960. - Chris & Jason

25:34It's a really, really, really difficult workout.

25:36Jason Stewart:I just did a mega reformer yesterday, and I was the same exact thing. You know, just anytime you're upside down, you just see the sweat just dripping off down your whole body onto the thing. But in the class yesterday, there's this person that's always in the class. Mysterious, doesn't talk to anyone. Blonde, kind of Russian, attractive-ish. but every time I see her she's wearing a different kind of workout clothing like it's the same brand it's like a fake brand I've never heard of but it all features it's like leggings and like a top but the leggings are all cargo shorts I have seen this I think she appears to be like sponsored by a cargo Lycra startup brand I have seen something like this in my fitness journey as well I wouldn't say I've seen it I've seen one person wear the same pair multiple times but I didn't know they had flavors like that I guess is what I'm saying I didn't know they were mass produced it felt like something someone made themselves yeah I mean it's very similar to there are worlds out there that I don't know exist in terms of like Zach Bryan having the number one song or like some random you know whatever artist you've never heard of that's at the number one charts like there's fashion realms out there that you are not privy to, but me living in the Burbank, Glendale area, I'm able to see things coming off the dock that other Americans don't have access to.

27:09Coming off the dock.

27:11Jason Stewart:I think that that is... I mean, I see a lot of fake Sporty and Rich out there. Yeah, definitely. Well, this is actually... Shut up. Yesterday when we were doing this American taste panel, this sort of the functionality thing came up as like a sort of a hallmark of American style. And I was like, yeah, I think that's the problem. And that's why guys are wearing stretchy pants to the office because it's like better to walk in, I guess, or whatever. You know what I mean? But now... Not better, easier. Cargo leggings, that feels like the... When are you ever putting anything in that pocket? Do you think she's ever cracked a pocket on the cargo leggings?

27:47Jason Stewart:I'd like to believe that the cargo pockets are strictly ornamental. They are not functioning. This could be discussed on the How to Spend It. Financial Times panel yesterday, but the functionality is not there at all. It's the illusion of functionality that us Americans are buying. No one's actually putting the Roto Hammer saw in their Carhartt working products. No, no, no, of course not. They're using it to sneak in a Diet Dr. Pepper into the fucking Marvel Masters of the Universe screening at 1145. Why do you wear cargo pants? Oh, I can fit two Diet Dr. Peppers in each pocket, so I got four movies three hours that's perfect i can knock them all out six inches six inches of jersey mic down each leg gusset it's like a it's like on kids stealing a 40 ounce fish's jersey mics with the cargos tucked into the sauce me i will piss myself oh wow i'm glad you're back in the swing of things big dog yeah i'm swinging um we were talking okay have you heard let's let's do some music somber has a new song that he teased out and people are upset with it i guess people are upset number one that no one he's not getting any flack for looking like ariana grande and ariana grande it's just in terms of bmi but he has the song called i like you but my body isn't ready and what do you think that means exactly and what maybe what's the goal of that

29:34song i i maintain this i think somber could be a virgin I know that seems crazy for a young good looking pop star but I feel like his is he giving virginity rocks well I'm saying that his his yes but I'm saying that his sort of his appeal is more

29:54Jason Stewart:for those who aren't ready it's a little more arm candy vibe than it is I'm getting plowed vibe if you're if you want to walk around with role model it's not because you're so attracted to him it's because he'll look good next to you and his outfit matches yours is kind of what I'm getting at. Got it. Okay. So it's a beautiful chihuahua on Paris Hilton's lap. It's not the... No, like Sombra is... The German shepherd that knows how to save a child from a building. You know, there's no... He has no function in the bedroom. Just pretty looking. Sombra is not exuding sexuality at all. There's no heat coming off Sombra's pin-fin frame, I'll say.

30:35Jason Stewart:Of his loins? Whereas someone like role model, I see the... We'll call it loin. He only has one loin. He's singing and the shirt comes up a little bit. I'm chubbed up. You know, it's different. The Somber just, Somber's got his whole belly out and no one's even looking. I mean, if you're a 14 year old girl, it's not sexual. Like it's the thing. It's like the idea of him is what you like. It's not even, I don't, I just think he's. You don't actually want to have sex with him. You just want to be near him and then kind of scream and then like take a photo and show your friends once you get home.

