874. - Chris & Jason

9:09Chris Black:enough they might not remember borat or ali g but one of their girlfriends might be older and be

9:15Jason Stewart:able to tell them about it talladega knights you know he was he was the gay french f1 racer you know that's never that demo found i've never seen that film no but that sounds like a good that

9:26Chris Black:sounds like a slightly later starting point which would be good for him as far as as face card

9:31Jason Stewart:face recognition goes you know face face card is his face card recognition ali g's face card did not decline mama never never um yeah so good for them uh you know come on the pod not you um guy from the office though krasinski you're you're a twat well krasinski i want i want to

9:50Chris Black:preserve him as jim that's that's like that's i've never seen him in anything else like i don't i I don't know. What's he? He's John Wick now, I think.

9:57Jason Stewart:I think that he does movies now where he's sort of like. Big movies. I'm the lone patriot fighter. And he's like, I don't know. Him. I don't know. Everyone gets too hunkified. Like all these guys, once you hit a certain age, they have the midlife crisis. They get their Dax Shepard on. They get the$200 ,000 Ford Bronco Tesla remod. and then suddenly they can't turn around in an elevator because their fucking shoulders and traps are so huge. It's true. It's overkill, but I mean, you know, these are people who were maybe bullied in school as children. I think they were fine. I think they're fine.

10:35Chris Black:I think that it's a money thing. I think you do gym. You're the aw shucks. Like maybe I would see this guy at a pavement show, kind of, you know, guy next door. and then they offer you$50 million to get ripped to be in like three John Wick movies and you're like, fuck it, why not? But it does sort of, you're right, the pressure to get absolutely jacked to make money in Hollywood, once again, the patriarchy is striking and I don't like it at all.

11:03Jason Stewart:I don't know if it's to make money in Hollywood because Krasinski is the only one who's really putting that body to work on camera.

11:11Chris Black:Well, I mean, what's his name, the comedian? That's not funny. did it famously. What's his name? Oh, Kumail. Kumail did it. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, Kumail did it for a movie. I think, well, I'll say this. I think the impetus is always I have a role. After that, whether anybody sees the movie or not. Well, okay, what about Dax? He ain't getting no roles, bro. Dax, but he's on camera every day. And he's got a, and his wife hates him. And he hates his wife. And he's got a co-host that's worse than me. So I feel sorry for, I feel sorry.

11:42Jason Stewart:He's like, I'm sitting on the couch. I'm trying to make Ellie Kemper cry while the stitching on my Buck Mason V-neck is falling out.

11:51Chris Black:Bro, he wishes it was Buck Mason. That motherfucker wears plaid shirts that look like they're from Target. Deadass. He's too rich. He looks like he's buying plaid shirts. There's a certain kind of cheapness to them that I can't pinpoint. And I don't even know where he's. I saw a picture recently of Ashton Kutcher leaving one of those Beverly Hills delis that he was at for lunch. and he was dressed in a way that was so unbelievable. To be that rich and good looking and look that bad is an effort. I know these guys only wear clothes they get for free.

12:23Jason Stewart:You said this is a New York deli? No, LA. It was like a Beverly Hills. I just pulled it up. Ashton Kutcher spotted stepping out of Beverly Glen Deli on Beverly Hills after enjoying a relaxed breakfast. He has a Realtree camo LA Dodgers hat. Check.

12:40Chris Black:that's the best that's the best thing he's got on that's the number one piece of the fit

12:46Jason Stewart:he's got uh he's got a pink hoodie of unknown brand it's a soft kind of pastel pink maybe the type you'd see with the glossier logo on it and then he wishes again he wishes glossier merch nicer than this they're doing a hoodie would be a step up as well step up and then uh a little kind of khaki car hardy chore coat i guess that would be like a but

13:08Chris Black:But again, it's like a chore coat he got from the sales section at Huckberry. It just doesn't make sense.

13:13Jason Stewart:It's one of those chore coats where if you get it for Christmas, you're like, oh, thanks. You almost got there. But Ashton Kutcher has, let's call it$700 million. I don't know.

13:26Chris Black:Savvy tech investor. We don't just know him from film and TV and punked. He's made his fortune.

13:31Jason Stewart:He's got the graphic designer hiking boots and some just plain weird khakis where the tapering on them is all wrong for his thin, long physique.

13:45Chris Black:It's a full crazy, like I know these guys don't care and I respect that, but there's a way to not care in a jeans and a t-shirt like a normal person. Because that starts to, the mix of fabrics here is so flammable that I feel like it's unsafe. Literally and metaphorically. He could drive one of his electric cars because it could combust. It's so crazy what he looks like. That picture somehow shocked me more than most celebrities.

14:11Jason Stewart:Shocked me to the core.

14:12Chris Black:Thank you to our Bat Grid family for providing that. My favorite.

14:16Jason Stewart:B Grid, throw your Bs up. But let's say he's a few years older than we are. We'll call him late 40s, probably, something like that. Yeah, yeah. He's been living in LA for decades. He's been famous. He has millions and millions and millions of dollars. You're a full grown adult man. You're going out to eat in Beverly Hills. Regardless of your status in the world, how much money you got in the bank or how famous you are and how many people are going to want to take a picture with you, just straight up dressing normally to go to a restaurant in Beverly Hills. I didn't even think about the absolute gutter.

14:57Jason Stewart:He's dressed like he's bopping down to the bodega to get his BEC the Aki way or whatever. Like, oh, so hungover. I'm going to get my blue Pedialyte and go home and watch I Love LA, binge it, whatever. But he's getting into his G-Wagon and going to Beverly Hills and dressed like he's in line to get a Plan B in Missouri.

15:18Chris Black:He does look like it. He looks like he's at the CVS trying to get a Plan B in a Flyover City. That's exactly right. But I just don't understand what, like, it seems harder.

15:29Jason Stewart:Let me get two while we're here, actually.

15:30Chris Black:Oh, you sell them legally here? All right, I'll get two. It seems to me that that look, that look, and him and Dax, you know, homies, they have a similar look. It feels like effort is being put in. But I just don't know where, like, is Mila Kunis saying, oh, yeah, that looks good, babe? Is there a stylist? Like, who is encouraging that? It's crazy because he's such a good-looking guy. I mean, he's literally a corn-fed hunk model. That's why he exists. He famously, and I'm sure you mimic this look, he made the Jesus is my homeboy t-shirt a must-have.

