#3562 RHOSLC S7E3: I Left My Toothbrush in San Francisco - Live in KC!

0:00Ronnie Karam: I got these bar stools from Article and they fit my mid-century modern space so well. There's nothing cheap about these. They are sturdy. They are heavy. They've got leather seats. And the best thing, I got to pick them out and they were brought into my home and put together by Article in the room that I wanted. Everything else was taken out of there. It looks so good. So thanks, Article.

0:23Ben Mandelker: I'm not surprised. You know why, Ronnie? Because Article makes it effortless to create a stylish, long-lasting home at an unbeatable price.

0:31Ronnie Karam: There's a curated collection for every style. They have a curated range of mid-century modern, coastal, scanty-inspired pieces that not only shine on their own, but also pair seamlessly with nearly any other Article product.

0:44Ben Mandelker: Yeah, I mean, they've got quality without compromise. They take great care in curating their collections. You know, they focus solely on high-quality, meaningful pieces that will stand the test of time. And with Article, there's no filter. Every item is chosen for its craftsmanship, design, and lasting value.

1:00Ronnie Karam: Article offers fast, affordable shipping across U.S. and Canada with options for professional assembly if you prefer a hands-off experience, which I do. I do.

1:10Ben Mandelker: Article is offering our listeners$50 off your first purchase of$100 or more.

1:15Ronnie Karam: To claim, visit article.com slash crappens and the discount will be automatically applied at checkout.

1:21Ben Mandelker: That's article.com slash crappens for$50 off your first purchase of$100 or more.

1:26Ronnie Karam: There is such a better way to spend your time than doom scrolling or watching terrible TV. Get some stories in your life, okay? Audible is perfect for that. I use it while I'm cleaning the house, while I'm running errands. I listen to books all day, every day with Audible.

1:45Ben Mandelker: Yeah, they have a massive library of audiobooks and ad-free podcasts. And it is really the perfect thing to turn on when you're taking a long drive, washing some dishes, like enrich yourself.

1:56Ronnie Karam: New members can start listening with a 30-day free trial at audible.com slash WWC.

2:12These are the best days of our lives Just for each of our glasses I This one's for you tonight Sweet life, the peach life Sweet life, the peach life

2:41Now what else is going on? That's my opinion! Goodbye, Carl!

2:48Ben Mandelker: Watch what crap is, watch what crap is Who cares what happens when there's so much crap is

3:03Maze

3:09Ben Mandelker: Coordine Cuyu Beach Beach Ge Tan

3:22bob

3:28Hello. Hello, Kansas City. Hello.

3:35Ben Mandelker: Welcome to the kickoff night of the In The Mix tour.

3:41Ronnie Karam: First night. First night, you guys.

3:44Ben Mandelker: First night back. Real quickly, are there any McBees in the audience? Great. Has anyone killed any chickens recently? Okay, it's a safe house.

4:00Ronnie Karam: Safe space. It's a safe spot. You guys, this is a magical place, Kansas City. It is. Literally today, we were walking. We went to eat. Oh, my God. We went to have coffee at this really good place. And we're walking down the road, and Ben said, what is that man doing to that pigeon?

4:22Ben Mandelker: It's true, because there was a pigeon in the middle of the street walking on the double yellow lines, and there was someone... It was drunk. It was Shannon Bedore. Oh, well. I'm just going to take a little walk. A little hoo-hoo. What, David?

4:42Ben Mandelker: The pigeon was just walking, and there was a guy... I don't know what the term is, but he had the yellow...

4:48Ronnie Karam: A trying to picker-upper guy.

4:49Ben Mandelker: Yeah, he had the yellow sanitation worker, yellow shirt, and he had the prong with the picker-upper thing, the claw you know you don't want to get your hands dirty so he was trying to pick up this pigeon and ben's like what is that guy doing to the pigeon he had a trash bag and he had the claw around the back of the pigeon in the middle and i was like are you gonna throw the pigeon in the trash

5:12Ronnie Karam: and it was one of those moments like do we interfere because like what do you do like if it's a kid you know like that you are abusing that child you know you're supposed to say something yeah we're like terrorism see something say something or like do we say something i mean it's a pigeon you know so he had this big moral quandary and i was like maybe he's helping the pigeon you guys he was helping the pigeon he was actually the pigeon he was guiding the pigeon with the claw he was limping how the pigeon got that way i don't know get out of the road first

5:42Ben Mandelker: of all i know he guided the sweet little pigeon to the sidewalk got it onto the sidewalk and then he just walked away and we're like Kansas City.

5:53Ronnie Karam: It's a magical place. Also Not every city you would see that. Where we're from, you get the fucking thing with the trash thing, you bang it on the head, you throw it in the... We love

6:04Ben Mandelker: coming to the Midwest. The Midwesterners are so nice. Paula, where's Paula? That's you Paula. Paula brought a giant tin of cookies for us. Thank you. Paula! And then someone, I don't know if this was you too, Paula, but someone brought me Ina Garten socks.

6:25Ronnie Karam: Is that you? Thank you. And Bueller socks.

6:28Ben Mandelker: And Bueller socks.

6:29Ronnie Karam: Oh my God.

6:30Ben Mandelker: We have to represent the true queen here. I have to say, I don't know if you guys saw my Instagram stories from yesterday, but I went through hell and high water to get here. And it's been all worth it for just these socks. I'll tell you that much.

6:45Ronnie Karam: Socks and cookies. Yeah. Way to a man's heart. Yes. Well, I was leaving the hotel today to get some water right by me. There's a convenience store. And I walked out and there was a wing bone, a chicken wing bone just on the ground. I thought, man, birds really have it rough in this fucking town. What are you doing?

7:06Ben Mandelker: That bird was on the road because it's like, please, there's a giant predator on this sidewalk. The road is my safety. And now, oh, well.

7:14Ronnie Karam: Welcome to Watch What Crappings

7:21Ronnie Karam: Tonight We're recovering You guys It's not that dire Can you tell I'm nervous? I can't believe I'm fucking nervous It's exciting How long has it been? It feels like it's been 30 years

7:35Ben Mandelker: I know We haven't done a live recap Since last year Look, everyone loves you We're going to do it. We're going to do this. You are the most pessimistic person ever about recapping.

7:49Ronnie Karam: Is Galena here? Is Galena here from McBee Dynasty? God damn it. I shouldn't have asked that. I'm going to be upset before we even started. Galena, I know you are close. Always feel free to come to me.

8:05Ben Mandelker: Wait, did anyone here watch Big Brother? You know the red-headed girl, Hayley? You know, she's a local, right? She was on my flight yesterday. I will say that. And the flight, we missed our connection, and I did not tell her about the new flight that I got on.

8:26Ronnie Karam: Damn.

8:28Ben Mandelker: I didn't like her.

8:31Ronnie Karam: The pigeon got more respect than this point.

8:34Ben Mandelker: I would have had that pigeon on my Southwest flight, but I was not going to get thongs. Point is, previously on the Wheelhouse Wines, I'm so excited. Welcome to Operate Ski with Lisa B. Yay.

8:54I love skiing. It's so chic. Jessica Albee taught me to ski. Stop lying, Lisa. In this sisterhood, we do not lie. I'm so sick of being bullied. I'm sick of it. I'm a ski. I'm a skier. I ski.

9:15Ben Mandelker: No one lies more than Lisa Barlow. I am Greek.

9:22If by liar you mean skier then you're right. I ski. Watch. Oh my god I hate skiing. Get me down this hell. I want to introduce you guys to the new girl, someone who is like a real sister to me, and I won't betray her in less than one episode. Hi,

9:50Ronnie Karam: I'm Kwai. My husband looks like Rush Limbaugh and has a mystery job somewhere in Florida that I know nothing about, and I own a mountain and I ride a motorcycle. I'm that girl. I will not be skiing because I have a toddler at home. Oh yeah? Well, I have a new boyfriend at home. I hired him on Angie's list years ago. He cheated on me and I just hired him again from Angie's list.

10:27well I have a new boyfriend too and his name is model and he is not old and gross like Todd and he does get boners and it's a new chapter for me

10:42well I have a new relationship too with alcohol

10:54Murdered I called you a cut fitness and a bitch And said I hated you It was at a drag brunch It wasn't me It was the devil The devil's name Was alcohol That's a cheap excuse and I do not accept your apology. But I love your facelift. And your wig. I do not wear a wig. Bad margarita, bad.

11:34Ben Mandelker: Guys, guys, let Meredith work through her feelings. Shut up lying, Lisa Barlow. No one lies more than Lisa Barlow. I am Greek. You already said that. Liar. Everyone's bullying me.

11:51Ben Mandelker: and scene

11:56Ronnie Karam: so much goes on on that

11:59Ben Mandelker: show so much by the way could you guys remember we forgot to remind you to make sure the zoom is recording back for the thing we have not been on the road for a long time so we gotta make sure everything is recording right now thank you very much thank you alright everyone let's get into Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, season seven, episode three, Little Green Leprechaun, Big Dirty Secret. Aww. It's a big dirty secret. You know what? Some secrets are small. Some are really big, okay? That's a big leprechaun. Fucking Heather.

12:41Whoa.

