#3456 The Valley S3E16: The Balls’ in Your Court

0:00This is Hannah Berner, the co-host of Giggly Squad. We could all just stay in bed scrolling through other people's vacations forever, but where is the fun in that? The best memories come from stepping outside of your little bubble and being open to the unexpected. And what better way to be open to the unexpected than finally booking that trip to Europe? You guys know I'm a Delta girly. Every time I go, I get my Delta headphones. And when I fly to Europe, Delta treats me like a queen and they'll treat you too. I was always a little nervous about navigating a foreign country, but then I realized it's so important to grow and see different cultures and to put yourself in different situations, and Delta held my hand the whole time.

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1:50Watch what crappens, watch what crappens, who cares what happens when there's so much that crappens? Let's look at what crappens, who cares what happens when there's so much that crappens? Hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today is the one and only Ronnie Karam. Hi Ronnie, how's it going? Hey, good. What's going on with ya? not much you know we're here on thursday bagel thursday i had my bagel and um we're here to talk about the valley uh of course don't forget to go over to patreon.com slash watch what crap ends and you can get access to our weekly bonus episode which was about other tv like big brother and love island and things like that um oh is that a topo chico i hear over the sound Splirted everywhere

2:44Ronnie Karam: It sounds so refreshing Doesn't it? Hot sea-y summer weather Oh, it's delicious sounding Delicious Ronnie does A newsletter Every week that's free for all That's also on Patreon And we also have ad-free listening there And also a video, so you can watch the Topo Chico Not just listen to it Today, it is Valley time And we are We're closing in on the end of the Valley season. We still have two more episodes, though. But this one was all about Jasmine and her engagement party. This was sort of like the step in for her wedding, since they didn't actually film her wedding. What are you thinking, Ronnie?

3:29How are you feeling? How are you feeling about the Valley? Great. Yeah?

3:33Ronnie Karam: Sure. Yeah. Yeah, I'm not really into a show watching dudes be emotionally abusive to their wives. So I'm kind of frustrated with this whole thing. I thought it was a cute episode for Jasmine, though. You know, I like Jasmine. I thought it was cute. You know, what are you going to do? It's a show on Bravo. I keep watching it. I love the first couple of seasons of The Valley. This one has frustrated me. But you know what? That's just how life goes. There's peaks and valleys in every relationship. I'm in a valley. I'm in a valley with the valley. We are out of sync with the shows that we are hating this week.

4:09because for you, you're not really feeling the valley. I don't really feel McBee. But the good news is one thing we both feel is the desire to make fun of people on reality television. Yeah, no matter what.

4:20Ronnie Karam: That will always bring us together. No matter what you feel. That will always get us through at the hard times. Yeah. No matter what you feel, you make fun. And that's how you should live your life. You know? Make fun. Yes. So we're back from Mexico. What you missed. By the way, on the latest episode of Crappy Hour, we did talk about really all the shows from last week that we missed, all the shows that had something exciting going on. And so we did talk about The Valley, etc. But for those who missed it, basically, Danny was being a pig, as usual. He got too drunk. He is the one who started asking questions about why people feel uncomfortable around him.

5:02And then he accused everyone else of bringing it up. Lala put him in his place wonderfully first by saying, I ain't your wife don't talk to me like that, I ain't your wife and then saying, I ain't that bitch I ain't that bitch

5:14Ronnie Karam: or whatever she says, you know, typical Lala shut the fuck up your Polly Pocket, motherfucker her finger guns that she has you little Polly Pocket bitch whatever she was saying Lala's great when she's aimed at someone you detest yeah, this is the best version of Lala, and Tom Schwartz again did something very impactful on the show. Just kidding. He did nothing. And Danny, the episode ended with Danny basically sulking at the bar alone because he wasn't able to go upstairs and have sex with Nia on his birthday. Oh, and he just got kind of told off by everybody. Well, la la, but nobody really is going to help Danny.

5:55Ronnie Karam: I mean, Danny's like a belligerent idiot. Drunk. And he keeps bringing up the same thing over and over and expecting an apology you're not getting an apology you're not the one getting danny oh my god idiot idiot and then sitting at his birthday like happy birthday to me happy birthday to me what an insufferable little gooner yeah he is just the worst he's really terrible i think as a as an actor i think he's used to being the one that everyone loves and is entertained by and thrilled by. And actually, he's just like no one enjoys him anymore. And he doesn't understand that, which is why he keeps on asking like, so apparently I make everyone uncomfortable.

6:38He like can't imagine that. He sees himself as the life of the party and he's completely puzzled as to why he would ever be considered annoying. But he's actually one of the most annoying people on Bravo right now.

6:52Ronnie Karam: Yeah, he really is. He really is. Bitch, go! And then the music on this show continues to crack me up It's like Money, money, money I got all the money I got all the girls with money And it's money, yeah And then it closes in on Danny at his house in Santa Clarita I'm like, what? It's a song It's a song being sarcastic What is this? Santa Clarita Where that's the closest he could get to Los Angeles and be able to have a little backyard for less than$500 ,000 or something. They had to go all the way up there. I went to Santa Clarita during our break, actually, not to experience the Danny and Nia lifestyle, but I was up there.

7:43And it is so far. I know we've emphasized it many times, but this is a fresh visit. It didn't get any closer. It was not easy. It is so far and so dry and it is so hot up there. Like if you are up in Santa Clarita, you are in a different region. Okay. You're in a different region. I feel bad for Nia in the sense that she is, she's basically been stolen away from all her friends and civilization. Well, you got to pet a goat. I did. We went to a petting zoo, Dom and I, and I didn't pet a goat because the goat had lice that day. but i pet several sheep and oh a sheep it was amazing it was the most beautiful thing oh my god i also fed a pig i did not enjoy that to be honest i think people that's supposed to be like wonderful because the pig was huge and cute and adorable um the pig also was like

8:42Ronnie Karam: so the pig did you hand feed it like you held stuff in your hands and the pig ate it out of Yeah, you put food on your hand and you put the food out like this. And the thing is you can't put your fingers forward because it'll bite your fingers. You have to put your palm forward and it licks and it gets everything on your hand. And I wanted to be like, let me step out of my comfort zone because I don't normally like doing this. It was disgusting. I also pet a cow, which was fun. You pet a cow? Yeah. Yeah, those are pretty cute. Yeah, but pigs, I don't know who would tell you to put food in your hand and go near a pig.

9:14Ronnie Karam: Don't eat your hand off. well you have that's what you have to serve it like you sort of like no you just put it on your you can get your snot all over me while you eat and i had yeah for three days and it changed my life spanky but even that's when i learned i was like not even a little pig don't feed them like that you know that's when you put it on the ground you don't care your pig the pig was enormous it was enormous it had no spatial awareness either and it was just it was crazy but it was adorable and um but yeah the petting zoo was great santa clarita i don't know so um if they're daniel and mia are talking about we just got back from mexico daniel and he's like this whole mexico thing i just don't understand it i think he's actually talking about the concept of the country what do you mean there's more places outside of america and mia's like yeah i had this conversation a few times in my head in my mind my friends don't act like that i'm like well that's because it's happening in your mind but in your reality they do she's like friends don't do that i keep saying that but then for some reason i keep considering these people my friends and that's the hard part for me because i was even thinking about your birthday dinner because in my mind that's not that was not your birthday dinner you're angrier at your friends who are really just trying to look out for you and stand up for you than you are the guy who is making your life a living hell, who has stolen you off into Santa Clarita, away from the joys of Vendora Boulevard.

10:47Ronnie Karam: Yeah, and she also started some of it, Nia, which I found interesting, like telling Danny in a gay bar where there's strippers and people are getting bumpy and grindy. She's like, don't move your hips in. You're making everybody uncomfortable. and then set him off into his little baby tantrum that he's still – I mean, he just went off for days, including his own birthday. Yeah. So, yeah. Yeah, that still was so remarkable that she even said that, like your hips are making people uncomfortable. When no one had said that, it's just like that was her – her takeaway is that she's clearly still fixated on the get a drink for daddy moment with the hand on the butt or the thigh or wherever his hand was.

11:32And it's like, no, you're making people uncomfortable because you're loud and annoying and you're sneaking drinks around and people don't want to feel like they are like accomplices to whatever secrets or bad behavior you're doing. It's like people, the stuff with the hand, I feel like that has now been resolved. It's just more like, but like, that's all she can focus on. That's like all, like, that's just, that was just, it's like the fact that she doesn't even understand why people are uncomfortable is, like, tragic.

