864. - Tim Miller

8:22Jason Stewart:Any Australian, do you have maybe a Primal Scream tee? You got one of those probably, right? That could be something.

8:27Tim Miller:I got a few of those actually. I mean, I would, I wish I had a silver chair frog stomp. I think, I think that would be, maybe I could talk to it. I don't have enough time to get one of my vintage guys to find me the frog stomp XL. That's where you're wrong, mate.

8:39Jason Stewart:I'll have one it'll be waiting for you at Barclays

8:41Tim Miller:I just saw the Chromio announced a DJ tour of Australia and the flyer is the sexy Chromio legs dripping and coming out of a Vegemite can but it says Chrom-o-mite Chromio-mite which I thought was very clever I thought that was very good

9:01Jason Stewart:do you think this was generated with artificial intelligence no it's definitely like graphic arts of some kind i'm looking at it right now i'm looking oh yeah it's good so the legs oh wow look at this look at this australia's on the mind i gotta say i gotta say oh and it says the funk extract proudly made in canada since 2004 okay those canadians had to sneak that in couldn't help themselves i think the problem is you know in in 2025 the average person in the world they're going to look at that and say is that doo-doo baby you know what i mean i mean it's

9:42Tim Miller:pretty clear if you have a brain and you see that it's australia and that logo but you're right i

9:49Jason Stewart:think most people don't know that yeah you said if you have a brain no no yeah well and that's what

9:53Tim Miller:well it's 40 australians definitely don't that's not what they're known for so it's gonna be

9:59Jason Stewart:don't do that don't do that yeah i'm gonna i'm hopping on a plane as basically we're gonna finish this and then like in a half an hour i head over to lax and then i begin my fun editing process on the plane i'll be i'll be busting out loose in brooklyn at the one hotel where we activated with our friends at new balance carolyn said there seems to be a lot of basketball players there and i said i'm on my way sweetie don't go in the why did you even notice that i don't understand why how do you know they're basketball players i have what is the is the sauna unisex

10:37Tim Miller:is the sauna unisex so you're saying these guys are basketball players i'm tall i'm not a basketball player how do you know how do you know did you ask them do you did you look them up i don't want

10:44Jason Stewart:the answer to that question because she'll say i know what your body looked like and their body

10:48Tim Miller:looked different no come on you're in your lebron era aging but still getting after it no i look i'm

10:55Jason Stewart:i'm not upset with how i look but i'm not you know i ain't lebron lebron and i are like the same height and he has let's call it 47 pounds of muscle on there's there's some additional muscle available there's some additional muscle available yeah from his back from behind looks less mr

11:12Tim Miller:burnsey i saw a guy i saw a guy on instagram that does like the little face and face you know face in the corner thing and he was talking about it was somebody making this crazy french toast and he was and it was these big slices of french toast and he kept saying he had he ain't ever seen big back french toast before and i have to say that made me chuckle if i back never gets old that's that's the the well back is it i want to use it more i just forget kind of because it is i feel like you could say it to a lot of people and they wouldn't know what you meant which is a very powerful thing to have in your in your arsenal yeah i mean it is it is i'm gonna group

11:55Jason Stewart:that into a section of words and phrases that i don't like which is i'm too afraid to say fat or i don't want i'm too afraid of offending someone so i'm just going to say big backed and then you know like there's so many people that say the word the words and you know they're trying to say the n-word or they're trying to say a slur they're trying to say something transgressive but they

12:14Tim Miller:just i i say i say that big back is funnier than that i know what you mean but i feel like it

12:20Jason Stewart:achieves no it is funny yeah something that's why i give it a pass i guess i get beyond something

12:25Tim Miller:beyond it takes it to a whole nother place brother whole nother place heifers got sting big back it's like yeah you got me i've eaten big back um quick quick uh update on the tesla from last episode

12:41Jason Stewart:Did you find the body? There was no body inside, but it really was a neighbor's tweaker son. Wow.

12:52Tim Miller:So you had a little bit of evidence that led you to this place.

12:56Jason Stewart:I saw a tweaker son pull up in what appeared to be his parents' car, like whatever, a 15-year-old Lexus SUV. and when it pulled up i could smell the engine and lack of care that it was being like you know when somebody pulls up and like oh you don't know how to drive too good i thought i thought

13:17Tim Miller:i thought the whole point was you just sort of reset the hard drive and that thing was good to

13:21Jason Stewart:go you're saying they got oil the tesla oh okay i'm saying the tesla was parked in front of my house i see i see i'm sorry smashed up with the windows rolled down he was borrowing a different car i see okay okay okay okay i did not get a chance to spray the inside of the car with with hose water and all is forgiven all is well my shout goes out to their tweaker son i hopefully

13:45Tim Miller:he lands on his feet is the car still there no it's gone okay it's okay it's gone it's gone okay windows are rolled up and it's gone i don't want to toot my own horn here but i said don't call the cops give this a couple days and the situation will will arrange itself let's not get the authorities involved and i think that was the right course here i'm glad i did the thing i don't

14:07Jason Stewart:normally do which is ask for help all right we have a we have a guest here today his name is tim miller he's from the bulwark network podcast newsletter etc etc he's wearing a hot boys t-shirt and he has a poster about beans behind him. I was going to talk to him about beans in China. So let's give him a call.

14:30Tim Miller:This episode of How I'm Gone is brought to you by Superpower. Every time I go to the regular doctor, I leave dumber than I came in. They tell me I'm fine. I get no data points. I get no spreadsheets. I don't even get a fucking game plan. I just get to see you next time, a pat on the ass, and I'm out the door. And I'm sick of that shit. And I feel like for whatever reason that you, them genes, might have a solution for me.

14:54Jason Stewart:Yeah, if you're sick and tired of your doctor saying, see you next time, then I would strongly advise you to check out Superpower. It's basically the way to insert all of this unknown information that your human doctor is hiding from you straight into your hand. I'm sure they have a beautiful app and a destination that shows you, here's all of your 100 plus biomarkers, but instead of your doctor saying like, hmm, that looks low. Anyway, do you see the Dodger game? You know, you're going to say, here's this biomarker and click this button. Here's what it means. Here's what you should do about it.

15:32Jason Stewart:This is happening here. So stop eating broccoli and start, you know, whitewater rafting. Whatever it is, superpower will give you the exact data and information to know how you can improve your life and become super. So take control of your health with superpower for a limited time. How Long Gone listeners get$20 off to unlock their new health intelligence. Head to superpower.com and use the code HOWLONG for$20 off your$1.99 Superpower membership. After you sign up, they will ask you how you heard about Superpower. Be a dear and tell them How Long Gone sent you, and that will help support the show.

16:10Tim Miller:This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by our old dogs over at Squarespace. Jason, I spend every waking minute of my day surfing the World Wide Web. I'm looking at social media. But you know me, I'm old school. I'm still checking out websites, baby. I type in that URL. I click. I surf. I find information. I delete information. It never ends with the internet. And most of the best websites that I come across were built on Squarespace.

16:38Jason Stewart:Use Squarespace and their beautiful websites to do some crazy stuff. you have a vision and you want to build a website for your new crazy business or whatever but you could also you know let's say your dog is having a gender reveal party and you just want to have a nice destination where there's a rich faq section and a place where people can donate and view the registry or maybe even your wedding you know we all need a wedding website it's just a thing that has to happen it's a thing that goes down and why not make it look better than all of your friends invitations and websites this year only on squarespace shit on the homies using squarespace

17:15Tim Miller:so go to squarespace.com slash how long for a free trial and when you're ready to launch use offer code how long to save 10 off your first purchase of a website or domain this episode of how long gone is brought to us by our friends at dart collective um i think we can all agree that wedding music is typically quite lame um cheesy and it doesn't represent the bride and groom's personal music taste. Luckily, Dart works with actual musicians and artists, many of whom have their own productive careers or tour in bands you've heard of. Everyone from Leon Bridges to Taylor Swift. Dart DJs use vinyl and are cool in a way that your peers would be not a dated Carnival Cruise performer.

17:56Tim Miller:They even have an in-house stylist to make sure all personnel look perfect on the day. Dart travels all over the world for events from Morocco to Italy, Greece, and the Maldives. Dart has done huge celebrity events and also intimate ones.

18:08Jason Stewart:Yeah, Chris, I am personally friends with Michael from Dart, and I have worked with them for years. I think the last time I did a big one, we did the Sweet Green wedding. They set up a beautiful booth for the ceremony, just some cocktail music, some vinyl, some cool vibes. And then they set up a whole big tent with a crazy bumping sound system for me to play in later. These guys are great. A lot of people always ask me like, hey, you know, do cool wedding DJs exist? Do cool event people exist? The cool part about Dart is they'll work with people like me to come and DJ your party, as well as provide all the gear and all the consulting and all that stuff.

