966. - Chris & Jason

0:18How long gone? Happy 250 to them genes and all of the Americans listening to how long gone today we wouldn't want to of course we wouldn't want to alienate our international audience but

0:30Jason Stewart:this is our our time jason yeah suck it england and mexico algeria well no no i'll let them cook i'll actually let them cook okay we like algeria okay i like to see where the yeah i'm good i'm good uh 250 much to celebrate in this great country right now huh i mean dude look party in the usa it's hot you know we got the world cup people act like they care about soccer still i didn't think it would last this long like i didn't think people could fake it for this long but i think it's the international visitors because i'm in miami and um steph and zach took us on the boat you know we did a little cruise around dipped in the ocean then we went to their fisher island which is like a whatever it's a club they go to and we went to that we went to the the bar so everybody could have a drink after our sale and it was like real argentina time at the bar and i was like oh these motherfuckers are serious like they're arguing with the staff about it like in spanish i'm like this i'm like this is awesome like these guys like that's how competitive this is is it that like they're talking trash to the staff and the staff doesn't give a fuck they're giving it right back i would like to know what the staff at this at the club down at the club have uh have to do with i mean we you were watching the argentina game where they almost were upset by cape verde is that yeah it was on the it was on the tv and then the guy who's bringing out the aperol spritz is getting an earful it was more of a it felt like a heated discussion in spanish about something that was beyond my pay grade and understanding of of the sport you know what i mean but that look i don't i was we went to we went to get alex and i went to get dinner after and we were at uchi having some sushi and i swear to god i would say down on brickel uh there was one there's one closer different yeah there's the one uchi co which is a new it's the similar i don't know what the difference is but i would say more than more than half the tables had their phones out watching that game and sure i'm just like look i'm fine with that i guess do what you got to do but like what is there a restaurant you you know restaurants are there restaurants like would 11 madison park shut that down like what restaurant would be like i know it's the world cup guys and i know you're in miami i know you speak spanish but like come on like this is a fucking restaurant like put your phone away you got it propped up on the water jug you know what i mean it's ugly it's ugly but like i can you tell people no i see it um it's interesting because it's very commonplace in europe you know world cup or not just any yeah it's any football happening you go into the town piazza you go to any restaurant any bar and that's why i don't live in europe play place and they got the iPhone propped up on the water jug, as you said, or whatever.

3:12Jason Stewart:And I kind of think it's like charming and quaint and community driven over there because they attach so much of their life to their national team, you know, whatever, you know, you're in Milan, everyone in the whole city is electric and they're watching the games and they're kissing neighbors and hugging strangers. In America, it just feels different and wrong. And I don't know, but Miami is a international city full of you know full of people who really breathe live everything football so you're you're sort of behind closed doors i think if you if your restaurant has a michelin star or is recognized as uh okay then you are not allowed to have take it down a notch uh your phone watching anything on video i don't care if it's football or friends or yeah yeah you know whatever it is unless maybe but like if there's like another 9-11 happening and we're all watching it like maybe we're not gonna have the the melon consomme dish maybe we'll just like go home and call our love that's what because that's what i mean i i i mean look i care so much about it why are you at this restaurant right now well i would have pulled up i would have pulled up the fox news stream of the celebration if it was the fourth you know what i mean but it was the third so i couldn't there's nothing for me to watch on the on the on the screen i like i love the idea of you, your cracker ass going into La Cantina or at Uchiko and every TV is blasting the Argentina game and you go over there one by one with the remote control and you switch it over to the 250 live stream on Fox.

4:46I'm not going to, I watched a little bit of it last night just to check out what was going on. Man, it is awesome. It's really, it really is awesome.

4:53Jason Stewart:I almost watched a little bit of it yesterday. I watched a little bit and they were just sort of talking about soccer. They were talking about soccer and basically saying how isn't it awesome how all these foreign people came to america and discovered how great we are in ranch dressing that's literally what they were saying like how nice and cool we are i'm like dude i don't think that's what they i don't i think they'll i think they would have gone to a third world country that just got bombed if their team was playing there i don't think they give a fuck i think that i think the ranch dressing and the hot sauce was just a bonus i'm not sure that was the major takeaway from their trip yeah i mean i I am seeing some stories and it's hard to tell which ones are, you know, propaganda and which ones are real.