16:06Jason Stewart:I almost wore that for the GQ 90s theme moddy, but it was more 2003. It's 2000. Him and Timberlake cleaned up. I mean, Carolyn, when I first met her and went over to her house, she had a poster and it was from, I forgot, it was like from a YSL show that was at like the Hollywood Palladium, like kind of early days, whatever it was, when he was still kind of like a baby face model. And like, he was maybe at the time, maybe the hottest man on earth. Oh, yeah. Oh, absolutely. Like when he was like a 19 year old model, just, you know, 6 '2", buff and just whatever that face was, you know?

16:49Chris Black:No, he's very, that's my problem. That's also my problem. I think when you have what it takes from a genetic standpoint, no Sidney Sweeney, it feels like you should be able to put on the right T-shirt and the right pair of pants and the right shoes. You know what I mean? I'm not asking you to wear a suit or a tuxedo. I understand you're going to a casual lunch with an agent, but I just feel like it feels purposeful is what I'm saying. The way that Taylor Swift dresses bad on purpose, this feels like that in its own different way. this episode of how long gone is brought to you by superpower super power jason you know recently i went to see the old doctor you know and i i left the medical facility in beverly hills and uh i just i felt like i didn't get any good info you know it was sort of like you're fine

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17:42Chris Black:efficient am i even going to be alive in three months because i need real data i want a game plan i don't need a pat on the back i get that all the time my personal life but superpower the

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19:18Chris Black:Hell no.

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19:53Chris Black:But after the age of 30, which unfortunately we are, even responsibly drinking a little booze will make you feel less than 100 % the next day. And look, there are obviously more negative effects from alcohol than just dehydration. Otherwise, how could alcohol be hard on your brain and liver? It has a depressant effect on specific receptors in your brain, and it's toxic to your liver. That's bad, Jason. What can we do? What do you think? Is there a fix for this? Is there a way to sort of hack this?

20:20Jason Stewart:That is bad, Chris. There is a good one. I like to drink. I like to put them down a little bit. Certain alcohols give me certain feelings and headaches and bad feelings. When I drink wine, I won't be feeling so good the next day compared to something else. And that's where I like to grab a little Cheers. They appeared over on Shark Tank. Let's go. And now Cheers is sold in over 30 ,000 stores, Walgreens, CVS, 7-Eleven, all that stuff. Served over 50 million doses. So that's why we reach for Cheers, Chris. You're going to feel at least 50 % better the next day or your money back. Basically, two drinks feels like one the next morning.

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22:58Jason Stewart:Interesting, yeah. I mean, the Taylor Swift. It's crazy. Yeah, you know, the way she was dressing back then. I mean, currently, you're just like, there's no way that this isn't all planned and strategized.

23:09Chris Black:Yeah, I don't think Ashton Kutcher's trying to look relatable to a teenage girl. Is he trying to look relatable to the guys that live in Austin? I don't know what sense. I just don't know who he's dressing for. Hey, man.

23:21Jason Stewart:The Hollywood world is tricky and treacherous. They'll pluck you from obscurity and turn you into a monster.

23:28Chris Black:Well, that's what we forget, I think, is that all of these people are dorks. They're not musicians. They haven't been beasting in the underground and loving counterculture for their entire lives. They're like hotties that played high school football.

23:39Jason Stewart:They hit the genetic lottery. They hit the genetic lottery.

23:43Chris Black:They did. They really did.

23:44Jason Stewart:Lottery. Okay, let's see here. We were talking about Substack earlier. Charlie is a Substack-er. I know. I loved it. I saw you post that. I loved it.

23:53Chris Black:I loved it. People were like, she can't write. I'm like, shut up, dude. This is one of the... I think that's a great example of Substack being the only option out there to distribute something. But I loved it. I thought it was great. I thought it was fun to read. I thought it was straightforward. I don't know.

24:08Jason Stewart:yeah i like that she didn't charge for it yeah i mean i i've i always like in a time where it's very very rare to see when i mean i i always love it and i hope if it happens to me one day i will i will do that but when people get famous and then talk about it because it's entertaining to everyone else yeah you know and i guess like comedians kind of do it because they're a little more like open and like less to lose and just whatever but where you're when celebrities and famous people who are doing amazing interesting things talk about it because they know everyone wants to hear about it and it's super entertaining and it's like wow that's crazy tell me these crazy stories about when you're on this private jet and then this happened and blah blah blah and then versus so many other celebs are just like i'm just like so stupid i'm like i don't even know two plus two and i just man magically got this job and i'm so lucky and i really don't deserve you know like tell me some fucking crazy shit bro talk about it be open about it you can't i

25:10Chris Black:mean it's a different i think that she has been able to cultivate a relationship with her fans that will allow for that and most people haven't like if ariana grande did that it would ruin her career you know what i mean if ariana grande was like cynthia rivio is actually a bitch like fuck this shit i'm doing wicked for the bread like it wouldn't fly in the same way you know it just Get them some bread over there on the set at Wicked, huh? No gluten-free either. Has there ever been anything less cool than Wicked? I cannot wrap my head. I hate it so much. I hate hearing it. I wish I didn't know anything about it.

25:40Chris Black:What's the straight equivalent of Wicked, do you think? NFL Red Zone package? I don't even know. I have no idea what this is. Big Bang Theory? Big Bang Theory is straight, but it doesn't. Yeah, maybe. Honestly, something like that that is sort of just part of culture. without you never noticed it or you never thought about it but you know everything about it because you've been forced to learn by having eyes you know i'm gonna look it up right now see what good old chat gpt has to say them them pretending to like each other is their best acting job that's the best that's the best acting they're ever gonna do it's not even that believable but it's it's the

26:16Jason Stewart:best okay look bro i said i asked chat gpt what is the equivalent of the broadway play wicked but for straight people and it says hamilton yeah yeah okay a massive universally appealing blockbuster musical a cultural juggernaut bada bing bada bing yeah because because like lion king isn't dorky

26:35Chris Black:it's just lion king you know dude i always i gotta forget about hamilton what an awful blemish in our culture what a fucking crazy like we should never have made him giving lin well manuel miranda fame and money is one of the biggest mistakes we've made. That's up there with electing Trump for me.