18:50Jason Stewart:So if you don't know who to hire for your event, Dart Collective is the one. Dart, just like throwing a dart, dash collective.com. And as for Mike, his email address is michael at dart-collective.com. Tell them we sent you. So if you have an event coming up this summer, Dart Collective is where you go. All right, Tim, what's really good, baby? What's really good? What's going on, y 'all? thank you for having me i'm so pumped to do this um and i don't i didn't really want to talk about beans in china you guys are going to be my respite from all that but we can do whatever you want uh

19:29Tim Miller:okay okay well no i mean we're the yeah we're the fun after you know we're the fun stuff if you have to go on pod save america then we're a godsend so i i think that we can we can do anything you want listen to fifer and favreau you know lecture me all right and we'll get talking me talking point strategies i don't need that shit i want to give you yeah i want to give you the platform to sort of you know kind of get into topics you're not normally allowed to talk about you know we're

19:56Jason Stewart:a platform for that we're a safe space but unfortunately i think your um your straight offering across the table being basketball is one it's it's not one we're not the once is what we're saying you know okay well i am a homosexual so we can do gay stuff too um but am i also straight My other straight offering is guitar music and hip-hop, so we could do that. Okay. And basketball. Guitar music. College football. What about football? No, say it looks like straight. No football.

20:25Tim Miller:Save the hip-hop for Charlemagne and save the college football for anybody else, but we got some common ground here. Okay. Guitar music. That's good. Actually, Tim, I was in Florida for the last month, and I did find myself putting on college football in the background on a Saturday just because I like the action that's happening. I don't care about who wins or loses The pageantry though, the colors, the chanting You know, none of that Everyone's trying so hard What is your team? LSU, LSU Oh yeah, because you live in Baton Rouge Yeah, I live in New Orleans No, I don't live in Baton Rouge, are you kidding me?

21:00As mentioned, I'm gay and I've got a black daughter Okay, I'm not living in Baton Rouge We love my friends in Baton Rouge But we visit them for the football games And for the girls basketball games No, I don't live up there

21:11Tim Miller:They have girls basketball in Baton Rouge. That's big. Hell yeah. No, hell yeah. They're good. The team's good. Angel Reese.

21:17Jason Stewart:Okay, so for our listener, we have an international audience just like you do. LSU, Louisiana State University, and you mentioned Baton Rouge, a city there where the idea of going there with a black daughter and being gay is a no-no zone. Could you explain exactly why? Well, you know, it's just still pretty red in Baton Rouge. I don't, I don't, I mean, it's a college town. So there are good people that I got a couple of my buddies from college who live there. So I don't want to smear everybody from Baton Rouge. Of course. I'm just saying that, you know, um, like having a daughter who she's, she's playing sports.

21:51She's trying to get into soccer and basketball herself. And so I'm sure we can find a good school for her there where everybody would be very welcoming. But then you, then you start to get out and out, you know, a little outside of Baton Rouge, you know, you start to compete against the other teams. and I think that she might be exposed to some comments that I'd rather keep her in the bubble here in New Orleans.

22:12Tim Miller:I can't wait until your ass has to go to Baton Rouge for a fucking women's middle school basketball game.

22:18Jason Stewart:Have you considered blackface wearing the stands? So, no blackface I don't think anymore except for the Zulu parade at Mardi Gras down here. Blackface is encouraged and allowed. I think it's the only time where blackface is still allowed. I'm out. Not for me. I'm out. They love a loophole down there in Nala. Yeah, they do. It's not for me. Okay, but Zulu is the traditionally black Mardi Gras crew. Yep. And if you want to ride on Zulu as a white person, you do have to do blackface. And so I was invited one year and I respectfully declined. I was like, I appreciate your traditions, but that felt like a stretch to me personally as a podcaster, but that's the only blackface.

23:01It feels like a stretch to me just as a white person,

23:04Tim Miller:but podcaster sort of insinuates white person. Yeah, as any white person, for sure.

23:08Jason Stewart:I just meant, like, as an anonymous white person, you know, I don't know, maybe defensible, probably not for me. I'd like to see the cross-section of white person in 2025 who's going to be like, I am so secure with my lack of racism that I am no problem doing blackface when I'm asked to, you know what I mean? At Zulu.

23:26Tim Miller:I'm familiar with, a friend of mine did a great photo series with them. And it's really crazy looking. Like the whole thing is a real, like there's a lot of time and effort put into it. It's very impressive. I avoid New Orleans like the plague. I don't understand it. Why? I mean, I don't drink. I don't really like to eat. So I don't know what there is to do there, really. Well, music. He's sober and he doesn't like food with flavor. Are you fully sober? Yeah, no, I'm not. I'm not. Columbia sober.

24:00Jason Stewart:do you mean the country or the school or i guess both apply fully sober okay well music we could take you to frenchman street there's stuff to do well what do

24:10Tim Miller:you do for fun then not much that's kind of the whole thing i i limit fun as much as i can in my

24:16Jason Stewart:life so yeah new orleans probably not for you it's twitter twitter twitter which i could do anywhere

24:20Tim Miller:so in theory i could have a great i mean i've been only been to new orleans once and it was uh I actually have been twice, and they're both dark. I think I could revisit today as an adult. My friend just opened a bar there. What's the bar? It's called The Bell. Oh, yeah. Check that out. I was just there last weekend. It was great. Yeah. He's a guy from – this guy Brooks from Charleston. He's got a lot of great stuff in Charleston. But I want to go there to try that, but I don't know if I need to make a trip of it.

24:48Jason Stewart:I mean, I'm the opposite of sober. I'd be doing just about everything. and you really have to be a career drinker down there in nolens like i i'm like a little bit on the uh downturn with my with my drinking nowadays and you have like it's such a drinker's town i love getting a mint julep down there in nolens so nice people are partying down here that's sure there's like a a reddit post about the podcast that made me laugh from one of the listeners who was like if you're a elder millennial middle-aged parent like me like do you drink as much as Tim talks about drinking? Or is that just a New Orleans thing?

25:26And I was like, it's just a New Orleans thing. Because the parents, man, the father-daughter dance at my kid's school is rowdy. I mean, the dads are getting wrecked at the father-daughter dance. And I don't think it's like that everywhere. But the tough part for me is I've got to wake up and pod every morning. So I can't. Weekdays, I've got to behave. And you've got people rolling through. And when they're coming through, it's like it's their weekend away. They're on a work trip. They're away from the kids. They want to get loose. And I just like, I can't participate. It's like living in Las Vegas.

25:58Jason Stewart:They're coming into town and they got something planned that you might not have.

26:03Tim Miller:I like the idea, though, of a school dance ending with the underage daughters being the drivers, having to get the dads kind of in the car. That's a cool kind of concept. That's definitely the scene. But you're from, are you from Louisiana? No, I'm from Denver. I'm from Denver. No, I moved here. So I grew up in Denver. So nuggets and Red Rocks we could do as my straight stuff. But I grew up in Denver with school in D.C. And it's kind of weird. My best friend from college is from Baton Rouge. His wife's from New Orleans. And we just like bonded and kind of did the rich kid thing where like we all go to concerts together.

26:44And we travel to go see shows together. They come to Denver to ski or whatever. and so like we kind of merged high school groups and so like we kind of have like a Louisiana Colorado like high school college group merger and so then after the pandemic um when I had to like start flying to DC and New York more um I in between I was just like Denver's too far we lived in Oakland for a while on the west coast I was like that's too far I can't do these red eyes it's killing me and so we're like let's try let's move to New Orleans we got a bunch of buddies I got a bunch of buddies from college with kids my kids age here and it's been awesome.

27:18We were like, maybe we'll do it for a year and it won't take and it'll be too rowdy but it's opposite, man. Everybody's been so welcoming. It's been awesome and it's easy for me to pop up from here to D.C. and get back and so it's been great. I just can't live in D.C. Living in D.C. and doing politics is just like not an option. It's just suffocating. It's your whole life. You just can't.

27:38Tim Miller:Yeah, we were talking about that. We've done shows in D.C. the last couple of years and we do really well there I always like to talk about how the people with power, it's not based on looks at all. You know what I mean? In New York and L.A.

27:57Jason Stewart:Which is a concept we're not able to understand, really.