5:31Jason Stewart:And you see like, oh, this old German guy, you know, didn't know what Uber was and he got lost for three weeks. And a family, you know, villagers took him in and raised him as their own. You know, you hear these stories and you're like, okay, maybe America ain't so bad after all. But I feel like everyone knows what's going on. They don't want to be in America. these people these like colombian baddies don't want to be in fucking pittsburgh no you know in line at panera brad you know so before they watch their their their team play they would much rather be in a cool dope place no offense to pittsburgh i mean i'm sure it's like the it's fun to be anywhere that's not home just like you know like anywhere like when anyone travels it's exciting but like on week two at the fucking kimpton is it like you know what man the ketchup is better here but you know i'm out 10 grand and my team lost you call that you call this dynamite sauce what is it what exactly is in here it's addicting xo you say i don't understand sriracha and chipotle together wow i just i think i think these i feel like these sort of you know the videos of the japanese guys in houston or whatever you know what i mean i do believe that is if you're a Japanese guy and you're in Houston and you're fucking riding mechanical bull and drinking tequila, that is sick.

6:52You are having the time of your life. I'm just saying, I think these experiences aren't maybe universal, let's say, and we're only hearing about the good ones.

7:00Jason Stewart:We're only hearing about the one in a million stories where the bookish Korean guy gets to have his first kiss with a baddie Latina. With an only fan. She's a 5.5, but who cares? it doesn't matter it doesn't matter bro it doesn't matter yeah love is love love is love i think i think that stuff is beautiful but yeah it's happened three times with within eight billion people on the planet it's happened three times and we heard about it but all in all it's good and positive and i think we're learning especially you know in this month or in this particular two-week span the world cup is kind of the best we got whereas our whole entire life the World Cup came as Americans.

7:44Jason Stewart:Yeah. You know, it was just sort of like a weird, it was not even a mosquito buzzing around. It didn't, you had to seek it out. Yeah, for sure. It didn't really enter your life. It's like every time you turn on the TV, the Stanley Cup playoffs are happening or the Stanley Cup finals are happening. You're like, I guess hockey's happening now. You know, whatever. It's there. You got to seek it out. But now it's really the only positive, you know, I guess jackass reloaded and the World Cup is all that we have to hold on to. Yeah, I've had enough of the emotional jackass writing as well. Not that I just, I mean, I, of course, watch jackass.

8:21That's our generation. That's one of our greatest exports. But I've seen at least five.

8:26Jason Stewart:TKY raised me. I've seen at least five stories being like, I watched the jackass. I cried at the end of jackass. This is what millennial men. It's just like, dude, everything can't be about men. like i i and i say that whoa it's just like who are you it's just like dude shut the fuck up it's a movie and it's funny and i did like i mean look when i saw johnny knoxville like seeing bam's parents on the red carpet and crying of course that moved of course that moved me you know i'm not i'm not i'm not flesh and blood at the end of the day i'm not built of stone but at a certain point why am i on cnn.com reading about someone like relating this to their dad's death it's like what are we what interviewing a guy like yeah i got my first hemorrhoid uh m80 explosion in in 2007 and it just really takes me back when we man you know had diarrhea on the on the roller coaster like you can't you can't i'm gonna tell my grandkids about you can't just be like yo this shit rocks it's cool they did a final one you know what i mean it has to be like it has to be like well you don't know how this changed that this affected my psyche as a young man you know Well, we got to make content every day.

