995. - Chris & Jason

0:01Jason Stewart:I'm not giving up. I am selling the building. The final season of FX is the bear. The restaurant is flooded. Everything's either going to be okay. Or not. We are outgunned and we are outmanned. We have each other. FX is the bear. The final season. All episodes now streaming on Disney+.

0:47how long gone let's fucking rock beautiful monday in new york city we're coming to you from the the nine orchard hotel i'm in jason's lair uh the sun is shining the wind the breeze coming

0:57Jason Stewart:through the open window um we're gonna have some of that nyc sound background sound on today's episode some people pay for that ambient noise but we get it for free move over red scare yeah this one's free bitch this one's free um yeah man look we're gassed if we're being honest and we recorded a podcast yesterday with push the t that we thought was coming out today and then we were told maybe it'd be better if it came out wednesday and i agree with that but we didn't know that going into it but anyway so we're gonna podcast now one-on-one together live raw uncut we're gonna do a raw recording right now of ourselves in a hotel room because of throwing fits fucked us fucked us again uh no but it's it's a great day it's a great day to be in new york the gaunis are tomorrow we just did a little a little quick chat with lauren sherman for fashion people and then we're talking we're talking about a hot story that steven colb the ceo of the cfda got into a little ceo of the roc uh a little a little uh physical violence with some pita protesters at the cost show and people are of course like this is obviously funny but then they're also saying like he assaulted that you know it's not it's not that he wasn't throwing haymakers on these fucking protesters he was he was putting his hands on them which is not the right thing to do well what are you supposed to do pepper spraying you can't pepper spray because then all the the back spray you're gonna get i honestly wonder what i don't know enough legally about what i want to spray pita not lupita i don't know i don't know what you're allowed to do with that i really don't scissor kick i mean i think i mean obviously steven kolb looks like a maniac he looks like the commissioner david stern of the nba if somebody wandered onto the court and was trying to assault lebron james or something like that he was protecting his people he's protecting his people and his investments and he he did he did have a break where he started you know you you can't do that in public the look in his eye he lost his professional cool i will say the look in his eye doesn't match his level of aggression the look in his eye is you're dead the aggression was like stop you know so it's but it's i mean the hand over mouth that feels like something maybe it was like he scarred him from childhood or something well what that reminded me of is it was so i was talking about it on the pod a long time ago but when i was i was asking not i wasn't saying but i was asking maybe another a parent of a child when you're on the airplane and your child is just non-stop scream crying the entire flight why is it the worst thing in the world for a parent to not suffocate the child but place a hand over the child's mouth to dampen the sound a little bit?

3:53Also, it's a physical way to shut up with physical. You know what I mean?

3:59Jason Stewart:When telling somebody to stop doesn't work, you sometimes have to tell them with your hands. I'm not saying duff out your child. I'm just saying, give them a physical way to understand this time to shut up. And that's what Kolb was doing. I don't know. You're right, though. Security guard probably would have done something similar. But I just don't. I mean, if you go, if somebody illegally trespasses on private property, a security guard is allowed to ask them to leave. And if they don't, you can use some force to remove them. You know, Kolb isn't, you know, doing a throat punch. He had his piece on him.

4:35I saw it, but he didn't pull out his firearm. He didn't discharge his weapon. He didn't pull out his firearm. He carried, but he didn't conceal. He was wearing a vest probably, but I didn't see any of it. I could see the kind of, you know.

4:48Jason Stewart:So, you know, what is one supposed to do in that situation? You can't, I mean, you either let them, let PETA people scream and ruin your entire show because Koss makes a leather duffel bag or whatever it is. I think that you're supposed to not do that if you're him. I don't think you're not supposed to do that. I think that there's somebody hired to do it, and it ain't you. But if, let's say, so he doesn't have anything to do with costs at all. No, he's just a CEO. But he was behaving and acting with the passion of a man who, he looked like he designed those pieces himself. Well, it's more about money.

5:26You want that brand and that money in New York showing so they don't decamp to Paris.