31:03Yeah. Because if he talks, it's going to be worse. You know what I mean? So it's like the best possible scenario. is a selfie at a mall is first base with selfie it's selfie on melrose is number one that's that's that kind of the end that's the first base and home run of the whole project i would say okay

31:17Jason Stewart:so you don't think that well i mean whenever my conspiratorial brain whenever there's these people who seem to be sort of upstreamed by the major labels where like oh like you're no longer like you're not like geese who just blew up like you're sort of crafted in a lab a little bit it makes you wonder if this is a decision or if this is just something like he already had this song you know in his little lyric book from high school and now he's going to roll it out or is this something saying like we need to you know have a song that's giving virgin and virgin vibes or like we don't have to fuck unfortunately i think he's the real deal in a way that i don't like to admit like i think he can actually write a smash no problem and that's why he that's why it got so big so quickly is because the songs are hits um i'm not debating that i i think he has the ability but do you think now do you think that like powers that be are like trying to you know just point him in the direction uh because it has a little like you know as as young people are becoming more and more asexual you know it has the the liz lemon vibe there's an episode of 30 rock where she has a crush on steve martin who's on like house arrest and he's saying like, we can't do anything.

32:35Jason Stewart:You know, like I have a weird phobia. I can't have sex. And all we're going to do is like sit on the couch and watch TV and eat ice cream. And she's like turned on by that. You know, is Somber playing into those female fans or male fans who are just like, sex is scary. I just want to look at you and look at pretty guy. The problem is, I think that Somber's hit that point pretty early in his career where he can literally shit out anything and those people are going to want it and like it like i think that the i think that his lyrical content is is juvenile enough where i just don't think it matters i wish it was more calculated than that but i literally think at this point they're like hey you got this far on your instincts like bro if you want to talk about being a virgin do it you whatever you got because isn't the isn't the is this the song you got the touch i haven't listened to it yet but is this the is it like is it like a video of him singing to the camera Is that how it, it's not like you can't listen to it on iTunes.

33:32Jason Stewart:Yeah, it's like, he's like, it's like him in a, yeah, I don't know. It's like a little snippet on social media. Okay, is it? It's not released yet. Did you listen to it? Is it good? Haven't made it to verse three. I mean, it's literally just him like beating his chest, like cry, screaming. Oh, it's like dashboard mode. There's no, okay, there's no backing. There's no band. There's no. It's just him and it's like him like self shot on the phone in his hotel room, but he's, he's singing. I like you, but my body isn't ready. but with the conviction of the Goo Goo Dolls anthem, and then he looks like he's about to sort of double over in tears and convulsions because he likes you so much, but is not ready to cross that line.

34:15I don't even, it's so stupid. It's honestly an insane thing. Now that you're describing it in that way that's so clear, it's like, bro, what are you talking about? Like, come on, man. What do you even mean by that?

34:26Jason Stewart:Well, I think it is pandering. It's sort of like uncharted territory in the world of heartthrob content creators. That's true. That's true, actually. You know what I mean? Where he saw an opening and he said, I'm okay with... Virgin money buys my Birkin bag just the same way that fucking money buys... Yeah. This is a great route. It's low-hanging fruit. You know, there's a hundred geese out there. I'm going to pick the slowest one and my bald eagle ass is going to take him home and eat him. I need to watch the video of him scream crying to camera. That sounds like good stuff. Great stuff. Yeah, at the very end, I hate to spoil it, but he falls back on his hotel room bed because his body can't really, it's unable to stand on its own anymore because of the virginity coursing through his thick vein.

35:18I can't, dude, I can't, bro. I can't with this fucking guy. I mean, between this - Did you watch it? No, fuck no. I'm not going to watch it. Between this and Benson Boone trying to make Alex Earl his beard, it's been a tough week for the fake Harry Styles. You know, it's been a tough week. Harry's performing with an orchestra, you know, playing some of his classic songs. And then we got Benson Boone leaving a restaurant with Alex Earl. They're six feet from each other, you know?