12:03Ronnie Karam: Especially now, because this season he's been so mean to her in front of everybody, on camera, belligerently drunk. So I'm confused as to why she's confused. and you can see that she sees it because she's trying to drag him away so he doesn't look stupid or trying to stand in front you know in between lala and him um so that he doesn't say the wrong thing or whatever but just get him out of there and then don't just don't kind of poke at him and tell him oh there you're making everybody uncomfortable dan you know they're just both so annoying at this point just go away none of these people are your friends and this show really could use some new casting it needed it this year too they needed a new couple to come in this year to shake things up because this is the same shit where we've been talking about forever it needs some new shit so they needed to be fired already but i guess you know think ties have changed for sure next so next season it's gonna be sheena in a groucho marks mask and brock in like a blonde wig and she'll be like hello my name is robert Mina My name is, I'm sorry, my name is Sir Sir Sir Gal Sheena And this is my wife Brockette Just could be undercover as a new couple A gender swapped couple They're gonna be gender swapped That way people would be even less likely To recognize them In their minds Yeah, they announced Well, I think it was official I don't know, I don't even know what to lie anymore what you see on social media, but that there's going to be a season four of this.

13:46Ronnie Karam: They announced it and they picked up cameras so they could get everyone's reaction to Jax being caught with his, you know, his and Britney's publicist, Lori Kay. I don't want to see that. This is not a good picking up the cameras again. Like, I'm sorry. I don't care about someone who is never on this show dating, having an affair with someone who's no longer on the show. Like the stakes are so low for me. I don't know why we're picking up the cameras again for this. I would rather pick up the cameras again because, you know, Luke went fishing. I don't know. Like this is so inconsequential to me.

14:26I don't even know why it even is making so much news, you know?

14:30Ronnie Karam: Yeah, we all knew that Laurie Kay and Jax banged a long time ago. There was that rumor that they banged in the bathroom and then Brittany took Lori Kaye off of her Instagram, but then I guess still kept her as both of their managers. Apparently, Brittany just fired Lori Kaye. She's still been both of their managers, which is nuts. But, yeah, I don't need the cameras to be picked up ever again, actually. Just leave the cameras down. Just for good stuff. Put the cameras down and walk away. That's what I say. Well, yeah, that is what it is. I think you're right. Bring in a new couple. But I also think it's really shitty that Nia is basically like, none of these people are my friends.

15:10And this is like, this is what's so sad in these relationships is the guy is the dick and he's awful, but he also like creates a culture of like circled wagons around us. And like, we're the only ones that matter. And so now she's going to isolate herself from people who actually, I think we're friends with her and did work trying to sort of have her back. I mean, it's hard to say with this group, how, what, what's the line between I want to have her back versus I want to have a good scene for TV. But it's just sad. You see this all the time, and she'd be isolated up there in Santa Clarita, and it'll just be her and her church friends, and that's it.

15:43Ronnie Karam: Yeah, well, I mean, welcome to choice making. Have fun with that. Have fun with that bed you made. At this point, I don't even care, because normally I'm of that mindset. I feel bad for Nia, this and blah, blah, blah. But it's starting to, it's, you know, with her blaming everybody else, And, you know, like pushing Danny and then being like, oh, no, why is Danny upset? I'm getting just enough of both of you, you know? And none of these people are your friends. But who are you a friend to of all of these people? You guys aren't great friends either, you know? And this whole, like, going to Santa Clarita, you're not going to see anybody.

16:22Ronnie Karam: So just go. Just go. Go home. Yeah. I mean, yeah, I think the big, like, not shocking moment, but the moment where I was just shaking my head last week was when Danny was getting angry at that table, you know, you know, talking to Lala. And then Nia came around and like sort of clasped him by the shoulders and swung her head in front of his. I was like, Daniel, Daniel, can you look at me? Can you look at your wife? Can you look at your wife? Can you pay attention to what your wife is saying? Ah, but they're all being mean to me. Can you focus on your wife, Daniel? I was like, oh, God. It's me.

16:57Ronnie Karam: It's your wife, Daniel. I was like, he's not in a coma. Why are you like, I'm going to lie, Daniel. It's me. I'm standing here at heaven's door. She sounded like Liv Tyler in Armageddon trying to reach Bruce Willis. Daniel. Daniel, be safe up there. Yeah, they're just that couple that's trying to project perfection. You know, like, I'm the man. I make the money. My wife stays home with the babies and keeps popping them out. We go to church and we're perfect little people. So it's starting to crack. And he's like, oh, my God, Daniel. Hey, you know what? Maybe it's a good technique. I think next time you get really angry at someone on this podcast, I'll be like, Ronnie.

17:41Ronnie, can you look at me? Can you look at your podcast wife? Look at your wife. Look at your wife.

17:47Ronnie Karam: Ronnie, it's me, Ben. Look at your wife.

17:53Ronnie Karam: we'll just wait for the next janet scene so that'll be our that'll be our code word when we're out and i'm acting up like i've had a couple of drinks look at your wife look at your wife like someone fighting with some dummy in a bar all right that's our that's our forever code word so uh they're talking about how crazy it is that everybody's just always attacking poor daniel uh p.s nobody attacked daniel he just started being belligerent and yelling at everybody for literally no reason at that party oh by the way we didn't we didn't i wasn't here to talk about zach ting taking the whole cast of straight people to the gay bar and then having them dress like they're at a gay rave for his party zach the gay god is the one who hit you in the head with that sign stop doing it don't do that that is the last thing the gays need especially in mexico like they don't need a bunch of american straight people coming in and grinding and then all the straight guys go up there and take off their shirts and start like grinding on the platform yeah you almost got decapitated for your sins against the culture right there that was there was we did cop ray and i think did talk about like this is the worst when a bunch of straight people come into the gay bar and then start grinding around and then britney is sitting there at the bar showing off pictures of like her baby to the to the bartender and he's like i don't care like i guarantee the bartender likes me i think it really likes me hey back to me okay it's my birthday the day after a few days and i get to still talk okay so our marriage i mean i know that it's you know i know it's always going to be good and that's strong, but this target attacked Danny train.

19:42It's stressful because we're a team and we have, we like to have fun. We like our friends. We love our friends. We love each other. God, don't attack poor little Danny.

19:53Ronnie Karam: Yeah. And then we see, uh, tons of piles of clothes all over their bedroom and she's like, Oh my God, cleaning closet explosion and unpacking and repacking explosion. How am I going to, how am I going to my first time ever touching Miss USA? Daniel and he's like well this is what you do you just go through dresses and that's a woman for you jeez I have a question why why that's woman for you why um why does he have to get his vasectomy this weekend do you think it's just like a production thing it's idiotic he's like my wife won't be here I'm a man who is taken care of by a woman and without my woman here How am I going to be taken care of?

20:40Ronnie Karam: Why are you scheduling it that way? Are you an idiot? Schedule it a week later. It's like the vasectomy guy's like, we can only do one day. We are only going to shave your, what do you call that part between your nuts and your butt? What do you call that? Not scrotum. I mean, the taint. Yeah. We can only taint shave once every six months. And if you're not here, then that's it. Also, why didn't they tell him to shave his taint before he went in there? I know. I don't want some nurse shaving my taint. That's so weird. I felt bad for the nurse that she had to go in there and do that. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

21:16Ronnie Karam: Like, what nurse? Who goes into health care for that? I mean, I get sometimes you have to in an emergency situation and stuff, and God bless you for doing it. But don't put health care workers through that. They go through enough. I have to imagine that this was just like a production thing. production thing production was like we'll pay for your vasectomy if you do it on this day and of course they probably knew that neo would be out of town they knew this would be a stressor like i had like it does not make any sense regardless of danny being a man baby if you do have like three kids and one one parent is out of town and you don't have any other help coming in it does seem a bit crazy honestly to be having surgery and also having to take care of these kids like even danny i'm gonna give them a pass on that one um so like it's weird that that guy get and also i don't think production is gonna pay for a vasectomy i just the production is so cheap why do they why were they so determined maybe maybe it was like that the next available date would have been out like after production wrapped i just don't understand yeah i it's stupid and if they are doing it for the show why like what kind of plot is that like whack i guess are going to do like the Mr.

22:29Ronnie Karam: Mom thing. I put too much laundry detergent in and now it's overflowing into the house or something like that. They'll try and pull a Mr. Mom thing. Yeah, but Danny is like very upset because he likes to be taken care of. So he's going to have a little party the night before that's going to be like a goodbye. By the way, he does have childcare coming in. Nia does arrange for child care to come in from 7 to 7. So that is all being taken care of. But I just still don't understand why they put themselves in this situation. I would move that surgery. I feel like there's probably a bunch of slots available, right?

23:09I mean, it's a pretty common short surgery. It's not that intensive. Anyway, I can't question these people anymore. They just have their own logic and none of it makes sense.

23:18Ronnie Karam: The ball scheduling is – It's like, hmm, why didn't they schedule that ball surgery at a different time? It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappens commercial. You know, one thing I love about summer is how easy everything feels. The days are more relaxed and I find myself reaching for the same comfortable go anywhere pieces again and again. Quince's 100 % European linen pants and shirts are breathable, easy to throw on, and the summer upgrade your rotation needs starting at just$34. The tees are soft enough to live in all day, and the lightweight cotton sweaters are exactly what you want when summer nights cool down.

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25:57That would go to Jasmine and she's going wedding shopping. She's getting her dress at a place called Jackson James. Okay. I don't want to say I'm not someone who believes too much in omens, but if you're getting your wedding dress at a place named after both Jax and James, I think that's not a great sign. Yeah, it's just every

26:17Ronnie Karam: Daniel will be up there next time. You know? Jax and James Daniel.

