983. - Chris & Jason

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23:08Jason Stewart:Again, that is square, S-Q-U-A-R-E dot com slash howlong. Start with Square and build a setup that grows with your business. ain't no belkin in this house it's got to be apple oen no we don't shit okay so i'm looking at the i'm looking at the the power adapter it's like a little square wreck it used to be kind of sitting more vertical now it's kind of landscape and it's got the two usbcs in it and the two pronger it's going in uh it's nice that we have two instead of three back in the old day when that uh that laptop cable had the three prongs yes yes yeah well half inch thick heavy you try to wind it up can't wind it i forgot about that but yeah anyway this is from the streets we got it out the band okay so yeah i mean there i would say at this point with something as simple as a brick adapter it's something that you can buy aftermarket from a third party and the quality level will be fine especially considering how often we're replacing these and you know this is no i know this is my mental illness i absolutely i know a hundred percent that i can go on amazon and get something that will work perfectly um but i just can't you know what i mean you're loyal to the brand and i think that's awesome not not one belkin not one anchor i unfortunately even though they make a great accessory i unfortunately do have an anchor micro sd reader uh for to do this podcast and i actually it's actually it took a lot for me to admit that on the microphone um but i couldn't find one i'm so glad that i shared because it made you share it made me shit i mean yeah i'm uh i i was gonna this happened because i was you know when my last recorder shit the bed and i bought all this stuff i was in sag harbor with my in-laws and i just need to get it done and i didn't feel like you know summer was we were just getting over the sag harbor with my in-laws i just need to get it we were getting it has like a little role model feel if it was cape cod it would be a role model lyric but i was i was trying to i didn't want to bother you with i bothered you enough and i was like i'm not gonna ask jason to go to apple.com right now and see if they have a micro sd reader um but i i imagine that they do and if several people are gonna let me know uh that they do the harbor changed you i just didn't i didn't want to you know i feel like i ask you a lot of technical questions and it's easy for you to answer so you don't mind but i don't like to bog you down well chris you know my my type me being such a virgo i get delighted when i get to put my genius bar hat on for you okay for anyone but for you as well because it's like oh finally somebody recognizes how uh techie i am which i guess when i say it out loud is not really something i should be excited about if i need to go if i need to go like j ellis if i need real shit answered i go to j because that's like a different love that's a different level but for everyday questions no one does it better than you no one does it better than you i would love to know what an example of a real question i just i just mean jake i feel like if i asked jay how to like oh my my outlet at my house isn't working he would get on facetime and show me how to fix it you know what i mean like it's where i could do it but he will he will get there with with much more ease and i will get there where i'm sort of pretending like i know and sort of googling it on off the side on my on my ipad that i have just out of screen just to get it done so you're wise to do something with that and it's a good example it makes sense but i yeah i just i something needs to happen here but i will i'll check the apple.com uh website after this is over and and see what i can what i can get into and see yeah apple's not gonna have the extendo yeah it's funny because you go to some hotels and you're like oh this one has they have the they got the usbc on here so i don't know that's that's happening a lot that's happening a lot more that happened at the zetter in london that happened at the rosewood in london it's happening more and more which is cool but it's just interesting to see how long it takes for people to make the switch over.

26:59Jason Stewart:And Apple always is sort of the first one to do it. They're always the one where they're like, what if your computer didn't have a fucking plug at all? And you're like, well, I need some plugs. It'd be nice if I had a thing. Yeah, it's like, you know that people use these to work, right? It's not just aesthetically pleasing. We got to plug shit into it. What if your phone had no button at all? I mean, I'm excited. It was kind of cool. I'm not going to front. I'm excited for a foldable iPhone. I'm going to check it out. I'm not saying I'm going to buy it, but I'm going to check it out. You trying to fold it like Ish?

27:26I'm trying to get, yeah, I'm folded like Kehlani. I'm folded like Kehlani. Because I remember years ago during COVID, Tom Brown did a collaboration with Samsung and they sent it to me and it was a foldable Samsung. And I was like, well, I can't use a Samsung. But the feeling of folding it was so gratifying. Like the shutting of the phone like you would with a Razr felt so good. is like closing a Porsche door that I was like, man.