35:44Jason Stewart:Okay, what do you think it means that people seem to be more interested in Benson Boone and Alex Earl going to dinner than Harry Styles playing night after night of sold-out arena shows. Well, there's no... I mean, once you're playing sold-out arena shows, your job is done. There ain't nothing to say about it. Kind of. You know what I mean? It's not exciting anymore. Like, the ticket gate and the sell-out and Ticketmaster shit, that was the fun of that. Now, fans are just going to see what they paid for. And he's, you know... If you like him, it's delivering. If you don't, you think it's bad. I guess he's on tour and Rosalia is on tour.

36:25Jason Stewart:He's 10 times bigger than Rosalia, yet because she's doing the confessionals and she's doing the this and the that, it's popping up in the zeitgeist more so than him. I feel like he's just like a pink concert. Let's calm down. I think that Rosalia played New York City and Maggie Rogers outed some guy on stage. That got pressed. Marcelo Hernandez went up there. Nobody was talking about it. let's just but not that not that he's not i mean he's fucking funny but i'm just saying to you that i think that that's the other thing i have to give harry credit for regardless of the example i feel like people like i'm seeing more like paparazzi photos of of her on the street than him i'm no you're looking at the wrong places bro you're looking at the wrong places well i'm not looking anywhere that's just what you know my algo friend my little elf that lives in my computer is is showing me and it's not like one is more but it's like we my my feed is rosalia gay and your feed is harry styles what i'm saying to you what i'm saying to you is though is that i see paparazzi pictures of harry styles every single day pause i also think that as we've discredited start looking at chicks well harry styles is only one only one only pop star in recent memory that hasn't done some sort of trick where he brings up his celebrity friends to do a shtick, which is interesting that that didn't make it.

37:51Jason Stewart:No shtick, no pic. Rosalia is the biggest psyop. I cannot believe that people pretend to like Rosalia. White people, white people. Everybody else, of course. I appreciate the show and the choreography is sick with all the hands. I've seen a couple of clips. It's very cool. but like i'm sensing some tharkadam in your voice chris no no i really like that i really think it's cool i think she's really cool i just think it's a lie if you listen to that music at your house well i like watching her because she's hot you like like you like the hand choreo which is cool you know whatever i don't even think she's she's sexy i don't think she's hot okay somber well also she's gay bro she don't want your shit no she's b that's how they call bye over there

38:38oh you you aren't up on that yet okay that's just i mean that's some new slang if you want to take

38:42Jason Stewart:that down your moleskin for later she'd be ax jeremy she'd be good point good all i gotta do is put on 60 pounds of muscle and lose two feet in height and i'm in a threg bone i will say when i saw her at the gym i got it get out your fucking wallet it's time to talk about rocket money baby I'm trying to save some money. I was talking to a friend of the show, Bryn Walner, yesterday, and she was saying if you look at your subscriptions, you could be living like me. That's what she was saying. She was saying if you use Rocket Money to find out which subscriptions you were paying for without your knowledge, then maybe you could be in Switzerland like me.

39:18You could be in Geneva. You could be at F1.

39:19Jason Stewart:Yeah, it does make sense. I think it really boils down to everyone knows it, but they just don't have the time. They don't want to do it. Everyone knows they can go clean all the clothes out of their closet, sell them and then take that money and buy and buy you know a dream vacation or a trip to geneva or a new rolex but you just don't do you don't have the time it's too much work luckily nowadays places like rocket money do it all for you they're happy to do it for you so then all that money that you're saving we can turn that into truly whatever it is that you want just make sure that you're not just taking all that money and resubscribing to the same services that you didn't use before okay I've never done anything like that.