26:52Jason Stewart:And I would get mad because he would appear on Curb Your Enthusiasm. Everywhere. Because he would infiltrate into our nation's great minds and endear himself to them somehow. It was like some type of little scam that you would fall for quietly and not talk about it.

27:13Chris Black:I will give him credit, though. He seems to have sort of disappeared. or at least he made his money and knew maybe that he had oversaturated the marketplace smart most

27:23Jason Stewart:people don't know how to do that yeah so good job charlie thank you for writing that we need more stacking like that you want to talk about the 100 grams of protein bowl at sweet cream a lot of people were like you're talking about this on the podcast if you don't what is your podcast even

27:43Chris Black:mean you know i don't i didn't read the gq story but i love the guy the the guy just being like i ate the sweet green 100 gram protein bowl and regretted it even like he was just he looked sick from the after picture i mean is some people can't handle 100 grams of protein in one sitting

27:59Jason Stewart:especially if you're a guy in a cubicle all day it's more of a power lifters meal right well that

28:07Chris Black:that was the that was the question i was going to ask you i don't know anything about gram the only grams I know about hey aren't protein um but I don't I don't really understand like obviously based on the response 100 grams is extreme an extreme amount that that is not but when I'm watching all these buff guys eat their fucking ground beef and cottage cheese and shit like is 100 grams light or is 100 grams you know I'm saying 100 grams light for a real one or you know know where it falls.

28:39Jason Stewart:I think 100 grams in one meal is a lot. It's excessive. And I think it's the type of thing where only certain people who need that much fuel for their fire should be consuming.

28:53Chris Black:Sure. And like you said, most people that work at KPMG don't need that. This is for professional athletes, basically, is what it sounds like.

29:03Jason Stewart:Either that or you're a large person or you require a lot of fuel because of your job, whatever it might be, and not necessarily a CrossFit instructor.

29:14Chris Black:Yeah, you know those construction workers are hitting sweet green for the$30 100-gram protein bowl.

29:21Jason Stewart:You've got to have something to wash down the 7-Eleven breakfast pizza.

29:24Chris Black:What is the – okay, so what's in it? Is it all chicken? Is there a mix? Let's see here. I'm not sure. I haven't looked at it. I've tried to avoid it because it kind of grosses me out. Right, that much protein. pause right just just the idea of i just think that eating like that as we said in one of our chats like eating like that is just so depressing to me and the fact that it's become like quote unquote cool because it's like another trend on instagram is just it's it's just gross yeah i

29:53Jason Stewart:agree i mean it is a little excessive and i think you know for the people say you're supposed to have for every pound of weight you have on your body you should be eating that gram equivalent of protein.

30:05Chris Black:Sure. So in this case, okay, so in theory, a 200-pound man, you have to eat two of these. You should be having,

30:13Jason Stewart:you have to eat two of these. But, you know, spread out, that's spread out through the entire day. That's breakfast, lunch, dinner, whatever. And that's you really cramming that stuff in because your body is really, of course, you know, expelling so much energy. But what, okay, what's in the bowl? I'm trying to freaking find it. I can't find it.

30:33Chris Black:I'm going to look at the GQ story from Tyler Chin here. Hold on. I love this quote. It's so good. However familiar, the parts of this concoction, its sum was still impressive. At the risk of being obvious, 106 grams of protein is a lot of fucking protein.

30:49Jason Stewart:Yeah.

30:50Chris Black:Let's see. All right. I learned the PowerMax Protein Bowl includes four portions of roasted chicken, two portions of quinoa, two portions of spicy broccoli, and two portions of green goddess ranch. Got it. Okay. So basically, they just remixed it. They took ingredients they already had on hand and made it protein-maxing.

31:06Jason Stewart:Yes. And I think that – I mean, I'm sure it was because a lot of, you know, workout people who need a lot of protein for the crazy workout they just did are going in there and saying, let me get, you know, four servings of chicken the same way they'll do it at Chipotle or wherever else, you know. I wonder if – Broccoli is, you know, it's a great, healthy, nutritious fiber. Quinoa. Quinoa tastes – Quinoa is up there with matcha as far as tasting, like,

31:32Chris Black:dirt but i i i understand it it has a place in the world are afraid of rice nowadays people are still afraid of rice i just find i i but i think that the chipotle thing and i've never experienced it but it seems like it's sort of the whole the reason why that is popular is because it's been sort of gamified online it's not on the actual menu right like people just go in there and order

31:54Jason Stewart:like that so it became like a trend i think so i think so yeah which seems like a smarter approach

31:58Chris Black:than marketing this because now sweet greens only get killed for this because it's gross

32:03Jason Stewart:maybe yes maybe no i mean it the the problem i feel like the main issue that i see with it is the same reason the same thing that happens with every like fast casual or fast food restaurant where you know the the plating and the imagery in the marketing materials varies wildly from the actual product that you receive you know like when people do like here's what i got at mcdonald's and here's the ad that sold me on it and one of them looks like it's been run over by a car and one of them looks mouth-watering and delicious when you make the food look really that mouth-watering and delicious and perfect in on your marketing images and then you get that viral thing that you're selling to go viral and you realize it's not very photogenic or video friendly but that's every that's

32:55Chris Black:every fast that's i mean you know you go to wendy's it ain't looking like that either i know

32:59Jason Stewart:like i was saying it's it's every fast food restaurant and fast casual restaurant because you know it's just the when when you're that big you know what what actually is going to come out it's it's impossible to have control over yeah definitely every single thing you know chef doesn't get to wipe the wipe the plate with his little towel for every every kale season that goes flying out off the robotic line.

33:23Chris Black:I guess as a person who spent a lot of time in Sweetgreen in New York City, I ain't ever seen a surplus of guys that look like they need 106 grams of protein at lunch. I would say it leans a little more feminine and maybe just a little smaller in general body size. But I'm only, obviously, my sample set is only from one location, so who am I to say? Maybe Midtown's a totally different ballgame.

33:48Jason Stewart:Totally different ballgame, Chris. Go to the Sweet Greens I'm hanging out in. It's a good-looking, attractive man who are really heavy. Big guys. Not heavy from fat. Muscle actually weighs more than fat.

33:59Chris Black:Did you know that? Huge guys. Huge guys. We should talk about big Don linking up with Maybach Zoe. Donald Trump and Zoran Mamdani. Yeah, they had a nice little link. I think it's cool that -

34:15Jason Stewart:They had a key in the oval?

