#3441 (REWIND) RHOC S11E15 Shamrock and Shockwaves Rewind-Live in Dublin!

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2:12Ben Mandelker: Oh, a little bit of rabbit Who cares what happens when there's so much that happens Yeah! Hello! Hello, Dublin! Oh my god, Ireland! Wow. What a healthy bunch of lasses we've gotten here tonight. Wow. Gorgeous Ireland! Hello, thank you for being here. Thank you. Wow, it's a quote, shout on the door. Top of the morning to you. Top of the morning. Yeah, I hope you're ready for us to just wreck your language. And your phonics are a deep shit tonight. You guys, what a beautiful place. Wow. Walking around here, it's like when I was back in the womb. Everything is alcohol. Everything is alcohol. Yeah.

3:10does your breast milk come out like mine did I saw a Guinness truck I was like that's basically my mother's breast right there

3:19Ben Mandelker: yeah it is so cool to be here we've been on our like wild European tour and like every city has just like a different quality to it you know Sweden was very like hello we're on Sweden and then London was like very much like welcome to London and then here we walk out everyone's like what's going on Yes. Here people are like, nice ass. Can I do a line off of it? I'm like, cut over here. This is my people over here. Do you drink at your AA meetings? We are really excited. We're like, okay. Someone said we haven't got that. Did somebody say that? That shit's hilarious. We haven't got that. If we know there's going to be like one really good crowd, it's going to be a Dublin crowd.

4:05Ben Mandelker: Am I right? Yes. Yes. You guys were like, with the opening music, you guys were like clapping along and whistling and everything. I was like, are there keg stands happening out there? These are my people. We went to the gay area. I mean, on accident. No offense. But it wasn't like gay time yet. I still did end up with sploogs on my ankle somehow. I can prove it to you. But I went there to find water, and it was like the gay area, which was lovely, you know. Gay guys with face tattoos. It's like, I love this town. These are my people. I mean, it's time for me to do my customary thing, which is, of course, to apologize for deeply bastardizing your accent so many times on our podcast.

4:47Ben Mandelker: They're used to it. I apologize. It's not like these people just walked in off the street, all right? Yeah. No, but we're having such a fun time here. And, like, we only got here, we only arrived this afternoon. So, like, we still have a whole bunch of Dublin to see and experience. We had some boxedies. Yeah. Who came up with that shit? That's amazing. Is there a Boxty Museum? I saw that there's a Leprechaun Museum. You guys really need to memorialize the Boxtys. The potato pancake. There was an actual pancake made of potato. Yeah, it was really good. They're like, I'm talking about something totally normal to you.

5:26We're like, this is amazing. I'm moving here.

5:29Ben Mandelker: It was delicious. We had a really great lunch. What was the name of the place? Boxtys. Boxtys. We're very simple people. We like labels on everything. We went to boxies. We need to know exactly what we're getting wherever we're going. Ben, I'm in the Splooch neighborhood getting some water. Where are you? Yeah, so we're really excited. And honestly, we're very excited that we get to recap one of the best Real Housewives episodes of all time, which is Real Housewives of Orange County. Saying hi to Jason down there. Our friend Jason's down there. Oh, Jason. Hi, Jason. We love you, Jason. Hi. Jason, hi.

6:10Jason. That's Jason, everybody. Don't forget to give him a big hug. He loves having his butt grabbed a little bit. He's like, stop it.

6:19Ben Mandelker: Anyway, one of the best Real Housewives of all time is Orange County going to Dublin. I mean, New Jersey went, and that was good, too. But this episode of Orange County going back there, like revisiting it. I don't know how you guys felt about it, but I was like, I am feeling like adrenaline coursing through my veins right now. Were you guys offended when Orange County came here and just kind of like, you weren't? I don't know. I never know. I never know. I love you guys. I feel like we're wrecking balls. You know what I mean?

6:54Ben Mandelker: I love it. Everyone's like, bring it on. Yeah. Because even as Americans, when housewives come to our city, we're like, ew, disgusting! I heard housewives were shooting down the street. You know, we've all got pictures. We're like, girl, I saw him. You know, but we all act very outraged morally. Like, what are they doing to our city? I know. People always get really upset. They're like, they do not represent our region. but when they say it they're like they do not represent our region i know we are not like that at all and i'm like your face is stretched like a butthole what are you talking about you yeah it happens a lot with new jersey actually the irony is i put so much tretinoan on my eyes the other day that i just almost ripped off my eyelids.

7:47It's called hypocrisy. Get on the train! God damn, that really hurts. Be careful with that, Steph. You know when people call you thin-skinned, I'm literally thin-skinned. I'm going to wipe my face one day and it's just going to come off. And it'll be worth it. It'll be ounces lost, I say. What a visual.

8:10Ben Mandelker: It's like we're watching V. Hey, I'm a podcaster, alright? It's very rare that you actually have to look at my ass. Okay, here we are.

8:21We're here for the art. So let's get into that. We're in a real theater here. So previously on The Real Housewives of Orange County. Orange County. Vicky! Why did you help your boyfriend lie about having cancer?

8:45Ben Mandelker: I just wanted people to give me a casserole But now I have Steve Lodge And we're going to be together forever You cannot fake diseases, Vicky I have suffered from emotional debris Being lodged up my anal canal Disease is no joke Hey guys, it's Megan King-Edmonds I'm pregnant with Jim's child Wow, congratulations Thanks so much Jim and I are going to be together forever

9:24Ben Mandelker: Welcome, welcome to the show Don't be sorry Actually we love them, they've come see us in New York a few times You guys are hot Is that not amazing? I'm so sorry, we don't want to embarrass you No, go ahead, but just so you know They're swingers, swingers Both of them No, we love them It's all good If you're confused about what to order Spit roast Delicious, this couple loves it Okay, so Megan Hey guys, this is my new friend New housewife, Kelly Dodd Hi, I'm Kelly Dodd Hello I'm television's Heather Dubrow You're a conch Is what you are You can't call me that. I'm rich. Hey, guys, who wants to go to Glamis and do some jean puggies?

10:18I'll drive. Don't worry. It's totally safe, bitch.

10:21Ben Mandelker: You don't even know at home? It's going to be so fun. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. My neck. My neck. My neck. My neck. Beep. Beep. Beep. No one's coming to visit me at the hospital? All I wanted was a casserole. Oh, David, this vow renewal really means the world to me. It's evident that we're going to be together forever. I can't wait to see what vows you've written. David? David? Yes, dear. Are you just eating potato chips for your vow?

11:09Ben Mandelker: I, you know I'm on a diet, David, and chips are very triggering for me. David? David? David? I'm having 30 to 40 negative thoughts right now, David. Pansy. Pansy. It was funny, like, when we were preparing the previous leads, going over all the things that happened in this season of Orange County, Like, this was literally the season that they went on a dune buggy and tumbled over in the desert and almost all died. And that was before they even came to Ireland. It's amazing. This season is why people should sue Bravo. You know what I mean? This is the reality reckoning season. This is when they should have been like, those motherfuckers put us on dune buggies with Tamra driving.

12:04This season plied everyone with alcohol. This season brought the world Kelly Dodd. Kelly Dodd was a great housewife. She really crashed and burned there in the end. My advice is just generally don't marry somebody from Fox News. Otherwise, great work. Really great. Great work. I was shocked. I watched this episode and then we were looking at what happened this season to refresh ourselves. And it said Kelly Dodd is introduced to the cast. And I was like, oh, my God. She's like the pandemic. It changed everything. It did. We don't even understand how much this woman changed our lives.