12:42Ben Mandelker: I didn't know that lepers could be cons, but whoa, anyone could be a criminal. I'll tell you what, if anyone's going to call anyone, it's going to be a leper. He'll be like, your arm's falling off? You don't get$5 from me. He said he had a hand, but guess what? It fell off. Sounds like a con job to me.

13:06Ronnie Karam: Okay, Ben has been out of town and didn't get to even recap the last Real Housewives of Salt Lake City.

13:13Ben Mandelker: I know, it was very sad. Well, I'm excited because I feel like this is the third episode of the season, and the first one was a very serious, moving episode, and then I missed last week. And so now I'm like, oh, it's the first super fun episode I get to dive into. So I'm excited. I'm also curious about this Kwai woman. Why is she not a full-time housewife? Do we know why? Well, I Kwai know that her fashion is really bad. What'd she say? I Kwai. What'd she say? I'll tell you why she dresses terribly I'm assuming something terrible is going to come out about her And Bravo's like yeah we got to order her We're just waiting for that to happen

13:54Ronnie Karam: Yeah her first scene where she's like oh yeah I'm married to this guy No idea what he does Somewhere in Florida he's never really here He's in Florida No idea and you see the guy he's like Jail You're going to jail

14:09Ben Mandelker: She's going to jail

14:09Ronnie Karam: I feel like a judge in a Tom Cruise movie Like I already know the crime is going to happen Your ass is going to prison Rush You like literally can't even handle the truth Yeah That's a different Tom Cruise movie What's the one that he saw into the future? Minority Report Yeah Minority Report It sounds like a walk in the neighborhood with Vicky Yeah More like John Jansen Report

14:41Ronnie Karam: Do you belong here? Do you belong here?

14:44Ben Mandelker: I feel uncomfortable. I feel uncomfortable. I don't know what it is. I just feel uncomfortable.

14:50Ronnie Karam: All right. Okay. We go to a bar named Sue. No. Already no.

14:57Ben Mandelker: Don't they have enough suing that happened on this show? So we're at this place. It's like a real, like, you know, you show up on your hog. and in fact, Kwai shows up on her hog, shows up on her motorcycle and takes off her helmet and her hair is like Leanne locking around and stuff.

15:15Ronnie Karam: I'm Kwai. I have a motorcycle. Whitney becomes a bar named Sue. I can't. Every time I see that, I get angry. Why do I get angry? I have an aunt named Sue. Do you think that she wants to be a bar? She doesn't. So we see them arriving and then we go to Heather and Lisa and they're shopping. This is that scene. Every season, this show starts over again where Heather's like, me and Lisa Barlow, we're just like sisters. And then she just stabs her in the back and be praised her every two seconds. So we're having that kind of scene.

15:50Ben Mandelker: And they're in some boutique where they're always like pawing through some shirts next to like a Jamba Juice. They're like, yeah, so what's new with you? Yeah, it's so good to see you. And Lisa's like, yeah, these looks, they're curated for the Oscars. Oh my God, are the Oscars even this weekend? I don't even know when they are. Are you going to the Oscars, Lisa Marlow? No, normally I do. Like I famously always, they wanted me to be a presenter at the Oscars this year. You know, and I was like, I would be so perfect for one battle after another. It's like being on this cast or Sinners. But unfortunately, I just couldn't make it.

16:30Ben Mandelker: Yeah. Wait, you go to the Oscars, Lisa Barlow? Yeah, yeah. I do the red carpet. I present. I win. I've got like five Oscars that I've won. Yeah. Name one Oscar film. Lawrence of Serbia. Chariots of Water. Schindler's Notepad. All right, I'll give you that one. I'll give you that one.

16:59Ronnie Karam: um by the way notepad is good that's like the 2026 version of schindler's list like our attention spans are so gone it's just like schindler's schindler's sticky schindler's sticky there was a couple of people they got in trouble all right roll the credits we've got tiktok

17:15Ben Mandelker: tiktok attention spans but also like what like rando boutique in the strip mall down like three stops down from Beauty Lab and Laser has looks that are curated for the Oscars. Yeah, yeah, Blake's going to be in here shopping soon.

17:36Ronnie Karam: I'll take an awesome blossom. I'll wear an awesome... That is an onion ring meal, man.

17:42Ben Mandelker: And then, you know, Heather sort of has turned into the villain on this show, which I'm totally down for, but I was on her side when she just looked at Lisa like, hmm? And she had this look and she just kept it and they kept cutting back to it. They went to a whole other scene and then they flashed back at, meanwhile at the boutique, and it was still out there going, hmm?

18:02Ronnie Karam: They went back to see. I'm trying to be nice to you, Lisa Barless. Like, what? I go to the Oscars. I've been invited. I'm invited every year. I totally go. I'm there right now. Yeah. Hi. Yeah. Would like to thank my agent, Ben Affleck, Matt Duman, whatever. I don't care. Thank you so much. It's such hard work.

18:21Ben Mandelker: Yeah, it's great. I love being there. So we see Mary and she's overseeing a housekeeper or a cousin preparing snacks.

18:34Ronnie Karam: You know that that person is not being paid. Mary is going to stay problematic. She has real horrible things going on in her life. That does not automatically make you a better person.

18:46Ben Mandelker: Yeah.

18:48Ronnie Karam: And God bless her for it. This poor cousin, this distant cousin. Mary's probably got her passport or her credit card or something hidden.

18:56Ben Mandelker: She's just trying to put out some better cheddars. And Mary's like, uh-uh, not like that.

18:59Ronnie Karam: Not like that. Mary's like, do it with love. And she's like, uh, like this. No, no, I'll do it. You have to do it with love. And then Mary just slams them on the plate too. They're not crackers that line up well on a plate.

19:13Ben Mandelker: They're not. They're not. They're not ergonomic. Well, that's not even ergonomic. But they're not ergonomic either. So then we go back to Heather and Lisa, and Heather goes, so you really been invited to the Oscars? And you just never went? No, it's like hard. It's like work. Like when you're a big person like me, it's really difficult. It's not just like glamour. It's like people needing things. It's hard. It's hard. So can I have your ticket for the sisterhood? No, it doesn't work like that. You don't understand. You don't understand people like me. You're too small. Little people don't understand big awards.

19:53Ben Mandelker: So then we go back to Mary's house, and she talks about how she's been compartmentalizing since the passing of her son, and she's just trying to throw herself back into... Did you say Mary or Meredith? Mary. It scared me. I'm also compartmentalizing into a bathtub.

20:11Ronnie Karam: Because Meredith is good. Meredith finally comes out of the closet this season about so many things. Yeah. She's a DJ. We've never heard about it before. Finally, she's like, well, I have something new. I'm a DJ. We know, girl.

20:32Ronnie Karam: I got facelifts. We know. You've had a facelift every year. Why are you pretending you just got your first facelift? She's hilarious. She's like, well, I think it's very important for a woman to speak. When she has a facelift. You have been speaking for 19 years on this show. And every time it's with a different face. And it's better each time. Who is her doctor? You look amazing.

20:56Ben Mandelker: I know. She really is. They're doing great work there. The wig work may need some improvement. But the face is killing it. You know, the wigs. That's okay. Wigs can be changed. They can be shifted. They can fall off. It's okay.

21:09Ronnie Karam: Did you see today someone was like, oh, Meredith's doll hair. Whatever. They were making fun of her wig. They're like, I hate Meredith. And she's like, oh, well, every woman who's ever been on this show has worn a wig. I am so sorry that you're so offended and bored.

21:30Ben Mandelker: I feel like she does that at Starbucks, too. Here's your grande. Well, I'm sorry that I ordered a grande. Like, everyone's done it before.

21:39Ronnie Karam: Okay. We're not even there yet. I'm just jumping down here. Okay, so now we go back to Heather and Lisa shopping. No, we don't. What are we talking about a motorcycle?

21:49Ben Mandelker: Yeah, we're at Angie. Angie and Mary's like, you know, it's sad.

21:54Ronnie Karam: Okay, so Bron...

21:55Ben Mandelker: Well, Angie comes in, by the way. We love Angie, but she comes in with this orchid, and she has a giant picture of Robert there. And I was like, Angie. And Mary's like, I can't do photos too soon. It's just too soon. And Angie's like, uh-huh. Like, take the photo off, Angie.

22:12Ronnie Karam: She faces the photo away from her. She just turns the orchid. She's like, but it is an orchid.

22:20Ronnie Karam: Okay, well, thanks for the flower. I'll get the picture out of here. So it's actually a really nice scene, and they're still friends. I can't wait to see what happens in this one. And you know it's going to be something stupid, because Mary just gets upset in a relationship over the craziest things. Do you remember when she got really upset with Whitney because she was calling Whitney like 10 times a day, and Whitney was doing carpool? and she's like, how dare you? Little girl.

22:50Ben Mandelker: So, obviously, actually, I think in that moment it was the bobblehead, I don't know what it was, but Angie... Little girl. Little girl, bobblehead, two great Mary Cosby-isms. So, Mary's basically like, so, what have I been missing? And Angie's like, well, you know how Lisa invited everyone to go non-Greek skiing. So, Lisa brought her friend Ashley and introduce her to the group and Mary already is like, please tell me she's better than Brittany.