34:16Chris Black:That Trump folded like a napkin.

34:19Jason Stewart:Right.

34:19Chris Black:Do you think, because I've seen so many people talking about it and why they think he did this, and I don't know if I have a theory or an answer or if he just likes winners. That's the best. Like why Trump invited him or why Mom Donnie agreed to go? I'm saying why he sort of made it. No, he has to invite him and Mom Donnie has to go. Both of those things are true. But I'm saying why do you think it was so friendly and not contentious? And do you think that was something Trump was advised on? or do you think he just straight up likes winners and doesn't give a fuck and is happy to like right like is it better for him to be nice to him i don't i don't really understand the the reasoning

34:57Jason Stewart:yeah i mean there there could be a few different options there could be you know he really believes that this guy is oozing riz and charm and he was legitimately wooed and won over by zoran because he's you know he's an enigmatic personality perfect politician and that's just what he does he was even easily able to take down donald trump there's some of that you know my brain went to not so much did trump's team or the powers that be advise him to make this copacetic but more so the the drugs that he is given at certain times of the day in certain dosages maybe they gave him the you know they sprinkled a little bit of molly water or a little toosie or something in there just to make his mood a little more jovial and agreeable and just kind of like hey it's all good man i know i do i have a cigarette no your friend can have a cigarette too like that

35:56Chris Black:kind of i wonder i mean it feels because i know that don is getting murdered on like you know

36:03Jason Stewart:cost of living yeah and that's that's that's the third yeah the third thing is like is my sinking ship gonna be able to float a few more months if i if i tie yeah my buoy to this guy's boat because he's zooming right now all the way down to venezuela those two hamming it up though is is

36:20Chris Black:really funny and i love it i love that jd vance had a stomach bug he said and not even he said he might have a stomach that's the literal quote i might have a stomach bug to avoid meeting i might have to wash my hair that that is so fucking funny to say i might have a stomach bug it's so good

36:39Jason Stewart:i mean that's it's it's good to have these reminders that our our government is run by people with you know middle school level social skills so far all of it strategies all of it is

36:50Chris Black:so funny and and i guess i think to some people it's not surprising to other people it was just a great it was a great moment of everybody sort of being surprised well in in a way who do you

37:01Jason Stewart:think it's it's hurting more do you think the the maga trumpers are more upset or do you think all the the libtards are more upset that he's hobnobbing with their enemy i think that they don't

37:13Chris Black:love that jimmy kimmel and his wife don't love that but they also know that it's it's the president like what the fuck you're gonna do like it you have to you know what i mean that's sort of like i don't know how you avoid building with the president if you're the mayor of the most important city in the world and you are trying to get things done yeah like obviously you're not going to see eye to eye but part of being a politician is that and we've forgotten this in the last whatever 10 years but it's politicking yeah they're literally politicking but i don't

37:42Jason Stewart:yo what's your math don yeah well okay so so you you think it's it's more damaging to trump

37:48Chris Black:than to to maybagzo i think yes i think the real like trump lovers are like what the fuck is he

37:56Jason Stewart:doing talking to this illegal is the vibes do you think that trump knows that that's going to happen this illegal do you think trump knows that's going to happen because and he's doing it as a smoke screen to have people talking about anything but the epstein files epstein's already over i

38:12Chris Black:think i think people besides people he's he's putting his head on a stake i think he's i think it's one of his heads one yeah i don't i don't think it's a distraction i think it's like something that had to happen and he on he handled it this is this is the right i don't know if he was advised on this but this was the right thing to do like you can't have him come to the white house after he just had that level of victory and you've seen the way people love him and then you make fun of him to his face and mondani knew the same too he knew the same like i'm not going to come in here and be like yo your hands are fat and you got bruises and your hair looks like shit like you know what i mean they both they both sort of they're they're both successful politicians

38:50Jason Stewart:because they both knew they have to show up for this and this is going to happen. This is part of the game. Honestly, yes. And that's why J.D. Vance is not a real politician because he said,

38:59Chris Black:ooh, I might have a stomach bug that day. I had something weird last night.

39:02Jason Stewart:That's why he was mean-girling.

39:03Chris Black:Yeah, he said, I think that...

39:04Jason Stewart:Well, do you think that if Zohran, if Biryani Mamdani was the president, roles are reversed. If he was president and Donald was just running New York City, not all of Saudi Arabia, I mean, the other way around, only the mayor of New York would Don refuse to go tap in at the Oval Office or would he even him I think

39:33Chris Black:everybody knows the president is the president and you sort of, if you get the invite to the White House you ain't hurting anybody but yourself if you don't go

39:40Jason Stewart:I will push back on that the Philadelphia Eagles my Eagles, go Eagles after they won the Super Bowl in 2018 they did not go visit the white house with trump golden state warriors 2017 old steps they're not politicians true but i mean i'm saying people people will refuse to go these are all people

40:01Chris Black:i don't think politicians are in a position to refuse to go if you're trying to get something done it's the president united states a football player with nothing to lose yeah like who gives a fuck i don't get like that tradition is stupid like who gives a fuck like why i wouldn't want to do that anyway okay whoever the president is i think if you're impressed with meeting the

40:17Jason Stewart:president you got problems yeah so so when tom brady has when tom brady thinks he has a stomach

40:23Chris Black:bug it's less impactful i just don't yeah i mean it's just like athletes aren't smart i don't care what they do out i don't care what they do at all of them i don't care what they do at all but i definitely don't care what they do when they're not on the field of the court damn i got a good

40:36Jason Stewart:quote larry bird after he won i don't know what year but reagan was in office nba star larry bird declined an invitation to visit Ronald Reagan saying, if the president wants to see me, he knows where to find me.

40:49Chris Black:Okay, that is very cool. Let that white boy cook. Larry Bird sent that to his publicist after he had 14 Coors Lights too. So that's coming from a good place. I wanted to talk about that.

41:00Jason Stewart:He said that right after he punched another mirror.

41:03Chris Black:I want to.

