. Okay. He's a very important designer. Haven't you seen Clueless? Aaliyah. Aaliyah. That's what it was. I was like, Aaliyah doesn't sound right.

1:11:31Ronnie Karam: Cringe. I was just cringed. Haven't you seen Clueless? I was like, oh my God, I'm watching it, darling. So Marcus's like, okay, so it's fine for Emma to wear a crop top with her tummy out, which, by the way, she looks incredible. But, like, I'm not allowed to wear a sheer dress where you can see the shape of my figure. I mean, whatever. My dress is amazing. And Martha's like, your dress is amazing. You look incredible, darling. Come on. So Kimmy sees and is like, what's going on over there? Fireworks. Oh, it looks like a bitch fest to me.

1:12:01Ben Mandelker: Love that. So then Emma goes over to that table. she's like you all right she's like oh hi dog he's like yeah well we're just having some like very fucking very annoying conversations by the way margo you're the one who's whipped yourself into a frenzy about today there was nothing nothing happened today you are now you have made yourself but you put yourself on this island and there's been no there's been no conflict

1:12:24Ronnie Karam: well they kind of made her because they keep coming over and reporting but she is like you need to have my back and go talk to mark for me so they're talking to mark for her and reporting

1:12:33Ben Mandelker: back and then she gets mad so missy's like well we love mark he's our friend but he gives her a compliment and then he leaves and he says a really ugly thing about her and he's got to stop doing that you know it's like emma's like yeah he's not gonna stop so what's next now we have tea

1:12:51Ronnie Karam: have you considered that maybe that just makes him look bad so just maybe think about that you may put so much effort into taking care of everyone it's meant to be fun this isn't fun so back to Mark, he's like, oh we were having such a lovely time, we still are we still are having a lovely time

1:13:08Ben Mandelker: no it's divine it's divine, Mike is like, it is you're not part of this

1:13:12Ronnie Karam: okay sorry, you guys are so funny well I think her true self is coming up, that's what's happening Marty's like, well you two have been getting along well I didn't do anything, I actually didn't do anything tonight and now that she's being grunty, I just feel like I should join in

1:13:32Ben Mandelker: guys are we ever going to address my underwear situation isn't it crazy that the elastic broke oh be quiet micah so then back to margo's table emma's like i mean he's got this very kind properly genuine amazingly deep side but he doesn't tend to ever express that and i'm not defending anything that's made you upset but i do think you should just tell him so we can move on from this because I'm quite bored right now. Tell him how you feel.

1:13:58Ronnie Karam: And she's like, yeah, I'm going to get it on in person type of thing. Just go say something. I can't not say things. You should say things. And they're like, yeah, do it. Do it, Margot. Do it. And she goes, well, I'm more than happy to then. Fine. Everyone just wants to squash it. Okay, great. So now everyone can see that I'm not the person not squashing it. I'm up for squash.

1:14:18Ben Mandelker: So Emma goes back to Mark's table. She's like, well, she's just upset by your sense of humor I feel. It's like, well that's what I said. So Mark's like, oh, okay, no, Mark, Mark, I think you and Margo need to have a chat. And Kimmy's like, God! Oh God, I really don't think it's necessary. I'm very, very happy.

1:14:37Ronnie Karam: Mark, please go, just make peace. I mean, she's making a stink out of it, no offense. No, guys, please. I've never been happier. I'm not moving, but I adore you and I respect you. Well, I adore you too, but she's very hurt by things that you said. Oh, well, she'll get over it. And if she doesn't, I don't care. Not my problem.

1:14:58Ben Mandelker: Oh, my God, Mark. Well, if she's hurt about crushed velvet, she needs to find a new material that isn't transparent.

1:15:08Ronnie Karam: But also this whole thing of Margot just sitting at a table by herself, just like having someone sent for is ridiculous. Like, fine, you go get him and I'll talk to him. And it's like, will you go into the principal's office? Get over yourself, lady. And the table's not that far away either.

1:15:25Ben Mandelker: So Margo can hear everything. That's her special skill also. She's like, Mark, I can hear you. You're just being nasty. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Just nasty. Just nasty. That's all he's being.

1:15:39Ronnie Karam: He is, though. Well, I am nasty. Mark, just come over here and talk to her. She's like, yeah, come here, Mark. What's wrong? What are you scared of? Just come chat with me. He's like, darling, we were sitting right next to each other ten minutes ago.

1:15:54Ben Mandelker: Yeah, so come sit with me now, Mark. Come on, Mark. Mark, come on, please, Mark. He's like, no, there's no arguing at Longleat. There's no arguing at Longleat. Everyone is perfectly happy. Come on, Mark. Go on, Mark. Come on, dude.

1:16:07Ronnie Karam: Go talk to the Americans. Stop clapping your hands at me, please, darling. And don't shimmy either. Mark, come on. Everyone just wants us to have a chat. So it calms down. He's like, oh my god, this is so vulgar. I might have to leave. That's it. I'm going to go. I'm going back to the bath arms of all places. I'd rather be in a pub than be around you. I have to leave. I'm not going to turn this into a into a vulgar, vulgar day. Darling, relax. No, no, I'm going to go. Love you all. Please, demike me. Please.