23:20Ronnie Karam: Please. That reaction. If she's anything like Brittany. Mandy's like, ha ha ha ha. Greek laugh, Greek laugh. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha. Then we go to Bronwyn, Ashley and Whitney back at a bar named Sue and Ashley's Kwai. I have to call her Kwai. Why do they call her Ashley? You can't call someone Kawhi and then start calling them Ashley, too. It's Kawhi. You're going to go with Kawhi, go with Kawhi. If I came up to you and I'm like, my name's Ronnie, but call me Steve. Fuck, who are you?

23:52Ben Mandelker: This is probably why Kawhi is not a full-time housewife. They couldn't figure out what her name would be in the titles. Like, you know what? Just tell her. She's not. That's what I was saying before. She's full-time. She's a friend of? She is a friend of, and it's weird.

24:09Ronnie Karam: It is weird.

24:10Ben Mandelker: She feels very full time. And so I'm wondering, like, are we going to see a lot of her and then she'll peter off? Does she quit halfway through? Or is it like something problematic is going to come out about her that Bravo knows? And I was like, OK, we're waiting. That Rush Limbaugh has been prison.

24:22Ronnie Karam: It's time for a commercial. It's time for a Crappens commercial. I got these bar stools from Article and they fit my mid-century modern space so well. There's nothing cheap about these. They are sturdy. They are heavy. They've got leather seats. And the best thing, I got to pick them out, and they were brought into my home and put together by Article in the room that I wanted. Everything else was taken out of there. It looks so good. So thanks, Article.

24:53Ben Mandelker: I'm not surprised. You know why, Ronnie? Because Article makes it effortless to create a stylish, long-lasting home at an unbeatable price.

25:00Ronnie Karam: There's a curated collection for every style. They have a curated range of mid-century modern, coastal, scanty-inspired pieces that not only shine on their own, but also pair seamlessly with nearly any other Article product.

25:13Ben Mandelker: Yeah, I mean, they've got quality without compromise. They take great care in curating their collections. You know, they focus solely on high-quality, meaningful pieces that will stand the test of time. And with Article, there's no filter. Every item is chosen for its craftsmanship, design, and lasting value.

25:29Ronnie Karam: Article offers fast, affordable shipping across U.S. and Canada with options for professional assembly if you prefer a hands-off experience, which I do. I do.

25:39Ben Mandelker: Article is offering our listeners$50 off your first purchase of$100 or more.

25:44Ronnie Karam: To claim, visit article.com slash crappens and the discount will be automatically applied at checkout.

25:50Ben Mandelker: That's article.com slash crappens for$50 off your first purchase of$100 or more.

25:55Ronnie Karam: There is such a better way to spend your time than doom scrolling or watching terrible TV. Get some stories in your life, okay? Audible is perfect for that. I use it while I'm cleaning the house, while I'm running errands. I listen to books all day, every day with Audible.

26:14Ben Mandelker: Yeah, they have a massive library of audiobooks and ad-free podcasts. And it is really the perfect thing to turn on when you're taking a long drive, washing some dishes. Like, enrich yourself.

26:25Ronnie Karam: New members can start listening with a 30-day free trial at audible.com slash WWC. Okay, so the friend of is like, wow, Bronwyn and Whitney, how did you guys meet? And they're like, um, Lisa, Lisa. I better luck with people that Lisa introduces me to. I do it, Lisa. But we're going to see how this works out with Lisa.

26:55Ronnie Karam: Bob poking her in the eye. Bob scratching her face. Yeah, well, we should really get out a whiteboard for me here because Whitney does like Kwai, and I do like Whitney, but also Kwai likes Lisa, and I do not like Lisa, so strike one, and we're mixing math and sports metaphors here, and I do want to know that, like, you know Kwai, Kwai enjoys Lisa's company, and I don't enjoy Lisa's company, but I do like Todd. Todd has a company, but I did get divorced from him. He was farting. He farted near Kwai once, and Kwai did not like that, so I like that Kwai did not like Todd's farts, so that's good, but she likes Lisa's fart so that's bad.

27:25So yeah, that's it.

27:31Ronnie Karam: You need a whiteboard to say she likes Lisa, I don't like Lisa. Yeah. So Ashley's like, well guys Lisa's my friend, okay, and I'm never turning against Lisa Barlow no matter what anybody said. Every person that Lisa Barlow has brought on this show has turned on her within a year. Do you think it's going to happen with this one? Well, Whitney's working hard to make sure it doesn't.

27:56Ben Mandelker: I'll say that much. So Bronwyn's like, you know, I have said awful things about Lisa. I've also nodded my head a lot about Lisa. And she refuses to get a bob. She just has long straight hair. I don't know how I could be friends with someone without a bob. It's going to be hard. But, you know, the things that Lisa said about Todd were just like way too far, too inappropriate, way too dirty. Todd, were you listening?

28:21Ronnie Karam: Todd's just making out with some waitress Todd

28:29Ben Mandelker: Todd's just waiting in line in a public space looking at porn on his giant iPad Todd be more discreet

28:38Ronnie Karam: that shit was so funny Todd got caught looking at porn on his iPad and it wasn't even porn it was like a lady in a lingerie thing but Todd he's just that guy like hey wait I mean, is the Wi-Fi working in here? I was looking at old production stills of Chloris Leachman. Since when was that born?

29:00Ronnie Karam: So it's ankles. It's just a picture of ankles. Was it tan lines? It's a drawing of tan-lined ankles. It's a tin type.

29:13Ben Mandelker: Oh, for both of us.

29:16Ronnie Karam: well i don't know what the truth is about you guys and lisa but i always have lisa's back i'm quiet and trust me i'm scary right whitney and whitney's like yeah you do not want to piss quiet off because what she did to her husband steven

29:39Ben Mandelker: whitney girl don't say a thing i would hate there for there to be a giant scandal around me in my premiere season. Too bad I can't say anything, because it's the perfect antidote to Kwai. Oh, good. I was worried I was coming down with a bad case of Kwai. I'm glad she has an antidote for it.

30:03Ronnie Karam: Whitney introduces her antidote words in this episode. Rough. It's a rough go for Whitney in this one. She's like, what does that even mean? Wait, let's just say I know what Kwai will do if you do her dirty, and it's... Fine. Dirty. Can we do that again? So we go to Angie and Mary talking about Ashley, and Angie's like, I wasn't sure what to expect with Kwai, but she is darling.

30:43Ben Mandelker: and Mary's like yeah well you know just remember always Angie's saying like oh I'd heard maybe she's not the best but I thought she was lovely and Mary's like look always make your own opinion about someone which is why I'm asking you right now to tell me everything about this woman Kwai. Whitney told me a secret about Kwai she took her husband's tooth or her fiance's toothbrush and she rimmed it. First of all, when she said she rimmed it, I felt like...

31:13Ronnie Karam: We all thought that.

31:14Ben Mandelker: That was a different visual.

31:16Ronnie Karam: And she gets there eventually. Those Salt Lake City ladies act like theirs is so above it all. And then this whole episode's about rimming your husband.

31:25Ben Mandelker: I like also that Angie spells it out in case we can't tell how gross it is that what Kwai did. She's like, Kwai took her fiancé's toothbrush when she was mad at him and clean the toilet with it and put it back. So if you put a toothbrush in the toilet and you brush your teeth with it, you're basically putting poop in your mouth. See, the thing is this, the toothbrush has bristles and it picks up things in the toilet. And when you guys are like, yes, Angie, we understand.

31:54Ronnie Karam: I think she keeps talking because the producer behind the camera is looking at her like, what the fuck are you even talking about? He rimmed it, she took a toothbrush and she rimmed the toilet. And they're like, yeah, rimmed it with a toothbrush, rimmed it. And you got poop in it. And she just keeps trying to talk. And they're like, what the fuck are you even talking about?

32:18Ben Mandelker: And then she says, and you could get, what's that thing? E. coli.

32:26Ronnie Karam: Do you get that from poop? I don't think so. You probably do. You get a lot of things from poop.

32:32Ben Mandelker: Do we have any doctors or nurses who could inform us? thank you um but you also make poop think about that so angie's like i am going to proceed with greek caution because what if she's done something to my toothbrush i mean i say the wrong thing i mean have you heard stories about people in hotels non-greek hotels of course where they put toothbrush on your butt you see a toothbrush is a brush like a hairbrush but it's small so it fits It's in your butt. Mary's like, I don't know. Mary, who is like, if you have diabetes, drink water, is like, that doesn't happen.

33:11Ronnie Karam: Of all the people to worry about someone's husband rimming somebody.

33:22Ronnie Karam: It's just a fantasy. Let me have my inner thoughts. so then we go where do we go Whitney Ashley and Bronwyn bar called Sue still hate it Whitney's like what did you think of all of the ladies Cly and she's like well yesterday when everybody was arguing and I said guys can we stop ganging up on Lisa like can we start taking turns if you want to yell at Lisa just wait your turn to yell at Lisa you know and then Angie said I'm the new girl and I can't get aggravated wait Angie said that to you yeah She did. I heard it. I heard it. I heard every single word of it. I heard every single word of it, and I will write it down like a court reporter.