12:41Ben Mandelker: This was part of a great three-year run on Orange County where the first year they introduced Shannon Bedore. The second year was Megan King Edmund's first and good season. It was the cancer season, and then she flopped. And then you had Kelly Dodd. I mean, this three years, I feel like sometimes we just don't appreciate what we have. Am I right? Until it's gone. Now we've got Gina. one day we're gonna appreciate gina too it's gonna be a long time be a long time for me all right well let's get into the taglines that started off this episode okay okay so we start with me nice try he looked at me to start with megan now you can take it no actually so the megan one was the best for me because megan so you know they say their taglines and we see what's going on in their life.

13:32Ben Mandelker: So Megan goes, in the game of life, I choose my team wisely. And it's her cozying up to Jim Edmonds. Future ex-husband Jim Edmonds. Well, it's okay. I choose my second team wisely. And then third team. And then fourth team. So then is, if at first you don't succeed,

14:02Try it my way.

14:07I don't throw parties. I am the party. My faith is strong. And my ass isn't bad either, bitch.

14:19Ben Mandelker: By the way, those two things have nothing to do with each other. Who has ever talked about, like, oh, my God, my connection to God is so strong. Also, my ass is looking great these days. Do what Jesus did. Squats, bitch. I forgot that Tamara's whole thing was... And I remember saying it the first second she pulled this shit out. Because you're not supposed to make fun of people when they're like, I found the Lord. You're not allowed to trip them.

14:51Take money out of the hat that they're passing and pocket it. Call them fat. You're not supposed to do that stuff anymore. Ma, things have really changed. But yeah, when she pulled that, I was like, Satan. This is what Satan does. You know? He makes himself uncriticizable by calling himself a critic. And now look at Tamara. You think that shit lasted? No. But I forgot how dedicated she really was to this. She really, I mean, even this whole episode, she's like, you know what we should do? Forgive each other.

15:22Ben Mandelker: She got baptized in a pool in, like, Vicky's backyard, under the grotto or something. the most spiritual place on earth. So, Shannon... The same episode where Vicky was like, how can everybody treat me like this? Everybody's nethering me to the cross like Jesus fucking Christ!

15:44Ben Mandelker: Shannon. Huh. Imagine if that was it. Huh.

15:52Ben Mandelker: Karma's a bitch, so I don't have to be one. Huh. I don't have to be a bitch because I'm so happy. I'm very happy right now. Happy. It was just David doing the family thing behind her. David and I are in a secure relationship. Nothing could ever go wrong. Before you judge me, you better be perfect. What kind of rule is that? No one would be able to judge anybody. What, are we just taking away hobbies now? Fuck out of here. So the episode begins with everyone packing because they're going to go on this trip and everything. And Heather's in her bedroom. Heather, of course, starts to sew Heather. She's like, oh, my God.

16:37Ben Mandelker: This is an umbrella. Oh, my God, Heather. Her assistant. But look, I bought a little Louis Vuitton bag for the umbrella. Heather, LV. Oh, my God. You put the umbrella. No way. Wait for it. Wait, oh, my God. Hold on. in its own bag. No! And then you have a bag with an umbrella and you hold it on your shoulder. No! It's amazing. Bro! Oh my God! What an honor to be a woman of the people. Oh! That assistant, what an ass licker that girl was. I will never forget her. Do you remember when Heather would walk into the room with her purse, you know, her like$100 ,000 purse? She would hold her hand like this and then her purse would drape off of it like that.

17:24And she'd walk like a waiter is holding a tray. She'd be like, hello, it's me. I'm rich. And then her assistant would walk in with her slightly smaller borrowed purse the exact same way and walk exactly like Heather right behind her. So funny. And then she became her podcast co-host and then we never heard from her again. Something happened. She's locked in the basement somewhere with Richard Marks. She tried to keep a purse. You know her ass tried to keep a purse.

17:51Ben Mandelker: If you ever take a purse from me again, this will cost you a lot. So then we see Kelly. Kelly is just picking out clothes, and she's talking to Michael. And Michael, her ex-husband, her future ex-husband. Spoiler alert. Literally, any time you see a male on their show, you know they're going to leave someone. I was surprised with Kelly and Michael, though. I really was. I think that two train wrecks should stay together. Like if you find someone as drunk and messy as you stay with them. He was a mess. We did meet Kelly and Michael years ago. Some of you may know this. We went over to their house.

18:34Ben Mandelker: This was before we realized the true I should have known she was satanic. We tell you this house. Michael was wasted and just spilled a drink all over my lap. So when watching this scene back again or this whole thing, it's like, Michael's wasted all the time. I was like, yes, he actually is. I can confirm. Yeah, but so is she. It's like pot, kettle, you know what I mean? Calling the kettle drunk or whatever. Pot calling the kettle one. Ha, get it? That's funny. But yeah, I should have known she was satanic. That house was like five stories. And she was like, hi guys, welcome! Hold on, I'm not going to come down to get you because I'm just busy in my room, but come out to my room.

19:12And we're like, okay. And it's like, buzz in. It's like, go upstairs to get in the front door. and then go in the front door and it stares. And then go up the stairs to get to the living room. And then go up to the, we're like, where is she? And then you hear on the intercom, no, my room, my room is upstairs. I was like, how many floors is this? And I was like 150 pounds bigger. I was like, bitch, it's the beach, that's how we live. I was like, I'm a mole person, come downstairs.

19:39Ben Mandelker: Wasn't there an episode this season where Vicky gets caught in the elevator in Kelly's house? And we're like, ha, ha, ha, ha. You need that elevator. You need it. You're in that elevator for like 10 minutes just to get to the living room. And Kelly, there was a rerun of Orange County playing on the TV in the kitchen. And Kelly sat down on a stool in the kitchen. It was like, so guys, tell me what you did today. And then she literally put her face in her hands and watched the episode like a little kid smiling from ear to ear. Like every time she came on, she's like, mm-hmm. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. It was so cute.

20:14It was actually kind of cute.

20:16Ben Mandelker: It was great. So anyway, so Michael's helping her and Michael's giving her chips. Michael's like, oh, Temple Bar's fun. People are amazing. And you know, the Irish people are just salt of the earth. They'll love you. Did you guys love Kelly Dodd, by the way? Yes, that's not a compliment. Was she accepted? You know what else is the salt of the earth? Salt. What kind of thing is that to say? It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappens commercial.

20:48So then Megan's on the phone with Jim, and she's like, Hey, what's going on, Jim? He's like, Hey. You look pretty. Thanks. I'm packing for Ireland.

21:03Ben Mandelker: Nice. All I have is a few pair of pants. They have elastic in them. Send me lots of pictures. Okay.

21:21Ben Mandelker: Guess what? Guess what? What? I just charged my phone. That's hot. But it's already down to 75%. I told you to watch it, but... It's fucking hot. That's all that matters, man. We have so much chemistry So Michael What did you think of Heather's party And Michael's like yeah it was fun And she's like yeah they're such a great couple I goes yeah they're great It was really great hanging out with them And she's like yeah I think that he treats her well He's like really nice to his wife

22:06Ben Mandelker: Yeah I'm sure the feeling's mutual You know I'm really at a crossroads with my marriage And this trip is really coming at a perfect time I can't wait to blow off some steam in the party. Oh, party. Michael, you need to stop getting so hammered, dude. You're just like hammered. Who does that? I can't even go anywhere with you because you're hammered all the time. What the fuck, man? They got to a footage of Michael at a party just like dropping glass everywhere. These two were such a disaster. But also, wasn't she hammered at that party? She's always hammered too. So he's like, all right, I got the point.

22:43So then we go to Vicky's house, packing with Brianna before she went cray-cray-cuckoo. Birds of a feather. Do not date crazy people who are into essential oils. I'm so sorry if one of you were them. Not you. I know that's big. But she went so crazy. She won't eat anything now. She won't eat almonds. What's the thing? Seed oil. Seed oil. I want some seed oil. What am I supposed to eat? Cat oil? Give me some seed oil. What the fuck else are you going to make it out of? Grass? Give me my seed oil.