9:33Jason Stewart:We're all content creators. You're telling me, bro. Jackass coming out, it's like, okay. Now I know what to post about today. I did not see it. I planned to. I almost saw it when I was in Rhode Island last weekend. But the movie theater was in a mall. And for some reason, that was just depressing me a little bit. I didn't want to come out of the film at like 4.17 p.m. on a Sunday. All right, Letterboxd, calm down. we're not calling jackass a film that's a fucking movie come on now okay so i said a movie criterion i didn't say i don't know you said you said i'm gonna come out no you said i'm gonna come out of the film i'm look i'm just telling you i'm just watching out for you bro i want you to sound i want you to speak correctly about the art form that i care the least about i'm just trying to help but i'm trying to help out a film speaking of i'm i'm badly sunburned right now i've got a film of sarah v all over me um but yeah the jackass nostalgia you know it's we don't know how to say goodbye we don't know how to put the casket in the ground and and do the right thing we don't know how to not make it about us i mean people are very people are very i will say i wasn't expecting the outpouring that has happened i i didn't i mean obviously i know it was affected us especially our generation because that was that was a big deal like that's like you know and bam being back and now you know whatever all that stuff people love to see a redemption of course but it's just sort of like the britney spears of jackass they somebody called him yeah well don't oh don't worry there's a story about him now talking about i think it's like how do you get off drugs you do drugs and it's about him like liking mushrooms now instead of fucking bacardi it's like all right man we'll see how this turns out for you bro i'm glad you can kick flip again i think i think some people hey he can kick oxys and he could kick flip 540 backside uh i i think that some people are able to microdose you know mushrooms and use it to to seek sobriety but uh you know as you know i agree nobody recommends that and you know who i don't think can do that you know i don't think can do that is bam vargera that's that's the one of all the people i mean if it's working it's working by god do whatever you got to do i don't want you to die but you know it just seems like a a risky path for him particularly i think there are some people out there the few the proud who really you can't you can never go cold turkey once you had a taste of it, you have to live sort of Elmer glued together with a series of low-dose something-somethings.

12:02Jason Stewart:Yeah, yeah. And I'm glad that he's microdosing some psychedelics. He probably got it from a cool guy at the Baker house or whatever, and it's vetted and tested, and it's all good versus him looking for Kratom in Ohio overpass somewhere. you know that's that's more of a slippery thing i like that he's just sticking to the yeah the classic venice yeah this is the classic um type of drug to all the people telling us we should have the couple that climbed on top of the empire state building on this podcast you're out of your fucking mind why would i want to talk to those people there's absolutely nothing to say people who do stunts like that visual stunts where it's like look at me i climbed the thing that's that's all they got they don't have an hour yeah they have nothing they have nothing if they put jimmy Hendrix lyrics on a flag what could be cornier than that you know what I mean what could be they wouldn't be doing stuff like that it's too risky exactly you don't you don't have to have an eight pack and climb up on the highest building in the world if you have something to say that's the whole thing with that you're absolutely right Jason their personalities are probably drier than toast yeah Seth Rogen doesn't have to put on cat ear hoodies and like hot topic gloves to to wave an awesome flag I didn't know that was a Jimi Hendrix quote that's good to know that I either nothing nothing worse than that um i i think it is i was i heard that somewhere and i was like that makes sense those are the kind of people that love jimmy hendrix and like janice joplin you know what i mean like the worst people you went to high school with no i was i was leading more of like the like the random like russian person who's like jimmy hendrix number one oh that's no the in high school there was a type of person that was like a jock but like loved Dazed and Confused and Led Zeppelin and Jimi Hendrix and I was like this is worse than liking what's on the radio honestly I would rather you listen to Christina Aguilera than try to tell me about Jimi Hendrix.

13:53Jason Stewart:He's learning Blackbird on acoustic Hendrix tough to beat It's somehow worse I don't know why all those musicians are quite talented obviously they're part of the fabric of American rock music so I would never really disparage them but would you rather that or the equally impressive musicianship of Limp Bizkit. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by our old dogs over at Squarespace. Jason, I spend every waking minute of my day surfing the World Wide Web. I'm looking at social media, but you know me, I'm old school. I'm still checking out websites, baby. I type in that URL, I click, I surf, I find information, I delete information.

14:37It never ends with the internet. And most of the best websites that I come across were built on Squarespace.

14:43Jason Stewart:Use Squarespace and their beautiful websites to do some crazy stuff. You have a vision and you want to build a website for your new crazy business or whatever. But you could also, you know, let's say your dog is having a gender reveal party and you just want to have a nice destination where there's a rich FAQ section and a place where people can donate and view the registry or maybe even your wedding. You know, we all need a wedding website. It's just a thing that has to happen. It's a thing that goes down. And why not make it look better than all of your friends' invitations and websites this year only on Squarespace?