34:06Go ahead. Angie said that to you?

34:10Ronnie Karam: Angie did say it. She said, you're aggressive. You're an extremely aggressive person. You need to back down. I'm going to mace you in the face. I'm going to mace you in the face. That's exactly what she said. It was terrifying. It was terrifying. Angie said that to you? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And I was just - I'm doing the whole body nod. That's how serious I am. Oh, I really like this girl. I didn't think the nod could go beyond the neck, but she's doing the whole body. I'm impressed. She did. She said you're aggressive. And Kawhi's like, aggressive? Oh, wow. Well, also, Heather was nice to me, but then the way that she just stuck her finger in Lisa's face and said, you're a liar, Lisa Bart.

34:46Ronnie Karam: That was a little weird. I mean, I thought that was weird. She was nice to me, though.

34:50Ben Mandelker: She was like, Diablo. Am I right, girls? You have no idea what I'm saying. Diablo. That's okay. But Diablo. I'll just say it a few more times and I'm sure one of you guys will turn it into a different word and then use that as the crux of a storyline for the whole season. Okay, Diablo.

35:04Ronnie Karam: You just see Whitney trying to compute letters. She's like, huh? Isn't that what people live in in New Mexico? That's Pueblo, not Diablo. Oh. There's a deep rift. Very deep. It's very deep. It's a very deep rift. And I will go to my grave standing on these words. Mm-hmm. Wait, this is fun. Heather's my closest friend. Kwai and I have a special bond through my best friend, Shari, who passed away a few years ago, so she's legally not allowed to get mad at me. And I'm already nervous about Kwai being really good friends with Lessa. So I do not need my two good friends to be frenemies right now. Uh-oh.

35:50What will I do?

35:53Ronnie Karam: Well, we'll see. I mean, I'm excited about the trip. We're all going to San Francisco because I used to live there. I used to live there. I used to live in San Francisco, so we're going to go there. It's going to be wild. We're going to see a new Bronwyn. Bronwyn dating young guys. I used to date there. I used to work there. Big thing. You're going to see me smoke a cigarette later. Hold on. Iconic moment incoming. Yeah. I left my bob in San Francisco.

36:18Ben Mandelker: So we go back to Angie and Mary. And basically, Mary's not going to go on this trip.

36:21Ronnie Karam: Mary's like, I'm not going to San Francisco. Mary goes, I have no interest in going to San Francisco. Nope.

36:30Ben Mandelker: No. No. I will stay here. So Bronwyn starts to talk back at Sue. Bronwyn's like, you know, San Francisco always feels to me like a place where anything's possible, except, you know, flat sidewalks. And, you know, when I lived there, I just always felt like my days, my best days were still ahead of me. Days where your hair could just be brought shorter and shorter and shorter and shorter. but now I can only go this high

36:55Ronnie Karam: there's so many guys in San Francisco named Bob I mean it's crazy it is literally crazy

37:02Ben Mandelker: so she's excited to bring everyone to the Bay Area and show them the land where she met Todd

37:11Ronnie Karam: I'm not planning to drop anybody in Alcatraz but if I

37:18Ronnie Karam: this part of the season cracks me up how they're all like oh my god so good to see you girl Isn't this fun? We're having such a good time. This is so great. 10 minutes by the end of the episode. Like, fuck you. I know. You alcoholic bitch. Reset.

37:33Ben Mandelker: So now we go to Kwai going on a date with her husband, Steven.

37:38Ronnie Karam: I was surprised that we saw Steven. I really thought he was hiding out in like the Limbaugh compound somewhere. Like, ditto. He's just somewhere going, ditto.

37:48Ben Mandelker: Ditto. So Ashley's like, she's like, well, well, I'm going to let everyone figure out their shit. You know, this is going to be a crazy trip. And he's like, I'll keep my fingers crossed for it. Because I guess this is the crossing back and forth while everyone's getting ready. So she's excited to go on the trip. And then we cut to Heather's house. And she and her daughter are like packing. And then Heather turns to her daughter and goes, did Lisa Barlow really get invited to the Oscars?

38:16Possible.

38:17Ronnie Karam: We go over to Angie. And Angie, you know, it's one of those packing. like we're going on a trip. Everyone must pack. And I love it because they always show like the dog. You know, we see her pink dog and Celia. I feel bad for Celia because Celia is not really jumping into her suitcase as much as she's flipping over the top and just like zipping it, zipping the suit. Just kidding. Poor Angie. So while Angie is packing, there is a huge box on her bed. And it's in Sean's place. It's where Sean sleeps. They have a bed as big as a city block. It's huge. And it was always weird because he would be like over there on that side of the stage and she'd be over there and she's like, what is the distance between us?

39:01Ronnie Karam: He's like, oh God, that's 30 feet. At least, thank God. Don't make it shorter. They've always had kind of a distant relationship, but in his place is literally a grinder box. For those of you who don't know, that's the app for gays.

39:18Ben Mandelker: To get down and dirty. So there, yeah, there is literally just a box that has the Grindr logo on it. It's just resting on his pillow.

39:26Ronnie Karam: He is, you guys know why, right? She was named Grindr's housewife of the year. I didn't know that Grindr had, like, how do you even vote? How do you vote for that on the Grindr?

39:41Ben Mandelker: Did Lisa confuse the Oscars with the grinders.

39:48Ronnie Karam: Angie's like, I keep getting DMs that say, sup? You up? It's bizarre, but they don't say Angie is the housewife of the year on Grindr. They just show a giant Grindr box in Sean's place on the bed. Golds.

40:06Ben Mandelker: That's why I like Cilia, because Cilia's just sitting there being like, girl, when are we going to talk about this?

40:13Ronnie Karam: silly like i'm a pink dog and i'm like that shit's gay

40:18Ben Mandelker: but things are not well between the two of them as we actually know in real life but she says that there are now kind of like strangers and she's hoping to she's excited for this trips that way

40:28Ronnie Karam: she can distract herself from her marriage i've been sad about your marriage for five years like you guys have been separating for five years i mean i guess it's still sad i feel for the dog I feel for Grindr. You know who I really feel for? Phil, the show. Huh. I feel for Bronwyn. Because to be, like, I'm one of the gays and dress so fashionably. And, like, I'm the only person who actually pays Christian Siriano to do fashion for me. And then she has a vacation in San Francisco. And the gays are still like, well, no, we choose Angie. We still choose.

41:06Ben Mandelker: So we go to Meredith's house And she's got her wig on

41:15Ben Mandelker: But let me tell you something She's not the only one Because we also have Seth Who has like a little Like forehead wig now Seth doesn't even have a wig

41:24Ronnie Karam: He has like a comb forward But it's back here And it's three triangles coming up And he's like Hey What you feeling, Mer?

41:33Ben Mandelker: Hey, how's it going? Want to talk about the youth of America now that I got young persons here? Oh, God. Well, it's just me, DJ Meredith Marks, trying to plug a microphone into a pioneer team. Seth, will you help me? I'm trying to play a remix of Black Velvet.

42:01The same song, Meredith. you're just playing Black Velvet. Oh yeah? I'm mixing up something right now.

42:11Ben Mandelker: Oh, I was just gonna say hey, why didn't you ask a young person like me to fix your board? You just gotta plug it in, Mayor. Well, I charged it with the charger and it was working and it was not working. I'm not really here with the microphone. It was down. Oh, that's pretty confusing. How's anyone going to hear you play Betty Davis Eyes?

42:41Betty Davis Eyes.

42:46Ben Mandelker: So he's like, she's like, you know, this board, it worked last night, and now it doesn't work, and it's changed, and whatever. So he's like, I wouldn't lose any sleep over it. That's an old person's problem, you dig?

43:04Well, I've got a new announcement to make. I am a DJ.

43:11Ronnie Karam: And she is really selling this DJ thing. Do you think she remixes anything ever? I don't think she does it.

43:17Ben Mandelker: No, it's like, you know, at the end of the CD, there's like a remix, it's a seven-inch remix of Dinosaur Jr. And so she just finds that and presses play and crossfades, and that's all I would need from her. I'd be very happy as an attendee.

43:33Ronnie Karam: Yeah. I think it's one of those things like driving where you're like, well, if Erika Jayne can do it.

43:44I don't know why you're... I don't know why you're asking me about this crazy stuff, Meredith.

43:51Ben Mandelker: Well, I didn't get a cappuccino in bed. I'm sorry, my wig is not... It's a little bit too far back. Hold on one second. Well, that's much better. I didn't get a cappuccino in bed for the last week, and it's a very small gesture. I don't ask a lot, but all I want is a cappuccino and then a little baby cappuccino for our toddler. Meredith, you gotta stop babying the kids. They're old enough to run a business. They're old enough to inspire the country. Uh-uh. The other day I took Brooksy to Kachina Toscana And he said Why aren't there any planes coming into the hangars He's too young to go into the real world It's like I told Instagram, Mayor You're not mothering them You're smothering them All right Seth Marks At Seth Marks Somewhere Georgia McCann is like So good

45:00I mean the kids are even older than you man well they may look like it

45:11Ronnie Karam: so anyway and you know Brooks was watching that like oh fuck

45:19Ben Mandelker: don't they in the middle am I wrong did we glide over isn't there like a moment in the middle of this scene where they're like, how do we fix this? They ask, Brooks comes up. They're like, Brooks, am I smothering you or am I just doing my duty as a gay icon? He's like, I would like to go back downstairs, please.