5:32Jason Stewart:To me, it's a classic if I don't do it, who will situation. PETA comes into a show, everyone, especially in 2026, all you do is get out your phone and start filming. Nobody does jack shit. And if they don't, if there is like one security guard at the front door and it's like upstairs in a building somewhere or whatever. You're right. Maybe there just truly is nobody to control the situation, and he was the security guard that stepped up. What happened when PETA were real? Back in the day, they're throwing red paint on your fur. Now they're coming up with little handmade signs like it's a high school football game.

6:11Come on.

6:12Jason Stewart:It has the energy of a soccer or a basketball flop, like trying to fake an injury. You go, you have a little sign, and you say PETA is good. clothing is bad and then somebody you know touches you with the pinky finger and they fall on the ground and you know just just seeing a grown adult person on the ground flop and scream crying like a baby because this 140 pound man you know has his arm around you and is asking you to stop ruining the show that's true it's just pathetic behavior and this is coming from two people who have been on the front lines of the animal liberation movement that's that i mean that's the yeah i mean the amount of pamphlets that i received in a p.o box to distribute could fill up this room yeah i mean we we can agree with pita uh their intentions but not not so much their their actions in 2026 yeah i just the whole thing is really funny because everybody kind of looks bad but of course because there's you know assault involved people are really on their high horse you know using extremely specific terms to refer to this so do you i don't want to spoil what you said on fashion people but do you believe this person should three options resign be fired by the board or get a promotion i don't know if there's any hire for him to go that's the thing i think he'll probably be what if what if they announce like fuck he's the new editor of vogue You know what?

7:44This guy is so nasty with it. I feel like he'll be... I feel like it might be one of those, we're going to let you go on your own terms, but you're going to need to go. That's my guess. How much runway are they going to give him on the exit plan? I mean, it should happen end of day today, probably. Oh, wow. EODTD. But I mean, I also like, who cares? It's all like, I don't know. I don't think anyone in the industry is outraged by this. It's more funny. I think that people are outraged are people on the internet that saw, quote, violence, unquote, and are mad about that.

8:15Jason Stewart:Yeah, that ain't no violence, brother. That's just a little funny thing to look at. That's just good old funny stuff to look at. Yeah, so shit. We talked a little bit yesterday when we were interviewing King Push about our day, but I forgot what we talked about already. Oh, I forgot. I'm just so happy to be back. Toronto was great. The weather was so nice. It was really nice. Toronto was wonderful. it was an in and out situation i'm glad i've got my juice vitality and my wellness formula here and i'm gonna i'm gonna rest and recuperate and get fresh get good looking get a little life back in in your body i'm gonna work out later today for the first time and i don't know how long i hit the equinox this morning with the real soldiers you know i was there with the i was out there with the real finance guys this morning i couldn't do it man i mean i shouldn't have i don't feel better you don't feel better fuck no no i mean i'm fine i'm always fine yeah you know it's fine i'm wondering if i'm gonna do a gym sesh or if i'm gonna do a nine orchard gym in the hotel sesh i'm not sure yet this is tight it's not that you're not in a giant room it's just a new york room you know what i mean i know it'll i'll have to move some things around if i do do it but i just always feel bad when i go into the gym and you know smell it cush is my cologne i got my maybe I'll take over the Bluetooth and put on some experimental free jazz or whatever.

9:40Jason Stewart:What's the problem with that? If you're going in the middle of the afternoon... The problem is it's a beautiful, well-appointed gym. But it is an intimate size. So if it's me and Kaya Gerber in there, she's going to be like, fuck, this fucking guy is going to ruin my... My presence in the gym... I'm not saying anything. I'm not trying to talk to people. You bring your own little toys and spread out. I spread out a little bit. You do spread. I'm indecisive about what machines I'm going to use. Because you're making it up as you go. That's the problem. You're freestyling. Sometimes, yeah. Well, if I have my full Rogue kit, if I got all my racks and my barbells and everything, then I'll follow my comprehensive four-point plan.