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40:50Jason Stewart:Yeah, overthinking summer. It happens to a lot of us workaholics out there. Or let's say you're about to go spend a lot of time on the beach at the pool, and you don't want to be one of those guys that always has to pull their shirt down every time you lift your hands up or do a cannonball. With a little therapy with our friends at BetterHelp, we'll be able to fall, do a tumble, do a cartwheel without quickly pulling that shirt back down to cover your stomach. With over 30 ,000 therapists, BetterHelp is the world's largest online therapy platform. serving over 6 million people globally and it works with an average rating of 4.9 out of 5 based on 1.7 million client reviews you don't have to say yes to everything this summer find support in therapy sign up and get 10 off at betterhelp.com slash how long that is better h e l p dot com slash how long sure but also she's an amazing singer and she seems like a fun person and is a cool sexy chica you know she's like claro with more seasoning yeah no i i get i get all of that i just think it's i think it's crazy i honestly i truly think it's crazy that white people in america have love music that is not made for them and they can't really understand it whether it's rosalia or k-pop do you know what i mean i'm like oh what what is it that you or bjork bjork is a prime example she didn't even say in english like what is it that you like i mean i guess i guess this goes back to lyrics she ain't saying human words lyrics yeah she's speaking robot i guess i i just think it's an interesting it's interesting that like that's what is really popular now maybe it speaks to the diversity of america you know but i know plenty of white boys that are listening to k-pop and it's like dude you can't but i guess we also know plenty of adult white boys listening to olivia rodrigo and that's also its own problem yeah but i mean i think i blame the internet for that i think you know japanese people have been coveting coveting you know whatever american rock and roll since since the 60s and you know other countries have been enjoying music from other countries no of course of course i just think that it but but you're saying it's but now that it's happening in america yeah is that the difference i think it's different but i also think it's like people are making it their personality it's not just like oh i fuck with this right it's like a bigger it's like a bigger thing because you want it helps you identify as like seemingly more interesting i think okay like being like oh i just i really like sabrina carpenter is like oh that's cool but if i really really like rosalia that means i'm spicy and i i get it and you don't or it could also just mean that that's what you prefer more and one is not better or worse and one's not signaling something more you might like oh totally you know you might like some a tostada with chicharron more than you like whatever you know zara larson food you know sardines on toast with some schmorkenbjörg in fact in this case in this case in this case jason i actually yeah i like tostadas more than than zara larson food so that's it no i of course i mean i i agree there's of course there's there's real i know i know what you mean about the identity because when you have like a straight white american person who makes rosalia their identity you got to keep an eye on them yeah that's that's what i'm saying if you have a straight you're 35 year old homie who's who's really into you know black pink or whatever then yeah let's let's keep an eye on them yeah you got to just keep an eye on them that's all i'm saying and and look i'm not i'm sure there's examples of this that i am deeply guilty of too so it's not you know none of this is out of the question or if you or if you want to interview olivia rodrigo about boys she has crushes on when you're 35 or 45 i mean let's keep two eyes on you that shit i don't know man i can't even i can't even begin to i can't even begin to get into that stuff but that is the the world that we live in i mean poptimism and fucking dissecting it's it's but i feel like the olivia Rodrigo thing I feel like there's so much blowback but it's obviously the numbers are crazy you know what I mean it's like breaking records so I guess none of that actually matters so who who should be interviewing I mean I guess is it weird that it seems like more men are interviewing Olivia Rodrigo than women well Jason that's something called the patriarchy and men have more power in the media space and that's something we need to work on um but I sent you that I sent you that tweet earlier that like it's depressing that now if you got an album to promote you got to go eat chicken with a bald guy or eat chicken with a british chick which is fucking hilarious but it's also like i would rather see i would rather see anyone talk to sean evans or amelia than talk to anthony fantano or whatever that's the bottom of the bottom so i guess if we remove chicken from the equation altogether uh sean evans and hot ones when he's talking to the hottest woman on planet earth zero zero weird ick zero creepy vibes zero hover hand actually i haven't seen i haven't watched this goes back to you talking whatever last week about how don't don't forget he's a he's a stick man don't forget he's been he's been pounding booze oh big sean yeah big sean you can get poked on all this to say he knows how to act around a a famous beautiful woman and not get all sweaty that's true but then when you hear i mean and also somehow nardwar doesn't cross that line even though he looks like a walking sex offender nardwar is not creepy at all looks like the wanted poster and he knows where your mom's buried yeah like he literally knows your childhood he has your mom's mail and to look through to get questions you're right he doesn't come off creepy it's too it's too nerdy there's gonna be a great hulu nardwar special after he dies and they find the hard drive oh lord the hard drive is going to be like the all the albums the roots sampled it's not even going to be it's not going to be as good as you think it is i think it's a problem i was planning for something a little more in the neverland ranch space but i know you were i know you were but i just can't i i don't think but i do i was leaning more at david attenborough i think all these places i i just think it's like i think it's fine you got an album to promote you got to go you got to promote it that's that's all good just where's the female anthony fontana is what i'm saying well women women aren't nerds that's the this is this comes up a lot in the fashion world because men take things to this degree where women are like does this make me look good and do i feel good in it i'm gonna buy it men are talking about stitch count and construction and and where it was made versus where it was you know what i mean it's like men take everything to this level that's like dude shut up that's not how you fold the pocket square literally literally it's like women are like this dress makes you look hot and i like the designer and i'm gonna buy it and that's it that one that shirt makes your titties look bad okay i won't buy it literally done whereas a guy is gonna ask oliver rigo the most insane questions about you know lyric writing and a girl would just be like yeah this rocks that guy broke your heart you know and it's like i would rather hear that probably like i would rather hear oliver oliver rigo on call her daddy than i would on like nerd shit.