23:13Ben Mandelker: Such a random choice to be like, that's where I draw the line. She's like, my family's healthy. All we eat are animal guts now. Raw. Give those kids a juice box. You don't believe in corn syrup? What has happened to you? So Brianna's like, oh, hey, Mom. So what's going on here? Look, there's shoes on the floor. Oh, those shoes that I accidentally left there for the camera? For America's sexiest bachelor, Steve Lodge?

23:48Please, stop trying to make me look desirable on television. I cannot deal with that, Brianna.

23:54Ben Mandelker: I mean, is it so wrong that I'm the lucky woman in America who got to have Steve Lodge's shoes in her bedroom? Oops, didn't mean to show everyone that. And Brianna's like, Steve and my mom are moving a little fast. but he's amazing. I mean, I don't think he's pretended to have cancer yet, so... That's a win. Speaking of chemistry, we then go over to Tamara and Eddie at home. Yes, guess what? I had a talk today, and guess what? Mia, my trainer, said you're not allowed to drink in Ireland. Nothing, nothing in Ireland, bitch. Yeah. I know. It's going to be tough because they drink a lot over there.

24:45Ben Mandelker: But guess what? Heather said she'll work out with me, so I have a workout partner. Could you imagine working out with Heather Dubrow? God, how do you think it sounds? Okay. Hello. Heather! This is television's Heather Dubrow. It really is. It's not an imitation. That's her. The following is a demonstration on physical fitness. Oh my God, so good. We put our hand up and we put it to the left and then we raise it up. You're the other, yes! And your tricep is now magnificent. Mother, you are mother! You are mother! I learned this from Reba McEntire when we filmed Hot in Cleveland together in Malibu country.

25:33Ben Mandelker: Thank you so much for this demonstration. Who's Reba McEntire? and why was she so lucky to work with Heather Dubrow? Am I right, everyone? It's true. You're all welcome.

25:46Ben Mandelker: If you look under your seats, you will find a coupon to my future endeavor, HGTV with Heather Dubrow. So Tamar's like, we're so romantic. I can't wait to not drink without you, Eddie. He's like, did you just fart right now? She's like, yeah, I just farted. Heather, I mean, Tamra the trashiest ass on this show. I love it. No matter what episode we pick, it's always Tamra being some trash. Every single one. Every time. So now the women all go to LAX. Because, by the way, this trip is the, you know, every Real Housewives trip, they always have some ridiculous bullshit reason why they're going to whatever country they're going to.

26:24Ben Mandelker: So this one is that Megan King-Edmonds is like, oh, by the way, I'm Irish. I'm an O'Toole. By the way, are any of you here an O'Toole? We have a real O'Toole. Are you an O'Toole? We have an O'Toole. We did in two seconds what Megan King Edmund couldn't do in seasons. Are you related to Megan King Edmunds?

26:57Ben Mandelker: She says no. She says no, she's not. She says fuck her. so uh so they arrived yeah you guys it's so crazy I found out I'm Irish and I found out my family is named O'Toole and there's like a lot of O'Toole's we should all fly to Ireland does anybody here not here but like does anybody in that friend group even like Megan King she's like all I want is to have a baby and they're like, you shouldn't do that. That's not for you. So I don't know why Megan didn't last beyond the season, but she arrives at LAX and says, I have a little nausea today. Everyone's like, great.

27:49Ben Mandelker: Heather goes, I love your attitude. I had a little nausea today. That's good, that's good. Okay, I'm going to work with that in my next scene. Okay, actress. I am Megan. I have nausea. Thank you. That was acting. Thank you so much. I pay people to have my nausea. But you do you. We're building a nausea room in the new mansion. Okay, everybody's here. Let's go. Just kidding. Shed is not here. Just kidding, guys. Just kidding. Because this is every season of Orange County. The three. Tamara, Vicky, and Shant. They're always fighting with each other in some way. One of them is always fighting. And right now it's Shannon fighting with Vicky because Vicky's boyfriend lied about cancer and Vicky helped him but denied helping him.

28:35And Shannon's very morally above lying about cancer. Most people are, I would say. Most of us are. Most of us are. That's fair. But I feel like how long are we going to hold on to that, you know? I lied about a little cancer. Who doesn't lie?

28:49Ben Mandelker: We've got a show TV show, you know? So Shannon's like, well, I am really looking forward to going to Ireland. I mean, I'm Irish. My name's Shannon. It doesn't get more Irish than that. We're flying to the Shannon Airport. Huh? Oh, I hope Shannon Airport has a better airport husband than I do. But whatever. I'm happy. So, of course, they're coming here via Ethiopian Airlines, as you do. That makes sense. That makes sense. As you do. It's also the first time I think all of them had heard of Ethiopia. Like the idea of Ethiopia entering Tamara's brain. Ethiopia, bitch. What's that? First of all, can I have a waiter without a lisp?

29:33And second of all, please stop telling me what to eat. Okay? But I love that they don't pretend to be smart on this show. Because most shows are like, oh, Ethiopia. Mm-hmm.

29:46Second honeymoon choice. You know? People lie. But on this show, they're like, what? What the fuck is that? Ethiopia.

30:02Ben Mandelker: So they get on Ethiopian Airlines, and they arrive in Dublin here. And so they get out of the airport, and they get to their driver, Sean. And Sean's like, how are you? My name's Sean, welcome. And then Kelly's like, how do you say Top of the Morning? He goes, uh, Top of the Morning. morning morning morning morning morning morning morning

30:38he's like it's just morning so now they're driving through the countryside in a splinter van and megan's like oh my god Look at this so cute. Oh, it's my memories. Hold on.

30:55I Had grass too. I grew up around a lot of white people too. This is crazy

31:02Ben Mandelker: This is so cute. It's almost as cute as my nausea Okay, everyone listen now we're gonna go over 40 Irish sayings Donde esta el bathroom?

31:21Ben Mandelker: A whale of a time.

31:28Wait, let's role play. Let's role play. You be Reba McIntyre and I'll be Heather Dubrow.

31:36Ben Mandelker: Hi, Heather Dubrow. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Have we met? Yes, I'm a famous country music artist. Oh, music. This is artistry, so any acting? Well, I'm trying to act now, but I can't act as good as you, Heather DeBrow. Oh, stop it. Yes, I'll sign your breath. I'll sign your breath. Oh, here's another expression. Hooli-kicking. Tamara goes, help me. Yes, Hooli How do you spell Hooli? What's Hooli kicking? What's Hooli, bitch? What's Hooli? Which is, by the way, also me I'm like, what is Hooli? Oh, this is official It's not a thing Oh, it's not a thing? Hooli kicking Let's have a Hooli kicking night Hi, Hooli kicking Top of the Hooli kicking night to ya Top of the Hooli kicking night to ya I'm at the Hooli kicking airport Hooli kicking Hooli kicking We took the Hooli kicking airlines to get here

32:45Guys, where we're staying The Powers Court Hotel The O'Toole family runs it

32:56Ben Mandelker: Back in the day it was called The O'Toole Days Inn That's really cool I don't know where the Shannons are Probably in a pub

33:08Let's hooli-kicking it How's that for hooli-kicking? It's a hooli whale of a shanning time

33:18Ben Mandelker: So they all arrive at this hotel It's like this nice hotel Is it a famous hotel? Okay, everyone's like yes It's big I was like, I hope we don't stay there I don't see any fast food signs I need a hotel that's like There's a McDonald's down there Or not a McDonald's You know, Box T's is fine I just need food Either way, it's enormous. It looks like a museum, and I'm already embarrassed as an American that we're sending these people as our ambassadors to this place. Here's the problem, Ben. As an American, you have the right not to be embarrassed about shit. That's the whole point. You're not American enough.