15:19Shit on the homies using Squarespace. So go to squarespace.com slash howlong for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code howlong to save 10 % off your first purchase of a website or domain. This episode of How Long Gone is brought to us by our friends at Dart Collective. I think we can all agree that wedding music is typically quite lame, cheesy, and it doesn't represent the bride and groom's personal music taste. Luckily, Dart works with actual musicians and artists, many of whom have their own productive careers or tour in bands you've heard of. Everyone from Leon Bridges to Taylor Swift.

15:54Dart DJs use vinyl and are cool in a way that your peers would be, not a dated Carnival Cruise performer. They even have an in-house stylist to make sure all personnel look perfect on the day. Dart travels all over the world for events from Morocco to Italy, Greece, and the Maldives. Dart has done huge celebrity events and also intimate ones.

16:13Jason Stewart:Yeah, Chris, I am personally friends with Michael from Dart, and I have worked with them for years. I think the last time I did a big one, we did the Sweet Green wedding. they set up a beautiful booth for the you know for the ceremony just some cocktail music some vinyl some cool vibes and then they set up a whole big tent with a crazy bumping sound system for me to play in later these guys are great a lot of people always ask me like hey you know do cool wedding djs exist do cool event people exist the cool part about dart is they'll work with people like me to come and dj or party as well as provide all the gear and all the consulting and all the all that stuff so if you don't know who to hire for your event dart collective is the one dart just like throwing a dart dash collective.com and uh ask for mike his email address is michael at dart dash collective.com tell them we sent you uh so if you have an event coming up this summer dark collective is where you go that that limp biscuit corn is the worst thing you could like i would say and then jimmy hendrix janice joplin led zeppelin is second to that i i don't we can't put zeppelin in there they're too goaded i mean of course they're goaded but it's like i guess what i'm saying is this this kind of guy never was blueprint bro but there's but these guys Because everybody's arguing about...

17:45Jason Stewart:With no Zep, there'd be no Jack White. You know that, right? Yeah, that's kind of what I'm saying. What are we talking about here? No, but I think there's... But those kind of guys never... They never made it to Van Morrison or something. I'm like, what about the cool stuff that's not dissimilar to this? You know what I mean? But people hate the Rolling Stones now. I don't know if Van Morrison's cool. Van Morrison's three times as cool as fucking Jimi Hendrix. Three? At least. jimmy hendry it's not jimmy's fault it's not jimmy's fault it's it's it's the hot topic of vacation of that of that like i live i live on the third floor of my parents fucking five million dollar house and i have tapestries up and i burn i burn incense and i have an acoustic guitar but i also play fucking you know right tackle that's the kind of guy you know the kind of guy i'm talking about i also have my career set up for me in october after i get back from my backpacking trip yeah no i'm gonna go to i'm gonna go to asia with the homies and do a little sex tourism and float in a river and drink beer and then i'm gonna come back i'm gonna get to finally take over the family insurance business but it's it's classic classic rock is it's not i don't know whose fault it is man but it's just i mean leds i mean excuse me uh limp biscuit like that shit is obviously the worst like that's no question the worst well i only brought that up because they're having a huge renaissance they're oh i know festivals all over the world you know it's it's very it's interesting because they came before system of a down but i feel like system of a down paved the way for limp biscuit to come back and i think yeah because i think i think system of a down because of their uh culture and their race is they you have like a kind of a built-in audience for yourself like it never goes away when you're when you're sort of the heroes of a country and you've made it globally the audience never the audience sticks with you forever yeah the the the national national pride it's cool yeah exactly you're like the hometown pride it's cool but yeah when you're when you're limp biscuit why morrissey is so big in mexico exactly exactly like what is what is limp biscuit the pride of rochester i don't even i don't know anything about them i don't know where they're from i don't know anything about limp biscuit Why do you think that right now in 2026, people who were born in whatever, 2004, are just losing?

20:08Jason Stewart:They're like, this is the best. 20-year cycles, bro. It's just another. It's just been long enough, and it's different enough than what we have. I mean, I think that's the main thing is it's so different than what we have going on now. I'm a 15-year-old. I'm going to either listen to Ryan Betty or I'm going to listen to Limp Bizkit. It's like, you know, it's the choice. or biscuit the differences are are glaring oh betty in the streets biscuit in the sheets that's me baby uh but i also think it's i think it could also be part of the jorts propaganda because limp biscuit when i think of jorts i think of fred you know i i think of i think of fred yeah i also think it's a it's just problematic enough without actually being bad that it feels like dangerous to a dumbass you know the same way it did to our generation in some way i wonder if how much of it snuck in through irony like every i remember you know five ten years ago people would be like wearing limp biscuit shirts and like listening to them as a bit and it's like kind of ironic and i'm gonna you know wear my nookie hat on halloween and it was kind of funny and then just eventually were people like wait a minute well give me something to break i think there's I'm going to break your face tonight.