45:41Ronnie Karam: Thanks for having me. Gotta go. So now we go to airport time. We're going to San Francisco. So everybody is arriving at the airport and it is St. Patrick's Day. Huh? Top of the morning, Tanya. Top of the morning. Oh, wow. What a great episode of a television show. I'm so glad that they are doing funny jokes on a holiday. That's kind of my thing. Okay, no, it's fine. Am I being edged out of the network? That's fine. I just sort of feel like a woman who found her husband walking on the beach with a slot. Yeah, yeah, that's great. Now there's eight people walking around with glitter green tops. Well, I'm happy for them.

46:27They must have come up with that themselves.

46:33Ronnie Karam: So Heather is kind of the Shannon of this cast where she's like, It's St. Patrick's Day? I had no idea. She's wearing like St. Patrick's Day glasses and a beard and a green hat.

46:46Ben Mandelker: She also finds a penny and she's like, It's a lucky penny. Oh, and did you guys hear she has a new book coming out called I Found a Penny. Mormon Penny Finder. Bad Penny.

47:04Ronnie Karam: Speaking of, Whitney shows up. Huh? She's like, wow, I'm 69 % Irish.

47:1723andMe told me I'm 69 % Irish and if you add that together 23and63 means I'm 125 % Irish or as my son calls that website Mom and Me

47:37Ben Mandelker: Meredith shows up not wearing any green and she goes, I'm 0 % Irish. She talks like she might be 100 % though.

47:47Ronnie Karam: Yeah, I was going to say, you've got the ability to hold your liquor like one, that's for sure. So, and by hold it, I mean hold it.

47:57Ben Mandelker: Like physically, she's very strong. We're making no commentary.

48:01Ronnie Karam: So Lisa arrives and she's like, oh my God, I have a green fire. Yeah, this is as Irish as I'm going to get. You know, I got this for the Martin Scorsese thing, the Irishman.

48:15Ben Mandelker: The arrivers? Yeah. Yeah. Thank you for the one person who watched The Departed and got that. It was really long.

48:25Ronnie Karam: I got tired. You don't get it. So Lisa's like, yeah, I'm not going to do this. And she's like, what do you do when someone doesn't have grain? You get to punch them, right? I want to be punched do you get like thrown into a toilet bowl is that what happens poor Lisa

48:47Ben Mandelker: do you remember she told this story like in season 2 or 3 where she was like yeah my family was crazy they like tied me to a pole and just like left me there and people would come by and make fun of me no wonder why she's so scandalized how did I forget that no wonder why she's like I don't want to get punched on St. Patrick's Day She has had like the worst trauma. Yeah, it's really tough being from New York. We have things called electric poles that your sister ties you to until people be... Yeah, if you don't wear green, they put you in a trash can and roll you down a hill. Everyone knows that.

49:24Ronnie Karam: And then comes the light of all of our lives. Britney.

49:30Guys, I'm so excited to be here.

49:34Ronnie Karam: She pulls out her phone. and she starts TikTok-ing herself. She's like, it is St. Patrick's Day. Who's wearing green? Elderly person in a wheelchair. She's like, it's her phone in their face. She's like, hello, elderly person. What a rough time to not be able to run, am I right? You're not wearing green. Can I pinch you?

50:03No.

50:06Ronnie Karam: she only goes to the weak. She doesn't walk up to one abled person and say, can I pinch you? It's all people in wheelchairs. What the fuck is wrong with this lady? What are they supposed to do? She may not be able to walk, but she can still punch her ass. Hit her.

50:24Ben Mandelker: I'd be like, can I report you to the TSA? I have never seen someone who like actively goes about pinching people on St. Patrick's Day like it's trick-or-treating. Like, ooh. can I pinch you? It's like, what? And she's filming like, this is going to make the most brilliant TikTok of all time. Watching people, our elders in wheelchairs, having to endure her little pinches while she's probably singing Miss Saigon.

50:53Ronnie Karam: Did you see that white lady singing songs for Miss Saigon and pinching old people in wheelchairs at the airport? God, this is good. All these TikTok brains.

51:02Ben Mandelker: I have to say, when I was on vacay last week, I was in a van and someone was being really, really annoying and I did secretly take a voice memo and I was like, I've crossed the dark side. I've become Brittany Bateman and now I fully support her and what she did.

51:21Ronnie Karam: Are you recording us? I did that with my mom one time. I gave her weed because I was in LA and so we had legal weed and I was like, smoke this. And she's like, I will not. That is not Christian. I was like, shut up, you're drunk, smoke the weed When I tell you, I mean, she was always a shit talker But the shit that came out of her mouth And I was like, bloop Started recording Like, your aunt, what a motherfucker I mean, it was like five minutes earlier She was like, this is very anti-Christian And the second minute, she's like, fuck that bitch God bless the voice recorder on the Yes

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53:52Ben Mandelker: Yeah, they have a massive library of audiobooks and ad-free podcasts. And it is really the perfect thing to turn on when you're taking a long drive, washing some dishes. Like, enrich yourself.

54:03Ronnie Karam: New members can start listening with a 30-day free trial at audible.com slash WWC. So now we go to the plane taking it. While Meredith is like, well, this is my first trip with anybody since New York, and I'm very upset. And quite frankly, I am not okay with a lot of things that Brittany does. But she's just an idiot. Like, she's really annoying, this woman. Like, disgust to Brittany, like, you're not wearing green.

54:36Ben Mandelker: Brittany, you better watch out with those pinchers, because you're getting on a play with Meredith Marks, and you're going to need to bring an umbrella on board, okay? Crazy I'm ready to see the sequel To Crazy Regations On the scene of

54:53Ronnie Karam: So they Their travel is much easier Than your Oh here we go on a plane We're in San Francisco

55:01Ben Mandelker: Unlike American Airlines They get on a plane and they arrive at their destination

55:10Ronnie Karam: I can't believe they haven't learned their lesson why aren't they filming everything that happens on that plane? I don't care if it's a PA with a phone. Yeah. Or we just say, record it on your fucking phone. What do I have to show you how to produce a housewife show?

55:24Ben Mandelker: Yeah, I mean, seriously. So they arrive in San Francisco, and they're there, and Whitney is like, wow, San Francisco. I was in San Raymond for six years, which borders Danville, and that's right by Blackhawk. And that makes me 300 % Irish. 369.

55:52Ronnie Karam: What was the show of Teresa Giudice? He's like, huh?

55:59What's 69 at?

56:04Ben Mandelker: It's a fresh breath. So Bronwyn is like, you know. 69. Is that where you're both laying down? Uh-huh. Well, when I think of the version of me as a little girl or as a young adult or as a little girl turning into a young adult or someone who is slightly older than a young adult person, or just married in San Francisco with a guy who farts and says that Palm Pilots are the future. I just think, wow, it's like little Russian nesting dolls of old Bronwyns. And I'm going to pause and let America be horrified by the idea of little Russian nesting dolls of me. Cut to a shot of Muzzy Bronwyn and Gwendolyn or whatever her name is.

56:44Ben Mandelker: Like the Bob Patrol. That's the Russian nesting doll.

56:49Ronnie Karam: All the Bobs. We see all the versions of Bronwyn. We actually see pre-Bob Bronwyn. pre-Bob you know what I mean she didn't have a Bob back then and she looked so happy do you guys think that Bob's lead to misery and divorce think about it

57:08Ben Mandelker: what about Bob but it's actually sad because she's like she's like yeah I like to think about how happy I was in that time when I thought the best thing I could do was marry Todd and then go off to Salt Lake City where they don't have fashion. Yeah.

57:26Ronnie Karam: Were you single when you met Todd Bronwyn? Well, I was single when I met Todd. I mean, that would make sense, right? Single people meet other people and they date other people. Well, I met Todd and then Gwen was seven when I met Todd and it was her and I for a long time, but then we met Todd. A lot of rolling down windows and cars.

57:48Yeah, I try to keep the bean consumption to a minimum. But yeah, Todd slipped right on in there and then slipped right on out.

57:57Ben Mandelker: And they're like, aw, poor Todd. And Heather's like, you know, I never thought it would be possible for me to feel sorry for Todd.

58:05Ronnie Karam: What? First of all, pause. What the fuck, Heather? Who feels sorry for Todd? Todd is a cheating fuck. Listen, I like Todd on the show just because I like doing this. But I don't care if Bronwyn put that man in the middle of the street, started him on fire, kicked him in the butt, and peed on him. I'm not going to feel bad for Todd.

58:36Ronnie Karam: Todd did what Meredith did with her music career. He earned this.