41:07Chris Black:Larry, no one hated Larry more than Larry hated himself. I want to talk about this Marty Supreme merch infection that's going on. So we've talked about Timmy's sort of generational press run that he's been on. He's kind of, I mean, he's done everything. He's done it, I would say, almost perfectly. Topping it all off with the Drewski could have been records auditions, which is the coolest thing anyone could do but the merch and selling the merch to the dorks that would buy it feels feels like a rare misstep in the in the timmy verse right and i i do you feel do you feel the same because to me obviously kid cuddy wearing it is not cool but tom brady wearing it is funny and cool but as soon as you see it on the streets of bushwick to me it just it makes

42:05Jason Stewart:the movie feel less cool yeah it makes me want i want that to happen after i've seen the movie not before i think that's the differential kind of thing because back in our own ass era a movie would come out and then it would hit and then everyone would start dressing that as that and doing the halloween costume and quoting in blah blah blah we you know we didn't know so much about a film before it came out you watch the trailer in the movie theater or on tv and you say that looks good i want to see it the the the lead up and the rollout and the amount of work that has to be done to get a movie just out of the red the whole thing is is fucked out and all the juices have been squeezed out of the i mean the whole property before it even plays no i so that's that

42:50Chris Black:part i mean like there's just more places to do press you know what i mean obviously like you got to go do fucking hot ones and subway takes and now new york times cooking has the fake tiny desk

43:01Jason Stewart:Yeah, well, I mean, long story short, you have to ruin a film just to have it be a financial success.

43:08Chris Black:But do you have to sell something? That's the question. Selling yourself and trying to sell what you're promoting is a classic. That's how the world works. This new edition of making money is different because it didn't exist before, really. Definitely not the way it does now.

43:25Jason Stewart:Well, you mentioned, does it make the movie less cool when you see somebody walking around in Bushwick or whatever with that merch? Is it more excusable when you see them walking around in Oklahoma City or Portland, Oregon or a more tertiary market where you're like, oh, this makes sense?

43:41Chris Black:Well, I don't think they could get it. I don't think they sold it online. I think it was only in New York. That's the other thing. Yes, it would in theory. I mean, I just don't think that, I don't know. For me, obviously, you know, I don't need to be a part of a movie subculture. like I don't think that's cool like I don't it just doesn't resonate with me at all but I thought that when he when he was wearing it and it was like what's going on like we talked about here I thought it might actually be supreme yeah because that's how popular he is at this point and it looks like something that supreme would make and it's so cool and then you come to find out it's you know it's not that and then I saw a guy on the street literally in Brooklyn wearing it with a little fucking you know with a little mullet and and his car hearts on and I was like Jesus Christ like this just went for the most anticipated film it still is of course but I

44:28Jason Stewart:just don't know if I don't know I just feel like I'll still go see it but I will be less excited about seeing it and I might be a little more you know I might have the hoodie up as I'm walking out of the theater I might be a little more embarrassed when I saw Tom Brady post on

44:43Chris Black:Instagram I was like this is so funny and cool Tom Brady wearing it like that's so weird and stupid like that's really funny but as soon as you see as soon as there's a lineup for it and it's like people that are just thirst i don't know it just doesn't feel it doesn't feel like the right thing to do you know you could just put it online after the movie comes out and you still would have made the same amount of money if not you know 10 times more because it was a wider

45:06Jason Stewart:audience i think it's the power of timmy i think he's he knows how to get this stuff done and And unfortunately, some of it is not cool and it's dorky. And then the gatekeepers have been like, cool, we've been losing billions of dollars every year for the last few years. Might as well put a dent in it. Let's let this fucking kid's ideas, let her rip, see what this guy's got. And the problem is it's working. He's just saying like, oh, why don't you just do it this way instead? And they're like, oh, well, I couldn't sleep at night if I did that. And he's like, whatever, who cares? And the rest of the world is like, yeah, whatever, who cares?

45:41Jason Stewart:And he's right.

45:41Chris Black:I mean, that's the problem.

45:42Jason Stewart:He's definitely right. He's totally right. He's totally right. But then the problem is, Timmy, as long as he stays a good-hearted young man, everything will be fine. But if he realizes his power and he sort of doesn't need MGM and Paramount and Warner Brothers or A24 or anything, he can just say, like, hey, Tom Brady, give me$100 million. I have a dope idea for this movie. And he's like, all right, bet. Let's do it. Run it up. And he's like, I'll promote the whole thing and it'll be guaranteed. And everyone's like, cool, great. And now, why do I need a movie studio?

46:13Chris Black:I mean, making movies is a lot of fucking work. It's the same way people are like, I want to be on a major because they do it.

46:19Jason Stewart:Would you rather get paid by Timothee Chalamet or, you know, Jeff Bezos?

46:24Chris Black:Well, this is what I've talked about musicians. They're like, I'm going to have to pay somebody to do the work. So I'd rather the record label handle it than me have to deal with it every day. You know what I'm saying? Like somebody, like it's not like I can't. Hey, hire an accountant. I mean, sure. I just don't think, I think that is an extreme example. but I also think that I think that Timmy will I mean eventually the something is gonna gotta give like you can't have hit after hit nobody does you know this is not this will be a hit this will be definitely be a hit I have no I have no question

46:52Jason Stewart:it'll be it'll be a hit if his SD kid rapping career takes off it might hurt his screenplay green light green lighting

47:02Chris Black:and things like that I also wanted to talk to you about your buddy Donald Glover um musician actor loser he um he played I saw somebody call flognaw flognaw n-a-w which is pretty funny yesterday um and I guess he had had some health issues and that's why he had been like you know whatever there's he hadn't polluted the world with any more childers Gambino but he made some canceled trading cards for the merch stand. It's Diddy R. Kelly and Target, but then Drake is also featured. I thought Drake was... Now I know why you've got a little extra venom for my man Gambino. I've always hated Donald Glover.

47:50Chris Black:That's on record. I think that Drake obviously is out of favor after losing the battle to Kendrick Lamar. There's no question there. but I don't think he belongs in the rankings with Diddy and R. Kelly and Target for Christ's sake.

48:05Jason Stewart:I love your Victorian logic. I'm not cancelled. I'm simply out of favor.