33:52I sure brought a film finger. You're supposed to be like, I don't know your language, and I ain't gonna.

33:57Ben Mandelker: Where's the fucking bathroom?

34:05Ben Mandelker: So the hotel manager comes out and he's like, oh, on behalf of the entire team of the Power Scots Hotel, I'd like to extend a thousand, a hundred thousand welcomes or Cade Miller Fauci. Cade Miller Fauci. So which leads to Shannon saying, Cade Miller Fauci. Cade Miller Fauci. Camilla, Camilla, Camilla Cabella Fauci. Come on, Camilla Parker Bowles Fauci. I don't know what I'm saying. We've asked our bartender to create a signature drink for you. Cyanide. Please, all of you. You fucking bitches. I've had two minutes of you and I want to die. I'll do it with you. Let's do it. Is this from Ethiopia?

34:55Ben Mandelker: Then Heather goes, let's have a well of a time. I am fun.

35:02I am fun. This is so different than last year's trip. We went to Moreau. We were created with swinging balls.

35:14Ben Mandelker: Flashback to a year ago. A year ago. Are those balls? It could have also been like a day ago. So the hotel staff is like, okay, well, we've given you the presidential suite because we've decided to destroy this hotel. Mom, mom, mom, mom. Please, please don't go upstairs yet. I have some flowers that have been delivered for you. And only for you, ma 'am. Only for you. Oh my god, flowers? Are these from Brianna? What? What? Who? Oh no, they're from the sexiest man of America, Steve Lodge. They say, whoa, have a nice trip. I love you. Have you seen my shoes? I can't find them. Steve. The guy's just mouthing the words.

36:08He's like, please, have you found my shoes, Steve? Nailed it. Nailed it.

36:16Ben Mandelker: So Tamara's like, oh my God, you guys have had 10 dates. This is ridiculous, bitch. So they're like, he said the L word. He said the L word. With Vicky, it's leave. You know it is. When that L word comes, it comes with a piece of paper that's like, leave me alone or go to prison. So then the staff is like, so by the way, the first floor is our spa. It's open from seven in the morning. And Kelly's like, what did you call it? What? Was that Spanish? He's like, the spa. What? Huh? No, something with a C. You said something with a C. First floor? First floor is it! Oh, me accent. Me lucky charms. He's like, press one for English, am I right?

37:07Die. He's just like, die. Die. So they all go to their rooms, and Shannon just has the best Shannon way of doing really anything. And on this one, she showed up. She's like, I'm not miserable at all. I'm having a very good time. The miserable one is Vicky, so I'm fun, Shannon, and everything I do is fun. She's like manic fun Shannon. So she gets into her room and she goes, What? What? Wow! What? It's like Hillary Clinton when she pretended that she was surprised when balloons fell from the ceiling. She's like, What? What?

37:42Ben Mandelker: Wow! What a room! Whoa! Look at this! Are you kidding me? Aren't you? This is, I mean, the most beautiful suite, and I'm sure around the corner I'll find the flowers from David. Oh, well, they're not in this room. Let's see if they're over here. No? Okay. I mean, we just renewed our wedding vow, so surely there's a bouquet. I'm sure just one moment. They're, well, not under the bed. Oh, of course, they're in the closet. They're in the closet. I'm, okay, they're, okay, hold on. Here they are. Huh, wow, just some empty hangers. Okay. No, no, no, no, Shannon. Oh, yes, other Shannon, yes. There it is.

38:20Kettle chips. Kettle chips.

38:22Ben Mandelker: Those are his flowers. Those are his flowers. We're going to arrange them like pedals and say, he loves me, he loves me not. I am on a diet. He loves me not. I'm on a diet, I'm on a diet not, I'm on a diet. So meanwhile, in the other room, the staff, the guy is showing Kelly the balcony, and she's like, oh, this is pretty cool. I'm going to have a party out here. Hey, what goes before part B? Party! Party! He's like That was actually good That was actually good I'll give you that Finally someone gets my jokes around here You want to get married? Do you get wasted? Hey, how do you say married in Irish?

39:09Married, married What?

39:12Ben Mandelker: I understand you Alright, so Megan Announced this to everyone Tomorrow we're going to be going to Dublin and I've been talking to a genealogist so I'm going to have to meet the genealogist and then we're going to go over everything together. Is that like when you find out where your blue jeans came from? They're like, great, thanks Megan. We just want to get shit-faced. You know what I want to do? I want to whoop it up. That's what I want to do. Whoop, whoop, whoop. I want to whoop it up. Anybody here going to whoop it up? How do I say that? Irish. Can you whoop it up? You want to whoop it up?

39:54Let's whoop it up. Come on. About the button. About the button. Let's whoop it up. Want to whoop it up here? Whoop it up? Whoop it up here? Where do you want to whoop it up? Whoop it up here? Why then? Let's whoop it up.

40:05Ben Mandelker: And then Shannon goes, Can I tell everyone what I would like to find in Ireland? A leprechaun. And then it just cuts the commercial. Bravo's like, We're out.

40:20Guys, let's make like jelly and roll

40:23Ben Mandelker: Why is jelly roll Why do we go for jelly roll for that one? Of all the things that roll We're going to say Let's make like jelly and roll Aren't there better things like a wheel? I guess jelly is the one Never mind That's the one, I think so Top of the morning Top of the morning, Lobby Hi, Lobby Top of the morning Anybody want some kettle crisps? I can't have these in my room Anybody? not coming on to you, I promise. Well, guess what? Since I'm hilarious Heather Dubrow, I have my Irish accent spray because I know how badly you all want to have accents because I know not all of you studied acting at Syracuse University.

41:03Ben Mandelker: Fun fact, I played Into the Woods, all the roles in the attic of my sorority house. All right, give me some of the spray. I want to try. Top of the morning, dream! All right, let me see if it works on me. Top of the morning to you. Wow, it's so accurate. That was close. You're welcome. You're welcome. Commercials. Here comes one right now.

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43:01Ben Mandelker: Now available in Canada, too. That's quince.com slash crappens for free shipping and 365-day returns. Quince.com slash crappens. So Temple Bar Square, let's do this. Top of the morning. Can someone wake Megan up? And then you see her now and she's still like that. It's so funny. Jeff Lewis will be like, hey, it's Megan King Edmunds. Megan King, so great to see you. She's like, so good to be here.

43:40Ben Mandelker: Even though I'm pregnant and can't drink, because by the way, I'm pregnant, I want the girls to have the full Irish experience, so I planned a pub crawl for everyone to go out and get drunk. And while they're drinking, I'm going to meet with a genealogist. Like, we know. Go. We know. Go. Just go. Just go. Go. So then meanwhile, in the sprinter van. I just farted. Tamara. Tamara, don't be crude in front of Steve Blodger's shoes. So now they're finally, they've arrived here in town. They're walking around. They're just being as offensive as possible, which I'm sure you see walking up Temple Bar.

44:19Did you say up Temple Bar? Walking through Temple Bar?

44:23Ben Mandelker: Making their way downtown. You see, we saw it today. So they literally stop on the corner, this entire cast. That's an Irish jig. They start doing a river dance. Like, oh, okay, here we're doing, I'm doing it. I'm doing it. Oh my God, my feet don't stop. Tap of the morning. Tap of the morning. So then they go to the Norseman and Heather walks into this bar and she's like, cute. This is cute. Look at all the poor people drinking their poor drinks. So is this like a recruitment carnival? I can find my new butler here. I want a drink. What's good for pregnant people? Lady, if you don't know at this point, you're in trouble.