27:55Jason Stewart:The rest is still unwritten. Yeah, okay, yeah. The Porsche door, the sound of the sidekick whipping around and clicking into place. Oh, my God. Clean up on aisle me. I'm going to get chubbed. Yeah, I mean, I remember that as well, and I may have DJed an activation at the Hollywood and Highland Mall when that Samsung, and I remember I had to create a Samsung account for the day so I could post the Instagram story posted from the Samsung device. And I remember even back then, I was like, these motherfuckers got... The camera is so good. It's so much better than the iPhone. I remember that. But then I still remember like, still not good enough.

28:38Doesn't matter. Yeah, it doesn't matter. I mean, that's the...

28:40Jason Stewart:No shade to the Samsung family. No, I mean, I think the folding phone does give us a gratification that we're looking for. And it's possible that the world is so because you know i'm seeing brands posting stuff now where like the model is using you know sort of like a 2000s sport over you know headphone with a ipad or excuse me with a with a ipod mini or whatever like i'm seeing a lot of a lot of that creatively like like the y2k nano aesthetic yeah like yes yellow disc man yes exactly like post sport disc man but like same kind of vibe and i I wonder... I had so many MP3 players. You had a Zune, right?

29:18Because you probably got one for free.

29:19Jason Stewart:I had a Zune. I remember a friend of the show, Paul Chang pulled up to my house in Silver Lake in the Zune fully skinned and branded Toyota FJ Cruiser, the one that has the little snorkel on the front, which is a very expensive collector's item car now. Insane. I was going to say, I feel like that's one of those cars that no longer exists. Kanye is going to have a fleet of them and Matt Black in the next five years. But I remember that Zune came out and I was like, this is some bullshit. But everyone had to get into it. And it was kind of fun to use each MP3 player. It's fun to learn a new operating system for it.

29:59I don't think I ever had an MP3 player except for an iPod. I don't think I ever dabbled in the other ones

30:04Jason Stewart:because there were some rudimentary ones that preceded the iPod. but yeah i had i had most of them i remember because my brother was so deep on the uh with a mini disc back then your brother had a mini disc if i can use he had a he had a mini disc player which had a built-in like high quality recorder yeah which also had built-in like send and return like audio inputs and he i remember he recorded uh a show he just sent me the files like uh like a few weeks ago elliot smith and granddaddy at the will turn oh wow okay oh 2002 or something like that. I always forget that your brother is the ghost.

30:44I always forget that your brother is the ghost. And sometimes they be reminded.

30:47Jason Stewart:He had a mini disc recording of, and I could be wrong on the exact details, but Greek theater, Radiohead, live recording. Literally no ticket to the show. Climb in a tree in the hills to record. See, that's why. Look, that's the commitment I'm looking for from my fellow heads. You know what I mean? that's actually that's amazing the interesting part of of how this amazing you know it has it has it's like a part of our life and that's how old we are but when i tell these stories it feels like train hopping in the 60s to see the dead you know what i mean like it has that level of whatever a fantasy and throw back throw it back at it isms but he was like what in a way to um weave that into modern technology he's like i have these files these which i recorded you know just standing in the middle of the yeah of the wheel turn while ellie i remember elliot smith did uh don't fear the reaper wow that he did a cover of that um and he's like can can we use some like ai plug-in technology to like get these up to stuff digitize and remaster and i was like that's actually one of the maybe only interesting good parts of of ai audio restoration of course you know fixing some stuff that needs to be but like you could take an old ass recording and instead of like hiring some crazy guy that you can't afford to have it you know remastered and read whatever you know you can get it that's i mean you know recently i was uh i was doing an interview with uh i got this guy chris gaiamali and he pulled out the teenage engineering like recording device.

32:30Oh, the little recording. That shit is so cool. I was like, this is cool as for hell. And he was like, yeah, this thing is like, he's like, it really helps when you're interviewing people because it immediately breaks the ice because people are like, what is that? He's like, you know what T-Engineering is and you'd never seen this.