21:23Jason Stewart:You're like, wait a minute. This is. Hold on. This is Mozart. Hold on. These guys are kind of spitting, though. I mean, I think it really is just. I mean, I saw, you know, someone sent me. Like, people are selling Godsmack t-shirts for, you know, a couple hundred bucks. Like, that's embarrassing. Like, that is the worst shit on earth. Like, what are we talking? Like, the stain. I mean, like, stained. If he hadn't gone right wing. You're saying Luke got a Godsmack up there for$3.75, ready to go? Luke's definitely sold some God smacks to a rapper's fucking weed roller. Definitely. Something about the listening to something ironically and then having it absorb into your psyche and persona, sneaking in, Trojan horsing it in through irony of Creed.

22:09Jason Stewart:There's a lot of people who listen to Creed as a joke and then 10 years later they're like, Creed is the only music I like. Well, that Creed song, unfortunately, is an all-time smack. From a strictly song perspective, it's very, very good. Whereas Limp Bizkit, I can't really say that. You know what I mean? That Creed song, the reason that Creed song is viral with guys who have four Zins in their mouth at once is because it does get you pumped up. It does what it's supposed to do. Yeah, and whereas give it to the nookie and you can take my cookie and stick it up your what, that one moves you less emotionally and spiritually.

22:50I forgot about stick it up your what. That's such a good, clean version. That's so stupid. Yeah, you can stick it up your cookie. That's how big that song was. They were like, dude, do whatever you want. We got to get this shit. We got to get this shit on the radio tomorrow. Whatever you got to do.

23:05Jason Stewart:I saw somebody tweet about that. um i forgot what song it was but like when when when songs end up just like being like a dumb song like that but they end up being like generational smashes with billions of streams do do they look back and think like maybe i didn't oh it was party in the usa yeah yeah by miley like like it was like a fun summer song but now it's like you know written into our constitution basically and has been generated billions of dollars in revenue and she's saying nodding my head like yeah well there was other lyrics where you're like do you think if she knew that this song would get 3 billion streams on Spotify would we be a little more judicious about these throwaway lines here's the thing Jason I think that's what makes it great I think that's kind of what makes it great there were 12 people in the room you know what I mean and they all some of the greatest minds you know probably to ever ever touch the strat and they figured it out and that's why that song is so good and why it's and i mean i didn't hear it blaring for many you know cars last night but in certain parts of the world i'm sure it was okay and i i just it bums me out that everyone in the room all those 12 greatest songwriters in the in the planet wordsmiths lyricists modern day poets they're like nodding my head like yeah hey man if it works if it works let's print it well the thing about miley cyrus is she could she she can sing too well i think it i think it allows for worse lyric lyric like you're just like whatever dude if she her body's a prison she could sing to yeah like the woman who has 500 orgasms a day yeah you don't want this life i sing too well if she can sing like this it don't matter those gums she hits those high notes with those gums go ahead i had an encounter yesterday with a young man um who was uh pause you know when you go to these hotels and they have i'm at the delano and they have a beach access and you know the the there's the 17 year olds or whatever that set up your beach chair for you and you know you tip them they put the towel down sure and the guy i i had i had like i had to go do something and like alex was talking to him when i got back and this motherfucker was like a grailed reseller but he was like 15 or 16 and he was like he was but he was asking all these cool questions like to alex not understanding that she knew what he was talking about so he would just be like do you know do you what christian dior is you know and she'd be like yes and he'd be like do you know what grailed is and she was like yes and then he would like explain something but then he was like i really i really want to come to new york that's sick but then he started asking her about like how fashion shows work and he was like so so like do i get to keep the clothes like he's like when you're in the show do you get to keep the clothes and alex is like well i'm not in the show i'm not a model and then he goes yeah but let's say i'm in the show let's say i'm in the show do i get to keep the clothes and she was like say i was a model in the chrome hearts fashion show yeah that's do you think i get to keep the clothes man and alex was like no sorry that's not really how it works you know what i mean and he was talking about wanting to come to new york and well if you're famous enough and if you're kind of one of the plus size models they're afraid to say no you can't take it that's literally with it then but that's kind of about it exactly exactly if you're a jenner sure uh but the but then he was he was like yeah i really want to come to new york and you know it's like oh yeah new york's great he's like yeah i just really want to go to the supreme store i was like damn this is this day he was great he was really funny about it but Like I've never had one of those encounters where you talk to someone who thinks they know something.