45:20He's like, water. What was that? No, with the C. With the C. What was that you just said? What did you say? How do you say that? How do you say water in Irish? Oh, hold on. Hold on. Hold on. I've got a surprise for everybody. Button, button, button. Do, do, do, do, do. I'm a leprechaun. I am a leprechaun right now. That is hilarious. Green sequins.

45:43Ben Mandelker: Does it get funnier than green sequins? Oh, God, here lies Shannon Medore, killed by her own sequins. And you know, it's a Tamra loving Shannon season because she's like, Live at the Shannons. She always dresses the pot. Because if this were another season, she'd be like, Fucking Shannon, I was in a fucking costume, dumb bitch.

46:08Ben Mandelker: So they're all drinking and everything. and Kelly's saying how like, you know, she's had a rocky past with all the entire cast, essentially. But she's like, you know what? No, there's no better place to have fun and let bygones be bygones than an Irish pub where she can get wasted and insult them all. Yeah, this is going to go great. I just don't know why everyone's so offended, bunch of pussies. Hey, what's the slang for when you're having a good time and you're pregnant? It's called having a crack So Kelly's getting cracked No, she's having a crack Kelly's having crack Like a butt crack You know what the bartender is like I quit, I quit I'm leaving Hey ladies The stock in cyanide went so far up During this episode Everybody's ordering it This part was important though Ladies, I've got to go meet the genealogist

47:11Ben Mandelker: so hold on let me get a drink that's good for pregnant ladies before i go to the genealogists that genealogist probably quit could you could you imagine like having to deal with the people who came after megan oh hello there i just wanted to know that have you found any old tools we did uh this one wandered around a lot asking people if they were O'Tools announcing that she was going to go to a genealogist trying to force people to have babies with her didn't really work out sorry that was an oof, that was bad but she did have to, remember? she was like, Jim, want to have a baby? no Jim, we need to have a baby or I'm leaving you I don't care, go Jim, please have a baby no, gross Jim, please ew Jim, you're like a booger I would never have a baby with you Jim I'm having a baby.

48:04Okay, fine. Get off my ass. I'm having a baby. I can't wait. Jim's so excited.

48:08Ben Mandelker: I know. Well, Megan's going to meet with a, I don't know, genealogist, gynecologist, rheumatologist, Ethiopia. I don't even know. We're going to get drunk. So they start drinking. And they start really drinking a lot. They're really going in. So it's fun. I mean, like, you know, Vicky's feeding Tamara all these shots. She's like, I bet you. I bet you I got up in this competition, bet you. they're doing shot after shot clapping their butt cheeks and you know that pee is going to start flowing soon because this cast in New York will just pee all over everything they don't even care they get wasted and they go pee on things they're having a great time it's fun to watch, I'm having fun for them this is fun, this is the best part of Orange County when they are just getting shit faced and having a good time and it's so fun I couldn't even believe we could have even more fun when we then went to Megan King Edmonds at the genealogist okay so the family tree that you gave me that was your uncle's let's go over that yeah

49:15my uncle made this tree and I have it printed out I've been doing some of my own research and I found some things that I'm interested am I related to you two

49:30Ben Mandelker: she says I've always been really connected to my Irish heritage, so I'm trying to figure out where does my Irish pride come from? It's your Irish heritage!

49:42Ben Mandelker: Where else? I never really understood the pride inside of me until I found out it was Irish pride. What is that? Fucking Megan. So, um, you're related basically to everyone in the valley. All right, everyone you're related to here, you owe me a dollar. All right? You know, if you go down to Greystones, which is only about five miles away from here, just walk off a cliff into the water. You can just tap any of the fish down there and there's probably no tool. It makes me think of grey rocking, which is what Ariana does, you know, because she's like traumatized on Vanderpump Rules, and she's like, I just like grey rock my perps.

50:25That's like how I get over the trauma of it. And she really is doing it throughout the reunion. Everyone's trying to get her. I looked it up, and it literally means turning yourself into a gray rock so people stop paying attention to you.

50:38Ben Mandelker: Except for Megan King-Edmonds. Are you an O'Toole? Hey, gray rock, are you an O'Toole?

50:47Ben Mandelker: Are you an O'Toole? Boundaries. Are you an O'Toole? Boundaries. So Megan says, it's crazy to think I could be related to the majority of this town. That would never happen in the OC. I'm like, have you watched the OC? You've got John Jansen fucking Chan and then going to Alexis Bellino who was the Jim Bellinos. They're all fucking in Orange County. You're all related down there. There's a lot of reproducing in the OC too. There's babies everywhere crawling out of windows over there. There's boats passing by with just babies like wah, wah. You're related to somebody. Also, have you noticed that every piece of gossip that comes out about that Megan King Edmonds is like, it doesn't matter what the gossip is or where it is or what part of the world.

51:28Ben Mandelker: It's always like, and this person, who's related to Megan King Edmonds, she pops up everywhere. She literally got married to the President of the United States' nephew. How does that even happen if you're in a real house of Orange County? She's everywhere. I don't know. He seemed like a real keeper too. That was weird. It was a forever couple. So, Tamara's like, by the way, my buzz is wearing off. But guess what's not wearing off? Farts! Ha ha ha ha ha ha, bitch! So then, just when it seemed like everyone was getting along, a crack, and not a crack like a crack, but a crack. A crack in the foundation.

52:03Ben Mandelker: Well, Kelly just came up to me, and this is what she did. She flicked my nose. She flicked my nose. I didn't like that. The slow-mo reenactment. The finger. The finger came up like a plane leaving the Shannon airport, hit my nose, sent it up to the air as if I were sniffing biscuits, and then left. It was horrifying. Just falling down stories. You just see stories of Earth passing. It's like the hallway in Inception, just rotating. And Kelly just like...

52:58Wow, hi. I don't like that. She flicked my nose. Oh, yeah, she's into those jokey things. I don't like that.

53:06Ben Mandelker: I don't enjoy things that make people laugh. Stella and Adelie played the nose flick game when they were six years old. I require maturity. Ma 'am, you were just clapping your butt cheeks. You're wearing a green sequined shirt and yelling atop of the morning to you. and Tamara has farted on four busboys. Can we not? Hey, do you guys have any bangers and mash? Well, that's what Steve and I call it late at night. I love those. All right, we're going to do four shots. Okay, we're going to whoop it. Let's whoop it right now. Top of the morning to you. Top of the morning. Top of the morning. So back to John the Genealogist.

53:48He's like...

53:54Ben Mandelker: So, your direct ancestor, Philem O'Toole, he rebelled against the English who came in and took the lands of the O'Toole's, and he was executed. Megan goes, that's incredible. That's amazing. He's like, yeah. I mean, to think, my great, great, great, however, whatever, greater, grandfather, He was a rebel and a successful rebel. He's like, yeah. Did you hear the last part of the story there? Until he was executed, but still so successful. The guy's like, yeah.

54:38Ben Mandelker: That's amazing. Wow. He had his head chopped off. I'm so honored. All right. We've found Patrick O'Toole. Patrick was a chubby boy. and while he walked through the holes at school, he was pushed into lockers. Whoa, that is amazing. Wow, I love someone who can just see something differently, like a whole bedroom in a locker. That's just an innovator right there. Love someone who studies so much. So back to the ladies. Heather's like, girls, we've got a real hoolie kicking off here.

55:17Ben Mandelker: so Vicky's like hey hey bartender hey hooli kicker is there any way is there any way you could show me how to pour a perfect pint here put your arm around me don't touch my breast that's for Steve Lodge don't don't do that so Shannon and Vicky are shit faced and that's when you start getting along with well it's when you start getting along with them or killing them we're gonna see what your street does here in a minute When we walked in here, everybody was like, oh, hello, good to see you, good to see you. And by the time we walked out, we're like, people are going to be turning over trash cans on fire by the time we get out of here.