26:24I mean, I believe in Jasmine and Melissa, but let's not get our... I mean, next it'll be like Jax and James, Amanda, Daniel. I mean, it's really good. Let's just stay away from these names with your wedding dress.

26:38Ronnie Karam: Yeah. It's like, Let's not name our store after just multiple men that Lisa Vanderpump forgives after abusive behavior. So Brittany's like, how excited are you for this night? How excited are you? Oh, my God. When shopping? So the mom's sweet. She's like, I'm really excited. And we see Jasmine. And she's, you know, she imagined being a tiny little girl and shopping with her mom. She's got so many feelings, so many emotions. Now she gets to shop for her dress. Yeah, and her mom's been supportive of her dating men and now dating women, now getting married to women, all that stuff. And they're looking at dresses.

27:24And Zach is like, oh, I'm sure Jasmine probably wants a more understated dress. And like, I want it all. I want poof. I want huge hair. I want like, you know, Princess Diana. I'm like, well, you also wanted a monster fridge in your kitchen. So, you know, we're going to take all these with a grain of salt.

27:39Ronnie Karam: You know, we love some Zach. But Zach is wearing a denim, not here, but in his confessional. He's wearing jeans and a denim jacket that are both bedazzled. The jacket and the jeans. Sometimes I feel like some gays are good to ask for help in the taste department and some aren't. And the monster fridge gay in the denim and diamonds probably isn't the one that you ask. Not going to be necessarily his area of expertise. Benji, sure. But, you know, you just got to know. You got to know who to ask. Yeah. So, you know, Jasmine's trying on dresses and Karen's like, oh my God, this is the happiest I've ever seen her.

28:23You know, and she says that she used to pray for her all the time. And she has a nice little mom monologue, a momologue, where she's like, don't give up on love. You never know. You never know when you'll find the right person.

28:34Ronnie Karam: And then when you do, you'll know. Yeah, and Zach's like, you know, I remember when we were living together. I remember she would get sad because they're doing this whole thing like, God, Jasmine, she just used to be so sad. Do you remember? He's like, yeah, Jasmine. Oh, my God. Like, yeah, I lived with her so sad. Yeah, she was just so sad. But now Jasmine has found love, so she's happy now. I thought that was sad. I wonder if I will ever find love and people will say that about me. Like, it just used to be so sad. Oh. So you're trying on more dresses. It's a lot of dresses. It's a pretty standard trying on wedding dress scene.

29:15And Jasmine's saying that she's just, you know, I've just been very overwhelmed about dress shopping. Like, I think I've been putting it off, and I didn't think it was going to look pretty. but like I look really pretty and I do a gorgeous and um they're all just like really happy there's no easy way to say this but it was a it was a boring scene you know it's like happiness it's like the part of the story where someone finds love

29:41Ronnie Karam: and happiness and contentment and you're like okay well call me when you're divorcing okay I will watch that. I wish you the best over there. I wish you the best over there. This is just the way that these wedding dress scenes go, is that people get sentimental, people cry, they try on different dresses, and then they make proclamations about how they never believed in love, and now it's all coming true. And that's usually the way they go. Sometimes there's a fight if we're lucky, but usually not. I did like, well, I mean, Real Housewives of Atlanta. I think that was the best one with Mama Joyce and the aunts and stuff.

30:25Ronnie Karam: That was probably the best one we've ever seen on Bravo. I did like that the dress lady came over and was like, this is the Game of Thrones collection. From our Game of Thrones collection. Really? Does Game of Thrones have really not? I mean, Game of Thrones is known for the Red Wedding, which. Yeah. Their weddings are not always great. There was the red wedding, and there was also the black wedding or the white wedding or the blue wedding. There was another wedding. They're all bad. No one's ever happy during them. I don't want a wedding dress from a time period where they hadn't invented deodorant yet.

31:06Ronnie Karam: There's a general rule. So they do that. It's nice. And then they're talking about Daniel getting his vasectomy. And Jasmine's like, wait, he's getting his balls chopped off? They're like, well, his balls ain't getting chopped off. There's just like a little thing like inside of him. Oh, come on. Oh, my God, I'm about to pop a stitch. So then we go to Kristen and Luke's house. And they're in the backyard. And Luke is like, Mexico was wild, huh? She's like, yeah, I still have ocean water in my ear. He's like, yeah, I think partying for three days in a row, I think I'm too old for that. I'm still exhausted.

31:45That is music to my ears because there's really only one thing about Mexico I want to talk about, obviously. Well, Jesse really caught me off guard with what he said. And it's like a flashback because Jesse was the one who's like, so Kristen, Luke says he doesn't want to get married to you. He actually hates you. He doesn't like the side of your face and he wants to move to a different state.

32:06Ronnie Karam: So what do you think about that? Yikes. That was another just terrible, awkward scene. And Kristen is now doing the thing where she's like, I am calm, composed. She's kind of doing, I think, a Nia thing here. She's trying to model herself on Nia. We are going to have a very peaceful, calm relationship about how much we love each other. How can you even do that? I mean, I know you guys have a kid together, so that's probably more incentive to make it work. But yikes. Kristen. Yikes. so she wants to talk to him about that and he's like well i just like i think we see far more marriages like fall apart and people end up hating each other so what on this show that's crazy and she's like well i guess i have a bunch of questions in regards to that um you know you asked me to marry you which i guess is not a question it's just a statement but um all that stuff that you wasn't part of the proposal i guess he's like what it's like because like you weren't like will you marry me but like when things but things get hard and now we have a newborn so like what's going on yeah and he's like well i mean like you can't really tell what it's gonna be like when you first propose and this like now we have a baby like it's just harder than I thought when I proposed and like we fight and stuff.

33:28Ronnie Karam: So I don't know. I just didn't realize how much I'd be sacrificing before, you know, she got here. Is this your way of trying to make up? Because you just, this is worse. You asked somebody to marry you. So are you taking back? Are you taking it back or not? And then he keeps walking around telling everybody, if this keeps happening i'm out and then he tells her i'm never going anywhere why are you upset that i said i would leave but also like just say yeah i felt like we're fighting so much that i feel like we need to put some more time work and effort into this relationship before we we get our wedding put our wedding you know actually like get to the altar because like it's important that we are on like stable footings before we go into this instead of like well i mean I didn't say that.

34:17I mean, I did say that. I mean, I'm not going anywhere. I mean, yeah, I don't want to marry you. It's like he cannot actually articulate anything in a way that she's going to be able to hear and not get upset by. Yeah.

34:31Ronnie Karam: So she's like, well, I tried to tell you this is just temporary stuff, you know, and maybe it's hard for you to believe because it feels difficult. We're just in the thick of it. And he's like, yeah, we just need to get our footing before we start planning our wedding. But, you know, now we're in therapy and I don't know. I'm just like, it's all getting wasted in Mexico, complaining about you to everybody. Like, I'm literally sitting crying in a hallway in Mexico waiting for one of your friends to pass to complain about you two on camera. Fuck this guy. Don't marry this man. Don't do it. But I guess, like, the good thing.

35:10I guess they're, like, happy because they're in. I mean, I thought they were already in therapy, but it seems like now he's having a better attitude about it. I don't know, because she seems happy that he's in therapy. And he's smiling. He's like, I'm in therapy. So I guess this is like a little bit of a bow on this. I can't quite tell. But we then go over to Lala's house, and she's walking Sosa, who's dressed like a cute little lion. And Lala's brother Easton is there. And then their dog Lily is just lying on the floor, so cute. and I was like oh I never really appreciated Lala's dog Lily and then of course it turns out to be a sad Lily episode and I was like see they put up the super cute photo image of Lily to get to reel you in and then Lala tells us that she got Lily when she was 20 years old from an animal shelter in Salt Lake so I'm imagining before Bannerpump Rules and she brought the dog to LA and that Lily is like her soul mate and it's gone through all the highs and lows that she's gone through you know she said that Lily's even been on like private planes etc so Lily's been there for her through all of her journeys through like Rand the loss of her dad and uh she's basically saying it's she has to make a decision about Lily's future and you're like I was like just when the valley

36:25Ronnie Karam: can't get more depressing I was gonna say I'm already over with this show and then it's like a putting the dog down episode I can't I can't I was like yelling at the tv like stop please so I mean I have an old dog and I've been in that situation obviously and I just yeah I don't I don't want to watch it on TV but I had to and it sucked so then Kristen comes over and they sit down to talk and they're talking about wow you know like Lala's saying you know it was wonderful to see you guys the night of Zach's birthday you guys were so cute on the bus That was my most favorite night. That was so good.