47:54Jason Stewart:Would you rather hear Olivia Rodrigo on Jake Shane's podcast or Anthony Fantano's podcast? Jake Shane. I'm going to give it to, I'm going to give it to, speaking of elves, I'm going to give it to Shane. And I can't say I don't disagree because you don't get the feeling that Olivia Rodrigo is, you know, has something going on in the back of her head, you know, in her reptile animal brain of like danger is near. Yeah, yeah. like i just have a sense in the that there's a potential threat in the room i know that my managers here and several cast and crew are on set and you know nothing's going to happen but still i don't know i also i don't really know anything about anthony fonton i don't really know anything about him i've i mean i see his face all the time obviously and i know that he is very very very popular but i don't know because he's i i was under the impression he was sort of just the new nardwar vibe wise yeah well his thing is is is rating music he's sort of like yes yes yes he gives a number a numerical rating um and people are saying like you know are we now that he's interviewing people can we trust oh his uh you know his integrity if he if he knows that rodrigo is coming to coming over to the stew in two weeks are we going to give her a light three or are we going to give her a high eight you know what i mean i actually think that a guy like that takes himself so strong himself so seriously that he would not let a an interview compromise his review which is good and bad i agree i found another somber video and then we'll move on his caption for that song i wrote this song about how every time i want someone i'm too insecure about my body to do anything about it bro shut the fuck up oh my god i mean look any he is he He is underweight, I guess.

49:44Jason Stewart:Yeah, we don't body shame on this pod, and everyone is going through their own special journey. But Big Psalm, I think the writing is on the wall. Every time you walk into a room, you got about 17 baddies who are ready, willing, and able to do whatever you want them to do. We need to mentor him. I need to Johnny Drama Somber. We don't need to mentor him. We need to give him protein, bro. He doesn't need any mentoring. That's part of the program. That's the whole program. That's what I'm saying. The whole program is eat more and work out a little bit, and let's get some shoulders. You know what I mean?

50:17Let's get like you got the abs down, but where are the quads? Where's the back? Where are the lats?

50:22Jason Stewart:Also, do we know maybe you'll look better with 20 pounds of fat on you? Not even muscle, but just like. No, don't do that. Now, if he put on 20 pounds, he'd lose the Ferragamo deal. That's the problem. He's got too much riding on the bod. That's the thing about the music. He's so tall, he could stay sample size snatchy on a 20. Yeah, that's true. You know what I mean? That's actually, I think you're actually right about that. He probably could. He'll only have to punch out three holes on the belt instead of four this time. Progress. Let's move into Drewski. I mentioned a deep conspiracy theory that I don't believe, but he was spotted at Travis Kelsey's semi-bachelor.

51:10Jason Stewart:See, this is the problem. You're framing this wrong. It was a dinner of four people. But the headline I read said the bro dinner, the pre-wedding bro dinner. So it's sort of, like I said, a semi-informal. It's giving bachelor vibes. To be fair, if you're Travis Kelsey. But that is a TMZ headline, so take that with nothing. If you're Travis Kelsey and you're getting married to Taylor Swift, then every dinner you have before that with anyone is a pre-wedding. Do you know what I mean? They're making a mountain out of a molehill. That's what I mean. Well, we don't know that for sure, Chris. The wedding is soon, right?

51:46If you think that Travis Kelsey's bachelor party would be him at dinner with three dudes in Malibu, you are sadly mistaken. You are sadly mistaken.