55:50It looks like people are ready to party today. Fingers crossed. So anyway, they're drunk, so they're in a good place, right? Everything's good. So Tamra's like, look over there, Shannon and Vicki. They're in a good place right now. That's all Judas and Jesus really needed, a good pint, you know what I'm saying? I wish Jesus had just turned to Judas in the Bible and said, They would have laughed. They would have been saved. Everything would have been great.

56:20Ben Mandelker: Well, I just want to announce to everyone that I have to go to the bathroom. But before I go to the bathroom, here's a big trio. Whale of a time, top of the morning, hoola kicking. Ha, Shannon Airport, Ethiopia. I'll be right back. So Vicky's like, hey, bartender, is there any way you could teach me how to pour a perfect pie? You want to whoop it up? Hey, have you ever whooped it up in a butthole? Do it. Do it right now. I'm going to show you how to do it. Do it right now. Put your hand on my butt. Oh my God. Thank you. Anybody have a dollar? Anybody have a dollar? So Vicky, after she has this very sexual moment with the bartender, she's like Woohoo!

57:01Ben Mandelker: And Kelly's like Hey Vicky! Vicky! Vicky! What do you have right there? What do you have right there in your shirt? Woohoo! Just flicked her nose. She fell for it. She fell for the old flicking the nose thing. Oh, God. It works every time. It works every time. Oh, it's so good. So good to laugh again. So Biggie's like, I didn't like that. I didn't like that. I didn't like that. I didn't like that. I didn't like that. I didn't like that. That was poo-a-poo-a. You know what? Be nice to her, Batch. Be nice to her, Batch. I didn't like that. I didn't like that. I am very nice to her. I'm really nice to her.

57:37Ben Mandelker: I don't do the nose flick thing to people who don't like it. Okay, you know what I gotta do? I don't like that either, Kevin. I don't like it. But you know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna go pee-pee right now. I'm gonna go pee. I don't wanna talk about it. I don't wanna talk about the nose flick. I'm gonna go pee right now, bitch. Yeah, whatever. I'm gonna pee right now, bitch. I just did this. I'm gonna pee. It's no big deal. I just, you know what? Keep walking. Keep walking. What? What? What? Yeah, keep walking.

58:02Ben Mandelker: Just keep walking. What? Go have fun not getting your nose flicked Over there What did you say? I said keep walking She's a dick She's a dick She's a dick to me Not a dick Keep walking Don't do that You talking to me She said she doesn't like it Okay I'm not talking to you Tamara is standing all the way at the other side of the bar. And she's like, Kelly, you've taken to another level. You've taken to another level, Kelly. I'm not talking to you. I'm not. I'm not. Listen, we're just saying that people don't like that. Don't do that. It's not a hoolie.

58:58Ben Mandelker: Kelly has a really amazing ability just to take a good time and knock it on its ass. I'm like, oh yeah, Heather Dubrow, Doyenne of Great Times. Cut to, you're a cock! That's what you are!

59:13Ben Mandelker: Guys. It was a joke, guys. My God. What thing is wrong with you? Hold on one second. Hold on, hold on, though, real quick. Are you going to apologize? Oh, I did it again. I did it again. Got her again. Oh. It was a joke. It was a joke. By the way, this is the time when we tell everyone who was dragged here who didn't watch the show, this really all happened, by the way. I mean, what the hell? What's wrong with everybody? I don't like this. I don't like this. What's wrong? I make one joke and I back the sushi party status? It's not like I called anyone a cunt. I know it's a joke, but it makes people not laugh.

59:58I mean, you've done sitcoms for years that have made people not laugh. No one's mad at you.

1:00:03Ben Mandelker: It's not funny. It's hurtful. It's not a whale of time. What about the joke? Sometimes, I love this, Tamara. Sometimes you're a bit crass. Excuse me. I just farted. I just farted. I was thinking about blowing Eddie and I farted. You're just crass. You're crass. Sorry I'm fighting right now But I was trying to lecture you But Eddie's been fucking me up To ask that You're sensitive Okay well I'm sorry I'm so sorry that you guys are sensitive And I won't do it again I'm sorry you're sensitive I don't think that any of us are sensitive Yeah You're saying that like it's our problem For being sensitive And not your problem For calling people a cunt And pretending to have saints on their shirt It's not gonna fly missy When you want to apologize You apologize.

1:00:55Ben Mandelker: You apologize. You say, I am sorry, period. And then I write you and text back saying, it is not your job to adjudicate this sort of apology. People are so sexy. If you can't say anything anymore, what, are you going to cancel me? What am I cancel now? It's cancel culture. Summer smells like citrus in the sun, spontaneous road trips, and warm backyard evenings that stretch on forever. It's a feeling you want to hold on to long after the season ends. With Pura's Summer Fragrance Collection, you can restore your sense of place, bringing the moments that define your summer right into your home exactly the way you remember them.

1:01:33Clean fragrances, smart control, all from your phone. Visit Pura.com to shop the Summer Collection.

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1:02:43Usually

1:02:44Ben Mandelker: People of Jewish descent Are sarcastic And they're funny And they get jokes Everyone knows this Yeah Jewish people are hilarious Look at Steven Spielberg Steven Spielberg funniest man in the world I mean Schindler's List Look it up Schindler's List Laugh out loud And then I guess Oh well apparently Jewish people are funny. So, I don't know what happened to my gene pool. Where's John the genealogist to tell me what the heck happened to Heather Dubrow? No, but Jewish people don't take things personally.

1:03:28Ben Mandelker: As a Jewish person, I can say I take lots of things very personally all the time. That's so funny. I mean, look, I'm just saying, like, they're funny and they're so sarcastic. and it's like, you need to stop saying that. You're being racist. I'm not being racist, I'm Mexican!

1:03:49Ben Mandelker: And soon I will find out that I'm black too! The only thing missing from this was, I can't be racist, I'm black! Which is an actual quote she said two years later. I'm Mexican! She did a 23andMe. And it said she was like 2%. from Africa or something. It's like, I am black, how dare you? Okay, you know what? I'm good. I get it. Apparently, I'm humorless. I'm like, well, actually, that's true. I mean, I wouldn't blame your Judaism for that. Yeah. Even a problematic clock is right twice a week or a day. I don't know that your stick up the ass is a religious thing, but you sure treat it like it is.

1:04:33You're pretty dedicated to it.

1:04:35Ben Mandelker: So Vicky, of course, is like, I'm staying out of it. I'm just trying to get into everyone's good graces, so I'm staying neutral and just masturbating to Steve's shoes right now. You're so crass, Vicky. I'm just trying to stay out of the fighting. I don't want anything here. I just can't get into those fucking fights right now. It's too big for me to handle right now. So Kelly's like, why do you have animosity against me? What did I ever do to you? It sounds like you do. No, I don't. You do so. I don't fetch. You know what, Kelly? You know what, Kelly? No, because when I say something, you go and tell everybody, and now everybody knows what I say.

1:05:12She told you. She told that girl I said stuff.

1:05:16Ben Mandelker: You know what, Kelly? I kept your fucking secrets. I didn't even tell Heather, who's standing right here, about what she said. I'm hilarious, person. You're hilarious, by the way. I love your work. Thank you. I was the funniest member of Fiddler on the Roof in the 10th grade, but whatever. I was the only person that got a laugh during the bottle dance.