48:09Chris Black:I don't understand. I mean doesn't that feel a little extreme? Does it feel like I mean he's had a hundred. It's a shot. He's taking a shot. Donald Glover can't take a shot at anybody. Come on bro. He just did. What's Drake going to do about it? He's shooting blanks. I mean Donald Glover is one of the least cool people to ever exist in the Hollywood canon. and people say the same thing about Drake but Donald Glover's had a couple songs that people like and Drake's had a hundred I just don't think, I don't understand why you would classify him with people that are in jail that's all I'm saying you could say he sucks but I don't know if he belongs in the same arena

48:46Jason Stewart:okay well don't come from my Kells okay, he's a real singer not like your little Aubrey but you know I think that when we're attacking other people, when we're creating these quote unquote beefs that may or may not be real or fake or fabricated. We don't know anything about that. That's something I was thinking about recently. We need to do more open podcast beefs because that's what every other industry is doing to move their needles.

49:15Chris Black:How much time do you have? I can explain to you that Akash Singh is being cucked by his wife from Flagrant 2, but I don't know if our listeners want to hear about that.

49:23Jason Stewart:I don't know any of those words. Those words are not in the Bible.

49:26Chris Black:It's cool. I'll send you a link. It's a pretty funny thing. But I agree. Every other industry does benefit from this.

49:34Jason Stewart:So if he's having a harmless beef with somebody, first of all, he's punching up, which is why it's, trust me, at the top, it isn't lonely. Drake is at the top still. So if you're going to send shots to somebody, that's punching upwards, not punching down. So most people are going to be okay with it. if he's coming for a young broke rapper, people are going to be like, that's not cool, Donald Glover. You have millions of dollars. So there's that part. And then also, he made$80 ,000 selling Drake is a canceled playing cards at a music festival at Dodger Stadium. Hey, totally. That's funny. No, I think it's funny.

50:13Jason Stewart:I mean, and I'm not defending. I'm only playing childish advocate just for the sake of good podcasting.

50:20Chris Black:I think he's trying to say that Drake is a childish advocate, and that's the problem. Chill, chill, chill, chill, chill. What a kid's out. But it is funny. No, of course it's funny. It's hilarious. Wagwan with the children. That's what he says down on St. Marks. It's hilarious. It's very, very funny. But I was just like, this guy, who's buying that? Do you know what I mean? It's definitely funny, but I don't know if he made$80 ,000.

50:40Jason Stewart:A lot of people are going to buy that. A lot of people. I don't know.

50:44Chris Black:I think they'd buy a, sadly, they'd rather wear a Charles Gambino hoodie so people can see it than keep their canceled cards in their notebooks. Look, I'm just talking about merch markups. Canceled cards. It's funny. It's funny. It's really fucking funny. I have to give him credit on that.

50:58Jason Stewart:And he said that he had a heart attack or a stroke. Seizure. Oh, no, he had a stroke. Yes, you're right. It was a stroke. He had a stroke. He went to the hospital, and they're like, yeah, Batman, you had a stroke kind of thing, which is, you know, I hope if I ever have one, it'll be one of those things where you find out afterwards and not where you have to go to the ambulance.

51:16Chris Black:I mean, he's very young for a stroke, but I guess when you're making - when you're under that much pressure things will come for you a little quicker

51:25Jason Stewart:he had a quote that said until you see your second life you don't realize that you only have one

51:36Chris Black:I'm sad

51:38Jason Stewart:it's a very Gambino thing to say

51:40Chris Black:I'm sad that that happened to him because it's scary but he's still somehow the corny he can even make that sound corny and not harrowing which is a skill in itself in itself I went to see Geese at Brooklyn Paramount which I hadn't been to Brooklyn Paramount it is very fucking nice I go to Brooklyn Paramount it looked like I saw some photos big ass room they did two nights, I went to night two yes it's big and I was upstairs with a bunch of friends of the show were in the building

52:13Jason Stewart:was the balcony powered by any brands or was it just regular old VIP

52:17Chris Black:I think it was just regular I didn't see any signage. Good. Well, first of all, Willie, who manages Geese and Cameron, his dad, he introduced me to his dad. There wasn't like an airmail lounge up there or anything like that? I don't think. Not at the Geese show. Willie introduced me to his dad and his dad, who's like a full-grown adult man, I think lives in New York City, was like, wait, Chris Black from how long gone? And I was like, yeah, man. And he goes, oh, yeah, I really like the episodes and you guys have a guest. Wow. What the fuck? That's some shots, bro. And Willie was like, Dad, you're out of fucking pocket.

52:51Chris Black:It was so funny. It was so funny because the dad definitely thought he was being really nice. He did not understand. It was so funny. I really appreciate it.

52:59Jason Stewart:Okay, so did you catch his name? I don't remember.

53:02Chris Black:I don't know. I did not catch his name.

53:05Jason Stewart:Daddy, if you're listening right now, you're the first person who's ever said that. Usually people say... That's what I told him. Usually the real fans are like, we love it, the one-on-one episodes more, so you don't need to be talking to another. bitch-ass writer about another bitch-ass book. And this guy's like, hey, you guys kind of suck. The little first 15 where you guys talk about your little collagen powders in Barry's Boot Camp. That shit's stupid. When you talk to Liz Fair about what her kids had for dinner.

53:34Chris Black:That's what I want. Let's go. The good stuff. So I'm standing at... Hey, man. Geese starts playing. And I'm standing there. Kenny Beats, Kenny Bloom. Producer of the Geese record. Producer of the Geese album.

53:47Jason Stewart:It's basically like you're hanging out with Suge Knight at the Chronic Tour of 2001.

53:53Chris Black:Yeah, exactly. Thank you. Thank you for making it sound as cool as it is. It's an audio podcast.

53:56Jason Stewart:Got to get visual with it.

53:58Chris Black:All right. So I'm with Kenny, and we haven't seen each other in a while, so we're just chopping it up, talking. You know what I mean? And we're kind of standing a little bit behind everyone who's really locked in.

54:09Jason Stewart:So is this while the band is playing in between songs?

54:12Chris Black:No, this is while the band is playing. Okay. This is while the band is playing. And Kenny and I are catching up and a gentleman standing next to me. And let me describe him for you. He, of course, had a mullet, a little mullet. And he was wearing a chore coat that probably was like of an Urban Outfitters level. And then I think this says it all, Jason. He had a canned IPA in the pocket of his chore coat open. So he didn't have to hold it. So he placed the beer into his pocket as sort of a holding, instead of having to use his hands.

54:48Jason Stewart:Very geese show coded behavior.