32:44Jason Stewart:Jacob Bellorti's like, man, that's cool. But I'd never seen it before. And it looks so, obviously, most people just use their iPhone. Real reporters use the old school Dictaphone. The T-Engineering feels somewhere in between because it is aesthetically pleasing, but it's also old school in the way that it works. Yeah, and it makes you wonder, like, who is the most that device to pull it out to where if you pull it out to interview this person, it won't feel strange at all. It'll be a completely frictionless, you know, like if you pull it out in front of Cameron Winter, will he not even, you know what I mean?

33:19You know who wouldn't? Pattinson. Known beat maker, hip-hop head, musician Robert Pattinson,

33:25Jason Stewart:wouldn't even he wouldn't flinch and he's cool enough to where he won't geek out on and be like oh is that the the 300 yeah is that the 320 f yeah yeah that one's cool he'll just clock it and that's it it's not big dick energy it's nice looking dick it's nice it's nice good dick regular good dick energy that's what we get that's what we should aim for big dick energy has been overhyped let's just go for regular normal dick energy it's better yeah yeah they talk about size in shape don't sleep on shape you know what i'm saying size is cool but don't don't sleep don't sleep now do not nice shape no that'll do something for you damn i'll do something for you you got a handsome dick we should talk about you wait handsome okay hold on this is funny that you brought this up because this came up the other night at a dinner because i didn't bring up i just said the words handsome dick but go ahead well a a a woman a woman said emily dawn long said that she liked being called handsome and i thought to myself i've heard handsome couple you know to refer to a couple uh a you know a dual gender in our mind in the public opinion handsome couples as far as we go yeah but i didn't i don't know if that would actually work in the real world you know i i don't know if you could go up to a a non-stud like a just a regular batty and be like yo you're handsome as hell i don't think that would you mean you mean a solo female not yeah yes i'm saying have you ever said you guys make a handsome couple to a couple i haven't but people have said that to me and i've clocked it as something i should say because i like i do like the way that sounds it does feel like i hear it all the time when people are talking to me but i've never really seen no no i've no no i don't have to really say it out loud i don't i I just don't hear people say it that often is what I'm, it's something that it's quite rare.

35:14Jason Stewart:I feel like I've, I've probably said it three times in my life just because, you know, just to amuse myself, see what happens kind of thing. Not, and I mean, does anyone ever say you guys make a handsome couple in 2026 without it being sort of a performative experiment? But, um, I've never heard, it's an interesting take from, from Emily. It's, I like it. And I don't know of handsome, like what exactly does handsome mean? Like the etymology of the word. I don't have those kind of answers bro you think I'm a fucking professor well I was only sort of posing the question in real time as I figure it out on the internet just for our audience they might know better than we do if I'm keeping it a buck around so how did you feel about her saying I don't like being called handsome as a female I think that I also got in trouble for saying female but that's a different story not from her from a narc but I think that I think that it's like anything else and we talk about this a lot, if you deliver it the right way, it's understood to be a compliment.

36:12Jason Stewart:Okay, handsome. It comes from the word hand and some. I hope you're sitting down. Its original meaning has little to do with physical attractiveness, the hand body part associated with handling control and skill, and some in English suffix meaning characterized by or tending to. In Middle English, it means, quote-unquote, easy to handle, convenient, or handy, which then changed to skillful and capable, then appropriate or well-proportioned. pleasing in appearance and then finally now it means attractive i mean in that case then it sounds like free game it sounds like you could call i mean that description is non-binary yeah because if you if you walk up to a woman and say like hey you know you're really hot but you also look easy to manage is is a woman going to be complimented by that or is she going to say like what is that supposed to mean i mean oh well that's tough i think most women want to be i think most women would prefer to be seen as difficult they would they would no yeah i think so i think there's a lot of women out there who who would pride themselves on being quote-unquote easy to manage you know compared to their competition out there in the on the dating world but it's not necessarily something that you would want to say out loud and put into the yeah into the discourse you know what i mean yeah yeah i get that i was just surprised i was just i'd never heard that discussed before and it was an interesting wrinkle uh because i i don't i still don't think i would feel comfortable saying it not because it would be taken uh offensively but just because i think it would be more confusing than anything else i mean if if women are allowed to say like hey you know he's he's xyz but he's got a good job you know i mean they're allowed to say that we're we're able to say you know she's xyz but she's easy to manage easy to manage i guess it is giving employee you know i well it's also like it's there's no one that there's no woman that is easy to manage that's the thing it's just it's it's a it's a fallacy from the the gig from the from the get-go there's no women that are easy to manage debate me yeah please charlie kirk shit i like it i dare you bro uh i dare you um all right we should okay so so how yeah we were we were about to talk to some uh we're about to talk about something until we got on our handsome shit I just, well, I think we should talk about the Ghanies because they were just announced this morning, which is our award show that is taking place in New York City at 915 at Racket, which is the old Highline Ballroom in Chelsea.