1:05:44Ben Mandelker: The school newspaper at Horace Greeley High School said, the funniest thing that ever happened to Tropical in New York since the last time Heather Dubrow tried to do comedy. Yeah, bachelor. I didn't even tell Heather about what you said, about how you had your real estate agent check in to see how much money she owes on her lot. And Heather's like, ah! That's my favorite Tamra move is when she goes, I kept all your secrets, including the one I'm about to say right now. I didn't know you were fucking lying. Heather's like, money owed lot. Heather rich. Heather rich. You're a goddamn liar out of your mind.

1:06:24Ben Mandelker: I'm Mexican. I never did that to you. Jewish people are funny. She did. She tell me you're money on a lot. I'm sick out of it. I'm staying out of it. This has nothing to do with me. So the big thing, the big secret that's outed is that when Heather and Terry went to buy land for their house, they didn't have enough money, so they had to get a loan. And it's like, the whore of mortgage. Alone? Alone? That's worse than the racism I've just endured. So Tamara's like, yeah, when she met Terry, she paid for the lot that they built their house on. And she goes, oh, no, they didn't. I looked it up. And Kelsa's like, are you kidding me?

1:07:06I looked it up.

1:07:08Ben Mandelker: You had your real estate agent. Look it up. I swear to God on Jesus Christ, who Tamara pretends to believe in, that she told me that she gave her first loan. That's what I told you. Someone gave her a loan. And we see a flashback to this vicious rumor of Tamara saying, guess what? Heather was an actress, and she worked in the 1900s. she was making good living she bought her lot really? because my friend said they got a loan she couldn't afford their lot so they had to get a loan no one can afford their lot they're nine zillion dollars so Kelly's like you're a liar of a fucking liar you guys this is a public restaurant too late you're a goddamn liar We're out of here.

1:07:58You're a fucking liar. She's not you. She's not you. So it's like being pulled away. You're all pain. You're all on me.

1:08:11Ben Mandelker: We are going to Grafton Street. We will go into a civilized department store where nothing bad will happen.

1:08:22Ben Mandelker: As in an effort to be a good podcaster, I walked into that department store today. And I thought, wow, right here where this girl is about to barf on the Chanel counter, this is where Heather Dubrow was kicked out of a department store for some of her life. So they're walking into this store, and Kelly's still going, she's a fucking shit liar, that's what she fucking is. She's a fucking liar. Walking off that slope, you know. She's a liar. She's a fucking liar, all right. And she's walking with Shannon, who's like, really? Are we going towards a pot of gold? On the top of the morning! Still shining.

1:09:01Ben Mandelker: Kelly, if you'd like to say something terrible, you can do it now and I won't tell anyone. Yeah, she's a fucking liar. A goddamn fucking liar. No wonder a daughter doesn't talk to her. Whoop. Huh. What? Huh. I like, by the way, I like how everyone's like, wow, that was too far when we all were thinking the exact same thing. In public, we say woo. Inside, we go. Shannon, who's so terrified when literally her storyline last season was like, well, I'm surprised they don't call CPS on Gina. So Shannon, Child Protective Services in America. So Shannon's like, oh, seriously? Don't say that about her daughter.

1:09:46Ben Mandelker: Come on, don't say that. Say more and I'll go tell it to Tamara. Just add some sizzle to it. I mean, the worst, the worst, the worst that come out of this woman's mouth I just, I just, I, what, what? It's like she's saying bottom of the morning. It's terrible. Who would even say it? They go into the store and Tamara, we just hear this on the microphones because the store is like, I'm sorry, we're way too classy for this. And for the records, we're not fucking O'Tools. Get your cameras out of here. You just see Megan passing the window with flyers. Are you an O'Tool? O'Toole sells 50 % off. So what's great about this is we don't see what's happening, but I think we all can see exactly what's happening in there.

1:10:28Ben Mandelker: Because we just hear Tamara saying, what did she say to you? What did she say? Oh, well, she said no wonder her daughter doesn't talk to her. And I go, don't you dare say that. She said what? She said what? Stop it. Stop it, Tamara. No, not near the clinic. Not near the clinic. Tiny stomp, tiny stomp, tiny stomp. She's barging through the Calvin Klein section. You fucking bitch. What did I say? You talked about my fucking son. I'll fucking kill you. What are you talking about? What is wrong with you? Oh, you hit me. Oh. Fuck yeah. What the hell happened? Fuck yeah. Kevin died this night. And this is my bad situation.

1:11:09With my own designer. Tamra. Tamra. And then begins the Tamra shaking face and moving her lips like a fish that has just been taken out of the water.

1:11:22Ben Mandelker: Oh no, oh no, get her into the squirter van. Open that squirter van up. She's gonna melt down, get in here. Oh God, oh God, oh, oh, it's okay, it's okay. Oh, oh, you're safe, you're safe, you're safe, Tamara. Okay, breathe slower, breathe slower. Okay, are you okay, are you okay? Do you need any alcohol? Okay, are you safe? Just thinking back to that time, I got flicked in the nose. Oh, don't say it, Tamara Oh, it's taking me back, too Oh, no, oh, no Oh, no, we need to cradle each other Oh, the memories Oh, oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh Oh, wait, I'm being revived by how wonderful my marriage is Oh, oh, David It's one of the hardest things I've ever had to go through in my life It was life-changing pain Every color dot color That is it I find it, I find it disgusting disgusting don't let her affect you but in case you want to be affected by her let me just remind you she did say that her daughter doesn't speak to you your daughter doesn't speak to you because you're an awful awful person for her to situate that my daughter doesn't speak speaks up a bad person is bullshit is there a better reason can I have the other reason because if there's another reason I'd love to hear it you can't just offer up an alternate theory and then don't tell us what the alternate theory is What's the alternate theory, girl?

1:12:50Bring it. Okay, breathe slower.

1:12:52Ben Mandelker: Breathe slower, Tamara. Breathe slower. Okay, breathe slower. Okay, look at me, Tamara. Look at me. Well, it's really close up. I'm going to look at you from here. I'm going to look at you from here. Tamara, you're an amazing mother. Just look at the way Ryan turned out. You're just wonderful. You're a great mother. You're doing wonderful things. He is very, very good about telling people which bathroom to use. Okay, okay. You're an amazing mom, and she's a fucking moron, okay? Don't give it any life But to do that She just wants to hurt people Because you even said she's miserable And she's hurting so bad And that's what people do They hurt people around them Not everyone can be happy like me and David You know she's Eva She's just like Satan Who Jesus fought that time

1:13:45They both had guns and they had to stand back to back. And Judas said, go now, stupid. And so they passed 10 paces and then they turned around. They went, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. And Jesus was shot right up to a cross.

1:14:05I don't think that's how that works.

1:14:06Ben Mandelker: Shut up, shitting! Christian now. Tamara just there with her tongue dangling out, staring directly into the camera to be like, are you getting this? Just amazing. So then Shannon goes out and everyone, the women are outside the van. Oh, my face is coming off. So Shannon goes up to Kelly and goes, I told her what you said. And she's like, what did I say? What was your agenda? It wasn't about you, Shannon. It wasn't about you. I was saying, I was talking about her. I wasn't talking to her. Yeah, Shannon, if I wanted her feelings, I would have told her her daughter hated her right to her face. I was doing it behind her back.

1:14:43Oh, yeah.

1:14:46Ben Mandelker: You tried to do the right thing. So now Tamara's on the phone. Which, by the way, she had a point. If I'm talking shit about you behind your back, that's me protecting the whole neighborhood. I'm exploding my bomb inside my own house and not bringing it into the public square. You're welcome. Well, just in case this travesty couldn't get any worse, all of a sudden we hear like...