28:00Tim Miller:In New York and L.A., it's kind of like, if you're an eight or above, we'll figure it out. You know what I mean? No matter what your position in life is.

28:09Jason Stewart:Uggos can only get so far in our strongholds.

28:11Tim Miller:In Washington, D.C., the guy at the best table at the hottest restaurant had to get wheeled in there. You know what I mean? It's just, it's a different animal. It's a different animal. Oh, it goes crushing DC. And DC's got good stuff. You can see good shows, good food. I always said to people, I was like, if you're a dentist, like awesome, move to DC. It's great. You'll crush it. I like it. It's a good place to live. I like it there and it's pretty and the punk, the history is very rich and the 930, all that stuff, minor, it's very cool. But there is something about it where I feel like at least with with How Long Gone listeners is that also everyone there does coke that's I do like that it is like if everybody works on the hill and everybody does coke yeah no shortage of that not a good thing about DC is like it's like extremely well educated I'm sounding like Trump now it's like the high we love the highly educated but like you can just meet a stranger sitting at the bar and like they do something kind of interesting it's like oh you do african policy research or oh you know what i mean like yeah and and maybe a little less so now in the trump trump 2.0 but for a minute there you know strangers are interesting to talk to in dc versus other places i'm the guy who takes money away from the parks yeah yeah now that's what i'm actually i'm actually the head of construction for the united states actually that's my job so i

29:31Jason Stewart:just kind of oversee it all i do all the diaper burning for other countries to make sure well actually speaking of trump you know i was i was we've been watching him you know build this grand ballroom and i'm starting to wonder is is trump so straight that he's actually gay you know what i mean like people are saying like oh the ballroom it's a little bit of a gay thing for somebody like him to be doing but i'm i'm saying maybe he's so straight that he's trump is such a theater queen dude trump is would it would be do so much better at like theater trivia like like musical trivia than me he would crush me like he would he would destroy you at drag bingo whatever the topic was he would absolutely destroy me and um he's like so no he definitely has some gay tendencies and i think that um i i know in a different world you know um like a populist lefty like pro-gay trump like could have happened it would have been a better world for us you know i think

30:27Tim Miller:oh yeah yeah i think a few i think that's one or two decisions go differently and that's where would be yeah the racism was really what prevented like the central part five situation like really you know you'd have to win but like you know some of the rat like you have more of like a populist left trump is doing like pardoning diddy yeah you know i still think i still think he's gonna do

30:49Jason Stewart:that but anyway yeah we were talking about it on the last episode who's who's he more likely to pardon first guillan maxwell or sean puffy combs i for sure diddy i think see because i think that there and he might she he might do maxwell like in the dead of night because who the hell knows what's in those files like only he knows but um and and he's in there like a lot um what what the what the extent is is let me tell you that was very trumpian he's he's in there a lot a lot he is mentioned in the files a lot um or else they would have come out uh so you got a lot of people around him that'll like block the block the pen yeah on that um on that part and i think that the if he decides he wants to pardon Diddy, I think, I think everybody'll just kind of let that, just you do you.

31:36Tim Miller:I think he's so full of shit that I don't even, like, I don't believe that he actually believes the stuff that he's saying, if that makes sense. Like, I don't, I don't know. Yeah. I don't know if like, you're just coming to that now, 10 years in. I'm just saying like with the, with the like religion stuff specifically, I'm just like, bro, I like what? Like, I don't know. I just, I've started to, I try not to pay attention. Then when I do, I'm like, oh wait, this guy is just saying stuff because it works. I don't think there's any conviction behind anything, which is the key to being a politician or famous.

32:09Yeah. This is what I'm saying. Like it could have, if it wasn't for the racism, like it could have been a left populist Trump because, you know, like he has a couple of core things. Like since the eighties, he's thought that the Chinese and the Japanese were screwing us. Right. Like, and like, we've got dumb leaders. We're getting screwed. Bad deals, you know? So he was going to do tariffs, not bad deals, no matter what, no matter what.

32:29Jason Stewart:And he just released a hat that says Japan is back. Is that right? Or something like that? I miss that. I'm not visiting the White House store that often. Do yourself a favor. Yeah. Anti-immigrant and pro-tariff. And that's kind of it. Besides that, it's just like whatever the crowd was cheering for, he was into. Yeah, yeah. You know, and it just unfortunately turned out that like the crowd that showed up wanted some really gross stuff. You know, like the Muslim band thing, he was just kind of that was a one time trial at a rally. I was working for Jeb when that was happening and he kind of dropped out at an event and everybody started going crazy.

33:11And then all of a sudden it's like, OK, we're going to ban Muslims now. Like that.

33:14Tim Miller:You're saying it's like a you're saying it's like a band trying out a new song. Yeah. And the crowd loves it. You're like, all right, we're adding this to the set list. Yes, he road tested stuff because he road tests stuff that goes away. Greenland, for example, that's gone. We were doing the Greenland invasion for a while. And people were kind of into it when it felt subversive and fun. And then I was like, yeah, this is a little cringe now.

33:35Jason Stewart:People were kind of into Greenland, invading Greenland. Now we're focusing on Venezuela. Yeah, I guess. I think that's a Marco thing, though. I think he chooses these countries based on how fun it is for him to say them out loud. Venezuela. China had a good run. Venezuela is fun. Yeah. Greenland, it wasn't so fun to say in a Trump voice. Yeah, that's a good point.

33:53Tim Miller:Bro, I hope you get paid a lot of money for what you do because I got to say, man, I just can't be bothered. Everybody's too stupid. I can't even begin. I can read a headline and get a little into it, but then once it gets into the level of understanding that someone like you has to have to talk about this, I feel like, is this unprecedentedly bad? You've been doing this long enough. Will it get worse from here? how much better was it before how how are you mentally holding up okay yeah a lot there i it is i look my job like having to wake up and and care about this every day is the hardest part of my job way worse jobs out there you know like i'm not weed whacking yeah yeah right i'm not cleaning toilets like a lot of people have shitty like i don't have a shitty boss right like so a lot of worse jobs out there than mine but like having to care is the hardest part like there definitely are some days like i wake up on monday morning and i'm like i gotta talk to bill crystal again this morning and i'm like i just can't it's hard for me to like open up the computer you know i just can't care about this um today because this is why we drink yeah yeah that's why i have to that's why i have to live in new orleans and do fun stuff on the side and drink i can't live in dc and have it be my life uh you know and part of the hardest part is like i know these people it's like as annoying as this for you to watch it because it's like annoying and stupid i on a layer on top of that it's like i know these people and like they're the dumbest people that i worked twip right you know and so it's like you have to you have to so it's like combining your job is i have to pay attention to this stupid stuff and also i have to accept that like the worst people i ever encountered and the stupidest you ever encountered are now exceeding beyond their wildest dreams succeeding beyond their wildest dreams that's tough and so i'm yogain to deal with that doing some yoga and trying to just ujjayi breath my way through that part um on the well get worse probably and like the thing is like it is all trump driven right so we had this the range of outcomes for like 2025 through 2028 i was with chris hayes on election night we were talking about this and he was just like dude the range of outcomes is insane like it's literally like trump could just golf all day and status quo and nothing happens because he's just happy he's not in jail like or we could have nuclear holocaust you know it's like if other presidents had won there's kind of a narrow band of like a good presidency versus a bad presidency like the trump like the the the tail risk is so high but then also he might just kind of decide he just wants to build this ballroom and um and he wants trophies like the south korean guy gave him the crown recently and he likes trophies and he wants a peace prize and he wants to golf more and he's getting old and tired like that's kind of like the best case outcome in which case we would be at status quo, but also like he could deteriorate, get deranged.

36:40You know, his numbers could start to go down. He could start to get worried that the Democrats get back in and try to put him in jail again. He starts, you know what I mean? Like I just, an 82 year old guy in his last year who has unbelievable power and declining mental faculties. I don't know. I think 2020, it's pretty bad. That's my take.

36:59Tim Miller:But I guess, I guess what I'm saying is, has he, has he done so much damage that will it'll never be good again no matter who's in power yeah okay you mean even

37:09Jason Stewart:even longer past that like if if the new obama is elected and we have that great 2008 feeling all over again and everything's gonna be all good is that is it yeah is the wound unhealable i think it's on i mean there are elements that are unhealable so right like and look the immigration stuff's gonna get way worse just really quick on the next three years like they're like they're They're hiring the worst people in America right now to have power to go harass migrants and harass citizens on the street. You get a$50 ,000 bonus if you're a sadist and don't have a college degree and want a new job and don't really like brown people that much.