58:44Ben Mandelker: You're all gassed up about Todd. Well, I have to say also, quite frankly, another reason why not to feel bad for Todd is like if you look at the pictures of Todd and Bronwyn when they got together Bronwyn was the model and Todd was Todd so now Bronwyn's just doing it right back to him and I say all the power to her

59:05Ronnie Karam: so yeah sorry to interrupt you but Heather's like yeah I mean I feel so bad for Todd now I mean sure he's a cretin but I mean to meet some lady who just like you marry her? She's like some single mom and you marry her and she takes all of your money? I mean, poor Tom.

59:24Ben Mandelker: I'm like, that's the backbone of the Real Housewives. So

59:29Ronnie Karam: they're going to be staying at a hotel. What am I supposed to do to take all your money? Like, what better way to do how, is there a more polite way than marrying you and then you cheating on me?

59:40Ben Mandelker: Yeah, take that money. Do it like Blue Can Trail style, remember? Thank you, all you blue Cantrell heads out there. Hey, ladies. Hey, ladies. I'm going to remix that. Hey, ladies. Bell that when you're coming in the night. Hit them up, Seth. Hey, ladies. If your husband has a new wig and you want to have a wig too, put on wigs and you'll have wigs together and your toddler will be very sweet. Ah, you Shh

1:00:20Ronnie Karam: So Angie's like, are we staying in a hotel? No We are, we are We're not, we're going to stay in a cardboard box What do you think Angie? We're going to be staying in a hotel

1:00:34Ben Mandelker: So Heather's like, guys, everyone has to kiss An Irish stranger And so Brittany's like Oh, I will, I will So Meredith's like, oh god Not this one again. So they're going to go to a Bronwyn's like, we're going to go to a club. We're going to go to a private club that I'm a member of. Who else is a member of a private club? Anyone? No, Sam's Club does not count. No.

1:01:00Ronnie Karam: Heather goes, wow, Bronwyn. Were you just at the Oscar Awards? We're going to get Lisa right now. I was doing the commentary, the red carpet commentary for E. people would come out, dress very well and I would say, Todd is cheating on me. They loved it. They loved it. I'm going back every year. It was really nice. And Heather's like, oh, because Lisa was invited to the Oscars.

1:01:26Ben Mandelker: Yeah, I get invited like every year. Like you don't know, I was actually in the control room so like Braun was on camera but I was actually controlling that entire telecast. Yeah, they just really liked me at the Oscars. They loved me there. Yeah. I get invited like every year And Brittany's like, but then why didn't you go, Lisa? Why wouldn't you go to the Oscars? She's like, oh my God, I get invited to that stuff all the time. It's like Oscars, Emmys, gummies. I'm always telling, it's like all, gummies, all the time. I'm always telling Angelica Houston, like, stop, I'm not coming. It's hard.

1:02:01It's not as easy as it looks. Like, it looks so fun and glamorous, but it's like really hard.

1:02:06Ben Mandelker: It's like so hard you have to sit in a seat. So anyway Wait So Lisa you've been to the Oscars Yeah I've been invited But have you been to the sisterhood Of the Oscars Uh huh yeah I'm about it all the time What was it like Traveling pants Just word association now Wait I'm gonna call Bullshit on this You think Whitney I know, thank you. Whitney with the bombshell revelation. Stop. Wait a minute. Receipts, proof, Oscars. Look.

1:02:52Ronnie Karam: Ding, dong. But here's the other thing. A lot of times on this show, you know, I get so upset in these recas. I'm like, Heather is just lying. And as you'll see as we come up, Heather is just lying. She's always lying and no one calls her on it. Bronwyn, what a goddamn liar. I can't believe she said it. And then Lisa comes on and she's like, I just won an Oscar. I'm like, she's so great.

1:03:15Ben Mandelker: Well, because... Stop pulling Lisa. Well, because also, like, the delusion to decide you're just going to float that lie on national TV.

1:03:24Ronnie Karam: Yeah.

1:03:25Ben Mandelker: When, like, you spend your day going to Wendy's and, like, fixing Jack's hair and, like...

1:03:31Ronnie Karam: Yeah.

1:03:31Ben Mandelker: It's a fun line. Yeah. It's amazing, actually. It's, like, what I tune in for. I want this level of delusion. Never change. I promise if Lisa was invited to the Oscars, she would go. She would be running down the aisle going, Oscar, she would be there. She would be grabbing the microphones and trying to give out all the words. All I can claim to was that I was a seed filler for the People's Choice Awards one time, and I saw the back of Julia Roberts and I talked about that for years. Well, actually I went up to her and I said, hey, you're a real big dog around here. Want to hang out? And I was escorted out.

1:04:18You know what? But that's like, I'm invited to so many things. Like you guys say no to things sometimes. Heather's like, no, never. I've never said no. Sure you do. You guys do. Like when you're invited by movie stars places and you're like, I can. It's like so hard. No.

1:04:36Ben Mandelker: Yeah. But by the way, I just want to point out something. Bronwyn, you were invited to the Oscars, but I was invited even before the Housewives. So just based on my own reputation. I don't even need this Housewives thing. Yeah. I don't need it. They were like, we want to have every A-lister here and a random person from Utah. And that was me. I don't need Housewives to survive. Enjoy these Wendy's 10-piece nuggets. You know what's funny? when they invited me, they said, we want to hear so badly, we'll rename them the Lisa's. And I was like, don't.

1:05:09Ronnie Karam: It's ridiculous. But you know what? Let Lisa Barlow have her fun. If she needs to denigrate me being at the Oscars, then let Lisa do it. Let her do it. She's just going to have fun.

1:05:20Ben Mandelker: So their Sprinter van arrives at the hotel, and we have also the traditional thing where all the hotel staff lines up like they're about to do a musical number. And they're like, hello, hello. Welcome to San Francisco. like oh it was great

1:05:34Ronnie Karam: they don't do that just in case you guys are wondering maybe they're friendlier in San Francisco no they don't do that hey welcome print your own fucking key on the computer did you pre do this on the app you fucking idiot get in line you can check in at 4

1:05:52Ben Mandelker: so they all get into their rooms Bronwyn is FaceTiming with Muzzy and Muzzy is like oh I see you got the slut room that's appropriate Yep. And he's like, Muzzy's like, Hello, good mother here. I don't hate you at all. I'm so excited for you, Bronner. She's like, Mom, look, I'm here in San Francisco at St. Patrick's Day and I got a gold Judas Lieber of San Francisco at St. Patrick's Day first.

1:06:18Ronnie Karam: Her mom's like, You fucking sinner. Oh, that's the perfect little... Run in hell, you little bitch. Move you, Bronner. That's the perfect little clutch to put all your sins into. Okay. We might want to upgrade to a larger size. You're going to need a diaper bag for that one. So then we go to, I mean, I don't know. No, wait, no.

1:06:37Ben Mandelker: That way. We have a, guys, I know we're talking about the real house without the Salt Lake City, but it's time that we move over to CNBC to have some business talk. Because guess what? The executives of Meredith Marks franchises or enterprises are on the phone for a conference call. All right. toddler number one, Brooksy, what is the marketing report?

1:07:02Ronnie Karam: Well, like, there's a company and, like, you should do marketing for it. Chloe, what do you have to say about that? But there's, like, a company and you should do marketing for it.

1:07:16Ben Mandelker: Brooks, do you confer? Do you agree with that? Yeah, we got an email. I'm sorry to interrupt, but I have to say, Chloe, you look great right now. You look so fucking hot, Brooks. What if we like stop this call and just like get coffee?

1:07:34Ronnie Karam: Oh my god, I would love

1:07:36Ben Mandelker: to get coffee with a hot bro. Let's go to like gel and the juice. Wait, can we go do blue bottle? I don't know what that is, but I'll just whatever you say. I'm just there to mistake someone as hot as me.

1:07:52Ronnie Karam: Let's go to sleep. Oh, and you kids are doing a great job down there. This conversation was very funny, though, because Chloe's like, Mom, we got an email. But should we have a meeting about the email, or just should I, like, return the email? Meredith's like, I do not care about a meeting or an email. Oh, no. They were in charge of all 30 of my companies, and I'm very happy.

1:08:24Ben Mandelker: So now it's time to get messy. Now they've had a nice little episode of like, where's San Francisco? And now we're going to have people gathering together to talk shit. So we have Heather, Whitney, and Angie, and they all go to Bronwyn's room. And Whitney is like, hey, how are you feeling about the trip? And Bronwyn's like, I'm excited to relive my glory days before I met Todd and ruined everything. Yeah, yeah.

1:08:53Ronnie Karam: what do you guys think about Kwai, the new girl? And Heather's like, well, I think that she's like trying like to form within the group. Yeah, she's trying to figure everyone out. She keeps asking me about people. Oh, really? And what's her take on everyone in this sisterhood? Because we are a sister egg. Well, Bronwyn and I met her at a dive bar and we were just talking about the dynamics of the group and she's kind of giving us her read on everyone like figuring everyone out and then first of all she had interesting things to experiences with you two wait

1:09:34Ben Mandelker: wait wait wait wait wait wait wait I thought we were being Greek to her I even sat next to her oh wow oh wow Wow. Wow. Well, I levitated for her.

1:09:54Ronnie Karam: How dare you treat me like this? I levitated.