37:08Ronnie Karam: And you know when Lala's starting all positively that it's going to go downhill pretty quick. She's trying to give a compliment sandwich. And so this is the bread. Yes. And now comes the other side. Comes the other part. So Chris is like, yeah, it was wonderful. That last night was so weird, though. Yeah, it was a very chaotic night. And there was like Danny drama. Yeah, he's like not a good drinker. Yeah, because like maybe it's like not drinking and maybe it's just like i don't know like reactionary like look um look i'm just trying to play the devil's advocate right now i'm like you are literally being the devil's advocate and it's not helping anyone right now yeah um i thought she said he wasn't drinking i thought she was like but he wasn't drinking so maybe it's just but she i guess she said maybe it's not the drinking um so lala's like oh so you think that maybe it's just being a fucking asshole And she's like, yeah, like reactionary And she's like, you know, Kristen I get that you're playing the devil's advocate Okay, but I'm struggling To understand how you can defend This person Like, have you seen what was happening?

38:14Ronnie Karam: Like the shit that comes out of his mouth Do you want to know what he says to me? Like, why don't you go to your husband As if that's an insult to me The way he acts, the way he speaks to women Which, by the way, totally 100 % Agree with Lala Which feels it's been a long time it's been a long time but she's right on with all of this and she's like you know the way he speaks to women including his wife and then bro she blocked me as if she were a fucking lineman in a prairie dress Chris is like oh that was a good one that was a good one that was a good line lineman in a prairie dress so I was like I mean what the fuck is this and I said straight up if this is what a husband is I don't want it okay you can have him and Kristen's like, for whatever reason, I'm just still not noticing or seeing this.

39:03I'm just like in my bubble. Yeah, I mean, you are. Because like, it's just so blatantly obvious the fact that Kristen, none of this is landing on her radar and she's right there and she's not seeing any of it is like, that's not a good quality. Like you have to be able to see this. But then again, she also was like, besties with like Stassi and Katie for years and years. So she's kind of like immune to bad behavior and also a participant of.

39:28Ronnie Karam: She sees it. She does not care. You know, she does not care because she sees it. I think Lala called it when she was like, those aren't your friends, those are your allies. You know, you're seeing them as people who are standing against Janet with you. And right now that's all that matters to her. She sees that Danny's acting like this. She just doesn't fucking care. And it's typical. It's kind of typical Kristen. I mean, Kristen's always been toxic, you know? She had a good year here the first year because she hadn't been on for a while. She was really nice to Ariana after SkandaVa, which we saw in Vanderpump Rules.

40:03Ronnie Karam: That was like the first time we'd seen Kristen and her new hippie, like, I'm going to burn some crystals for you, cuckoo, or whatever she was doing then. And then she came on here, and they immediately were getting on her, and it was good to see Kristen back kind of yelling at people at parties. And as viewers, I think we're kind of toxic, too, because we're like, oh, my God, Kristen's back, and it's so fun. But let's not forget, Kristen has always been toxic, and she's always stood up for horrible fucking men. So, yeah, she has. So, Lala's like, look, I don't want you to think that I'm dismissing what you're going through.

40:40Like, having a baby is no joke, and I can't imagine having to try to keep, like, a relationship stable on top of that and dealing with postpartum. But also, like, you should hang out with your girls even for, like, 45 minutes. And by the way, I'm celebrating seven years in sobriety and I'm having a girls night. So you should come out for girls night. Okay. And so she's like, yeah, okay. I'll go to that. So that was her compliment sandwich, which is like, Hey, um, it was so fun going out to the gay bars with you. You are being ignorant right now. And how do you not notice that Danny is awful and let's have so much fun together at, um, at the celebration of my sobriety night.

41:16Okay.

41:18Ronnie Karam: Yeah. So now we go over to Michelle, and she's with her dad, and they are watering a plant that her mom caught her, so that's really sweet. And he's telling Isabel, like, you have to water this, you know, and next time I come, we'll make more plants. And so that's a cute scene. And then we go to Santa Clarita. Money, money, chicks in money, money everywhere. Money falling out my pockets. It's my name, my Santa Clarita, and Danny and Mia's house. Yes, so it's the balls voyage party. It's the night before his vasectomy. So the guys come over, Jesse and Danny and Tom, and Jesse's like, you know, he gets up to Danny's crotch.

42:03He's like, goodbye, my friends. Goodbye. And they're like, oh, my God, that's hilarious. Tom's like, hey, you know, we're just here to bust your balls. How are you feeling? Get it? That was a joke. Oh, my God.

42:17Ronnie Karam: So Nia's gone doing her stuff. And Danny's like, and I'm like, I've got three kids here. Literally, I was on the verge of tears today. Let's go. The guy who just wants more and more kids, now when he actually has to take care of them, is on the verge of tears. And he's like, look, I like to be cared for. My wife is my rock, a rock that carries you. Have you ever gotten a hug from a rock? She's the best. And I know that she's going to handle what needs to be handled. but she's going to give me some space that I need to recover. But that is like now all taken away from me and the procedures tomorrow.

42:52And I'm just like on an eight out of 10. I'm for anxieties. Let's not go.

43:00Ronnie Karam: My wife is my rock. Is that your other word for made? Because that's what you sound like. He's like, my wife is gone. Normally she gives me space to go sit and do whatever I need to do while she's taking care of these little fuckers. And now it's all taken away from me. Yeah. So Jesse, you know, Jesse's like, guys, you know, you've done something amazing. It's amazing work over the years. Look, you're committed. You've got a great life. Beautiful children. So I'm sorry to see you go, testicles. But you know what? The story doesn't end here. It grows. It's a new chapter. What did you say? Nothing.

43:40Ronnie Karam: I'm just going to cut the Jesse's speech short because it really goes on. Yeah, it goes on like a very long time. He's like knelt down in front of his crotch. I'm like, wow, this is really, this is a real monologue he's giving. Yeah, and then he moves on to what he really wants to talk about, which is mess. He's like, okay, guys, I have some questions. What about Mexico? You had a hard last night, right, Danny? And he's like, oh, yeah, on my birthday. Great birthday. Yeah, my birthday. and they just came out, came one after the other. And Jesse's like, well, how do you feel about that? Well, I was so heated.

44:18How could she lie over there going, she was waving frantically, making finger guns.

44:25Ronnie Karam: And Jesse's like, well, somehow I ended up talking to Janet and, you know, it's the first time I've ever heard her be vulnerable. And she talked about a past trauma. So, you know, I thought, why haven't you said that from the beginning? like why is she then saying it's because of jasmine and this and this i knew it right when jasmine uh told that on camera that this cast was going to do that i knew it what do you just be like oh she's just using that which is what they do oh meaning the guys were going to say that i knew that this cast was going to do that i knew that the reaction to janet's story was going to be.

45:04Oh, sorry, you said Jasmine, so I was confused. Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry.

45:07Ronnie Karam: No, Janet. Janet opened up about sexual assault. Oh, 100%. You knew that. Why didn't you say it? She should have said it beforehand. It's like, that's not the response that you're supposed to have. And then Luke's over there like, oh, wow. Yeah, the fact that she's bringing this up now, pretty much not surprising. Now all of a sudden it all becomes invalidated because it's not on their timeline. I don't think it's like something that someone just is like, oh, hey, well, here it is. Let me just put my trauma on the table on TV right now. I don't think it's something that is just like, they're acting like, oh, you should mention it just as if you should mention that you got a coffee this morning.

45:48Like, well, why didn't you tell us you got a coffee? It's like, it's not really as simple as that.

45:54Ronnie Karam: So Danny's like, well, you know, like she's talking about the enclosed space or the pantry or whatever. And let me just preface this again with saying me shutting the door, it was not in a closed tight position. It was a big pantry. And she also said, oh, he was chugging the bottle. Or, oh, no, then he just had a sip of the bottle. I mean, her story just changes over and over. You know, just shut up. The thing to do right now is just call Janet and say, Janet, I had not heard about this. I had no idea that this happened to you. I'm sorry that What was going on with me The stuff that I did Triggered you because of this thing you were going through I had no idea Can we just start over Like why is that So fucking difficult but someone comes to you With a story like that and the first thing These guys do or it's like No I don't believe it It seems pretty typical Yeah it's like And yeah Danny being like well our story's changing over and over.

46:58It's like, no, actually your story is the one that seems to change over and over again. It doesn't matter either way. You should still show some grace in this moment, be like, oh, so that's why this really was a situation. But he's anti-trigger unless it applies to him, right? So then, yeah, Luke is like, and the fact that it changed again two years later is not surprising. It didn't change two years later. It's that she shed more light on it two years later and so danny is like yeah you know when it comes to jenny and her trauma i just feel bad i mean i was unaware of any of that but i think she's just projecting her own like well like her her own trauma onto like me and using me as a punching bag and that's just not fair i'm like but like doesn't it make sense to you now no like doesn't it like doesn't it illuminate certain things for you like how do you not understand this uh because he's a fucking

47:53Ronnie Karam: idiot who only thinks about himself it's funny how someone who you know is so against triggered was triggered basically for the past two episodes that we saw in a row and throwing a temper tantrum in the back of the bus and lying down not letting anybody else sit on the bus because he's upset but he's the one he's like everybody's triggered and tom was like whoa whoa you know like you should respect not diminish someone's feelings i mean i'll never really begin to understand ptsd and stuff you went through but you know when you react and match their energy it just confirms their biases and corroborates the way they already feel which is a very subtle way of being like stop acting like an asshole on tv you are only doing yourself he's like did you just hear the storyline that was brought out like the piece of information that was just brought out now you're gonna say this oh my god i was just like oh god like it was like a moment of like clarity not clarity but like you know tom schwartz who offers very little to the show and has no seemingly that there's no like emotional intelligence seemingly on display there suddenly comes out with this really very articulate and accurate assessment i was like where did this come from because he's right i mean like it's come from a decade of being on tv this guy knows he's been in the you know he's been in the blogs for years about how he's talked to his wife and you know how he's reacted to things so a lot of this it's like is it emotional intelligence or is it just um you know media training because he's been through all this before because you know it's like he's like dude seriously this is your reaction on national tv like how stupid are you you know it's really bad when Jesse is telling Luke and he addresses Luke and Danny and he's like, guys, like, settle down.