37:46Tim Miller:They used to just give those jobs and call it police, but now they get a bigger title. Yeah, better title now and more power and fewer oversight. No union guy checking you out to make sure you followed the rules. No body cams. So that's concerning. But then to your point, like, even if whatever, whoever your, your dream Democrat is wins in 2029, like there's some elements of this that are just broken. Like you go, sometimes like you make a choice in life and like you can recover from it. Like you can fix your life in certain ways, but like there's some things that are permanent, right? You know, I don't know.

38:19You know what I mean? Like if you get drunk and get in a car wreck and like are paraplegic, like you can't start walking again in the future. You can still find meaning in your life in a wheelchair, but like you, you, you fucked your life. And like, we're in a wheelchair, I guess is my point. Like we've hired the drunk driver. He's in charge. And like, you know, what do you do? Like cash Patel is the FBI director. They've put all of these flunkies all over the government. Like, how do you, do you fire all of them? I guess so. Right. How do you get USAID back? Like you probably don't. Right. Cause that's not popular.

38:49Like giving, giving money to poor people in Africa is not popular. The next Democrat doesn't want to waste any political capital on that. right like the the media environment that has got us here like the right-wing echo chamber it's only going to get worse with ai and so i mean i'm a i'm not like a doomer but i'm pretty pessimistic i think things can get better we can avoid the worst outcome i don't it's not inevitable that he becomes a dictator or whatever and the baron is our next leader or whatever you think the worst outcome is but like there's some elements that we're not going to be able to get back about just kind of business as usual, if you will.

39:25Have you considered leaving the country? I know. I'm like, I'm like the Leo character in Wolf of Wall Street. Yeah. I'm not fucking going anywhere. No, they can, they have to pull me out. Um, no, I'm not going anywhere. Um, I don't, I guess I, my buddy JBL, who is considering leaving the country, he goes, I'm willing to be the first podcaster killed, but I'm not willing to be the second. And like, there is something to that like i'm not at the top of these guys target list right like and so i don't know if they start to j if comey goes to jail which you know i think that their retribution efforts are trying now with tish james and james comey i think that's what's gonna fail right but i don't know if comey and tish james end up in jail all right and then like then they start going after media members and you know i don't know who knows what the future holds but i'm not fleeing that's

40:17Tim Miller:why we talk about tv shows and stuff you know what i mean nobody's coming nobody's coming for us

40:21Jason Stewart:we talk about pour over coffee and hot pilates i don't think anybody's coming for me i don't know man sometimes i i didn't really like there's this new york times article with like these professors that like moved to toronto and they're like we studied autocracy and we know what's coming and now now we fled i was kind of like man y 'all are pussy yeah even if you're right like isn't it your obligation to fight? Yeah, good point. Like, it's not over. Like, it's not, we're not, it's not Hitler yet. Like, okay, like, yeah, I mean, we've got some Orban-y, Hungarian flavor right now in our country for sure, but like, you can go to Budapest if you want to right now and go and speak your mind and travel there and travel back and not worry about the secret police coming for you.

41:06You know what I mean? Like, autocracy is this word that people on my side, like the anti-Trump or democracy movement, use, but sometimes I feel like it confuses more than it helps people understand, right? Because Viktor Orban is an autocrat in Hungary, and that's still a mostly pretty much a free country. And like Kim Jong-un is an autocrat, right? And like their people can't eat. And like, if you say, I mean, if you criticize the little fat boy, you get killed, right? So like autocracy is like a huge spectrum, right? And I just, we're certainly in the fighting part of it now. Like this is not, like you guys are just living your lives talking about pour overs right like you know like in a country that is a really in a dangerous autocracy like it's impacting you like it's impacting some people now migrant immigrant if you're a recent immigrant if you're in a mixed family like if you're a trans person like so there's some people that are a threat now but like not white professors at yale like you're fine yeah they don't need to escape to rosedale they're gonna be fine you're right i won't be jailed if

42:03Jason Stewart:i don't cry at an official funeral or whatever you know what i mean yeah there are some thoughts I mean, again, if you're dating somebody from overseas and they want to come visit you and they said some mean things about Charlie Kirk on Twitter, that could affect your relationship. So there are little things or mean things about Israel or whatever. So things are going a wrong direction for sure, but not fleeing level.

42:26Tim Miller:Yeah. No, I'm anti-Flee. I love Flea the bass player. I'm saying Flea, F-L-E-E. Yeah.

42:45Tim Miller:Good energy in. Good energy out.

42:53Storm.

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43:30Did you know Sam's Club isn't a store? It's actually a club with cool finds and like a whole community.

43:36Jason Stewart:It's a club. Of course, Jason. It's in the name. Sam's Club. Oh, yeah. Come join us. Sam's Club. You mentioned AI, just how that's going to make things probably much worse for right-wing propaganda and everything like that. i've been noticing on twitter homeland security whitehouse.gov official accounts of our government sorry bro that's good some of the worst ai slop i love all time like donald trump dropping like dog shit from an airplane onto his enemy you like that i interviewed the dude harry sisson who's like a democratic influencer bro who's the guy that got shit on um and he i was like and he and i was like and he used to say the same thing people like are you worried they're coming from you and harry's like dude no my engagement is through the roof right now like great um i just got a yo play deal this somebody sent me some friends so they did an ai friends yeah yeah uh thing that's going around on tiktok that's the worst ai slop shit ever so uh there's worse shit than the lighthouse yeah i mean there's there's there's bad ai slop all over the place but i guess my hang up is like what does it say to our uh about our country to the rest of the world that we're using our government PR outreach accounts to post Donald Trump, but his head is on a transformer body.

45:01Jason Stewart:And he's like, who is this appealing to? It's appealing to the people who like to have fun.

45:07Tim Miller:That's what it is. People who have a sense of humor. That's what it is. I mean, it definitely demonstrates a lack of seriousness to the world. But I think we kind of passed that point when we elected our stupidest reality show host a second time.

45:19Jason Stewart:um so i you know but then every country has stupid people you know like this is uh this is everywhere so i guess it doesn't matter so i don't yeah i know but i i think that the ai stuff matters less to me like trump goofing off i mean it's it's really unserious and i wish we could fix it but i think it's i think that's one of the things that has inevitably changed now because like the zoomers like this is their life they've like grown up in this like it would seem weird to like go back to mit romney for them um but the white nationalist stuff coming from the government worries me way more i mean i just i think that there are a lot of i think any whoever is doing the digital strategy for the department of homeland security i think one day in their future will lie about the fact that they were doing that um because like no the only lie only lie of theo

46:04Tim Miller:vaughn's pressing him backstage somewhere i think they're proud of it i think they're proud maybe i don't know man like doing snuff films with like asmr of like people in chains and then like it's It's crazy. It's like 1930s white meme. Have you seen the Department of Labor memes they've been putting out? The Department of Labor is putting out this like work America, and it's 20 different like 1930s. I'm blanking. What's the painter's name that does like the Americana paintings?

46:32Jason Stewart:Norman Rockwell. Yeah, yeah. They're doing like Norman Rockwell shit with just brawny white guys. And it's like a blonde, and then it's a brunette, and then it's like a white guy in church and his wife is looking adoringly at him. And it's like, what the? And it's all just white dudes. Not even one Asian in there. And I'm just like, it's just overtly like white nationalist agitprop that's coming from our government. And the Department of War wants, like we don't care about anything else going on in the world as long as our soldiers don't have a beard and are like hot looking to me is what Hegseth seems to be after.

47:10Tim Miller:Yeah.

47:10Jason Stewart:That and only that.

47:11Tim Miller:Even though I have a beard right now, I would prefer my soldiers, like my baseball players, like the Yankees, and they're beard-free. Really? Yeah, let's keep it high. You're like Steinbrenner when it comes to your baseball players? No Don Mattingly and that fucking mustache? You shave that shit. Trim those sideburns, Mattingly. Something that really gets my goat is the current mustache trend, the mullet-mustache combo. And that feels like something that's taken hold of our service people. Dude, and you say that as a hat, like as a gay. It's awful, man. It's awful. I went to a The Dare show. Hell yeah.

47:47Tim Miller:Okay. And it's just like. Shout out to Derrison. Everybody there has a fucking mustache and a tight shirt and huge pants. It's like, how am I supposed to tell who's gay anymore? Like, they all dress the same. And, like, the mustaches are horrible. I need to say this because, and Harrison's a dear friend of ours. We love him. But I didn't know this, Jason. Maybe you did that. azalea banks called him std sound system which is really really good that's really funny really

48:14Jason Stewart:funny she's she's revealed herself to be an awful person but when she hits she hits all right so

48:19Tim Miller:you're saying you went to the dare in new orleans and you're saying i was in dc actually i happened to be in town but even worse okay you're in dc and you're saying you go to the show and you these guys all have the same haircut the same look and it used to be you know you got the the ear pierced or the bandana hanging out of the pocket. I know who I'm fucking tonight.