1:09:57Ben Mandelker: Two hours late. Two hours late to my levitation. Well, she was like, Heather was really nice to me, but then she got nervous when you went for Meredith. Do you remember when you were, like, pointing your finger at Meredith, and then you got intense? I mean, yeah, I do. I mean, I just don't get it. She doesn't know anything about what we're talking about. She quoted, unquoted.

1:10:28Do we have an antidote for Whitney? She said it. That's a lot. She said that's a lot when I sat next to her? She said that's diabolical.

1:10:48She said, diabolical? Diabolical. It was intense. Heather's intensity is what you're feeling. I told her, she can't be diabolical. We cut that off after you're born.

1:11:06Heather's like, what's diabolical? Let me look it up on my green St. Patrick's Day phone.

1:11:13Ben Mandelker: Oh, she always does this. She always does a definition moment. It's a characteristic of the devil, or something that's shockingly evil, cruel, and malicious. And finally, it's all to use to describe something extremely bad, unpleasant, or terrible. All right, she called it. She called it. Wait, what did you say about Angie? I want other people to get in on this.

1:11:40Ronnie Karam: Well, she said that you were like hazing her, and she didn't like that you said, don't talk, this is between us, and you weren't here, like, kind of pipe down. being a little russle, being a little russle, being terrifying, satanic panic.

1:11:52Ben Mandelker: I said that meaning that you weren't here last year. You didn't know what happened. And I was just trying to understand who you all were when I came into the group. But I wasn't trying to insert myself in these past issues like she's trying to do.

1:12:09Ronnie Karam: Oh, she said you were a monster. You can quote me on that. Quote me, quote me on that. And she's like, she wants to talk about me? Well, I know something about her. She rimmed a toothbrush with a toilet bowl. Who said that to their own husband? I can't believe you did that. Oh, my God. Wait a minute. I told that story to Angie a week ago in Privet. I can't believe when I told Angie you should say this in San Francisco that she didn't keep it quiet and not say it in San Francisco. Why would you tell people what I told you about? Why? She's like a sister to me. Wait a second. Sister hurt alert. She used her husband's toothbrush to rim something.

1:13:01Her husband's. And he took her back. He married her after she rimmed him. And she's calling me diabolical. Wait a second. Did she even find her husband on Angie's list?

1:13:18Ronnie Karam: wait did you say you're not supposed to know that wait how does everybody know that did you already know this did you already know this too Whitney she's like what

1:13:27Ben Mandelker: which by the way it's funny to watch this but also Whitney's being a shitty shitty friend

1:13:32Ronnie Karam: right now to the new girl always this is always what they do they take one thing that you said and then they twist it and make you look really evil I mean they've been doing this for years and it's it's kind of like my favorite song at this point like they make me crazy but I'm like oh my god, I was worried about this season. But Whitney and Heather are just going to lie again. God bless them. Play it again, Sam.

1:13:52Ben Mandelker: It's true. They go off to their first trip of the season and that's when all this shit always happens. I will never betray Kawhi. Guess what Kawhi did? I know. She said that you were aggressive when you pointed your finger at Meredith Marks. Oops.

1:14:10Ronnie Karam: Now everyone's getting ready. Blah, blah, blah. They're going to go out. Now they've boarded trolley. And Heather's like, I hope we get to eat rice-a-roni. I'm like...

1:14:24My face melts off. Well, I once played Raisa Gorbachev in a local production of Welcome to Moscow. I saw

1:14:34Ronnie Karam: a TikTok where someone said, if you don't like Guinness, you can put an espresso martini into the Guinness. That's what we're going to do together. they're all like, aren't we having fun? Just get to the fight, we're all yelling at each other.

1:14:46Ben Mandelker: I know. So then Angie is like, hello, friends of the Greek caboose, whatever we're in. Trolley car. I have a gift for everyone because I did not plan this before coming to San Francisco. Here is a individually wrapped toothbrush for all of you.

1:15:09Ronnie Karam: I just want you to know I have your back as friends because I heard that Ashley Kwai rimmed a toilet with a toothbrush and that could happen to us what if we get rimmed by Ashley Kwai Angie's ability to just bungle every single line

1:15:30Ben Mandelker: I got rimmed I know it's amazing I'm honestly dumbfounded of course Angie heard it from Whitney. And Angie's like, part of coming into the group is learning that hygiene and safety is top priority.

1:15:50Ronnie Karam: I can't. And Ashley is just sitting there because she's getting it for the first time where they're just all going to start getting mad at this girl for no reason. And Ashley's like, well, 100 % guilty, and I'd do it again. I found text, not that he was cheating, but his friend was telling him to cheat, and he laughed about it, so I put his fucking toilet, put his toothbrush in my asshole. I scraped it up, and I gave it to him.

1:16:21Ben Mandelker: And he married me anyway, so I hope you find a man like my husband one day.

1:16:29Ronnie Karam: have fun with your Angie's list, loser. I own a fucking mountain. Wait, wait.

1:16:38Ben Mandelker: Does he know about the Oscars that I got invited?

1:16:45Ronnie Karam: So Lisa's like, wait a minute. Why? What does your husband know? She's like, oh, he knows. He knows all about me, and if he ever fucks with me again, I'll do it with his head. He's like, oh, my God. Ashley's an icon. time.

1:16:58Ben Mandelker: Wait. Lisa literally asks, how clean was the toilet when you did it?

1:17:06Ben Mandelker: Oh, it was a clean toilet, so it's okay. She's like, well, I didn't pay attention. I just like looked in the mirror. I mean, it was four years ago, you know, but yeah, I did a little bit of that. Right. You know what I've

1:17:15Ronnie Karam: done to that man in four years? You're going to hold a fucking toothbrush against me? Good God.

1:17:20Ben Mandelker: This is exactly why I love Kwai, because I think they thought this was going to be like a big, embarrassing story to annihilate our character? And Quaz just like, yeah, fuck around and find out, which is what I also say to the people at the Oscars, right?

1:17:35Ronnie Karam: Well, I wouldn't do that to my worst enemy.

1:17:39Ben Mandelker: Okay. Great to know.

1:17:44Ronnie Karam: So Andrew's like, and also I heard that we pissed you off and that is why you got a rimmed brush. And Heather's like, yeah, what was so offensive that we did to you? Kwai, I sat next to you

1:17:58Ben Mandelker: so Kwai's like, well what happened everyone was like coming at Lisa and then Angie's like, but I am Greek she goes, let me finish girl I'm not belittling any issues you have with Lisa all I said was you guys one at a time, get in line everyone was coming at her and you looked at me and you go you're the new girl, you don't get to get aggressive, which technically she actually said none of that, but that's okay yeah

1:18:24Ronnie Karam: Well, nobody said anything that we're about to quote. That's the best thing about this show. Yeah, yeah. So then we see a flashback to Angie saying, but you don't know us, though. You weren't here, so you can't talk to Olympia Dukakis like you are one of us.

1:18:39Ben Mandelker: And then she said to me, why don't you run in the Iowa caucus? And I said, I'm not a politician.

1:18:45Ronnie Karam: And Kwai responded to her, I can be aggressive because I see someone getting teamed up on. So Kwai is the one who said she can be aggressive. Okay. So then we get back to Prez and Angie's like, are you done now? May I talk now? This woman stuck a toothbrush in the... I don't remember her even saying that anybody was aggressive. And Angie's like, I didn't. She goes, she never said that. And so now they have to rely on Bronwyn. And Bronwyn's like, no, what, what, what? No, I never said any of this. I don't think I've ever met Kwai before tonight. So this is nice to meet you. I thought you were just a fan in a green wig, but it's nice that you're actually on the cast.

1:19:24Ronnie Karam: Ashley's like, wait, quite. No, you did. You were right there, and you said that. Yes, I did say. It's like, mm-mm. What? What? Who? What? I have no idea what you're talking about. And you better back the fuck down. You have been here five minutes, and how dare you come for me?

1:19:40Ben Mandelker: So then Ashley's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Bronwyn, no, you said exactly like this. Oh, I heard that, and that was disrespectful. Yeah, but this is kind of a joke, guys, though. Like, everyone can say exactly what they want whenever they want to say it. So, for instance, if you want to say something like, I got invited to the Oscars, you're allowed to say that. Yeah. You can say things if you're young. You can say things if you're old. You can say some things if you're middle-aged. Like, what are you going to do? Like, we all have a right to speak. I'm against ageistism. So, stop. Say you.

1:20:15Say me. Say it together. Naturally. Ladies. That was a crossfade.

1:20:28Ronnie Karam: Angie's like, but she didn't know the situation. So I told her, you don't know the situation. Wait, wait, you know what? Can I just, what are you? Everybody's mad that she took my side, but like, so what if she took my side? Is that so wrong?

1:20:42Ben Mandelker: Is that so wrong that somebody cared about me, Lisa Barlow? Because she wasn't there, Greek, and doesn't know Greek. But why can't she take my side? You guys! You guys, I wasn't taking a fucking side. All I wanted was to solve problems. Get in line. Brush your teeth, please. I have something to say here. DJ Meredith Marks. Everyone in this group complains that they feel ganged up on. Tag teams, blah, blah, blah. Anyone can point it out. And I think that everyone should not feel that way. Hey, ladies, if you're feeling ganged up on. But then she left and she talked about me and she talked about Heather.