49:51Jesse is like, guys, be a little nicer to a woman right now. Like, if Jesse's saying that, you know you're really, like,

49:58Ronnie Karam: you've gone too far. Yeah, he's telling Luke. He's like, you know, I mean, if Janet comes up with this feeling that she has from a past trauma, like, don't get defensive, you know? Don't get defensive, Luke. Because Luke's over there like, oh, yeah, what a rich story. Of course Janet comes up with something like this. Yeah, but also let's not give Jesse too much credit. We all know that was what Lacey told Jesse. You know, Lacey was like, Jesse, you better say this on camera because I'm not going to have you on camera saying any bullshit about this situation. Okay, and you better tell your friends how to act also.

50:34Well, I think Tom—

50:35Ronnie Karam: I guarantee this was Lacey's— That's true, and I think that also Tom putting it in that way made Jesse change. because Jesse started this off when he started telling the story. It was like, well, then why didn't she say that from the beginning? Like, why was she saying it's because of Jasmine or this and this? So he kind of started off with that attitude too. But then when Luke and Danny went, you know, gave their reactions and Tom was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Jesse's like, yeah, yeah. Be respectful, Luke. Don't get defensive. Jesse's a flip-flopper, you know? Jesse really gets off easy this season, I think.

51:10Ronnie Karam: He does. He really does. Well, you know, I'm sure he'll have a moment maybe next season. Tom is basically like, he's basically like, Danny and Luke are so quick to dismiss Janet's trauma, but we don't even really know what it's about. And I just feel like in these moments, it's just a nice time to just shut up and listen. And, you know, so let's bring it back. Okay. This is a beautiful day. Beautiful moment. We're here to celebrate you, Danny, and your testicles. So, yeah. So then we go to the ball scene, the vasectomy scene. So we go to Dr. Turek's office. And the reception, Zach is with Danny.

51:50Ronnie Karam: And the reception is like, okay, we've got your ID. We'll just bring you straight back to the exam room. And he's like, we're all black. Throw a prayer out for your boy and pour out some for the homies. And she just does not smile. Zach's like, yeah, know your audience. Zach is like, I'm sorry. They made me come here with him, but these views do not look like me. So then Danny is like, knowing how important this was for Nia, I'm absolutely 100 % glad that I did this. I think it takes a lot of pressure off of Nia, and we're so blessed. We're so happy. It feels complete. So kudos to this guy. So he's complimenting himself.

52:29Yeah. He's giving himself a big old pat on the back for

52:34Ronnie Karam: honoring one request of Nia's. And this absolutely does not take pressure off of Nia, because it adds pressure to Nia because all you're going to do is pester her for sex every five minutes of the day because you got this fucking thing. And it's like, I snip my balls for you, and you can't do this for me? That's what it's going to be like the rest of their lives. Yeah. So he goes in, and the nurse Valerie has to shave his taint, as we know. And then we go, which, you know, I was yelling at the tv shave your taint at home you know i just feel like that's something that every boy should learn yeah yeah yeah do get a waxing session maybe but um they shave him and then they uh they put him on nitrous and he's he's really impossibly more annoying on nitrous like most of the time i would think that like i thought he would just sort of be chill and be like hey Let's go.

53:27Let's go. But instead, he's like singing country music. And he's just being like, yee-hoo, yee-haw. Oh, I felt that. God, weren't we all so happy when he said, oh, I felt that. I was like, yes, justice. Justice for all of us.

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56:58Now it's time for Girls' Night.

57:00Ronnie Karam: Girls' Night! Girls' Night on the Valley! It's a sober night with Lala while she's crying that she just put down her dog right before this thing. What the hell? What kind of Girls' Night is this? Listen, I'm really sorry about your dog, and I really am sorry about your dog, because God knows when I'm going to have to go through that soon-ish. And I've lived it, and I would not wish that upon anybody. Do not invite me to Girls' Night right after you do it. please yeah yeah let me come to you and bring some pizza or something i'll support you but don't call it girls night make me get all dressed up fuck i know that was so sad so she sort of gives like a little eulogy for for lily and um and then she talks about how you know getting to seven years of sobriety is really hard and lily gave her life for her to have life it's all very actually quite lovely and then um now it's like let's talk shit you know so i was like my favorite part of Mexico and I'm not even joking Zach was your birthday and I know it was shit for you but it was so good and Michelle's like yeah it was so fun look at me still smiling ear to ear from all the fun I had at Bar of Gay and Zach's like oh it was great for me too I'm not gonna lie I was like buzzed enough and that I was fine with it like I didn't even mind getting knocked on the head i still think that's also shocking like i feel like he he could have been decapitated like i think it's crazy that injury you brought up the movie hereditary um yesterday while we were talking about in the city because you were saying owen from in the city looks like the girl from hereditary and that's a hereditary move that's the i was like why was i just thinking of hereditary because that's what happens to a character in Hereditary.

58:53Ronnie Karam: She gets on a double-decker bus in Mexico to take a bunch of straight people to a gay bar, and a sign knocks her head clean off. Toni Collette is like, let's go.

59:10I haven't seen Hereditary, but I do know about that. No, I knew about it already, because I'd already read the plot description, because I was fascinated.

59:19Ronnie Karam: This is a disturbing-ass movie. Oh, my gosh. But yeah, that's what I thought when I first saw that sign hitting Zach's. And that's terrible. I wouldn't be laughing if something really bad happened to Zach. But when that sign smacked him, I was like, oh, my God, it's the hereditary girl. Boom. It's rolling on the ground. Doesn't the hereditary girl also make weird clicking noises or something? Like, or something? I don't remember. I don't remember that part. I just remember that movie was extremely disturbing. And I remember that part of getting knocked with the sign on a double-decker bus on the way to a gay bar.

59:57Ronnie Karam: So they're just making small talk. And Zach's like, oh, my God, when that happened, I was like, should we FaceTime my hairstylist? I was like, can you please just like, you guys can't even see it. Can you see the cut? Which, shockingly, you really can't. like that hair does grow in fast and thick it's really impressive um so uh so then lala is like also i just want to say another thing that i loved was rooming with the girls um because like we did have like the best time and janet's like yeah and i did feel like all of us came together and like had like a nice like end of the trip you know and like michelle i was happy that you and lacy got along and after the trip i was like i can't lie i was like i like her and even like at the airport We were, like, joking around, and all of us were, like, eating at bubblegum shrimp, and, like, Lacey and I started following each other at the table, and then Zach and I had a thing, and, like, we followed each other for, like, five minutes.

1:00:51So, like, I guess I'm part of the group again now, right, guys?

1:00:54Ronnie Karam: Yeah, Janet's like, well, I mean, we followed each other for five minutes, I guess. I mean, I don't know. They're like, oh, yeah, Zach, so what's up? You unfollowed Janet right after the airport. And Ruth's like, oh, my God, yeah, you unfollowed. Why'd you do that? And Lala's like, at the airport on the way home, they had a funny and friendly banter. And Schwartz is like, let's slip a coin. And then if it lies on head, then you will have to follow Janet. And he's like, yeah, but like, you could see that I was uncomfortable. You know, I was visibly like, Janet, we are not there yet. Okay. I mean, following doesn't even really matter.

1:01:29Ronnie Karam: But I just like didn't feel like really comfortable. And then it takes him like an hour to make excuses about why he unfollowed Janet. it's going on and on and he's like i mean like i was just like it was very like visibly uncomfortable and like it's just too much you know and like i've always wanted to move forward with janet but like do i think that she's like put up multiple roadblocks uh to move forward like yes and like so she's like maybe taking that bestie to like the next level like girl let's come down so michelle's like um i love you but it's petty like you shouldn't have followed her right then and there if you weren't ready to do it.

1:02:05She's like, but I lost a bet. Like, you always have to order a bet, even with Tom Schwartz. She's like, yes, but you seem to have more fun when it's just you and Janet and no one else is around. And then when other people are around, then things seem to be a little different.