26:24Like a child that is asking you questions. And you're like, I know anything you could possibly ask me. So I'm just going to let this go as long as I can to see where you take it.

26:33Jason Stewart:That's fun. It makes you feel like the old lion and the little lion cub is just learning how to walk and swim. And you're saying, oh, to be young and dumb again. But I would like to know how this convo started up. Was he trying to spit game at Alex? I think it was. It was like, hey, Ma, you ever heard of Christian Dior? You change your life. I'm only this many. He was like, I like the old jeans. And I'm like, yeah, you like the rock star skinnies, bitch. You weigh 100 pounds. I'm sure you do like them. It was giving Tim 15 years ago. I like your old jeans. Yeah. I don't think he was trying to spit game.

27:06I think he was actually, for a 16-year-old, very actually good at, like, hi, where are you from? Like normal shit. And then it comes up. But, I mean, God bless him.

27:16Jason Stewart:We got hope. Yeah. We got hope for the youth and people who have jobs are like, hey, I spend 18 hours a day on Grail. You know, that's my dream. But I also have a job in public where I have to interact with people and I get good at talking and I become a normal human. I think it's great. And all of my side money and all of my in all of my journeys and hotel stays. The best interactions I have are with staff members that are under 22. OK, like a valet that's home from college. surprised to know when he likes them young or like a kid like this where they're just like they're having fun with it they want to just soak up as much as they can and they make cash and they're happy like life hasn't life hasn't beaten them down yet they're just happy to be here they don't care it's 100 degrees it's all good they're excited to meet new and exciting people from all over the world they consider that to be a benefit that's nice and they're not afraid to talk to them they don't uh they don't that's the main thing like an ipad ipad psychosis or like yeah yeah they don't start bleeding from the nose when somebody asks them a question that's not yes or no where are you from um well i guess i guess we have to talk about this uh the the swift wedding i mean you know it's been happening all weekend and unfortunately how could we not how did we go 25 minutes without bringing it up well because the edging is real because unfortunately it is even worse than we could have anticipated i think that is this about to be a four-hour app i feel it i was giving her i was i was giving her the benefit of the doubt incorrectly and i want to apologize to you and the listeners for that because i should have known better okay this is in reference to you claiming that this was all uh a distraction from and she's not actually going to go through with the wedding at msg or are you talking about something else mainly that mainly that but mainly that i was wrong and and it does everything i've seen you didn't put any money on it did you no no no god no but all of the all of the blurry pictures that i've seen on you know the daily mail and and other assorted you know gossip newsletters and instagram accounts that i i look at it is it's darker than we could have ever imagined and i just don't even understand jason like i don't have the capacity for being this corny this corny where do we begin it's okay so i mean i'm i'm seeing the the decor being wheeled in and out and like the people are comparing it to you know whatever trump is doing to the white house the you know the the design and the decor and all they have their own they have their own bad as you can get they have their own logo that looks sort of like a you know like a public golf course level kind of logo like a lockup we're talking about the t the t and t yes the t and t lock up it kind of looks like uh dennis rodman's new fucking soju line it's just it's just not i mean i i just i guess the whole thing with her and this has always been the case but you know she's got access to the greatest of anything you know there's no amount of money that that she couldn't spend you know i i'm not saying which is a handicap yeah i think it is in this case because i mean i get it you don't want to go get fucking eric wren to do typography for this you're not that you know what i mean but it's like also like what do you what i guess now i'm imagining what the good version would have been and i can't even get my head around that well the thing is we can't have like the nobody would enjoy this the the world would stop spinning if taylor swift had a tasteful awesome wedding it just isn't right it just things the world would just shut down i don't know what it is like you know like when i saw olivia nuzzy is dating shane smith from vice like if this didn't happen the world wouldn't be well i love i love that i think that is that like shit like that has to happen that's true love this is true i mean those two crazy fucking kids i want them to do a little kind of leaving las vegas style romance there's got to be gun gun sex every day not even not just on the weekends guns guns on the table every day i believe the love of shane smith and olivia nuzzi much more than i believe the love of taylor swift and travis kelsey nuzzi i know you're listening back come back on the pod whenever you want babe no i'm good on that i'm on that but i thought i think that their love i think their love is real and i i'm glad they that that was put out by page six on taylor swift's wedding weekend like true experts they probably probably got better engagement than beyonce's new song oh beyonce's song flop y 'all gotta defend that shit somebody find somebody tried to defend that we've been saying anyway the wedding um flopping like a quesadilla the guest list is also like a little bit like do you ceo of amc movie theaters needed to be there bro come on well no he i think this is the thing I think it's like, oh, you really don't have real friends.