1:21:34She said that Heather was aggressive, murderous, malicious. Heather's an assaulter. I said it. I said it. I didn't talk about Heather. all I said about you called me diabolical. Just look at Whitney. She's still trying to figure out the word. Double I with an I-cal. Marry the two, cross over the D. Bellagio Hotel and Casino. Maybe I did say diabolical. Maybe she didn't say it. Maybe someone said it. I don't know. What did they say? What's happening? Where am I? I'm scared. Justin. So Ash is like, let's be honest. It's a Taco Bell sauce. It's not even that spicy.

1:22:30Ben Mandelker: Don't let Lisa know you're trying to carve into the fast food space because she will not be happy with that.

1:22:36Ronnie Karam: I was saying Diablo, devil, spicy sauce. That's all. How many languages do we have to learn to sit at this table?

1:22:48You know, I thought we were getting along and things were cool, and I am shocked by this.

1:22:53Ronnie Karam: I'm horrified in the sisterhood. Well, you did say that you were terrified of Heather Gay. You did. You said that you were scared. You were going to call the police. I remember that. I do remember that. You put it in the neighborhood app. I saw it. Well, it was a terrified one.

1:23:06Ben Mandelker: All I said on my fucking life, I said, all of a sudden, at dinner, I just saw Heather's finger go like this, and like, I go like, oh, and that's what I said. And I also said Diablo, which apparently messed up everyone's brains. Well, that's not what I heard.

1:23:22Ronnie Karam: She's like, shut up, everybody! Just shut the fuck up! Seriously! Oh my god, can I just speak? And Bronwyn's like, oh!

1:23:31Ronnie Karam: You've been here five minutes, and you already told me to shut the fuck up! You can sit down, girl.

1:23:37Ben Mandelker: At least have the decency to have a bob when you say those things to me. So the trolley parks, and they get out, and they're at a bar. They're ordering Guinness and everything. And I don't know if you guys have ever been to San Francisco for St. Patrick's Day, but it is low-key very wild up there. It is a crazy, crazy thing. And I love that they were in the middle of it. So now they're all getting wasted. And Lisa, Ashley, of course, is now really upset because she was not expecting to get thrown on the bus or the trolley by Whitney. so she's upset and Lisa's like yeah she's delusional she can like make up lies about anything on the fly it's like ridiculous like I can't stand people who just like make up lies out of nowhere hold on one second I just got the digital invitation to the Oscars no I'm not going I'm not and you will not let these women bully you because when they see you crying they will do it 90 times

1:24:33Ronnie Karam: as hard and she's like I'm just destroyed that somebody told Heather that I don't like her and somebody's a diabolical who even uses English like this I've never and Kwai's just like so then Whitney goes over

1:24:51Ben Mandelker: so Lisa and Meredith are consoling Kwai and this is especially you know I do feel like they were like oh this sucks for her but they're also like come to our side right they're like we have someone for the two of us is the two of them against the whole cast.

1:25:05Ronnie Karam: Yeah, they finally have someone on their side. It's going to be quiet because she's also been bullied.

1:25:12Ben Mandelker: Whitney tries to go up and she's like, hi. Hi. Hey. What's wrong? Ashley's like, no, Whitney, no. I don't want to talk to you. Stop.

1:25:22Ronnie Karam: Stop speaking to me right now. I just need a moment alone. Alone with my girls. I've been bullied. I've been traumatized. No, Kwai. No. You did this, Whitney. No, I didn't. I didn't.

1:25:34Ben Mandelker: And so Lisa's like, can you just give her like a few seconds? She's our friend now. Yeah. Can you go away now? She's ours. She's on our side. You lost her. I'm just trying to protect the bond I have with Kwai.

1:25:47Ronnie Karam: We're sisters. And Bronwyn's like, well, yeah, actually Whitney underplayed it. Whitney actually underplayed it to save Kwai's feelings. You should have really heard what Kwai said. Oh, that's murder. Bronwyn is so full of shit. Why does it make me crazy that Bronwyn is such a liar? But not Lisa. I'm such a fucking hypocrite. I get it. But it just makes me nuts. It makes me crazy.

1:26:09Ben Mandelker: It's just simple. Lisa's lies are funny.

1:26:11Ronnie Karam: They're just funny lies. I think it bothers me because when I read comments or, you know, because I'm obsessed with this shit, obviously. Like some middle-aged man sitting up here talking for 18 hours about Housewives. So, you know, I read comments about... I get into it. And I feel like Lisa does take shit When she lies to everyone It's like oh Lisa's a fucking liar But then when Bronwyn does it Everyone's like oh my god Iconic Iconic I love her fashion

1:26:40Ben Mandelker: So Whitney after having been shooed away by Kwai And the other woman goes back to Bronwyn Who's like got a cigarette from a stranger The good days Yeah believe it or not I am fucking a model Yeah no it's true It's me San Francisco Bronwyn Yeah San Francisco If you're going to San Francisco Wear some flowers in your bob So she's So Brahman's like Fuck this bitch I can't deal with this I can't deal with this Come on Can we have some fucking fun And move on Because now Brahman's like Wasted and you know High off of cigarettes So now they're annoyed

1:27:20Ronnie Karam: Because Ashley's still like Oh I've been so hurt And Ashley's like I'm not being a victim I'm not trying to be Woe is me I'm saying, ouch, I've been bullied. And Lisa's like, well, you know what? You didn't do anything wrong. So Heather's like, what is this, St. Patrick's Day? What are all these people fighting over a potato? Like the potato famine? Bunch of poor, drunk Irish people. Give me other Irish things to say. Is she green with envy? Oh my God. Is this like the time that Enya opened up her fridge and there was no food there, just a potato? And Enya was like, oh, I mean, really?

1:27:58Ben Mandelker: Enya. But also, Whitney, I have to say this. I love this. Sail away, sail away, sail away. Sail away. I have to say. Sail away the eyes. Book of bees. But Whitney. I would love to hear a Meredith Marks version of Enya. It would just be like this.

1:28:26Ronnie Karam: I think if it was karaoke, Meredith would just do that. It's like a...

1:28:42Caviar, caviar, caviar.

1:28:46Ben Mandelker: So, Whitney, I have to say this. Is it a family of 15 fighting over one potato?

1:28:53Ronnie Karam: Heather's still going on.

1:28:54Ben Mandelker: I know. See, the thing is that there was a famine. Whitney, meanwhile, she's being super messy, throwing her good friend under the bus that she has now insulated herself like, oh, you can't be mad at me because we share a friend who died. And so Whitney now, she tells us this bullshit right here. She goes, I'm just trying to protect the bond that I have with Kwai while standing up for my other friends while also trying to walk the fine line of my apology tour with Lisa and Meredith. Oh, yes. You are a true St. Whitney. I apologize for anything negative I've said about you on this journey.

1:29:31Ronnie Karam: You had to miss the episode last week where Whitney went up to Meredith and was like, Meredith, I'm so sorry. Lisa, I'm so sorry. Meredith was like, I will not accept. But I'm an alcoholic. Well, take a 13th step, which is get the fuck out of my face. And that brings us to the end of Real Housewives of Salt Lake City. Thank you all for helping us kick off our tour. And we will be back. Thank you, Kansas City. Good night. Thank you for being here. We love you. Bye.

1:30:08Ben Mandelker: Watch what crappens would like to thank its premium sponsors. Ain't no thing like Alison King. Our way is the Amber way. It's the Foster and the Furious. It's Amanda Foster. It's Always Automatic with Ashley Otto. Put your hands together for Carly Clapp.

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1:31:04Ronnie Karam: Megan Berg, you can't have a burger without the berg. I love-a-ya, Olivia Williamson. She's the lady of the house, it's Rachel Sherrouse.

1:31:13Ben Mandelker: She sure is swell.

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1:31:24Ronnie Karam: And our super premium sponsors. She's VVIP. It's Amanda V. Somebody get us 10 cc's of Betsy MD. We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Let's get real with Caitlin O 'Neill. Put us on a stretcher. It's Charlotte Fletcher. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily Sides

1:31:44Ben Mandelker: Who, what, why, where, and Gwen Pentland Nobody holds a candle to Jamie Kendall We got our wish, it's Jen Plish My favorite Murdo, Karen McMurdo Let's get savage with Laura Wildman In the study with a candlestick, it's Leslie Peacock We're ride or die for Lisa Rider Baron She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthy Always killing it, it's Lola Alkalani Roger that, it's Marlis Rogers

1:32:09Ronnie Karam: The incredible, edible Matthews sisters. She eases our woes, it's Melissa St. Rose. She's our princess, it's Rebecca Prince. She's the Queen Bee, it's Sarah Lemke. We cannot tell a lie, it's Sarah Talafson. Yes, we canna, it's Savannah.

1:32:26Ben Mandelker: Shannon, out of a cannon, Anthony. Please don't stop, it's Soli and Pop. Let's take off with Tam LaPlane. Strike a pose, it's Tori Rose.

1:32:35Ronnie Karam: She ain't no shrinking Violet Kuchar. We love you guys.

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