1:16:43Ben Mandelker: marco he did nothing wrong well if i if he if i knew that he that that was all i had to do was just go talk to him to make him leave i would have gone talk to him a long time ago

1:16:55Ronnie Karam: i don't think that's fair that he has to leave you're screaming at him across the garden so why didn't he just come sit with me well why did he leave why did you leave this table and start screaming at him well i asked him to come talk to me oh well that's real bitches one of us That's what a bitchy of y 'all

1:17:13Ben Mandelker: I asked him to come to me and he left I wanted to give him the opportunity to come over here to talk Well, why don't you come over here? You left the table He doesn't want to talk It's fucking rude is what it is You're being a bitch

1:17:26Ronnie Karam: So she just gets up and follows Mark out You're a bitch She goes, well, you would know Oh, fucking crybaby, bitch Crybaby Change your diaper, bitch

1:17:38Ben Mandelker: You're the one who cries oh fuck off margo

1:17:44Ben Mandelker: you can see it was so great and but also like i personally not to get too deep about it but there was something about margo sitting at that table and being like what are you scared of what are you scared of mark i felt like i saw mark as a child there being bullied for being this gay little boy right like i not to bring i'm not trying to project anything as a gay man into this But I could see in that moment, like, I feel like I could see a window into his psychology. And, like, I totally understood why he was like, I'm leaving. Even though Mark is totally obnoxious, but funny obnoxious, as opposed to Margot, who's not funny obnoxious, although she's actually funny.

1:18:19Ben Mandelker: But the point is, I could totally see Mark having an internal spiral. And he's like, I cannot be seen showing emotion right now.

1:18:28Ronnie Karam: Must de-mic, de-mic. Well, I didn't see it as bullying any more than I see her stuff. Like when she's saying it's bullying. I don't really think it's bullying. I mean, I think he's being an asshole. He is being shady and he is saying mean things, you know, but she's also sitting over there talking behind his bed. They're children. They're acting like children. They are like children. I think it does. I think it does your own bullying in the clips we see where she's like, you're such a weirdo. Why do you talk like that? And you're like your dad left you and like he won't even talk to like a lot of that is like, yeah, that could be due to gay stuff.

1:18:59Ronnie Karam: Like so I think she does kind of veer towards there in the future. But so far, I just think she's an asshole. And I kind of like that. He's like, I'm not going to go over there and scream and fight with a woman. Like, I'm sorry, I'm not doing it. I know that you guys want me to on this show. And she clearly because clearly she wants to have a fight so she can be like, oh, my God, misogynist. He's such an asshole to me and do all this stuff. And he's not going to fall into the trap. And so I think, you know, good for him. But at the same time, if you don't want someone wanting to talk to you, then maybe stop like dissing them at the top of your lungs.

1:19:32Ronnie Karam: that's still team mark because i like him just like everybody else on this show i will choose his side because he's at least entertaining and margo's just cloying with this at this point

1:19:41Ben Mandelker: margo's annoying um but uh great show great show great episode thanks everyone for being here we hope you all have a wonderful weekend make sure you hop on that boat with ronnie because you guys are gonna have an amazing time and uh i can't wait to hear the stories when you get back on monday Should be good times A whole new week of podcasting

1:20:01Ronnie Karam: Alright we'll see you guys later Bye

1:20:28Ronnie Karam: She's a Daniella. Itchles. We never miss her call. It's Diane Call. Sunday in the Park with Dylan Clark. Big yay. It's Emily Gauthier.

1:20:37Ben Mandelker: Erin McNicholas. She don't miss no trick-a-less. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. I go, you go, we all go for Hugo. Jamie. She has no less namey.

1:20:47Ronnie Karam: Sips some scotch with Jessica Trotch.

1:20:49Ben Mandelker: She's not a McBee. She's a McBride. Jess McBride. She's our favorite streamer, Caroline Peacock.

1:20:55Ronnie Karam: Kristen the Piston Anderson. Que sera, sera, whatever we'll be, we'll Lauren Sillsby. She gets an A from us, it's Lindsay D. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino. Fresh as a daisy, it's Maisie McHenry.

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1:21:12Ronnie Karam: Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the Berg.

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1:21:18Ronnie Karam: I love a ya, Olivia Williamson.

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1:21:23Ronnie Karam: Yes we canna, it's Savannah. Anna.

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1:21:31Ronnie Karam: And our super premium sponsors. She's VVIP, it's Amanda V.

1:21:36Ben Mandelker: Can I have a Kavanaugh? It's Anna Kavanaugh. Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy MD.

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1:21:56Ben Mandelker: emily sides who what why where and gwen pentland nobody holds a candle to jamie kendall we got our wish it's jen plish my favorite murdo karen mcmurdo let's get savage with laura wildman in the study with a candlestick it's leslie peacock we're ride or die for lisa rider baron She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthy Always killing it, it's Lola Alkalani Roger that, it's Marlis Rogers

1:22:22Ronnie Karam: The incredible edible Matthews sisters She eases our woes, it's Melissa St. Rose She's the lady of the house, it's Rachel Sherouse There's a chance of meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud She's our princess, it's Rebecca Prince

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1:22:54Ronnie Karam: She ain't no shrinking Violet Kuchar. We love you guys.

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