54:50Chris Black:Very geese show. So he leaned over to me and said, hey man, could you guys be quiet? I really like this band and I've been looking forward to this show for a long time. And I was so taken aback that I didn't even, I didn't have time to be like, shut up, bitch. You know what I mean? I didn't have time to say anything. And then I realized that if I would have been alone or with someone else, I just, I'm very glad I was with Kenny. I didn't embarrass him as, as since he is, since he is part, since he is the architect, I did, I would, it would have been bad if I called this guy a name or told him to get the fuck out of my face.

55:28Chris Black:Like I normally would have.

55:29Jason Stewart:So you're, so we're taking this as a win. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Chris successfully knew how to act in this situation.

55:36Chris Black:And you're proud of yourself. I wouldn't, I'm more disappointed in the guy. for not understanding that you cannot say that to someone at a loud ass. This is a band playing on a giant stage. You know what I mean? We're not the symphony. This isn't the ballad.

55:54Jason Stewart:They're howling. They're screaming. We got bombs in the car.

55:57Chris Black:Everyone's yelling. People are moshing. You know what I mean? Half the crowd is on cocaine. This isn't the right environment to shush someone. And I was just kind of stunned.

56:05Jason Stewart:Okay, so you and Kenny Beats, couple of tall guys so are you able to go lean into the ear and tell things? We were doing that.

56:17Chris Black:We weren't just screaming into the void.

56:20Jason Stewart:Yeah, because you are not a concert yeller. No. I don't think Kenny is unless he's gone off the hen. No.

56:27Chris Black:Maybe at the Rico Nasty show the behavior is different, but at the Geese show... A little bit different. He knows how to...

56:31Jason Stewart:So you guys are leaning in, talking directly into someone's ear while a very loud band is playing on a huge sound system.

56:40Chris Black:Yes, and I would never want to disrespect someone playing. I do think that's rude, and I wouldn't want to do that. But I think this guy was bitch-made and felt like he – like, hey, bro, if you want to have the private geese concert, get your money up. This ain't where you're at, bro. If you want to get the invite to the Chase Sapphire private geese show where they covered Leonard Cohen or whatever, you better – but he was in VIP, but I guess he wasn't VVVIP. so i was a little i didn't i didn't know what i just feel like like i don't ever when when and you don't either when someone's you know watching tiktok without headphones on a fucking airplane or a train you don't say anything because you don't want to get into a fight right you you recognize it but you don't say anything because it's like who knows what's going to happen i'm going to get hit in the head with a ds2 you know and this guy behaving like somebody who hasn't been really checked before exactly the confidence this guy had with because he's from new hampshire To stop talking when a fucking loud band is playing is, I've just, that audacity, I would never do that under any circumstance.

57:41Chris Black:I would simply scoot over because everyone gets to have their own experience at the show. It's like, it doesn't, you know what I mean? It's just like you can't police that kind of behavior at a venue with 3 ,000 people in it.

57:53Jason Stewart:Yeah, there's two modes. You either take the high road and say, you know what? These guys are annoying me. Yeah. I've really been looking forward to this geese show and I got a, you know, blah, blah, blah. And I'm going to enjoy it. I'm going to walk 10 feet in any direction and get away from them. And I will never have to think about these two people ever again. The other option is you have to confront them in a offensive way. You have to say, can you guys shut the fuck up? I'm trying to watch this show. Like you can't just say like, hey, guys. You can't hit me with the soft boy therapy speak.

58:31Chris Black:There's nothing in the middle.

58:32Jason Stewart:It has to be like, I am ready. I'm so upset about this that if it comes to it, I'm okay with fighting. Or I'm just going to walk away because this person is annoying the shit out of me. It could be two guys talking. It could be a drunk guy puking versus just like, what the fuck are you doing, bro?

58:49Chris Black:You just walk away. If he would have said that, I would have been like, all right. You're right. If he's like, hey, Big Bird, shut the fuck up, I'd be like, all right. Guys, can we shut up? I'm trying to watch this show.

59:01Jason Stewart:If you say it like that, you're like, all right, respect.

59:04Chris Black:It was just very interesting. It really put me off.

59:07Jason Stewart:But I think young people, oftentimes, social situations, because of whatever reasons that they've been brought up with and everything that they've consumed and been learned and taught and all that stuff, there's just certain practices like that that are if we don't talk about them are going to be lost just just like how they we have to

59:30Chris Black:preserve the recipes of our ancient forefathers we have to preserve the recipes of social behavior

59:36Jason Stewart:yeah yeah yeah yeah because it's like hey guys you don't this is we we figured out how to do this like thousands of years ago here's how you do it works every time and then people are like but that runs the risk of being offensive and then everyone's like yeah who cares yeah if he said this

59:50Chris Black:to like a drunk fucking barista. Best case scenario was saying it to me and Kenny. Honestly, best case scenario.

59:57Jason Stewart:I mean, I would have just been giggling the whole time. That would have been me.

1:00:01Chris Black:I did. Well, Kenny was like, oh, I thought that was your homeboy. And I was like, I would never hang out with somebody who would say something like that, first and foremost. He was like, I literally thought that guy was your friend and was saying that to you because you knew each other. And I was like, you wish. You would hope that that would be the only reason to talk like that as a stranger.

1:00:18Jason Stewart:And now I'm thinking, I'm wondering, if there has been a situation where I had a can of beer in my jacket pocket like that. I'm sure it's happened before.

1:00:27Chris Black:Maybe if you're apple picking upstate, your hands are full.

1:00:31Jason Stewart:I was thinking a little more Godspeed, you black emperor show, but we can do apple picking.

1:00:37Chris Black:Well, those are two sides of the same coin. The guy that was at the Godspeed, you black emperor show with a beer in his jacket is the same guy now that's going apple picking with the beer in his jacket. That's the thing.

1:00:46Jason Stewart:You move from maple syrup to apple cider.

1:00:49Chris Black:Oh, damn.

1:00:50Jason Stewart:damn really makes you think it was a it was a quebecois to a uh upstate new york pipe we gotta tap the rockies we gotta tap the rockies um couple other things you you mentioned jimmy kimmel earlier um his his wife and bill maher got a little tiff going on see this is this is part of the beef that i was talking about moving the needle i mean so basically kimmel or um uh bill Lamar was calling her out for...

1:01:20Chris Black:Yeah, because she's on her like disown all family members that disagree with you politically.