10:22Jason Stewart:Yeah, when you're in a hotel, you got to kind of... Here, you know, maybe I'll do a little... I've seen you in hotel gyms. You're like a child that can't pick a toy from the box. You're just walking around in circles like, a little bit of this, a little bit of that. But every once in a while, I get locked in, though. I'm not saying, I'm not doubting that. I'm just saying the style, the approach I could see would be annoying for the other. It is a freestyle. He just did five minutes walking backwards on a treadmill. Now his big ass is going to try a Turkish getup, which takes up 30. Yeah, that takes up the whole gym.

10:53Jason Stewart:It takes up the whole fucking gym. Speaking of the gym, we saw a video earlier of someone in the gym, and you specifically said, I think it might be time to take a second look at musician Laufey. Because Laufey obviously makes lullabies, but she put up a video of her getting it in in the gym. She's gerbering, and I don't mean that in the Toronto sense of the word. Jason seemed to like what he saw, is all I'm saying. Look, it was more so a pleasant surprise. Surprise and delight. Lafayette, she has glowed up into a scenario where, you know, like, oh, wow. Sure, I'm sure she sucks as a person, and I'm sure the music sucks.

11:36Jason Stewart:I've never listened to it or heard her talk, but she seems like an annoying person. But, you know, she's getting it in in the gym. She was Gerbering out in the gym. No, I don't even, I have nothing bad to say about her except it's boring, but I will say that something about her just made me believe that she would never wear a matching set. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah. Something about her is like, you don't own a sports bra. I think that's what it is. Yeah, it's like a surprise to see her very fit, doing like hard stuff. Yeah, she's doing little booty busters on the ball with the barbells, but you would expect her to be wearing like a vintage, you know, Suzy and the Banshees t-shirt that she got on Etsy or something like that.

12:14Jason Stewart:I don't know. She strikes me as the kind of girl who would work out in sweatpants. Maybe that, maybe that, but, you know, either way, way to go, Lof. happy for you on your fitness journey we should check it out we should listen to the music i don't know if it's gonna really really gonna happen it's not really for me i just feel like why have i i don't know i know it's not for me but that doesn't stop me from trying stuff all the time something about that in particular yeah to me it just reminds me a lot of like the obama playlist it's a hugely obama playlist like that genre of music of like her and and mitzke and And that kind of thing where even if the music is good, you just get a spidey sense tingle of what the fan base is and looks like.

13:02Jason Stewart:And to me, that is a tough one. There is a whole genre of music that is Obama playlist. The most annoying person on your block is a big fan of that shit. See, here's the thing. That's what's so fascinating about her. I don't know anybody who's a fan. like i've never heard anyone i've only seen it in the press and with brands i've never seen anyone be like yo this is banging you need to listen ever ever and that's what's fascinating yo this banging that's what's so fascinating about it's like no one's ever like yo this is it i think there's a subset of you know 12 to 16 year old girls i wonder if it's that young i wonder if it's that young it's to me at all and it also feels very like aesthetic coded where like the merch has a very like in in this sort of cat ear small girl twee it does sound small like we're well like borrowing a lot of uh the olivia rodrigo kind of things of like yes i made a new song do you guys like it whatever i don't care about that anyway here's the merch drop of my journal kit and it has like a cat thingy and a pillow and to me then it's just kind of like bro don't don't hate on merch bundles okay that's how some of us pay our rent well there i love a merch bundle but the problem is when let me be clear let me be clear i love a merch bundle uh and that you know agnostic of all genders whatever it is but when the merch bundle feels like i don't know like delia's catalog like i know what you mean or i mean and it's not even like a a girly thing or whatever but just like just so entry level i guess selling a branded journal does feel weird even though i don't know if any of them sell a branded journal that's just a i'm sure a guess oh i'm sure somebody does just to make a little you know a little accessories and items where it feels predatorial on their smooth-minded fan base.

15:04The young fan base?

15:04Jason Stewart:Yeah, yeah, yeah. And not smooth-minded because of their lack of studying and class, but just simply their age and ignorance. They haven't grown enough yet. How could they? They're being taken advantage of. Yeah, how could they? And they make their mom buy them the lofty shoelace protector. It's amazing what merch... It's actually kind of crazy how much merch costs. I just feel like I could get away with a 20 spot in my day and leave with at least a record or a t-shirt. Mm-hmm. Oh, yeah. And now we're hitting, I'm looking at$125 for the hoodie. Live Nation, bro. $125 for a hoodie at a show is just, I don't know, something about it feels crazy.