38:33Jason Stewart:915 as in September 15th, not PM. Yeah, September 15th, 7 PM actually. But I'm very excited that this thing is out into the world because I feel like we've been talking about it for a long time. And like all great things, it started out as a joke after Las Culturistas paved the way. As usual, straight men are coming behind and doing our thing. And we said, what if there was Las Culturistas Awards but for guys like us? But for guys like us. And we've been Brad Cook, who's an old friend of ours, an incredible musician in his own right and producer. he's put together a all-star house band who is going to kind of keep the show moving but also back up you know several uh performances from special guests that we're not really allowed to announce because of you know radius clauses and shit like that but i i think all of them but one have been on the show yeah you know we can't that's not that doesn't really narrow it down that much um but i will say one of 700 different let's let's say this if you like let's say if you like music like me then you should buy a ticket to this show even if you hate us uh because it will can it will at least get you'll get your money's worth just from performances alone i i would say will there be covers probably that are unique will should we record them on my brother's minidisc player probably we should we should yeah we can release this on jeg jaguar minidisc recording untouched un unedited jake can do uh don't fear the reaper i've i am sure jake can do don't fear the reaper um but yeah so we jake who i'll never tell we're getting our we're getting our categories in order we have several um i think that you know some are obvious uh you know kind of classic you know uh best dressed you know etc etc but then we have some we do have some categories um i would say fake chef of the year feels pretty you know authentic to how long gone Yeah, there is not a fake chef killing it in 2026 who we have not discussed.

40:38Exactly. So we have several categories. Hopefully, a lot of our nominees, they'll be notified. Hopefully, they'll be in town. But yeah, please hold the date. We're looking forward to it. It's the day after my birthday. So I'll be freshly 44 delivering these awards.

40:56Jason Stewart:Yes, and also, it's the week when New York is the most alive, which is why we really chose that date, as well as it being piggybacking your B-Day, but US Open, Fashion Week. It's going to be a who's who of everyone that's in town, and you can pull it up on itsvariety.com. That's the website, right? Emily, Feed Me just talked about it as well just seconds ago, so we're getting the word out. we're getting the word out this morning it's going to be like a kind of half VIP friends and fam guest list vibe and then half tickets open to the pub it is almost sold out already which is great news for us I feel awesome about that but I don't know are we going to do we'll do a late show just kidding yeah I don't know late show for me is 7 o 'clock we're already doing a late show How would that work exactly?

41:55Jason Stewart:And I think we're going to maybe film some of it if those of our listeners who are not going to be able to make it. So it'll be something that we can all enjoy virtually as well. I'm excited. I'm looking forward to it. I'm looking forward to it as well. To be clear, we're not streaming it. We're not. We ain't doing all that. That requires too much camera stuff. We're not streaming it. But you'll be able to digest the content. Our clip farm will make quick work of it, but we won't be streaming it live. We'll have 10 guys with camelbacks on somewhere fucking clipping backstage and they'll be able to get, it's going to smell weird in there, but they're going to get it done.

42:32Jason Stewart:And we pretty much have all the categories lined up and some really awesome, amazing sponsors. But if you represent a brand or a company that has a lot of money to spend and you would like to have your own category, you know, give us a call. We're not above it. The categories are for sale. Right now we got Marshall, we got Meta, you know we got we're good uh meta threads carpet we're we're working on finding the host now it's going to be somebody interesting though the threads carpet is going to be nice i'm just glad that we don't have to do that it's cool that we i was like oh somebody else gets to do that it feels weird but i know it's right it's like who who cleans up at the janitor's birthday party right if you've ever blamed that pesky bloated feeling on getting older or just being so busy or maybe that late night burrito, Jason, it might be worth getting a clear answer on what the real culprit is.