31:58Right, right, right. Like, you don't have, like, I mean, of course, you've been famous too long. Like, you know what I mean? You've been famous too long. You don't have the homie from middle school. I mean, maybe you do. I'm sure there are a few there. But when you invite a thousand people to a wedding and we got, like, exactly the AMC CEO. We got every basketball player, football player. We have all your, you know, your competitors that you want to see die, but you invite them as a chess move.

32:22Jason Stewart:Oh, the Camila Cabellos. it's just that camille wasn't there unfortunately um she's on a boat somewhere with that ass out uh chris was dunk watching trust me she wasn't at msg i was i was donk watching but yeah i don't know man it's it's it's just like i gotta say i did see jason sudeikis he looked great i gotta give it up to antonoff great tuxedo saw a picture of him okay great tuxedo rachel or jack uh jack look great um i i just you know man i just they wore dior they wore custom dior which is like of course if you get the call and you're jonathan harrison no matter what you think of you know mom donnie's taylor swift playlist you have to do this you know what i mean j dubs is has some taylor in his playlist or is it different kind of gay different kind of gay different kind of i think so as well i i think that you get that call and you obviously you're going to do it it's like pretty i'm sure it's insane what's his nationality uh i think he's irish really yeah i think so yeah i think so um yeah northern irish yeah i think he's i thought so but i mean like i think jonathan anderson is a true like kind of you know genius like central saint martin's freak gay like he's he's definitely gonna listen to confessions too you know with the homies but he's not taylor i think stuff like that you know i only listen to death grips i mean that might be that i'm just saying i don't think he's one of those gays who's like i love taylor swift or like oh my god carly ray jepson you know what i mean he came up and went in the heady discipline where he's got to be you know he's my interpole and things like that i would like to think he's because he's british they have a better you know it's like he might know the the lyrics to several libertine songs before he would know taylor swift songs yeah yeah i see that with those blue eyes you kidding me yeah um i was observing all the all the guests and celebs and the people who have met taylor one time at a party four years ago who are all coming and tapping the ring it kind of has a like a dictatorship kind of energy where like you kind of gotta go like kind of like the the bezos wedding or you know the ufc at the ufc at the white house like we're a little iffy on it maybe but just like i just gotta go to see what this is like and i got invited and i just kind of gotta go but i feel like it was really you know you see like the met galas and the oscars and all these big things with uh you know the quote-unquote service gays and girls you know the pr stylist assistants hair makeup all that stuff guys who hold the umbrellas for celebrities like this was really their olympics this is the world cup of service gays every single person's persons were all here at msg and they were all showing out and that's the to me that's the real story that's i want to see the veep show about the service gays at taylor's wedding i mean i want to know the people who got executed out back for like you know getting caught leaking a picture that were serving chicken you know and they got their executed they got their lives threatened by some fucking giant guy with a gun, you know.

35:27Jason Stewart:To the security guard who gave the leftover Krispy Kremes to some homeless guy outside, just put a red dot in his forehead out back. You signed the paperwork, bitch. They tackle him. I mean, I think that the, yeah, I mean, I think the guest list does, it just feels like, and this is to be expected, I think, a wedding of these guys. Either you go insane private, there's 20 people here, or you just make it a full business expense and decision. Then that's what this is. They had a full film crew, like professionally filming it, which they're claiming is going to be given out as a gift to their wedding guests.