51:54Jason Stewart:What do you think his bachelor party is going to be? Is he going to be allowed to go to Magic City? No. No, no, no. It would be more of a dive bar. Maybe we're going hunting, fishing. I would guess he could do whatever he wants. If he thinks that Taylor will let him, I just don't think she will. Well, what if she's cool enough to let him have a real actual bachelor party? But maybe do you think she would control the guest list? Like you can invite some girls, but not all of them. And I have to know which ones, You don't invite girls to a bachelor party no matter who your wife is. I don't mean as like friendskies.

52:36Jason Stewart:I don't mean besties. I mean more like the girl that Drewski was with at that party. I don't know what her name is, but I searched it on Twitter and there's she's a pro, we'll say. In the football space. This is one of your worst conspiracy theories of all time. Four people went to dinner together. No, no, no. My actual conspiracy theory has nothing to do with that it's more so that i'm i'm worrying that druski worry i'm in the process i'm perturbed i am worried i'm in the process i'm i'm i'm considering the possibility that they are going to turn druski into a ditty because he's a lovable person that swims in all the circles he's at taylor swift's wedding he's a chief keef wedding you're saying to me you're you're saying that you're you think they're going to send his fat happy ass to go procure women for the for the fellas i think that he is going to be somebody that they're like all right well you know we got this thing coming up maybe we get a little you know maybe get a little travis and this little nfl batty couple picks in case you know somebody decides they don't want to renew the amazon podcast deal contract and we got a little oh you're saying Drewski would be running interference like they could just throw it on him yeah they throw it on him that was just Drewski whatever but all that all you need is the pic of Travis and the and the girl that he used to DM before Taylor came around together you know at some dinner and then he will do anything before letting that picture go into Taylor's claws and now you got him compromised diddy style you know because he was he would have everyone party get him fucked up and film them in those situations and people were alleging that major labels and things like that were using that as blackmail Epstein style.

54:29I don't think I think you've got to stop taking the edibles. I think this is a

54:33Jason Stewart:like I said before, I don't believe this. This is just something that I'm wondering. Just presenting it alone. It shows a view inside of your twisted mind that may not maybe shouldn't be public. Maybe it shouldn't be public. If you're thinking like this, it's like what is he doing? You know what I'm saying? What is who doing? You're taking the... You. That's what I'm saying. When your mind goes like this, I'm saying you've got to be careful throwing this shit around. Got it, got it. Oh, because... You know what I mean? You're saying that they're going to come get me. Because you're going to get me caught up because I'm associated with you.

55:04Like, that's... Like, am I Travis Kelsey and you're Drewski or am I... You know, who knows?

55:08Jason Stewart:Look, I'm a friend to Jewish people. I'm not worried about me, about myself. I'm not worried about you either in this instance, but I think Drewski... I think Drewski is actually... The fact that Drewski doesn't really have any dirt on his name at this point, I think it means that he is very, very careful with what he does and how he does it, is what I will say. Yeah, but also everyone, they get comfortable and you start getting away with some stuff and you start seeing how far you can push it, you know? No, sure, of course. I just don't think that's... Especially when you're a fat guy your whole life, he ain't got no pussy, and now he's getting some certified diet.

55:43Jason Stewart:Drewski's getting more pussy than every guy at that dinner. No question. Drewski's beat him off with a fucking stick no question because he's got charisma exactly he's got riz as they say as they do say okay I've been watching a little soccer a little football I'm sorry to hear that I don't know I'm trying to I think I'm getting bullish on sports I think it's going to be big Chris I think in the future I was thinking I was thinking about this yesterday you know that people are talking about the taste economy and we have to like, this is like a, I want to set up an agency where we teach people like us, guys like us who are not, you know, avid sports enthusiasts, you know, because it's good for the overall career to go out on the golf course and talk about how you lost 1800 on the bangles yesterday.

56:36Jason Stewart:And you know about this draft and this injury, I think knowing about sports will potentially get you further, uh, you know, in, in the creator worlds. Oh, I think that's true, but I've chosen my path. I know, but I'm saying I'm going to give it a go. I'm going to try to know more about sports. I'm going to force myself to enjoy sports the way that like jock dudes have to force themselves to like, you know, geese. You're leaning in. You're leaning in. This is getting too suburban. That's what I fear. If you start inviting me to hang out with you and your neighbors to watch the game. Oh, never. never watch my neighbor.