15:40Even though the quality, it's like fine. It's not even that crazy. Like, they're using good stuff. It's not like they're ripping you off. That's just like. Sometimes they are not using real good stuff and are ripping you off. I actually don't. I think most of the big people that are doing the crazy numbers are using pretty good stuff.

15:55Jason Stewart:I don't know how many$120 hoodies are on LA apparel blanks or whatever. I bet like a Travis Scott or Harry Styles, people doing real numbers, I think they're using Comfort Colors or American. I think it's like, the markup is still very good. Of course. Of course. It's like, what's$2? And it feels better. I would like to think that they should have two different tiers for merch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like they should have a mark and a mark by Marc Jacobs. they should have speaking of merch rodeo kids speaking of merch i saw a gentleman equinox today and he was wearing a morgan wallen i'm the problem camo t-shirt okay real tree i'm the problem morgan wallen t getting after it okay but he was black.

16:55And I'm under the impression that that's not cool. Like I'm under the impression that Morgan Wallen is...

17:02Jason Stewart:Morgan Wallen is not invited to the cookout in any way, shape or form. How Long Gone is brought to you by Squarespace. You know what time it is, Jason. It's time to surf the World Wide Web. And when I see websites that work, that look good, that allow me to make transactions. Often, those websites are built on the Squarespace platform. Oh, yeah, that's right, Chris. Let's say you got a little pop-up. I started making picking duck out of my trailer park in Torrance, California, and I want to build that business. We're moving into the next level. It's not so much just like, oh, yeah, here, it's cash, and give me that, and blah, blah, blah, and put it under the...

17:39Jason Stewart:No, no, no, no. We have payment systems. We have payroll systems. We have email services. we're not just doing some things the olden days we can now have business level tools that you know the competition is using just by you inside of your little trailer that's a blessing because we all got to be able to make money and the best way to make money is using a website that you built on squarespace go to squarespace.com slash how long for a free trial and when you're ready to launch use offer code how long to save 10 off your first purchase of a website or a domain squarespace um jason we're often working out we're spending time outdoors we're traveling but also we just want to feel our damn best and what i'm told helps is hydration i need my energy my focus my workouts i need it on on 10 i need to be primed and that's where instant hydration comes in i pour this shit in my water i shake it up i'm ready to fucking rock yeah chris uh we got that nice french gray sea salt in there imported from france of course zero sugar 500 milligrams of sodium we got potassium magnesium aquamin an ocean sourced mineral complex with calcium trace minerals minerals but you know the most important thing if it doesn't taste good we're not going to pour it into our water bottles and drink it after pilates i'm literally drinking it right now i believe it's a little kind of a strawberry lemonade kind of thing and i do like the flavor so you know There's a zillion of these little beautiful vitamin hydration electrolyte packets out there in the world.

19:12Jason Stewart:And this is a great one that I use all the time. Get your sodium. Get potassium. Get your magnesium. Get your Aquaman. Potassium. For a better way to stay hydrated, go to instanthydration.com slash howlong and use my promo code howlong for over 40 % off your first subscription order. It's Instant Hydration's best offer available. That's instanthydration.com slash howlong. Promo code howlong. Jason, I recently went for a full panel with the doc, went through all the shit. And I felt like I know he was doing his best to explain it to me, but I left feeling, and this is not a new feeling for me, I left feeling dumber about my own body.

19:52And I need a fix for that, and I feel like you might have it.

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20:32Morgan Wallen should not be, even if you're like a SEC Southern, like I know, I could tell I've seen this kind of guy before. You know, it's not crazy to me, but I just feel like...