48:37Jason Stewart:So maybe a little too much equality at play is what you're saying. Or the jean size. Like the jean size. A, like look, in the aughts, man, nobody had a mustache. And if they did, they were straight. Yeah, yeah. And if they were gay with a mustache, I didn't want to kiss them anyway, so it wasn't a problem, right? And then you could just do a jean analysis, right? And it's just like, well, if you're in skinny jeans, then this is probably a go. Maybe not, but it's at least an open door. dad baggy jeans no so now but now all that is gone there's no difference like all they're all wearing huge pants and they all have a mustache everybody has a mustache okay so it's so like when you would hear you know people would say like oh well you know you you were you're asking for it dressed like that you're saying that to everyone like everyone can get it because they're yeah no i'm also saying you're asking for it but like in a good way like in a good way got it got it Of course.

49:32Jason Stewart:When it's guy on guy, it's totally fine. We agree with that.

49:35Tim Miller:Gay stuff doesn't count. That's what we say on this podcast all the time. Oh, really? When it comes to crimes. Not in daily life. Not in daily life.

49:46Jason Stewart:I've been assaulted by a man before. I don't need to see a therapist about it. And that's a privilege for me.

49:54Tim Miller:He's not letting it define him, is what he's saying. My straight guy friends just get totally ranked based on who can come to the gay bar, get their ass grabbed, and be chill about it. Okay. So you're saying you have some friends that are like, it's cool that you're gay. You're my boy. Yeah. But I ain't going into the belly of the beast to get touched. I don't want anybody touching my butt. Yeah. And to be honest, it makes me wonder a little bit. Like if there's a Kinsey situation happening. Doth protests too much. Yeah. It does make me wonder a little bit. Yeah. It's about half and half, I'd say.

50:26Jason Stewart:What do you say about the influx of straight people entering gay spaces? Horrible. Horrible, dude. We have a, like, I had a no girls, no girls at the gay bar after midnight. No girls at the gay bar after midnight. I'm sorry. What about straight guys? If it's a clock strike at midnight, get the fuck. No, no, no. If you're a lesbian, obviously, if you're non-binary trans woman. Like, if you're a straight woman, get the fuck out of the gay bar at midnight.

50:52Tim Miller:You can say, I know what you're trying to say, Tim. If you're a fat, straight woman, get out of the gay bar. That's what you're trying to say. No clit in the pit. No clit in the pit. If you're a hot, straight woman. No, actually, I mean, I'm not above that, but I'm specific. Even hot women are worse kind of because they want to dance with you. They think you want attention. I'm like, no. They think they're above the wall. This is not your space anymore. We can come for happy hour, you know, whatever, drag brunch, as you mentioned earlier, fine. But, like, no. And it makes me feel sad. I forget who I was talking to about this, but, like, it makes me feel a little sad.

51:21I was in L.A. recently. I was in what the fuck is it on the east side Silver Lake and I went to the gay bar with a friend and it's just like it's like half women did you go to Ackbar? Ackbar it was Ackbar yeah it was like half women and I was like what's happening and I think that like the women want to be able to go and dance and not get hassled right basically which I totally get and respect but then you should just have a straight women only bar you know you should have your space why can't they have their space is that wrong?

51:49Jason Stewart:they want their cake and to eat it too they want to be able to look at hot shirtless guys without being you know oogled by them and picked up by them you know part of life though is like you know hard choices you know sacrifices i can't have it all i couldn't agree more i couldn't agree more well what can we do to create these safe spaces you know to keep them safe and free from these straight women do we bully them is it a door policy you know what do How do we keep them up? Pepper spray? Well, there was a bar in DC that had a no heels policy, which I liked. That's pretty good. A no heels policy is kind of like a soft ban on women.

52:27I like that. But I also am for shaming. I think shaming is okay. Welcome home, Tim. Welcome home.

52:34Jason Stewart:Drag that bitch out of here. Okay. No, not physical. Well, yeah. Ackbar is too much of a safe space for all sexualities nowadays. There's other darker dungeons that you can visit next time you're in town. Okay, yeah. and this might just be me being middle you know being out of a game now a little bit you know no

52:49Tim Miller:i mean there's there's places that i hear like i i remember so distinctly being with three gay homies and they started talking about like clubs or bars that they're and it was words i'd never heard like words i'd never heard before yeah and i was like what do you got like what do you remember any of those words mama no it was literally like it wasn't basement it wasn't shit i've heard it was literally stuff that i was like i'm sorry what what is that and they're like oh what it's it's I think there's a level that we are not even aware of where it's really going down is what I'm saying. Is that a challenge for you guys?

53:22It's like, hat, middle-aged men now doing a culture pod, like trying to stay with it. Have you given up on that? Are you just working harder?

53:31Tim Miller:Tim, I'm going to die with it, bro. That's all I got. I have no talent. I have no skills. I'm online.

53:37Jason Stewart:We know about shit that we should not be knowing about as middle-aged straight men who are married. Anything you want. Good and bad.

53:44Tim Miller:Yeah, I mean, actually, the stuff we know least about is probably sports, to be completely honest with you. That's probably our biggest blind spot.

53:52Jason Stewart:Yeah, we don't know about NCAA shit, but if a cosmetic company just went public, we know the IPO will come out. You know what I mean? So you're saving a lot. That makes sense, though. You're saving brain space. Maybe I need to cut out one of my sports to add some brain space for what's the scene.

54:09Tim Miller:I think the sports thing, in this realm at least, I feel like it's probably the most popular thing to talk about on this medium. As far as podcasting goes. Politics and sports. Politics and sports, the two things that we care about the least, probably, are the number one ways to dominate the space.

54:32Jason Stewart:We're doing it the hard way. We're doing it the hard way. And I appreciate you having me on because I was kind of going through your past. And I don't know if it was your most recent politics guest, but one of the ones, which has been a while. Which is you and Jake Tapper. Yeah, it was a little tiff because of your anti-cop actions. And I was kind of worried about that coming on. My daughter's interested in being a firefighter. And I thought, I don't know, maybe these guys think all firefighters are racist or something. I don't know. No, no. It could be a problem. No. Anyone can be a firefighter as long as they're not a woman.

55:03Jason Stewart:I think we can all agree with that, Tim, right?

55:05Tim Miller:Yeah, what do you mean? They let women become firefighters? Dudes of all colors. I honestly forget in my daily life that there are people who won't make fun of cops. I really don't. I forget that those people exist because I encounter them so infrequently.

55:21Jason Stewart:But you could tell, just like how you could tell when it's pornography or not, you can tell when a kid wants to be a cop because they're a good person who wants to be a good cop and make their community better. And you could tell when somebody wants to be a cop so they can have free reign to beat up minorities and people that they hate. And so you were just asking Jake just to kind of make sure which one he wants. That was all. I think it was a very, very good. I think it's hard to tell which way his son's leaning.

55:49Tim Miller:It was a very well-timed joke. And I want to be clear. Jake has apologized. We've talked. Oh, cool. He felt bad about it after I approached him. But he did feel bad about it. but I think that the real criminal here is, is what's his name? Your guy, Jason. Oh, Scott Galloway. Scott Galloway was the one kind of poking him. Needling. Yeah. He was, he was the one leading the charge. And he also, the funniest part about the whole thing was they didn't say the name of the podcast and they had both been on the podcast. That was my favorite part. That's so, that's pro on another level that I, I couldn't, my brain doesn't work like that.

56:24Yeah. No shout out. Okay. Well, that's cool. So I guess all I'm saying is that was, you know, potentially a negative experience for you guys like dabbling into the politics no no so you know

56:33Tim Miller:i'm happy that i overcame that no i like the politics space because it's like i it's i have no skin i don't give a fuck like you know you know what i mean like i i i don't um you have a

56:43Jason Stewart:little skin in the game sure yeah to me to me it was just like like going skydiving for the first time like for a very short amount of time where i would open my phone and be like oh cnn boom boom like wow this is getting kind of crazy and then it's over 48 hours later this is a good no this is a good lesson about politics drama these days in the trump era is just fucking ride it out man the uh the urban outfitters dude was on um i don't want to do the thing that jake and scott did to you i think it was the semaphore podcast and not urban outfitters american eagle american eagle i

57:17Tim Miller:love i love that they used a picture of sydney sweeney to promote the middle-aged white guy who's the CMO or whatever of American Eagle. Genius move, genius move. Yeah, so anyway, so he goes on, and they're like, what was your lessons for the Sidney Sweeney controversy? And he was just like, do nothing. Don't support the crisis comms industrial complex. Ride it out. And that was exactly right. That dude was spot on about that analysis. This day and age, man, this stuff blows over. Just kind of either ride it out or lean in to get more attention for yourself. Honestly, the best thing you guys could have done was try to get some I was canceled by Jake Tapper attention because that's how you sell stadiums now, man.