1:02:21Ronnie Karam: Yeah, Janet's like, but we were sharing fried shrimp. It was a sacred moment. I just don't get it. um so she's like i mean there's been times where we've been out with without others zach you know and kristin's like okay okay well like um he does have fun moments with her oh and i would like to make this very clear i texted both of them and i said if you guys become friends with janet again you can rekindle your own friendships that you had but our friendship does not change and i don't want that for myself okay i do not want that but you guys can do it because Brittany basically is like I think you mean if Kristen or Danny or Nia are there then that's not going to be lost to Janet so that's where Kristen's like no no no I never said that he can't be friends with Janet yada yada but he literally has acted that way you know on that bus in San Diego the other most miserable trip this cast really does do miserable trips my god this has been Kristen's game plan since we very first met her back in 2012 or so.

1:03:27Like, well, if you're going to be friends with him, you're going to be friends with her, then you can't be friends with her.

1:03:31Ronnie Karam: Yeah, make your choice. And we saw on the bus in San Diego when Janet was really going over the top trying to be friends with Zach and he was laughing with her. And Kristen's like, oh, well, I'm glad you're having fun with Janet. So I did like this though, because Lala says, listen, I do have a legitimate question for you, Christens. Like, at what point do we just acknowledge that no matter what Janet does for you, she can do no right because of things that happened in the past? Like, why are you holding on to it? Like, at some point you have to allow someone to evolve from their mistakes. And I like that Kristen was just like, yeah, I don't trust you.

1:04:12Ronnie Karam: I don't like you. You know? I wish people could just say that on these shows. it's not even at this point it's not some deep thing kristen and janet used to be real friends in real life beyond this show like besties beyond this show and kristen's like i just don't like you anymore and i think you know sometimes that's just all the answer you need you know no is a is a full sentence you know reality tv is is always funny because um it forces people to still interact long beyond their friendship has curdled and like in real life if you just don't like someone anymore. You just stop hanging out with me.

1:04:49You just don't see them anymore. And that's just, that's just it. But on reality TV, you have to still do social events that you would normally do with your friends over and over and over again. And so you wind up in these situations where it's like, there's like a cognitive dissonance of like, we are hanging out, but we're not getting along. And so we have to find a way to get along. So Janet is like, but why, why? And she's like, well, you like to hurt people and you want to be mean to people. And that's not someone I was ever friends with. I'm like, you were best friends with Stassi. And Katie.

1:05:18Do you not remember anything from Vanderpump Rules?

1:05:22Ronnie Karam: Yeah. She doesn't like her. What can you say? Yeah, just say I don't like her. I don't like you. So she's like, if the version of Janet existed that I was friends with, back in the day, I'd be friends with her. But, you know, when people show you who they are, aren't you supposed to believe them? I like that she brought up a little Maya Angelou. She's like, really? You want to fight with Maya Angelou? Ha, ha. My Angela's like, well, thank you for using one of my most famous lines. I was not expecting it to be a pivotal defense on the Valley, but sure. And also, I mean, you're with Luke. You know what I mean?

1:06:04Ronnie Karam: He showed you who his ass is multiple times. One thing that has to also be kind of acknowledged is that the people who hate Janet the most also are in the worst relationships. and so I have to imagine there's like you know for as much as Danny was saying that Janet went through trauma and is taking it out on him and he's like a punching bag I can't help but think that also Kristen and and Nia are taking it seems I would not be surprised if they're also taking out their frustrations in their relationships on Janet as well I'm not saying Janet is innocent in a situation but like it is kind of funny that they are in the two worst relationships on the show and they're both you know furious at janet because janet has sort of called them both out for certain things etc but um you know that parallel is there as well and so what's you know it's i guess what's interesting to me is that danny is almost complaining that he's being used as a punching bag when his wife and as well as kristen are kind of using janet as a punching bag as well.

1:07:12Ronnie Karam: Yeah. That's true. I wonder if that does have anything to do with it. Like they're being frustrated with your partner at home. Yeah, meaning that people are unhappy. And when you're unhappy it's like they don't want to take it out on well, Kristen's in an interesting situation because she actually does take it out on Luke as well. I think everything becomes a punching bag around Kristen. But I think with Nia especially, she doesn't want to turn her unhappiness back on Danny. Because she wants to preserve her household. So she is going to take it out on the person that she sees as the one that's causing this unhappiness.

1:07:47Which is, it's Danny, but she's going to say it's Janet.

1:07:51Ronnie Karam: I think Nia's upset because it's cracking their perfect relationship 100 % thing. Where they look perfect and this sweet little thing. And this person is coming in here and saying all this stuff that Danny did. you know and then the way she just kept harping on it and this and that made nia like well why are you why are you still talking about it why are you why are you talking about it so they just want to separate it and kristen's very much from the nia school she even said it on the show where like they that's the model relationship because they don't take it out on each other in public they do everything in private and that's how it should be and so she's kind of learning from them and trying i mean kristen's not very practiced at making a perfect looking relationship but she said that that's her goal and so i think that's why nia's just like done with it you know and then the stuff when janet was sitting her down like oh and if you're or janet when she's like well you know i was with someone with drug and alcohol problems and if you need help with that so i think that nia's just like no fuck this girl and kristin is gonna stay with her and they're gonna try and ice janet out of the show but you can't really do that when half the cast is still team janet like she still is half the cast so yeah it's not working you know and we these shows these shows struggle when there's two teams of people who refuse you know and they're just not entertaining enough to pull it off like jersey i mean jersey was hilarious i thought when they did it their last season i thought was really funny it was toxic but it was at least still funny whereas these people really can't pull that off and so they keep having the fight of why don't you like janet i just don't like janet that's it you know but like you said it's reality tv and they just got to keep they just got to keep shooting together yeah so uh janet is like what have i done to you and chris like well you treat people shitty and la's like but you can't say that you can't say that because i just told you how danny treated me and you said that's not your experience and chris is like i don't need to be pushed into doing anything janet's like well you don't have to be pushed into doing anything.

1:09:56And Jasmine is saying how she was struggling with this group and her therapist... Jasmine just has this rock and it's her worry stone, so she hands it to Janet or Lala. I don't know, but she basically says she has a rock that she rubs when she's anxious. It's a worry stone.

1:10:13Ronnie Karam: And then we see her when they were at that party outside and Kristen was like, don't talk. Don't talk right now. And we see her like, ding! It's like worry stone holding it like up against her face. Like, yeah, really using that worry, really using that worry stone. So Janet's like, I mean, as long as you guys realize this is why the group is shattered, I'm trying. And Kristen's like, well, my group isn't shattered. And, you know, Michelle's like, but this group is shattered. Absolutely. So Janet's like, well, you know, that's for the time being. I guess, well, that's just how it's going to be then.

1:10:51Ronnie Karam: Janet's been pretty good this season. The whole season about being like, okay, I'm going to turn this around. I'm sick of being the villain on this show, and I'm just going to go eat shit to every single person. And the stuff that's been happening with Danny has been his own doing. He's the one who keeps going around bringing it up. So it's weird to even stand up for Janet because I find her highly annoying as well. I would just be like, I don't like it. We're not compatible. Bye. But she's been pretty good at just eating shit and making everybody else look stupid. And Janet has not been on TV for a decade, but she's been around people who are on TV for a decade.

1:11:28Ronnie Karam: And, you know, they're up against a more formidable opponent. And I find it very hilarious than they think. And I find it pretty funny that Janet is going to outlast Nia and Danny. Because I don't, they're not coming back next year, right? I can't imagine them being back. I think they're going to come back. You do? What else are they going to, yeah. I 100 % think they're going to come back. I think they'll be back. What else are they going to do? Oh, God. I don't know quit or fired if they don't come back I don't think they'll be fired I think they'll come back because you know what Danny is a villain and he's obnoxious and terrible but he's he hasn't he hasn't crossed any bravo lines I think he's just sort of being a villain he's being a villain he doesn't realize he's being a villain which is why he's such a good villain because he actually thinks he's totally in the right.

1:12:24So I think he'll be back. And I think they'll do an apology to where he'll be like, I've grown. I was in a bad season of my life. And watching it back, it was difficult. But I was nervous about things. I feel bad. I think, like, what's their paycheck? They have no paycheck beyond this.

1:12:38Ronnie Karam: So they will make it work. Yeah, he does Walking Dead voiceover. I mean, he does voiceover work and stuff. I don't know. You know, I don't know what the pay is on that. But I don't know. I wouldn't imagine it's a lot on this show either. true but i think the expo still has the same hood that we saw in the first season okay update on that update on that so i was on i was on um i was on jeff lewis this week with janet and i confronted her about her low-hanging hood and i was like you did yeah it was actually we forgot to bring it up on the show but i was we were in the elevator together and i was like janet what's the deal with that low-hanging hood she goes oh my god jason hits his head on it every single day is the worst i was like i hate it can you fix it can you get a different one she's like oh i want to so it made me happy to know that she also hates that hood and like that they didn't actually intentionally i'm just glad they're not embracing that terrible low-hanging hood they didn't intentionally do it no that came with their house but still fuck that but i'm just saying it's the same hood you know what i mean i don't think this cast it's not like a real housewife show where if you do well the first season they're like okay here's a lot more money go get a bigger house or something you know yeah can i tell you something by the way this is nothing to do with the show but it does has everything to do with um stove oven things which is that yesterday i was uh i was boiling something on my stove and i turned the burner off and then i was like oh you know what i think i need to do this a little bit longer i want to turn it back on again nothing happened the entire oven and stove the entire range died it's just it just died it just died i was like you were on a second ago what happened i'm no furious so i've got someone coming in but like has that ever happened to you where your entire range just stops working like no lights no nothing it just was like i'm out i'm done that was it you didn't No, that's never happened.