36:02It's like, bitch, I don't want a video of your fucking wedding. Who's going to watch a video? No one watches a video of their own wedding. Who the fuck is going to watch a video of someone else's wedding? Like, that's insane. That level.

36:14Jason Stewart:I would say there's a lot of people want to watch that video and none of them were invited to the wedding. Exactly. Everyone who wasn't invited. And maybe that's part of her little dark game. and then I'm going to send you this video and if you leak it, if you leak as so much as five seconds of this video, I'm going to be so far up your ass. But I wouldn't be surprised if there was a theatrical release of this later or something. People are saying it has because they're filming it, they're able to get the crazy permits and shut the streets down and shut everything down. Oh, if that makes sense.

36:43I mean, I do think there's a lot of 4D chess going on to get something like this done, but if this sees release, that's

36:50Jason Stewart:one of the that's going to be one of the darkest things in american history i agree i mean it does seem like she doesn't have that many friends but you know i you you look at taylor's wedding and you look at um lana's wedding you know 30 people in the swamp it's a celebration of two people and not like you said a business write-off and a filming opportunity and some type of eyes wide shut ritual ceremony i wish it was that cool i wish it was that cool we all do it was so tight that like nothing even nothing cool came out of this you know what i mean there's no video of like i don't know it's like you see all these celebrity weddings like whatever dua lipo and callum turner like you saw stuff that was like funny and cool you know what i mean it's like oh yeah this happened or so and so was there that's funny this is just like oh this this ortega fell you know we all had a lot yeah exactly exactly this is no it's not that escalate is the one behind you you gotta read the license this is literally like uh an award show that's what this feels this feels like the vmas yeah and i i read that apparently their vows were 20 minutes each so that means this is a oh my god there had to have been an intermission because well it took 20 it took 20 it took 20 minutes because travis kelsey can't read too good but other than that do you think that he had like a teleprompter or in-ear?

38:11Jason Stewart:No, I'm sure. Feeding him lines? I'm sure he had, I mean, yes, or just straight up cards. He can't, if he really can't read too good, then, you know, the cards in front of him aren't going to help. You know, the... Well, Jason, luckily... Three pages printed out, it's not going to do much for him. It'll, it's, look, it's your own wedding. Nobody can say shit to you. It ain't the ESPYs. You can't get roasted by fucking Bill Maher. You know what I mean? This is straight up like, this is your people trying his best yeah they can't make for they can't make funny also yeah your teammates already know what you're good at you bought them a rolex you bought them all rolexes last season everybody's got to be nice do you think it's cruel to make travis publicly speak for 20 minutes i do actually i do feel like because i feel like it's one of those things where if he doesn't match what she wants to do then he looks like he loves her less you know what i mean so you gotta you gotta sort of she it's her fault actually for making him do that But I'm sure this is one of the many things she's made him do.

39:09Jason Stewart:This is all her fault, bro. Come on. I haven't talked to anybody. Look what you made me do. I haven't talked to anybody that went yet. I'm going to start some outreach tomorrow. Once the holiday weekend's over, I'll get some real tea. Yeah, I was talking to Max yesterday. And I was like, you know people who went to this wedding. Like, what's the tea? And he's like, I know. But like, how much time do you give it? And how do you bring it up? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You can't look too thirsty. But, you know, between you and I, we probably know, whatever, a dozen or so people who went to this wedding, at least.

39:44Jason Stewart:They want to tell everyone. They can't tell everyone. Are we going to get people who are voices and faces are pixelated and doing reports on what, you know, is somebody going to get paid half a million dollars to spill all the tea under, you know, secrecy? Is that possible? The thing is, Jason, the thing is, Jason, I think it's, I don't know why I have this gut feeling that like nobody really cares that much. Like, you know what I mean? I think it's like people care. I think the speculation leading up to it is better than what actually happened. Like I think that because nothing happened. Like everything in life.

40:21It's like the most dorky celebrities at a place we've all been before drinking 1942 in a Cinderella castle. Like I don't even care what happened. like if that's what happened i don't need to know that's that's all i need to know you know what i