20:45Jason Stewart:Friend of the show, Drewski has parried to this person. I'm like, man, damn, bro. I just don't... Okay, I got a follow-up question and I'm sure a few more to come organically after that scale of one to ten how light skin was he eight eight ten being the lightest yeah okay okay so he was he was wading deep into the light skin water sure but I just crystal clear I just wonder my question with this more is like do you have do you not have a homie that would check you for that i like you know like we have you would check if you're like bro you can't do that i would do that yeah if you come if you come out and we're gonna go to the club like you're not gonna let me wear a screwdriver t-shirt to the to fucking gosh you know what i mean bro put that away i'm not gonna let you wear a screwdriver t-shirt to gosh and you're not gonna let me wear the willy uggs to balthazar for dinner tomorrow and and that's the way friend groups have checked each other for so long so you know what i'm thinking his circle is is small in a bad way yeah yeah the circle is small because he doesn't have a whole lot of friends or family but what i'm deducing here is he you know when you see like oh i'm a little into anime and you maybe you'll have a little keychain or maybe a little sticker in your car and then you see some people who are so into anime whether or not they want to control it they have the haircut they have a backpack they have you know it is they're a walking billboard for it their their love for it is so deep you cannot control it and this person's love of snow bunnery is so strong and so it's basically like he's going fishing for becky yeah and everyone else out here we're on our fly fishing rigs that we'd hand tied ourselves barbless hooks catch and release and he's saying i got a ar-15 and i look for a fish and i shoot it dead that's how but that's how bad i need this fish if that is actually why i respect it that if that's if that's why i respect it if you like the music and can see past him being racist on camera that's different right because as much as i should like morgan or maybe it's like a it's a reverse reparation also also an option i i just i i was just sort of like wow it's crossed to bear i was literally like wow i've never seen this before you know and then of course later i saw a white nerd wearing a j cole it's like okay shit i guess this is just how it works now people just doing whatever i guess well what this is is the the footsteps of equality continue to march forward to our our singularity where one day i would never be one and i'm not taste shaming i think you should listen whatever music you want to i'm just more surprised by people that don't have someone in their network this is gonna be like you know what he said you know what ben shelton at the gym today said he said i didn't have some help i could have used some help when i looked at myself in the mirror today and walked out the door i don't something about it really just i'm You know what?

24:02Jason Stewart:I'm an African-American man in America, and I'm going to wear a T-shirt that I bought of a guy who got kind of famous for yelling the N-word at somebody and trying to throw a chair at him off of a roof. It's just like, and I know nothing matters, and nobody cares about anything, and we move past it quick. I'm fine with all that. I am more concerned with the fact that you don't have the homie that would at least ask you, at least make you think about it before you do it. Well, let's flip it. Let's flip the racial coin. Is this similar to a Kanye West situation? In what sense? In that you have somebody who has been sort of canceled for saying offensive things and hurting some large groups of people.

24:52Jason Stewart:And then some people are holding strong and being like... Here's the thing. Here's the thing. I see where you're going. both Morgan Wallen and Kanye West fans idiots that's the thing it's very different musically obviously but it's a very similar like brain dead fan base and I think that is why you can sort of just do whatever and no one cares and the world at large is kind of like yeah no I'm good I agree with that but I would say there's a sect of people out there many that we know who are categorically proven to be intelligent people but happen to have that dumbass strain in their brain that chooses to look the other way based on Morgan Wallen's behaviors or Kanye's behaviors or Armie Hammer's behaviors.

25:47Kanye West is a little different because he's given us the great American rap song. Morgan doesn't have as many smash singles. Morgan has a lot of smash singles and insane Billboard records, but it's not like we were listening to gold digger in the club right you know it's like do run away no he did not do right he doesn't have like generate at least in my and i've morgan wallen in theory i should like and i've tried and it's not for me yeah it's very weird i don't like

26:11Jason Stewart:pedal steel it's a little it's too happy dad it's very happy like zach brian i i feel like he's actually suffering like i think he's actually a damaged freak and when the songs are good they're really good it's also similar to our comparison with lafayette where i'm i let the fan base dictate my opinion on the author i mean on the on the creator i just i i was i don't yeah i but the kanye thing is i mean it's crazy man it keeps coming up and it seems like it's going to just continue to work i think the key is no new music no new music no talking you just get on that big ass globe with your homies you do your thing 70 000 people show up you go home no nothing else do you think that it's like a work release program from jail like you do this and that's all you can do that that brings me to the to the question do you think that this was this uh rehabilitation tour plan was orchestrated and strategized by professionals somewhere at an agency or is this all off the dome of Kanye?