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44:20$50 off your first at-home test kit at tinyhealth.com slash how long. That's tinyhealth.com slash how long for$50 off. tinyhealth.com slash how long. BetterHelp, you already know what time it is. You've heard us on How Long Gone talk about BetterHelp for eons. I don't know that we've ever actually talked about how much people love this service when they use it. You don't have to take Jason's word for it. You don't have to take Chris's word for it. You can check out yourself at betterhelp.com slash reviews, and you can see what the customers are saying in real time. The reviews are updated every day with hundreds of people saying how much they love BetterHelp and how helpful it's been to them.

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44:57Jason Stewart:That's right, Chris. BetterHelp therapists have at least three years and 1 ,000 hours of hands-on experience, all the required education and training and certifications. Just answer a few questions online, get matched with a therapist based on your personal needs and switch therapists at any time if it's not the right fit. So see the reviews, see what stands out, and see if BetterHelp is right for you. Visit BetterHelp.com slash how long. That is Better, H-E-L-P, as in PrinceOfWales.com slash how long. Damn, bro. I never thought about it like that. But yeah, thank you guys for buying the tickets already.

45:35Buy them if they're still available, and we'll see you there on September 15th.

45:39Jason Stewart:And also, during that week, I'll be in town. There's a few fashion events. shout out to our chanel family uh but on the 12th chris and i are going to bop up to our old favorite stomping grounds of north in toronto there's going to be a little outdoor kind of wine related block party kind of dj dj thing going on uh that will be announced i guess i don't know i guess it's sort of being announced now even though we're not saying the name of it but um You know, we'll pump that on the social media. So if you're in Toronto on September 12th and you want to drink orange wine on a sidewalk while I DJ music, let's pull up.

46:25Jason Stewart:And Chris will be there as well. What's better than summer in Toronto? It's a How Long Gone Takeover. A summer in Toronto. Oh, baby. Oh, my goodness. With a bottomless bucket of orange offerings. Oh, that's crazy. And hopefully those are local. Should we crack another one, Brad? Hopefully those are local Ontario wines. I would hope they're from the local. Certainly, Christopher, certainly. Hopefully they're from the local region. Yeah, so I don't know what's going to happen other than me DJing. I'm sure there's going to be lots of cool food and drinks and drugs and all that good stuff. Maybe Chris and I will.

46:57Jason Stewart:Is there a local poutinerie that we can design a custom poutine for the night? I don't know what it's going to be. Tempeh and sprouts probably with some tofu curds. God, poutine. even though it's a Montreal thing, it really is a disease that has infected the world. What a disgusting, it's really, it's one of the most, even though America is considered the fattest, you know, most slovenly people, I feel like, I feel like poutine takes Canada to number two, just with that, like just take Tim Hortons out of it. Poutine as a thing is, is one of the most fat boy items on earth. Canada is technically in the Americas.

47:36Jason Stewart:So no, I, of course, but it's its own country you know it's obviously so it's its own country and its own people but you know i'm sure you know down in maine tucker's uncle has probably tangled with some something similar to a poutine you know what is a border i don't see any borders but that has me thinking i'm good i'm going to be in dublin at the end of the month in a few weeks and i've i've got my my site set on the spice bag yeah which is basically you know asian poutine through the lens of the whitest people alive what so it's a spice it's a bag of fries with spices or is there something i'm missing it's it's like a fast food you know late night drunken snack usually in like a literal bag like a like a brown paper sack it's it's basically you get you know french fries or chips as they call them over there maybe a little thicker cut you know uk style chip yeah they put like chili seasoning you know seasoning salt all over it and then they put toppings like you know chicken or meats or whatever onions chilies peppers and then they usually have or not usually but oftentimes they'll have a side of like a curry sauce okay and then sometimes you dip dip the fries and the chicken and the whatever in the sauce or you just pour rip the bag open and pour the curry sauce all over it and eat it kind of like a like a poutine i guess let me ask a question i saw i saw i think jay lee was posting about this when he was i think he was there yeah but my question my question to you is when you rip the bag and and do you are you you're using a fork or using your hands this is a this is a hands situation no not for me i mean i i obviously like you can go bring it home and eat it with a knife and fork or whatever but that's embarrassing i think it's the kind of thing like you're you're outside the pub and you you know you and your mates you know all tuck into the spice bag i just i just find that to be also i've never been there maybe they use a chopstick i don't know yeah yeah i'm sure they use a chopstick um i'm just afraid i'm afraid of what that would do to my hand it does sound very messy i'm afraid wiping that curry sauce all over the front of your new product shirt it just it just feels like something that is like you could wash your hands for two days and the smell still is not going to come out.