1:14:33But that was a farewell boil.

1:14:35Ronnie Karam: Never. Only when the electricity has gone out. And I have a gas stove and it still wouldn't turn on. So what the fuck? And then I looked it up and it was like, you must have electricity to start this. Isn't that crazy? It's a gas range. And I looked it up. I was like, one thing you can do is you can look for this or that. I was like, no, I can't do any of this stuff. So I've got a guy coming in. He said either today or Monday is the window he gave me, which is really helpful. and um but i feel i feel like really angry at my stove i feel like there should have been like warning signs like weird noises happening or weird like oh it's taking longer to turn this on like i feel like i should have seen that this was coming but like you were just on and fully functional three seconds ago i think it's really going to show the power of janet i mean you came you went you met janet you told janet you're gonna be friends now then you go on an elevator her and tell her about her hood and then guess what happens your stove is out yep she's the power of it yeah she actually really likes her own low-hanging hood and she like lulled me into a state of complacency like oh good i'm glad she i'm glad she finally acknowledges that her hood is terrible and then she's like i know he'll say that on his recap and the audience will think that i'm on their side about the hood but secretly she's actually a very pro low-hanging hood and has cursed my oven yeah pretty much you fucked yourself on that one i did so uh now it's jasmine and melissa's engagement party and britney's like i'm so excited about tonight i'm a party planner i love buying a party so is that britney's thing now that she's going to be a party planner because they're really hammering that in this year it does seem like they are um Yeah, they're peppering that in.

1:16:22It's in there.

1:16:25Ronnie Karam: Well, congratulations to all the local chicken fingers vendors because your business is about to go through the roof. Raising Cane's is about to be raised itself because they're going to get a lot of orders. So people are showing up at this party. We see Jeremy Maddox and Allie Luber, some holdovers from Better Pub Rules. And then people show up. I saw Rachel Lindsay in the background Did you see Rachel back there? She was chatting around And so people show up And then Lala is like You know what's so wild you guys Anytime I go to anything where there's a straight couple Like a straight man and a straight woman Celebrating loves I'm always like this is going to end at some points But for this I feel like it's going to be a forever things I'm like lesbians You know Yeah that's what she's saying yeah love the lala hetero representation it's like yeah straight people don't last but those lesbians they're you all so uh they're like yeah they're gonna make it what a cute couple and uh lala's like thanks for last night i was in such a funk and michelle says i do not like being in the corner and zach dogging for 30 minutes i don't even understand his boy we just see a clip of Zach like yeah because like I couldn't really be your friend because like that's not like really true to me in that moment in the airport and like you know like flipping a coin like it's like totally different like just like couldn't come in at that moment and they just showed the funniest shot of while he's going on of like Michelle and she's just sitting there with that look on her face where her like teeth are sort of sticking out over her lower lip she's like and then she's looking left and right and left and right and down and left and right and I was like when is this going to zap So Lala's like I have yet to get an answer From Kristen or Zach That makes sense about what You have done to them personally To make themselves mad beyond the point of forgiveness Janet Janet's like well you know I've tried I've given it all My all both you know because I want peace And because I want peace when we're all together And I've done everything I feel like I can Try to get that at this point I'm just like I just have to let it be so this is also very shrewd to Janet because she's like, you know, she's the one who's trying here and they're not moving forward.

1:18:46So, oh well. You know, so this makes her look like the more mature one of the group. And so then Jasmine and Melissa arrive and Brittany's like, welcome to Bronx! Melissa and Janet! And she has like a little basket of chicken wings that she's just like throwing, like rose petals. And then

1:19:07Ronnie Karam: they're like little crawfish heads she's just throwing out of a plastic bag of juice um and so we see lacy and kristen chatting and lacy's asking about the party and um she's like i had to look at janet kristen was said this by the way not lacy she's like i had to look at janet and i was like listen i'm just not there yet janet okay it's like well it's fine people can like coexist together it's like what people do and Kristen's telling Jesse like oh yeah we had a girls dinner last night and Jenna was like what have I done to you in the last year and I said I don't trust you and Lacey's like yeah but like that's also like not really a fair argument because like one could argue then like what did Danny do to her and we've all been listening to it for a year so and Jesse's like that's what I said when we were in Mexico I was like what is Danny done to you and God it was so vulnerable It's the most vulnerable I've ever seen, Janet.

1:20:07Ronnie Karam: She talked about trauma and the door being closed in the pantry and was like, I said, why didn't you just say that all last year? And Chris was like, oh, Danny doesn't even know it. It's not like Janet's ever said, Danny, well, here's the thing. You know, I've not heard about any of this. And it's just odd to me that now it's coming out. Caw-caw. So then there's more group mingling. And Lacey is like elsewhere now with Jessie. And she's like. I'm so sorry. It just really bothers me, like the Christian's reaction too. Like just this is a point for you to just say, I know we don't get along. I heard about what you talked about.

1:20:45Ronnie Karam: And that's, you know, just to be like, ooh, gross. She's just bringing this up now. That's just gross. It's just gross behavior. But sorry, I called it out earlier for the guys, but not Christian. So yeah, make sure we got that. Make sure everyone. Yeah, everyone gets gets their comeuppance. so then uh lacy is like um she's like i have the best pickup line so you go up to a man and you say what's this material and then they say it's like cotton or silk and then i say if it's jesse i say ew change it to something nicer but someone else will go feels like husband material yeah i was gonna say you say that to jesse you don't want him like in your house you're not gonna marry jesse get out of here is she yeah do you think she's gonna marry jesse i think she will actually they've been together a while they have a good banter like she puts him in his place he seems to like it and he has she has money so he's gonna be down for whatever and i think that she seems to be entertained by him so yeah i think it's gonna happen because in the beginning of the season when he's like yeah you know i could move in she's like no oh never well they could still be married but she'll be like you have to stay up in west hollywood okay thanks but we'll still be married yeah so uh then we see miss melissa chatting with michelle britney and janet and thank you thanking them for coming well i guess that was oh so now we go to janet and jesse sorry so janet's like why are you sitting all alone can i tell you i just feel so happy to see you and lacy god isn't that weird i just love you and lacy now okay you're laying it on a little thick at this point this is janet's thing are we gonna be friends are we gonna be friends so Jesse is like yeah you know it's such a relief to me that the girls are like starting to give her like the opportunity like you know because like that was my biggest problem with people it just was like you know you like you calling Jason to block Lacey I like I know you're Michelle's friends but you're also my friend even though I'm not been nice to you all season long so Janet's like yeah that was petty of me and I'm sorry and like my only regret now is not getting to know Lacey sooner I mean do you know how how much fun we could have had in my kitchen having someone who is shorter than the kitchen hood finally a real conversation without the threat of violence and he's like uh i i like what janet is saying but can i trust it is it real do i think it's sincere nope so then lacy comes in who always has an alternative yes so lacy comes in and janet's like oh i was just love you now game night are you gonna come to game night besties yeah and um lacy's like oh my god wow this is so nice you're saying nice things about me and she's like yeah you know now that i've gotten to know you i've seen um you know that like like you know that you're awesome and lacy's like yeah we're like angels from hell or heaven so jesse's like oh shit like i don't think i like this anymore and janice like you want to plan a double date soon he's like whoa baby steps Whoa, whoa, whoa.

1:23:54Now Brittany gets on the microphone and says, everyone, I would like to welcome the brides to me. And so here come Melissa and Jasmine. Melissa's wasted. She's like, everyone, who do you want to say it's the right to the ear? That was funny. I like the potatoes. Potatoes, look at how big, why do they call it twice baked potato? Why did you bake it twice? You know what I'm saying?

1:24:17Ronnie Karam: If anyone's science, you want to do this? And Jasmine's like, okay, okay. Thanks for coming, everybody. Thanks for coming. Thanks, Brittany, for doing this. This has been really amazing. I would like to thank the sponsor that Brittany got, Mountain Dew. Everybody's been enjoying the special Mountain Dew cocktails. Make sure you have some of those Mountain Dew Spanakopitas. They're really delicious.

1:24:46Ronnie Karam: Don't forget the free don't buy, y 'all. Okay, yep. Thanks, party planner, Brittany. Okay. The fact that you're all here, I mean, it just really shows you guys care about us. So, like, thank you, Zach. Zach, do you want to say something? It's like, oh, my God, we're doing a speech. This is crazy. Okay. Hi, everybody. I just wanted to tell you, like, I did play a coin game where, like, I flipped a coin and then I said I would follow Janet. But then I really didn't feel comfortable following Janet. Like, it's too soon. You know what I mean? And, like, you shouldn't be forced to make decisions in an airport.