57:16Jason, that's what you think, but this is a slippery slope because that's the one the great thing and the worst thing about sports is it brings people together that should never be together, which is a beautiful thing.

57:28Jason Stewart:So it's dangerous. It's a double-edged blade is what you're saying. It's a double-edged blade. It's as beautiful as it is dangerous, and it puts you in rooms with people you should never be in the room with. Sound like a Buck Cherry lyric. I'm over here. It's just something to think about. Okay, well, I'm keeping an eye on it. Well, I'm still in the process of force-feeding myself a soccer match. Well, soccer is not the one because that doesn't matter. Well, I've mastered watching a baseball game and a football game and a basketball game. You've mastered it? I'd like to talk to some real fans, give you a little test.

58:01I bet they would maybe say different.

58:02Jason Stewart:I didn't say I've mastered. You can plop your dumb ass on the couch and order a pizza. I can turn the TV on. Me too. Yes. I said I've mastered watching it. I could do that. I've mastered watching it too then, I guess. Yes, you have. We have the reps. We have the 10 ,000 hours. I have watched baseball games probably 10 ,000 hours of my life. Oh, yeah, me too. Absolutely, me too, which is funny because after soccer, it's the worst sport. Potentially, yes, potentially not. But I was noticing something. I think that soccer players across all continents, not just certain areas, whatever, but no matter where you're from, from Canada to Sweden to Africa to China, whatever.

58:42Jason Stewart:I think soccer players have the highest population of black guys with bleached hair. No question. A hundred percent. A hundred percent. That is an astute observation. The thing about soccer that is the coolest is that they're the most fit by far. They're in unbelievable shape and it requires so much skill and endurance. It's unbelievable. But I just can't even begin to watch it or care about it. And I just don't know. I just don't. Even the World Cup, like I see people at bars and shit screaming and yelling, but I think in America, it's an excuse to drink at 10 a.m. Yeah. I think that's what, I think that's really the timing of it all, especially with the Premier League and all that stuff.

59:24That is what I always thought appealed to people who are American because we're not raised to like soccer in the way that other countries are.

59:30Jason Stewart:But also I don't want to, I don't find myself ever watching any sports really unless it's a cultural event like the finals or the Super Bowl or whatever, or it happens to be a really good, crazy series and everyone has to watch. Otherwise, I have no interest in it whatsoever. And I know that so many people have true pleasure is derived from this, and I'm trying to tap into some of that regular pleasure just sitting there. I am jealous of people who can enjoy sports. I'm totally with you on that because it does seem like such an easy thing to sit back and just like, and, and, you know, I just, I think that I'm a, I have PTSD from this Knicks parade still.

1:00:14And the video of that fat woman dumping the trash can out and taking it home with her.

1:00:19Jason Stewart:Um, yeah, that's a, that's an awful video. It's an unbelievable video. And I saw somebody, so basically if you haven't seen it, there's a giant woman who there's a Knicks colored trash can that they put out in the streets to celebrate the victory. The trash can is over flowingly full her big ass picks it up painted orange and blue ugliest trash can you could imagine her big ass picks it up dumps all the trash out and walks away with the trash can to i guess add it to her trophy room in in you know crown heights i guess i don't know going in the middle of the of the studio apartment unhosed the thing about that is i saw people saying of course this is sports fandom but the real culprit here is like supreme culture like i you The way that when the Playboy Cardi Supreme posters, people are getting out their magnifying glass and a hairdryer and trying to get the wheat paste down to take home to their apartment.

1:01:11It's like, what are we talking about? Are we going to sell this on eBay in 20 years? What is it that you want? What is so important about this that you're willing to take a trash can into your house?

1:01:22Jason Stewart:And also you're willing to be filmed by 100 people in broad daylight emptying out a trash can, dumping nasty shit all over the sidewalk for somebody getting paid minimum wage to clean up. And then you're going to go home and spend a week and a half arguing with people on Facebook Marketplace and make 75 bucks off it at the end of the day. No, it's authentic. It's been authenticated by the RealReal team? I wish it was because of sports fans. I wish it was because she was such a diehard fan, but I feel like it is more of a financial play, and I think it will pan out the way that you're saying, whereas maybe the investment doesn't return.