49:54That's my issue. Got it. I know exactly what you mean. It looks delicious. It looks delicious. At that restaurant I like in Dime Square called Tolo, they do fries in a bag with seaweed and some other spices, and they're so fucking good. I think about them all the time, but I do feel like it's kind of an Asian twist on that now that you're saying this.

50:14Jason Stewart:When you said fries in a bag with seaweed, I was like, bro, that sounds disgusting, but we're talking about the little dried furikake flakes and not yeah it's so it's so they're so good i think about them all the time like it's it's just because i've never had anything like well there's we got to get you some some nice artisan furikake i'll get some sent over through the my japanese diaspora websites there's oh yeah i remember there it's like literally like furikake.org or something like that but i i got this furikake that were the little had these little tiny flakes that were snoopy wow snoopy's head mixed in with like the are you sure that are you sure that chris chang didn't make these himself and deliver them to you are you sure i don't remember where i saw it but i just ordered it i mean i think they have them at um that h mart as well that's cool but i really feel like i ordered them from straight up for a cocky.org or something but yeah it's just a little pack of for a cocky and then there's little tiny snoopy heads mixed in with all the seasonings put it over your yummy rice oh yeah that sounds that's That does sound delicious.

51:15I have to say.

51:15Jason Stewart:They probably come in regular as well as spicy. Now I'm starting to think about shisho. So you're getting me down a dark path, Jason. Thank God. I love shisho leaf. Uchi boys are up. I do love it. And I think about it a lot. And I don't really get it that often. But it's something I think about. I will admit. I'm sure Flynn, if you say, hey, could you do me a nice kind of Cape Cod scallop and shisho? I can't say shiso anymore because of the way you say it. No, you got to say shiso. Yeah, yeah. You got to say it wrong. You got to say it wrong. You got to say it wrong. Yeah, if you don't say it wrong, you're not saying it right, is what I would say.

51:57Jason Stewart:So true. And if you have to explain it, it ain't going to happen. Actually, speaking of Asian food, I was listening to some pods this morning as I was doing some chores, just spraying the driveway down with a hose or whatever it is I'm doing. and I was like, let me see what David Chang's talking about it. And there was his episode. It was like 20 minutes long, not counting commercials, and I'm sure it was probably 18 to 13 minutes of actual content. And the episode was entitled, Do You Wash Your Feet? And it was him and two other guys asking if they wash their feet in the shower. Bro. And I'm like, bro, this guy has a netflix deal and then and then as soon as i finished listening to that i was like joe budden deserves all the money dude like they're they're they're good dude they're really good well i was saying somebody was telling me that there was because i was like i've never listened to bill simmons i don't care about bill simmons i don't care about the ringer that's just not my thing and i think it was jake gallagher was like dude he just did an episode recently where he talked about how he doesn't ever wear a seat belt see that now i'm now i'm kind of bad And I was like, shit, that's so good.

53:10I was like, that's fucking A-plus stuff. I was like, I got, I completely, that one, finding out that one small fact about Bill Simmons made me, I was like, that's too good. That, and when he interviewed Ben Affleck when he was pilled out, when he had the HBO show for a month, those are the only two things I know about Bill Simmons, and I like them both a lot.

53:30Jason Stewart:Yeah, Bill, I guess Bill, now that you think about it, now that I think about it, he is kind of dark woke. like he he leans you know he leans pretty left democratic but he has a he has a dark side that's underneath him that's kind of only really coming out just because of his age like he's old enough he's been doing it long enough to where he's like maybe i'll say some stuff that a lot of people are going to disagree with and i don't really give a shit i don't really wear which only comes with age just say you don't wear this it's just so cool it's so stupid it's just there's no like And I was trying to think about it.