1:01:27Jason Stewart:She said it ain't nothing to cut a family member off if they're full MAGA because we're clearly in a fight against Donald Trump who's trying to cancel my family's show. I mean... Which I think is a fine thing to defend and stand up for. But then I read more and she gave these certain family members like a 10 question ultimatum document and basically like, you know, if you did not pass this quiz or whatever, adios kind of thing.

1:02:01Chris Black:How do we get to a point where you can't like have a holiday meal with someone you don't agree with for an hour and a half? Fox News, I guess. No, totally. And I'm sure that her family members are awful. Red Scare? Just kidding. I also just don't talk to them then. Why does it have to be like a thing? Like if you don't want to talk to somebody, don't talk to them. You don't have to make it like.

1:02:22Jason Stewart:So we're saying don't break up with your racist cousin. Just ghost them.

1:02:29Chris Black:Yeah. You don't have to. Like if somebody is that far down the rabbit hole, they ain't trying to hear from you anyway. They don't care what you have to say about it. Their mind isn't going to be changed, which is fine. That's what I was thinking.

1:02:38Jason Stewart:If you really are an anti-lib MAGA person, you should be stoked to not have to go. The only factor is I'm poor and they're rich, so every time we go over to their house, we're living large.

1:02:54Chris Black:Imagine living in a trailer park in Missouri and your fucking cousin who's got half a billion dollars and lives in Beverly Hills and husband is famous is sending you a fucking Google Doc questionnaire about your beliefs so she can decide whether she cuts you off or not. It's pretty crazy when you think about it that way.

1:03:11Jason Stewart:You know what would be cool? She sends you, it's your boarding pass. It's the QR code for your Delta One flight from Missouri International to LAX. But first, there's a little CAPTCHA. Yes, no, I'm not a robot. Just answer this a quick Google form, just 10 questions. Dude, that's so funny. If you answer it correctly, your boarding pass will be revealed.

1:03:33Chris Black:We did rent the house in Cabo again for the holidays. Here's your ticket. Just click on this link, and if you answer a few questions, we can make sure to get you signed up. The chef is coming back. It's going to be super fun. It's going to be super fun.

1:03:47Jason Stewart:It's in the realm of an NDA where you're like, hey, I'm going to invite you to Thanksgiving. Just initial here, initial here, sign here that you will not mention politics, January 6th, Pizzagate, blah, blah, blah. if so you understand and agree by signing here that you will be asked to leave you know what i mean that that's not that i kind of like the idea of that almost i mean it's funny the whole

1:04:12Chris Black:thing is funny but it's just like it's just so self-serious and like not it's just it seems like you have to understand the point of privilege that you have to cut off family you know it just seems crazy to me to be that rich and that's what you're worried about and that's what you're about what what is family in 2025 you know what i mean but who cares if i have that much money i'm dodging taxes i don't give a fuck what my cousins are doing i'm fucking taking up residence in dallas and nashville so i don't have to fucking like what are you worried about i'm saying if

1:04:41Jason Stewart:if you know for since the dawn of man family has been very important because that is your core group and your people but now because of the worldwide web and social media yeah we all have our chosen families and people all over the world that we've become real family members with so if if a chunk of your blood literal family is like very racist and are awful people or just you just don't like them for whatever reason and they don't like you great cut them off yeah you're on the

1:05:13Chris Black:you're on the private plane with jennifer aniston going to the beach like you don't need to worry about your cut like you're not changing their mind they're not changing your mind let's just walk away it's all good it's all good it doesn't need to be any more than that like and also if i'm

1:05:26Jason Stewart:if I'm a manga bro just because your cousin fucked my sister doesn't mean I'm gonna ride or die for you I don't really think Jimmy Kimmel's that funny no he no definitely not I I don't think that he was he was good on the man show he used to be good and he lost weight and you know I don't know it

1:05:42Chris Black:just didn't work it doesn't work the same he can't deliver the jokes the same yeah kept employing that chef who was on Epstein's plane 7 ,000 times oh I forgot about that yeah you're a great pit master your hands ain't clean your hands ain't clean jimmy uh even even though you're using the nicest soap over over there in brentwood covered in some of those beef rib sauce how long gone thank you guys for listening uh happy thanksgiving to those who celebrate and uh we'll be back this week with with a few podcasts um to keep you occupied when you're with your mega family

1:06:12Jason Stewart:members i'm gonna i'm gonna eat a a sweet green protein bowl i'm gonna show you how to do it all in one sitting, not like a little bitch.

1:06:20Chris Black:Yeah, you can't take that shit back to the office refrigerator. You got to finish that shit in one sitting like a man.

1:06:25Jason Stewart:Show you how it's done. And then lastly, one quick question fashion-wise. Is there anything that you can do to de-itch a sweater? Not to go menswear guy on you, but I just got a great sweater. J. Crew vintage XLT fits me like a glove perfecto, but it's got a little scratch to it.

1:06:39Chris Black:Unfortunately, this is a Jason problem. You just got to nut up. It sucks. We've all dealt with it before. The only thing I can say, which is not really applicable for the Los Angeles temperatures is wearing a long sleeve tee underneath it to keep you covered.

1:06:53Jason Stewart:Condom layer. I'll do my Uniqlo heat tech.

1:06:57Chris Black:Yeah, you could do a heat tech. Yeah, for sure.

1:06:58Jason Stewart:It's a barely there layer. Actually, Skim should make shirt condoms for itchy sweaters.

1:07:03Chris Black:For itchy sweaters. Cam, I know you're listening. It's a small but vocal group. Put North on the phone. Yeah, put Northie on the phone. She's in development. Great question though. All right, thank you for listening. Howlonggone.com is the website and we will talk to you guys soon. Bye-bye.

1:07:36Chris Black:Say mal, hast du bei der Steuer auch diesen Schulfashback? Einfach irgendwas raten und dann hoffen, dass es stimmt?

1:07:42Jason Stewart:Boah, nee, gar nicht. Wieso Steuer ist so mein Safe Space?

1:07:46Chris Black:You mean everything is safe?

1:07:48Jason Stewart:Yes, exactly. Wieso Steuer is the App that you just understand. Egal if Studium, Job or Umzug. Stimmt, krass. It feels like not like Steuern. Steuern erledigt?

1:08:00Chris Black:Safe.

1:08:01Jason Stewart:With Wieso Steuer.