57:59Tim Miller:Yeah, that's true. There was an email from Fox News. One of my friends in the industry was like, look, if you really want to do this, you can basically be like, I'll give you a comment but you have to put me on the air. And I was like, yeah, I don't think I want to do that. I think I'm all set. I think I'm all set on this.

58:17Jason Stewart:I don't want to do a tight five with Gutfeld at 7.30 tonight.

58:20Tim Miller:Yeah, but I think you're right, Tim. I think you're like, the way the world moves now, I don't know what lasts. I can't think of the last thing that's lasted for more than 48 hours.

58:30Jason Stewart:Yeah, like this morning I woke up and I was like, oh, Trump is going to start testing nuclear weapons for the first time in 30 years. Okay, well, time to walk the dog, you know? And then in two days, we'll forgot about that and it'll be another thing.

58:46Tim Miller:Yeah, I woke up today. I saw Sidney Sweeney in a see-through dress at an award show. I heard about nuclear. Like, none of it's going to stick. Like, good or bad, it doesn't stick is what I'm trying to say.

58:57Jason Stewart:They can try to blur out the nipples in post, but we'll find the originals. You know what I mean, Tim?

59:01Tim Miller:But it's with movies and TV and albums. It's like stuff just comes in gut. It's not like we were growing up. Like, the Janet Jackson. I was trying to think. What would be an equivalent of the Sidney Sweeney thing? The Janet Jackson thing. Like, for years, the nips. Like, if you would have talked about her eight years later, you'd have had to have mentioned the nips left. I'm mentioning it right now 20 years later. however 30 who the fuck knows when that was you know and it's genuinely affected her career negatively yeah like that's just not that that would not be the situation for a city's man no it's it's it's it's good and bad but i think when there's this level of of sort of content being produced at all different levels there's no way to keep there's there's no way for anything to stick it's going to take like remember benson boone we talked about benson boone every day for three weeks you did thought about benson boone's little twink ass in years on this show What was the material?

59:49Tim Miller:Yeah, because he came out of nowhere. He's backflipping everywhere. He's fucking annoying. He sucks.

59:54Jason Stewart:We just made fun of him. Yeah. It was a fun target to make fun of. Was he a plant? I don't really understand what people mean when they say an industry plant, but that's something people say.

1:00:04Tim Miller:Industry plant, in my estimation, means that you have familial connections in the music business or whatever the Hollywood. you know like it's it's sort of it can also be like we signed you when you were 13 and groomed

1:00:19Jason Stewart:you yeah you didn't you didn't come up through the long system and gigging around town and touring either way for years you know got it like the like the lady whatever the opposite of lady gaga is he so he was obviously like auditioned to be on he was on like the voice or on american

1:00:34Tim Miller:idol okay the way that things happen now is just different it's it's not about like skill level it's about eyeballs so it's a different if you have like all these people are famous because they were on vine or tiktok that's because addison ray had the eyeballs first and they were like oh you can sing shit all right come on let's do it like it's not you know and that's fine i don't think that's necessarily bad but yeah that is not touring for five years in a van with eight guys you know it's a very different thing it's a very different thing some people have to decide

1:01:02Jason Stewart:that you're a pop star it's kind of not the other way around you don't you i'm not doing the shows at the 930 club on a Tuesday opening for blah, blah, blah when I'm trying to be the next. In some ways, it's not that different. I mean, like with Louisiana Love, like Addison Rae and Britney's rise was not like so different, right? It's true. It's true. I mean, Britney wasn't gigging before like she like hit a big.

1:01:23Tim Miller:It's actually more similar because Britney was on TV and Addison was on YouTube, which is basically TV at this point. Yeah, I mean, you're right in that sense. I just don't know, like, Somber, you know, who's the new Benson Boone. That is fake, right? Is that a real, like, does that person exist or is that like an AI avatar that just gets into my TikTok? He's a rare long twink. He's very thin. He's very thin, so he could be confused as AI. I just thought maybe that, like, I was being targeted with him because, you know, that tends to be my genre of. No, you would consume? That I would consume?

1:02:01Yeah, sure. directionally speaking and he's like directionally speaking i meant uh i meant on my i meant on my for you page but sure in real life from time to time um right um i have my p but uh uh so i thought maybe it was just like they're testing me and they're like is like you know like what if we what if we made him a what if we made him a singer would you be interested in i was like this is bad

1:02:24Jason Stewart:well but people like it like singing they'll go maybe what if he makes cookies is that more your speed i mean it's kind of it's like when uh when i give my dog bean a piece of chicken she's like what's the catch what's going on here you're gonna snatch me and take me to the vet you're when it's when somber appears on your phone one day you're like okay what's the yeah i think that i is trying to combine your interests like we know you're into basketball and indie and indie music and twinks like what if we like created what if we created an artificial combo there There's a shaggy haired white guy who's built like Wemby.

1:03:00Would you like this? And like the answer was no. I think this is uncanny valley. This doesn't feel real, but you're telling me it is real. That's really.

1:03:08Jason Stewart:Allegedly. Haven't met the guy in person, but I think he does seem to be real. I know that his mom is hot. Hot mom.

1:03:15Tim Miller:Hot mom. There's some backlash. There's some backlash now because this sort of millennial woman went on TikTok and talked about how bad the show was. and he responded. But one of the things that she said, and I was talking to my friend Ryland about it and we agreed, he makes his fans bark like dogs when he's on command and we both agree that that is unfortunately cool.

1:03:37Jason Stewart:I did not know that. I didn't know he did pup play. The pup play is a little bit of a, that's a signal to your community, isn't it? I was like,

1:03:45Tim Miller:having so little respect for your teenage girlfriends that you make them bark like dogs in the audience.

1:03:52Jason Stewart:He's got the Hassan Piker shot collar. He's wearing it every time. It's like when you go out to dinner with one of your, you know, a date and they've got the collar on and you're hitting it under the table. And ooh, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. Get a little spicy at Chili's. I'm interested in barking. You're like, okay, the more you say it, the better it's starting to sound. Okay, well, you were talking about the Denver Nuggets. Yeah. What are some of your favorite basketball players? and I'm not talking about their offensive rebounding abilities. We're talking about daddies only.

1:04:26Oh, daddies? Oh, Aaron Gordon is like there's not even. Aaron Gordon. He's so far above the competition.

1:04:34Jason Stewart:Okay. Well, we're so not. Okay. I had to Google this person. Zach Levine probably. Aaron Gordon is beautiful on the court and off. Zach Levine is just more of an aesthetic thing. His play is not that great to watch. Tim has a type let's see what's going on here Tim

1:04:53Tim Miller:you're saying you could look past his stat sheet because everything else is looking good got it yeah Zach Coffin I mean you know in the classic and the more famous category Steph is objectively handsome

1:05:07Jason Stewart:okay so you hear first Tim Miller team light skin is really what it's starting to sound like

1:05:12Tim Miller:yeah I didn't know you were a yellow bone guy but I'm glad to hear that okay Okay, those are just the people that come to mind. I don't discriminate that way. So have you spent any time with NBA players? Not sexually. I just mean have you hung out with them in your life? Have you spent any time with an NBA player? No, not that I can think of. I've been watching Top 5 on Netflix, and what I noticed about NBA players and all athletes of that caliber, and this would be hard for you in any sexual conquest, is that they're never alone. Ever. They're always with a brother, a sister, a trainer, a mom, dad, a coach, a teammate.

1:05:55Tim Miller:I don't know when these guys get five minutes to themselves. I don't understand how they recalibrate. I mean, Magic figured it out. I don't know. It's a good question. Magic figured it out. Oh, no. They're fucking chicks. I'm not saying that on the road. Oh, you mean if it's a DL situation? Yeah, DL situation. I should have shouted out Ja. Ja's really hot. And he got, but he went to the strip club when he was in Denver and that was, he went to Shotgun Willys. And that was where he brought out the gun and now he got into trouble. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So I don't know if I'm, I don't know if he's probably not, not targetable.