1:15:12Ben Mandelker: I just want you all to know I have never been asked to leave a store in my life not even in the simplest acting exercises but because of that thing that you, Kelly Dodd and Tamara just had they asked us to leave me, television's Heather Dubrow but she hit me, I do not care you shouldn't have said that about her, kid I could have been perusing dresses, looking at accessories, staring at poor people, and instead I'm out here on the sidewalk. Awful. I'm being ostracized! I'm being bullied! Nobody wants to hear my side! I let me paint the picture for all of you, so you can know exactly the humiliation and despair.

1:16:03Ben Mandelker: I was in the bathroom, taking a dump, yes, and this is what I hear at the door. Are you in O'Toole?

1:16:18Are you?

1:16:22Ben Mandelker: And someone said, You want to whoop it up? You know how? You want to whoop it up? And then I see two pairs of shoes slid under my stall and they were apparently from Steve Lodge. and then a voice says is there an American lady in there?

1:16:45Ben Mandelker: and I said excuse me sir I have been working on my Irish accent all day I took a special spray and if top of the morning whale hooligan time doesn't sound Irish to you then maybe you're the one who should check your Irish hearing Next thing you know, they grabbed me by my hands My delicate hands And threw me out onto the street It was horrifying You really crossed the line, Kelly You really crossed the line, bitch You know what? I was talking to her in private because I was pissed off Because you lied about me You thought I lied? You did lie Did I? Did you just think I died? Wait a minute, I'm confused now.

1:17:33This is bullying!

1:17:36Ben Mandelker: Listen, have a moment of silence for me being kicked out of a department store. Be quiet. Turn around. I never said I looked into her being poor. I just said somebody told me she was poor. I honestly feel like I'm back in grade school with all these mean girls. So now they go back to the hotel and everybody's mad. And Vicky's like, oh, I'm bad at here on this one. This was pure chaos. What are we, a bunch of hillbillies? No offense, Bob. No offense, Bob. Sorry, I should have said family. That was rude. Too far. Let me reel that in. It's okay. It's a safe space. So Kelly walks in, and we hear Tamara.

1:18:16Ben Mandelker: Tamara's sitting at a table elsewhere in the lobby, and she goes, oh my God, look, crazy town, crazy town, crazy town, crazy town. Says the woman who was just sitting in a band going, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. And I'm like, that is so mean. But then you see Kelly and her hair is like, all, she's like, where's the elevator? Her lipstick is just like up here. I'm being bullied. So then Kelly goes into the suite where Megan's been sitting there like, do you want to hear about genealogy? Oh my God, you wouldn't believe what just happened to me. You found an O'Toole. What? You found an O'Toole. Ah, fuck off!

1:18:56I just had four of the girls go crazy on me right now. Heather was like, you're looking into me. And I was like, I swear to God, I've never looked into your financials, but I just know you're poor, okay? I'm sorry.

1:19:05Ben Mandelker: That sounds like something I would do. Ha ha. That was a joke. By Megan King Edmonds. But I mean, so what? So I mean, they're just mad at me. It's so unfair because I was like, Tamara's daughter probably doesn't talk to her because she's a bitch. Megan's like, whoa. Wow.

1:19:28Ben Mandelker: So yeah, Kelly's just like, and Kelly's like, I didn't mean to say this, I want her back. So meanwhile, out at the tea table, Tamara's like, I mean, I was giving her the benefit of the doubt because I felt like she was wounded and hurt and she was in a bad relationship. And I've been making excuses after excuses after excuses, bitch. Which is a lie, because this is Tamara's classic thing is that she like coaxes you into this feeling like you have like a relationship with her and then she gets just enough information at the right moment, three quarters through the season. She turns against you on the cast trip, and then it's like hell time for the rest of the season.

1:20:01Ben Mandelker: Yeah. Well done. Well done, champs. I've been sassy part of the Academy. I've built her up, made her feel all confident so I could rip her down again. Beat her with the bat with the rest of you and call her stupid. So fun. Just what Jesus would have done. Right, girl? They're like, you're just such a good person, Tamara. You are such a good person. So we go back to Megan and Kelly in the room, and Kelly's like, I mean, like, I'm like, this chick is like fucking shit-disturbing liar. She's like, who, Tamara? Who else? Come on, Megan, who else are we talking about here? I was just there all by myself.

1:20:39Nobody would even stick over me. Like, I'm sorry I pretended you had a stain on your shirt. I'm sorry. Wait a second.

1:20:45Ben Mandelker: Hey, Megan, Megan, Megan, Megan. Whoa, whoa. There's a stain on your baby. Oh, no, I'm pregnant. Oh.

1:21:02Ben Mandelker: Still funny, still funny. So Megan's like, what about Vicky? Did she stand up for you? Which is like my favorite thing that people do on these shows too when they're like, by the way, be mad at someone else now. So she's like, no, Vicky just sat there alone the whole time and just said caliente.

1:21:21So basically, she's crying and everyone else is like, that bitch is God. Let's go party now. Yeah.

1:21:27Ben Mandelker: So they're all going to go out. Meanwhile, they're like, OK, you know what? We're going to save this day. So we're going to go out. We're going to go out and have some dinner and go see a show, etc. Vicky just sexually assaults everybody that she sees. Like the next 10 minutes are pure Vicky mayhem of her just going up to people like, oh, my God, what are you doing? The Riverdance? Is that the Riverdance you do with the claggity claggity? Click, click, click, click. Wow, that's amazing. Whoa, are you doing that with two legs or three? Want to whoop it up, Flashdance? Get over here. Get over here.

1:21:59Ben Mandelker: They're at this great place. There's beers flowing. People are dancing. There's a band playing and everything. Everyone's having the best time. And then Megan King Edmonds. So the genealogist John today, he was saying if we go to Greystones, which is like five miles from our hotel, I could tap on anyone's shoulder and there's like a 99 to 150 % chance that they're an O'Toole. Yeah. The band is like...

1:22:32We'd like to welcome the ladies from America. Are you an O'Toole? Are you an O'Toole? Are you an O'Toole? Are you an O'Toole? Are you an O'Toole? Are you an O'Toole?

1:22:46Ben Mandelker: so then

1:22:50Ben Mandelker: they're like everyone this is the end of Irish dancing it ends here tonight so so meanwhile Kelly's on the balcony at her hotel and she's calling it Michael and she's like Michael they're so mean to me all I did was flick them in the nose ten million times hey Michael you know the one Don't worry. Hey, you got something on your shirt? He's like, yeah, hold on. Do I? Bro, I've got you. Ow, my nose. Oh, God. How did you do that? How could you even do that? It's just Jolie. I did it, mother. I did it. You guys are. Jolie's okay. Jolie's okay. Jolie's okay. I know when I brought up Vicky's mom, that was sad.

1:23:34She passed, but Jolie's still with us. You guys don't have to. Jolie's thriving. Y 'all don't got to moan about Jolie. She's fine. Everyone's like, aw. She's like, aw, Jolie. So, yeah, I don't know, you flick a couple of noses, it's like nobody likes me. So I call somebody poor, big deal. I just don't understand why everybody is so mean to me. He's like, here's what you need to do, honey. Fuck those ladies, they don't fucking care. Nobody will like you. You got a temple bar? You got a temple bar? How was it, did you have a good time? Hey, did you see anybody we know at temple bar? Tinsley, don't you dare bring up Tinsley fucking Mortimer to me.

1:24:10Don't you dare.

1:24:11Ben Mandelker: Michael, you're too drunk, I can't. You know what's pretty funny because all this time I was trying to get a break from Michael and now he's the only person I want to see anymore. I think Michael's the only one who has my back. Surely this one's going to last forever. Tough for the morning to you. And that brings us to the end of Real Hosses of Orange County. Good night, everyone. Thank you Dublin so much for coming out tonight. You were amazing and we will be back soon. Thank you for this Hooli time. Good night everyone. Love ya. Thank you.

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