1:02:04Jason Stewart:I'd like to see the sort of, not the year to date, but the week to date since it's only a week old, just like what the value, because I know that somebody somewhere posted that on Facebook Marketplace and was like, here's one of the trash cans, 1 ,500, and everyone's like oh shit these are going for 1500 and then everyone goes out and is dumping trash out all over the city doesn't necessarily mean that anyone's buying these used trash cans for 1500 no and we can't there's already enough there's already enough trash on the streets yeah you know what i mean there's not you don't need to dumping it out like that we still haven't recovered from this parade like we still have not recovered like there are still gates out you're still you're still traumatized and i'm feeling for i feel like you need to need to escape from new york a little bit maybe don't worry i'm i'm always there's always an escape on the on the horizon you know at least i i but yeah i'm i'm still reeling i'm still reeling from it i have to i have to go out and about today but at least it's it's nice enough outside where you can sort of overlook it it's that that kind of shit in the winter is is much much worse but when it mixes with the snow you know oh yeah because everyone just the garbage system in new york is you just put the bags on the sidewalk and then the rats kind of work their way in there and and get the get Get the train going.

1:03:16Jason Stewart:Well, speaking of travel, I saw a stat I wanted to run it by. You get some intel and maybe some insights as a local. Top five U.S. cities ranked by OnlyFans spending. Number five, Las Vegas. Number four, Miami. Number three, Denver. Number two, Seattle. Number one, Atlanta, Georgia. Oh, hell yeah. We've done it again, baby. What is it about the ATL-ians that you think makes them want to patronize OnlyFans more than anywhere else in the country? I like to think they respect strippers over there. They respect sex workers. It's a part of the economy and the community. I think that Miami, you're just supporting your brothers and sisters in the industry.

1:04:02Your neighbors. Seattle is like, I work at Microsoft and I'm a nerd.

1:04:06Jason Stewart:Seattle is if I don't do OnlyFans I'm going to kill my family You're saying this is people spending money This is spending Then Atlanta 100 % It's strip club It's like a strip club but I get a little more And I get to keep it I think that does feel like I think you get a little less and you get to keep it You don't get to touch it but you get to keep it Okay yeah that's a good point Depending on how much you're spending But that's a very interesting stat And I'm surprised I thought it would honestly I thought maybe San Francisco I thought like a tech like a place where people are really flush with cash and don't aren't necessarily known for getting chicks would be number one.

1:04:48And that's what I think when I think of San Francisco.

1:04:49Jason Stewart:That's what I think of not necessarily known for getting chicks. I mean think about it. No, it's true. Show me the lie. You're right. You're right. I guess R.I.P. Take Heath. That's sad, man. Very sad. Very sad. That's sad. I mean, 29. apparently people owed him a lot of money yeah he produced Sicko Mode which is one of the biggest stream songs just period in the history of the world across genres and time he should have been flush for that. Never have to work again really. If you play your cards right if you produce Sicko Mode and you really get published on that you should never have to work again.

1:05:26Jason Stewart:It's a shame because some of our goats are the ones who are potentially being called out like Drake, your goat and Sexy Red, mine yeah it's true i i i feel like it's hard it's getting harder and harder for me to get it sexy i feel like drake i just feel like drake he's never had charges like this i know you know what i mean like no one's ever accused drake of not paying so it feels strange but who knows we can always blame everything on travis scott always he's the culprit of everything bad that's how i looked is it bad it's everything bad i agree fuck r.i.p. r.i.p. take heath um all right let's go HowLongGone.com is the website.

1:06:05We're back next week with more podcasts. Don't you worry. Thank you guys for all of your support on our Bister Village trip. We had a blast, and I'm really happy with the way our little video turned out. I thought it was funny.

1:06:18Jason Stewart:It was a tidy piece of content, wasn't it? It was. It really was. But yeah, thank you guys for that, and we'll be back soon with more Get Down or Lay Down. Yeah, and if you're living Boyle Heights, I don't know, put on a mask or something.

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