1:06:29I'm not trying to target, I'm not trying to target DL guys. Like that's not for me. I want everybody to feel totally respected by me. If I met Aaron Gordon at a, at a, at Tipitina's and he wanted to come see a concert, I would not, I would not do anything inappropriate. yeah i not do anything inappropriate nothing you know i'm only sealed well your lips are

1:06:50Jason Stewart:unsealed and then sealed after yeah okay oh good no good the world needs more people like you we have to respect our down low homies we do and i got nothing but love for them it's just not my not my cup of tea okay well on this on this same realm of convo i saw a clip and you uh you said something I wanted to expand on. You said, all my fetishes are achievable by the human body. Yeah. Because you were talking about some type of anime style fetish porn where people are doing things that are not physically possible in the human realm. Yeah, the Canadian these Canadian guys have a podcast. I don't remember what it's called, so I feel bad not shouting them out.

1:07:30But they're telling me about Vore. Don't, uh-huh. I don't know what that is.

1:07:35Jason Stewart:I learned what it was from the clip. Okay, great. So wait, so we're all on the same page. This is like the Zoomers. No, we're not. No, we're not. The Zoomers are in a different – No, we're on the same page and not knowing. They're in a different world. The Gen Alpha and the Zoomers are in a different world. Like they've gotten bored by normal fetishes. Like they're not interested in whatever, choking, spanking. Or they're interested in that, but they need to go further. It's just because they've grown up with porn on their phones. And so they need imaginary anime porn. And so they've created this thing called Vore, which is like imagining that somebody's mouth can be unhinged and then they could eat your whole head.

1:08:11Yeah, Chris, what was that book that we were reading?

1:08:14Tim Miller:Oh, I was about to say, Perfection. That was in like, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. And they were telling me about that and I was like, I don't know what you're talking about and that doesn't do anything for me. I'm not into fantasy porn. I'm not into what could happen in the magical forest between me and a unicorn man. I think the kids are different these days.

1:08:37Jason Stewart:No NBA fan fiction? Is there NBA erotica? Definitely. You know, guys, I'm sure I have so many, what's the word? I have a lot of different addictions to things I shouldn't. But porn is just not for me. I'm not like, I don't know. I got nothing. I don't know what kind of erotica is out there. I know nothing about the erotica scene at all. I'm like, rather make it than watch it. I'm with you, brother.

1:09:05Tim Miller:Addiction-wise, what do you think you could scale back on if you had to choose one thing? I mean, my phone. Healthy or unhealthy. You know what I mean? Yeah. I mean, my phone would be the first one for sure. And then basically all the - Regular stuff. Narcotics. Okay. All the regular stuff. I could dial back in all of them. I mean, I don't know. I've already cut back on weed. I cut way back. I don't do weed anymore, basically. because I was a really big pothead in college and I basically don't ever do weed anymore. I get a show maybe sometimes or like one little baby hit while I'm watching a movie, but like that's it.

1:09:42All the rest of them though, I'm sure I could dial back on and gain some bodily health.

1:09:48Tim Miller:I was listening to an old episode of a podcast yesterday because I was in Florida and I'd run out of podcasts and John from Pod Save America was on. Which one? The gay one or the straight one? The gay one. And he was talking about edibles like it was heroin. He was talking about edibles like it was crack. Him and Neil Brennan were talking about edibles like it was crack cocaine. You got to be careful. You can get to... I was like, who's going to tell this guy that it gets worse? It gets a lot worse. I think you might be the guy for the job. I love those guys. They all were kind of nerds. I hung out with Lovett back when we were kids in our 20s.

1:10:29and um you know he wasn't he wasn't hanging at the gay bar like me okay like like you know he was more over in the corner uh you know i'd have a little you know whatever like a little cosmo or something and i have one or two hopefully i get flirted with and like that's the night out for him you know we were on a different level and so i i understand why the 15 milligram gummy um for love it is probably pretty intense you know like that's it i was just i was just listening to

1:10:57Tim Miller:it and it was from a couple i think it was a couple years old but i was listening to it and i was like i i haven't heard people talk like this about edibles maybe ever in my life or in a very

1:11:06Jason Stewart:at least a very very long time well i think with just to push back a little bit i think with the edibles it has such a psychoactive effect on some people sure compared you know like if anyone does heroin you know you see videos of someone's aunt coming out of surgery and they're hopped up on morphine they're having the time of their life everything is all good in the wrong situations in the wrong set and setting five milligrams of an edible can send somebody to the loony bin you know what i mean if they're not mentally capable oh yeah yeah if they're bitch made i totally agree with you and i am totally bitch made on that stuff by the way like uh my i was um i did some mushrooms speaking of uh std sound system i did some mushrooms at the lcd sound system show in New Orleans.

1:11:51Okay. And so like that, you guys know the crowd. It's just us. It's like us. It's just like, that's why I don't go. That's why I don't go. Not because they're music. It's just the cool parents from school is basically who's at the LCD show. And then like a cool in quotes,

1:12:02Jason Stewart:but yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Cool. You know, relatively sure. Relative. It's all relative. And then you've got, I mean, I don't live in fucking Greenpoint. Okay. You know, so like there aren't any parents, there aren't too many parents who are down the cool, who are on further along the cool music path than lcd lcd is kind of like where you can get to um in the south and um and so you know i took i just i didn't take that many money i just took a little bit of mushrooms that my friends were doing and i just i'm bitch my mind i just my mind is not strong you know so i started going to a bad place i was enjoying the show my mind is not strong and i walk out and it's just like it's like three parents from school wanted to talk to me like somebody listens to the podcast wanted to do a selfie and i just like i looked at my friend and i was like get me the fuck out of here right now like i need to go hide in a dark room in a corner and think about my choices you did the wrong drug you gotta do coke you gotta do coke in that setting it is a coke setter i guess

1:12:54Tim Miller:i've just been sober for too long i didn't think about the fact that you could be fucked up and some fan wants to come up and talk to you oh yeah that didn't happen to you jason oh many times many

1:13:04Jason Stewart:times but i'm but it's rare that i'm uh you know out socially like that on on mushrooms it's usually something where I'm a little bit more, maybe a little too down for the selfie. You guys like me? Well, yeah, I'll pose it to everyone. Same. I love the attention. The attention is, why are you doing a podcast if you don't want people to say hi to you at the airport? I'm down for all that. You hear that, Chris? You hear that, Chris? Well, I'd like to make money, but yeah. Yeah. Everybody else, though, like, no, on mushrooms, it's not. And it's the same with the gay ball rule. Like after midnight, don't say you like my podcast and don't be a woman at the gay bar.

1:13:44And if I'm on mushrooms, that's just not your fault. That's a me fault.

1:13:48Jason Stewart:Okay, so Tim Miller, he does not accept the fuck a fan challenge is what you're saying? No, no. Okay, these are good, hard, and fast rules. Do we want to do top five prescription drugs while we're on the subject of narcotics? Sure, I mean, if you guys want to. It's a recurring segment on our show that we ask certain people, and it seems like you're down for pill play. I seem like I'm down. Did you ask Jake Tamper? No. Not so much. He's going to say, I take my daily vitamin. One time I took Advil. Top five prescription drugs. Yeah, I'm not really a big pill bottle guy. It can be recreational or just regular, but you know.

1:14:28Yeah, I don't know if I can even get to five. So the only drug I ever quit cold turkey was Xanax. because in college, I was doing Xanax and drinking together. And God, I hope that my mom is listening to this podcast at this point. But if you are, it's time to stop. I would just wake up on somebody's couch and look around and be like, where am I? I don't know whose house I'm at. I don't know where my car is. And that's the type of blackout you don't want to do. So I just went cold turkey, no more Xanax. I had one bad experience in college.

1:15:03Jason Stewart:Whose dick is this? that kind of thing. Yeah, and I was in the closet then, so I never, I don't think I noticed any of that. But just general, just bad behaviors. But obviously, if it's so good that you have to quit it, obviously at the top of the list, you know? Yeah, yeah. Valium is really good as a landing gear. That's nice, I would say. Say more on the landing gear of it all as it pertains to Valium, please. I think kind of that's an if you know, you know situation. And then I guess number three would be, um adderall probably um you know just uh little and and the other the more positive story about adderall from my college days is a gw um like the george the other kids used to make fun of us all for having blue boogers because like people are just snorting adderall so much yeah yeah like people used to make blue boogers jokes in college george washington smurfs yes smurfs I was just thinking yesterday I would probably be in a better place in my life if I enjoyed and used Adderall I never really took to it I'm not an antidepressants person really or downers what are the other popular nominees?