54:04I was like, maybe his approach is like, people say it's better to get in an accident when you're drunk because your body's so relaxed. I heard that as a justification for drunk driving.

54:13Jason Stewart:Or like, if I was wearing my seatbelt, I would have been dead in that burning car. Thankfully, I was flung out of the window. I broke every bone. Away from this explosion. But that's the way the logic used to be. With NASCAR and F1 racing, it was like no seatbelt. You have to be flung from the car because every time it crashes, it explodes into a fireball, you know, early time. Well, I mean, let's not forget, you could get decapitated by the seatbelt as well, depending on impact. Bro, the seatbelt is so dangerous. Seatbelt is the original vaccination. How often do you... Do you think when people...

54:46Jason Stewart:They're like, yeah, my uncle died in a car accident last week and they just said, belted? Exactly. Oh, I bet he was belted. Huh, well... Probably belted, huh? That's something to think about. That's something to think about. They got us belting on the airplane? Fuck out of here, bro. I don't... Do you put a seatbelt on in an Uber? Yes, yes, yes. I try to, but I often don't. The only time I don't put a seatbelt on is when I'm in Manhattan. Yeah. Also, I guess... Because the speeds are never really reached. I guess the response was somebody asked him, like, what do you do about the beeping? And he was just like, if you wait long enough, it stops.

55:20Jason Stewart:That's true. And it depends on the car. But also in Glendale, all of my bros, all of my Yukons and Escalades and et cetera, They all had a guy disable the beep. That's the first thing you do when you get the car. I remember one of my friends made a little money. Do you remember that Dodge that was during the Charger era, but it was kind of a wagon? Do you remember that car? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What was it called? I can't remember what it was called. But he went on YouTube and figured out the way to disable the seatbelt beep. And I was like, wow, that feels like a lot of work to turn that off. when it's meant to save your life, I guess.

56:02That felt like a bridge too far for me.

56:03Jason Stewart:I know. I mean, I feel like there's a lot of things that people do with cars or bicycles or other things where you just say, like, oh, I'm going to take the reflectors off my bike. That shit's fucking, makes me look like a pussy. All my friends are going to make fun of me if I were. But disabling the seatbelt in your car, the sound that it makes, that's a next level of dedication to just sort of ignorant manhood and masculinity, which I also kind of like. I like people who are like, seatbelts are, it's a little too fruity. I don't enjoy it. I'll take my chances with death. It just feels like a cool thing that's coming back around.

56:43It is coming back around.

56:44Jason Stewart:It's like - I thought I would never hear it. Yeah, we're not going to push back about free speech or abortion rights or anything like that, but seatbelts, that's something I'm going to get behind. do you think at some point because bill simmons has hundreds of millions of dollars and and millions of of audience members do you think he had a thing in his mind where he's like i'm about to say i'm gonna i'm about to publicly take my anti-seat belt stance am i going to be okay if i get in a car accident with no seat belt on and die am is that going to be like funny to me you know what i mean or is that going to be embarrassing i'm not clear on his sense of humor because i haven't downloaded enough of his his i haven't listened to enough of his content like i know i think there's a lot of crossover because i know you're a bill mar enjoyer i know a lot of people where it's like i mar is for my my politics and and bill is for my sports i mean mar is not i'm you don't need no sports mar is not for my politics mar is mar is basically because there's no shows like that to watch.

57:47Do you know what I mean? Like that's really, I just like Mars for

57:49Jason Stewart:Sunday night before I go to work on Monday. I want to laugh at a guy making fun of everyone. I just, I really like the format of the show. That's really, I really like that he sits down, he does a monologue. He sits down with someone for five minutes, then he goes to the panel, you know, and it's, and it's whatever. And then he finishes with his little stuff that he thinks is funny. I just really like the way it's set up. I don't, he's kind of a dumb ass of course, But if it were, I mean, it's worked for 20 years. Yeah. And people talk about all the time in the biz that having a structure and having people know what just happened and what's going to happen next.