1:25:17Ronnie Karam: That's, like, crazy. There are things flying above your head. People need to concentrate. I didn't even get to bring liquid through. Like, why do I have to make this decision right now? Okay, I'm going to fan myself in that counterintuitive way where I spread all my fingers apart, but still fan myself. Because, you know, realistically, if you bring your fingers together, you get a better breeze. But whatever, all the fingers will be apart. I'm going to fan myself. I just want to say this year has been very difficult. I lost my monster fridge. But when you lose a monster fridge, there's more room in your life for a non-monster to come in.

1:25:50So, Melissa, welcome. I'm so excited for both of you. I'm really, really happy. She's like, okay, thanks. Thanks so much. And Jasmine is like, thank you, Bungie, for laughing, for clapping, for supporting me. Thank you.

1:26:09Ronnie Karam: Benty does, too. He's so cute. Everything Zach says, I'm adorable. Oh, he just smiles up at him. Like, oh, that was a good one, Zach. Benji is so cute, but I also love that he totally is like, he's like the dominant one in that household. He's like, you will give a speech right now, Zach. Like, you know, he's totally bossing Zach around. So Jasmine then gives a nice little speech saying, you know, she didn't think she would ever find Melissa or whatever. But she's like, Melissa is so special. I've never met someone who literally is just the perfect human and I feel safe with her. and with all my walls are down.

1:26:44Oh gosh, she had to get

1:26:46Ronnie Karam: the Bachelor stuff in there. I loved that. I feel so vulnerable. Yeah, she got it in there like right at the end. Don't forget. I'm vulnerable, you guys, and my walls are down. I was like, yes! Once a Bachelor contestant, always a Bachelor contestant. And the production is like, well, we're not going to film your wedding, but we will put some random photos from Instagram up on screen and that's all you get. Jasmine, congratulations this is the closest you will have to having an episode centered around you this season so here you go and good night and good luck yeah that was sweet now we're gonna go cast Jax back on this show so we can see him having sex with his manager yeah exactly so that was the episode everyone thanks all for being here yeah Daniel can you look at my wife look at your wife look at your wife look at your wife yeah you had to say some like vaguely positive things about Janet and I'm surprised that I didn't have to step in and be like Ronnie look at me can you look at your wife?

1:27:51Ronnie Karam: no like she really is playing it very well you know I'm gonna call people out when they're doing something wrong but I mean she's actually playing she's playing it pretty well lately with her just like oh my god Lacey is that Lacey Oh my god, it's lazy She's really She's really doing it up I mean, they all just need to become friends again So people can get messy Because, you know But at the end of the day The mess is what we love the most You know, I don't consider people like Danny Being messy, I just consider that Like, disgusting and like Emotionally abusive I don't find that fun But I find the first two seasons you know especially the first one when they were fighting over like well you said that michelle you know you can't trust michelle because you know of politics and then they had to fight over that whole thing and the don't say gay or whatever like that's stuff i can get into you know there was there was a moment in this episode by the way where janet was like trying to question why zach was having such a hard time following her she was like i mean what did i ever do to zach i'm like well you did isolate him in the first season and make sure he was like not invited to group trip that's the thing then and then act like he was going to murder you in big bear exactly and that's the you know acting like oh my god zach you know he wants me to lose my baby and all this other stuff that was going on it's you know that's the thing is the audience really does have kind of a their memory you know we all it's like me when i watch below deck and you say what what about last season's blow deck remember that person i'm like no because i erase it out of my memory you know when you watch so many reality shows i think people's memories are pretty short um so that's why i need it's like janet's doing a good reset season you know yeah and there are just worse people right now and danny is the worst you know coming behind really all of the guy luke and then messy jesse behind them so you know just make friends And so we can get back to Janet and Kristen and Michelle and Brittany and those people fighting.

1:30:02Ronnie Karam: Because ultimately I'm more interested in that than guys being douchebags to their wives and partners. And bring on a new couple for sure. Yes. I think Lala has been really great this season. And I think that without her, this season would have been a little rougher for me. I think she was really, really great. but I think I did not love overall as a concept Bravo going to Lala and Tom Schwartz as new additions because it just felt like we need to bring in new talent and new people and fresher things here. So I like Lala as a Bethany Frankel type classic, a Bethany Frankel type to go and call people out on their shit.

1:30:43But we need to actually have a new couple that's doing something interesting here.

1:30:49Ronnie Karam: yeah well from your lips to god's ears honey let's hope the bravo gods are listening all right everybody thanks so much for being here it's been good times we are going to do a next gen nyc and then for tomorrow real housewives of orange county the fun keeps on happening bye everyone bye watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors ain't no thing like Alison King. Our way is the Amber way. It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. It's Always Automatic with Ashley Otto. Put your hands together for Carly Clapp. Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt. She's not just a Sheila, she's a Daniela.

1:31:32Ronnie Karam: Itchles! We never miss her call, it's Diane Call. Big yay, it's Emily Gauthier. Erin McNicholas, she don't miss no trick-a-less. Hava Nagila Weber. You'll never hide from Heidi Eleanor Jones. It's no BS, We love Hugo ES. Jamie, she has no last naming. Sips some scotch with Jessica Trotch. She's our favorite streamer, Caroline Peacock. Kristen the Piston Anderson. She gets an A from us, it's Lindsay D. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino. Fresh as a daisy, it's Maisie McHenry. Come again? We're obsessed with Margaret O 'Halloran. Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the Berg. Gather round for the lore of Michelle Moore.

1:32:14Ronnie Karam: This is Livin' with Michelle Vivian. I love-a-ya, Olivia Williamson. She's the lady of the house, it's Rachel Sherouse. She sure is swell, it's Raquel. Yes, we canna, it's Sadana. Cast a spell with Shannon Spellman. Let's share with Sharon Eldridge. Darn Skippy, it's Tippi. And our super premium sponsors. She's VVIP, it's Amanda V. Somebody get us 10 cc's of BetsyMD. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Caitlin O 'Neill Put us on a stretcher, it's Charlotte Fletcher Don't get salty with Christine Pepper Can't have a meal without the Emily sides Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall We got our wish, it's Jen Plish My favorite Murdo, Karen McMurdo Let's get savage with Laura Wildman In the study with a candlestick, it's Leslie Peacock We're ride or die for Lisa Ryder Barron She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthy Always killin' it, it's Lola Alkalani Roger that, it's Marlis Rogers The incredible edible Matthews sisters She eases our woes, it's Melissa St.

1:33:24Ronnie Karam: Rose There's a chance of meatballs, it's Rebecca Cloud She's our princess, it's Rebecca Prince She's the queen bee, it's Sarah Lemke We cannot tell a lie, it's Sarah Talafson Shannon, out of a cannon, Anthony Please don't stop, it's Soli and Pop Let's take off with Tamela Plain. Strike a pose, it's Tori Rose. She ain't no shrinking Violet Kuchar. We love you guys. This episode is sponsored by Michaels, one of our very favorite places in the entire world to shop. This is a true story. One time I thought I was walking into an entirely different store and I was like, wow, they have really upped their crafting game in here.

1:34:04And then I realized it was Michaels and I was so happy. Have you ever accidentally walked into a Michaels? It's a dream.

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1:34:47Ronnie Karam: Visit Michael's in-store or shop online now. Michael's everything to celebrate anything. This is Hannah Burner, the co-host of Giggly Squad. We could all just stay in bed scrolling through other people's vacations forever, but where is the fun in that? The best memories come from stepping outside of your little bubble and being open to the unexpected. And what better way to be open to the unexpected than finally booking that trip to Europe? You guys know I'm a Delta girly. Every time I go, I get my Delta headphones. And when I fly to Europe, Delta treats me like a queen and they'll treat you too.

1:35:25I was always a little nervous about navigating a foreign country, but then I realized it's so important to grow and see different cultures and to put yourself in different situations. and Delta held my hand the whole time. Being away just helps you put life into perspective and your little worries are not so bad. Travel really is the best way to discover something new about yourself and grow from the experience. Step outside your comfort zone this summer, get some Delta headphones and fly with Delta Airlines. They truly are the best way to get to Europe and they just make the whole journey feel so comfortable and seamless.

1:36:00Go book your next chapter right now at Delta.com. As a fitness coach, my active psoriatic arthritis can slow me down. With SkyRizzy, Rizzen Kizumab RZA, I'm treating my skin and joint symptoms so I can keep moving. SkyRizzy, a prescription-only injection for adults, helps me move with less joint pain, stiffness, swelling, and fatigue. And for those who have plaque psoriasis, 90 % clearer skin is possible. With SkyRizzy, there's no daily dosing. It's just four doses a year after two starter doses. Don't use if allergic to SkyRizzy. Serious allergic reactions, increased infections, or lower ability to fight them may occur.

1:36:38Before treatment, get checked for infections and tuberculosis. Tell your doctor about any flu-like symptoms or vaccines. Thanks to SkyRizzy, there's nothing like clearer skin and better movement. And that means everything.

1:36:53Ask your doctor about SkyRizzy. Visit SkyRizzy.com or call 1-866-SKYRizzy to learn more.

1:37:04Thank you.