1:16:22we've gone a lot of SSRIs with people

1:16:26Jason Stewart:Xanax is probably Oxycontin in the bad old days?

1:16:32Tim Miller:Yeah.

1:16:33Jason Stewart:Chris is writing a book about it right now.

1:16:36Tim Miller:Are you? Yeah. That was my... Downfall is dramatic, but downfall. Can I hear about that? As far as drugs go. I'm sorry if you already talked about this in the pod. You can get it in 2027 from Simon & Schuster. No, it is... Okay, awesome. No, I'm joking. I'm joking. Yeah, I mean, I was just addicted to OxyContin. Pretty simple. Yeah. In that era where it was very popular, like the news cycle liked it a lot. It was like - Yeah, like when we were in high school and college, like 05 or whatever? No, no, no, no, no. Later? Yeah, this is like when New York Times would send documentary photographers to West Virginia and Florida to talk about the pill mills and like how it was ruining our country.

1:17:17Jason Stewart:Like 10 years ago or so? Yeah, 10 years ago.

1:17:20Tim Miller:It was like pre-Fentanyl sort of era. I only did OxyContin like once or twice in college when it was bad. And I was on summer vacation for college one time when I did it with my friends, it's like, I guess it must've been a Saturday night. Cause Sunday was church. And, um, I, I wasn't really going to church with my parents that much, but like from time to time I would, you know, just to keep up, keep up friendliness in the household, you know, be a good soldier, that kind of thing. And, um, I just did it the night before and woke up and I was so fucking wrecked the next day. Like I walked into the kitchen and like sat down and started like drinking Gatorade.

1:17:51And my dad was walking down to go to church. He looks at me, are you going? And I was like, no, I don't know. I can't go. And he looks at me. He's like, I don't know what you did last night, but it was not beer. Wow. And you should stop doing that anymore. It was just beer on my face. Like he just looked at me and was like, that is not a hangover. I was like, whatever you did last night is too hard for you. And my father was right about that. It was. Good parenting. I didn't ever go your path.

1:18:12Tim Miller:That is good parenting. That is good parenting. When did you come out? I came out when I was, what, 24? So like a little bit after college. I came out at, it was like a after school special. I came out at Thanksgiving dinner, drunk every family drunk everybody yelling everybody yelling about it like me storming out of the house walking to my friend's house like full full deal so so they were you're saying they weren't uh super happy with the news not super cool they're great now so i don't want to you know it was catholic man really catholic like daily church going catholic so it's a little bit of a it's a little bit of a you know surprise um learning curve yeah and i i don't know you know not to not doing like the mask for mass thing i have some very gay characteristics but like it wasn't obvious you know what i mean like i don't i don't think that i think they were caught i think they were blindsided a little bit um so anyway uh yeah i did that um that is late that is pretty late though that is pretty it was pretty late yeah it was pretty late um i thought i yeah i thought i could do it the other way i was like you know whatever i had like a girlfriend and it was fine and i like i went through a period of time where i was like i knew that i was i knew i I was at least bi or whatever.

1:19:21And I knew I was gay, but I was just like, man, that seems hard. Like the family thing will be hard. Like it'll be tough to get into. And then like, once I pulled the bandaid off, I was like, what in the fuck have I been doing? This was such a huge mistake.

1:19:31Tim Miller:You weren't doing your thing like quietly before. No, I mean like once or twice when black got drunk. Interesting. Wow. Yeah, really like once or twice. Yeah. Old school. And I guess I should, I guess I should be honest. Was that honest? We're on, we're on radical candor is important on a podcast. Was it, I can really only think of twice. Were they, Was it with gay guys there? Yeah, with gay guys. Well, no, no, no. One time was with, the first time was like, it was a classic. Freshman year dorm, bisexual roommate, got a tongue piercing. Everybody's wasted. And he's so excited about his tongue piercing and people are like, do you want to kiss to see what it feels like?

1:20:09And I was like, yeah, I'll kiss you to see what it feels like. And everybody's like, you wouldn't kiss another guy to see what it feels like. I was like, sure I would. Kiss the tongue piercing roommate that night went further than tongue kissing. Let's just say it went further than tongue kissing that night. And then that was kind of a wake-up call. But then I sent it back down. I sent it back down deep inside of me. For a while I was like no. Don't think about that.

1:20:35Jason Stewart:Don't think about that glorious head I got. And then I was so annoyed that my fucking college bestie, my aforementioned college bestie from Baton Rouge, when I came out like six years later he was the one person that was like, duh. and I was like what do you mean duh and he's like everybody saw you fucking going getting down on that dude in your door and I was like well why didn't you let me off the hook back then I was like why have you been and he's like I don't know I thought it'd be rude to bring up I was like if you would have told me you knew I had a suspicion you were gay when I saw you hooking up with a guy then you could have been a like a sounding board all these years later yeah that could have saved everybody a lot of time hindsight yeah that's really funny that's a good story

1:21:12Tim Miller:though i like that i like that old school all right tim well thank you for taking the time to chat with us that is it one dorm room tongue kissing is the end of the pod you don't have any other donald trump takes you need for anything you feel like you got it i think we got it we didn't do oasis really quick we didn't do oasis can i do oasis for one minute yeah oasis in manchester was just dude oh you went to man oh you went to manchester it was unbelievable it was the best thing uh i was listening to your guys post oasis show talk about it and it was just it was i mean uh like obviously it's cliche it was just like biblical i like everybody around me i went to chicago too and it was fine it was great in chicago but like the manchester thing everyone knew every word the little by little and all the deep cuts like everyone knew every word and sang every word people were throwing fucking beers on me and i did no piss uh that i know of but like everybody's bond the brits were so happy we were there like all my louisiana friends have more of an accent than me so hearing southern accents are like you're americans like they're giving us like they gave us their bucket hats you know we were sharing cigarettes and it was just it was a communal love fest it was really great no it's it really is it was beautiful unfortunately i hate to i hate to get earnest but it really is it's something it was so beautiful it's like how

1:22:27Jason Stewart:it's supposed to be and that just doesn't happen so the only other way that you could maybe top that is nebworth are you gonna go do should i i i i've i'm so torn about it like yes probably

1:22:40Tim Miller:i'm never gonna see i'm never gonna see them again i i was like that was that's as good as it's gonna be yeah i i see both sides of it i know i see both sides but i don't know um but uh i mean like on the one hand i almost went the next night like me and my i got a flight home the next day with me and my girlfriend we were just like we should just we should just do it again we should do it again we should do it again and then like uh it we walked the wrong way out of heaton park or whatever and and you know our backs were hurting by the time that we got home so you know and so we decided not to do it but uh uh yeah i mean i don't know on the one hand never see him again on the other hand i was at the last lcd msg show and i have felt similar mixed feelings when they came back i was like it's never going to be better and then every time i see them they're awesome and so i kind of i don't know yeah i mean i don't think there's i don't think there's any wrong way to go about it.

1:23:27Tim Miller:I just think that it's a dealer's choice situation.

1:23:30Jason Stewart:Okay, last question, Tim. Musically, you're wearing a Hot Boys shirt. What song should I put at the end of this episode to represent Nola? Probably just Juvie, right? Just a little back that ass up or something?

1:23:42Tim Miller:Any Juvie? I don't know. I mean, I need a hot girl if I'm in the Hot Boys shirt. It's probably I need a hot girl. I think that'd be appropriate. I need a hot girl. Alright, classic. Okay, beautiful. Guys, I love you guys. I appreciate this. I'm sorry. I was kind of adding extra questions because after this, I've got to go talk about Marco Rubio or something again. This was a gift for you guys having me. Godspeed. And when I make it to New Orleans, I'm looking you up because I need a tour guide. So I'll see you soon. Dude, absolutely, man. You have to come. All right? I'll see you soon. Or maybe, who's in New York?

1:24:16Which one's in New York? I'm in New York. I'm in New York. You're in New York. Are you going to do geese? If I'm here, yeah, for sure. Okay. Well, message me. Maybe I'll see a geese. Otherwise, come on down to New Orleans. I appreciate you guys. All right, cool. Thanks, Tim. Thanks again. I'll talk to you soon. All right. Later, bro. See you later.

1:24:28Tim Miller:What you got, friend? You need a hot one. I got one. I take it in bed. Break it down. Shake it down. With me and a friend. Bigger than bounce, slide, ride. Shake that thing to the right. Push it up. Push it down. Boom. You're not about to lick it up like ice cream. Whoa, do you know it? She made me...