58:25Jason Stewart:That's almost enough sometimes to be a success. Like the quality of what's happening in each segment. It doesn't need to be great all the time as long as we know that new rules is coming up next. And then after we talked to Jed Bush, then we get to do a panel with this person from the Atlantic or him going toe to toe with David Sedaris and a comb skirt. That was, that was, that was like, that was good television. That's five minutes that I don't want back. You know, I enjoyed that myself. You're wearing his fucking combe de garçon skirt, man. At some point, David, I mean, I, you know, David, he's goaded, you know, come on the pod whenever, but we're going to clown your look, bro.

59:03He wants to come on the pod, but he only does, he doesn't do anything remote. he will only do things IRL, which I really respect, actually.

59:09Jason Stewart:Well, we'll come out to the fucking, the Shire. Pick up a stick. I'll meet you at the Shire at 2.30. Bring your Zoom recorder. I made a Jon Hamm reference earlier, but congrats to Jon, pregnant at 55. Well, I mean, he's not pregnant. Well, look, if I can call a woman handsome, I can say a guy's pregnant, right? That's true. That's true. Woke ass. Half of that is his. That's true. No, that's a thing. People say we're pregnant and including the male. I know, and it's annoying. But do you think he... What's worse, my partner or I'm pregnant? I mean, that's tough. Those are both stupid. Do you think that this is ham-like?

59:50Jason Stewart:What would you do if you were hanging out at the fucking... If somebody... If a guy came up to you and was like, I'm pregnant, what would you do? I don't know. Would you be just taken aback? Would you laugh? I think I'd be so taken aback. I would just continue the conversation and not acknowledge it as best I could. Chortle. No congratulations. No good for you. Just kind of, oh man, is that a, oh cool. Is that a Sprite? I don't really like Sprite. You know, like just, just kind of. Absorb and deflect, move on quickly. Absorb and move on. That's the best case scenario. Because, because even, I feel like the partner thing, if I say, if somebody says it and I'm like, come on, bro, they will usually be like, I know.

1:00:30They don't like it either. They've just conditioned themselves to say it. no one likes that I really don't think anyone likes saying that I think people say it because they feel like they have to depending on the setting especially if it's in a professional setting

1:00:44Jason Stewart:I like having another arrow in my quiver because I can say my partner, my wife, my chick, my spouse I've got 12 different I've come up with a new happy wife happy life if you want to take it for a spin okay drum roll please happy bitch happy sitch and what do you think that's the most gym class heroes fucking colloquialism i've ever heard in my life do not bring do not bring up my boy travi do not no we ain't my boy travi ain't catching his stray because i came up with something stupid it really it really takes you back to that the last year where you were where a guy could say my bitch and it was everyone yeah sort lets it slide they're not happy about it but they're gonna let it slide i'm not look i'm not even happy about it.

1:01:31I wish I didn't have a brain like this.

1:01:33Jason Stewart:And luckily in 2026, the word bitch is unisex. Wife, not unisex. I'm just saying. This is actually progress. Every day, Jason, we kick the can down the road further and further. If nothing else, we're kicking that damn can down the road. Alright, look. How Long Gone? Thank you guys for joining us. Kicking the can down the road. The Ghanies, September 15th, New York City. Get your tickets. It'll be fun. We're back next week with more podcasts for your head top as usual. Hopefully by the time this comes out it will be fully sold out. So sorry about that. Yeah, hopefully. I reposted the variety on my Twitter so just go give that a like or whatever.

1:02:16Jason Stewart:Yeah, thank you guys so much. Jaw bless and thanks to everyone who sent their congrats. Thanks to Emily for putting it in Feed Me. The list goes on. Love y 'all. Excited to do an award show. Excited to do some monologue writing and reading I love reading we covered that already thank you howlonggone.com we'll see you later bye bye

1:02:59This episode is brought to you by ChatGPT. Hey, it's Bill Simmons from the Bill Simmons Podcast. Have you guys heard about ChatGPT work? It's the new way to use ChatGPT for bigger multi-step projects. And when you need more than just answers, give ChatGPT work access to your apps and files, and it can create real work documents like spreadsheets, slides, and structured reports. Get started at ChatGPT.com by selecting work mode available on Plus and Pro plans.