27:15Jason Stewart:Or does he have a very important sit-down with Rick Rubin to figure out what to do and how to behave? I think he owed promoters money. No, I know. But in terms of, like you said, he goes up there, he only does the hits, he doesn't talk, he's not going to say any weird Chris Brown shit on the mic and have people looking sideways. I think the show is the same as it all. I think that's what his show's always been. It's not like he's trying to be funny in between songs. He's not Julian Casablanca trying to get five off. I think at one point he was. Probably. I think it's been a long. I think once the show's got really crazy and we're spending a fortune on production, if I talk, I ruin it.

27:54Jason Stewart:He ain't Audrey Hobarting up there. No, he's not having fun with it. He didn't bring the mini tramp. He didn't bring the mini tramp. But I do think that it's just going to continue because it's clear that nobody cares. At least a large swath of ticket-buying public does not care. yeah i think it is so tough nowadays just living in the world so much going on we talked about this where it's like dude if i'm a so much conflict so many conflict zones under attack under fire and we need our content so badly that we are willing to you know like even even tv shows like you watch episode old episodes of the office or whatever like there's racism there's homophobia they're saying some wild shit back then and that is sort of America's you know salve the udder that we suck from every night just so we can go to sleep without nightmares again you know I mean I and the same thing with Kanye West it brings us joy and it sucks that he was a bad person who said a lot of bad stuff there's just too many hits there's just too many hits this this is I've been saying this for years if you got hits nobody cares I've been saying for years this is the ultimate example Kim Kardashian's mom you know she probably is one of the the most unsufferable bitches in the world, but she's got so many hits.

29:09Jason Stewart:Chloe, Courtney. No, Chris is the one, bro. You're wrong. Chris is that. You think she's cool with it? If I want to build with anyone in that family, in a platonic way, of course, of course. It's Chris. You're not trying to fold Chris? I'm not trying to fold Chris. I'm not trying to fold Chris. I do think, though, that. You're not a Chris cracker? I do think that someone has cracked Chris. Someone has cracked Chris that has also cracked one of the sisters. Do you think that's... This feels like a Chris Lee's TV show title. Like the Chris Rock show. What was that called? I don't know. Everybody loves Chris.

29:57Jason Stewart:Hanging with Mr. Cooper. Who's cracked Chris? They're all in the same kind of songbook. I'm saying, bro, there is somebody out there. I mean, there's been a lot of people who have cracked Chris over the years. No, I'm saying a rapper that has cracked Kim, Kourtney, Khloe, Kendall, or Kylie. And also... But not rapper from the 80s. Not like an LL Cool J. You're talking about... Not Netspan, but somewhere... Like future may have hit. I think Drake or The Game. Drake or The Game. Who's more likely to fuck Chris, to crack Chris for the story? Drake. Yeah. But the game... Because the game, his circle isn't goofy enough.

30:38Jason Stewart:No, they don't think it's funny. Yeah, his circle would be like, that's actually kind of weird, the game. Hey, the game, don't have sex with that older lady. And then Drake would be like, smell my fingers, Crody. Yeah, that's Chris on the thing. Weird. I slimed it last night, Brody. i i i think it's cool if whoever did it i think it's absolutely whoever cracked chris we think it's cool i think it's cool but i i i just know that it happened and it will eventually we'll hear the story eventually will somebody will share and she what's the name of her current long time boyfriend that's cory gamble that's og big gamble justin bieber's former tour manager do you think gamble is cracking uh do you think somebody do you okay so her they have a post-menopausal agreement that he's allowed to crack off i think they might honestly in this maybe i'm ignorant here they seem like actually in love like i don't think it would go on this long like she doesn't need that like i think cory gamble subscribes to the older the berry sweeter the juice cory's the cory's the out of that world cory who i want to build with the most okay uh move over rob kardashian there's a new number one yeah rob's out tyga out i want i want to be in court me cory and chris getting salads somewhere in beverly hills gotta say rob and tyga is one of the worst duos of people well sometimes you can't pick your eskimo brothers jason you know it just kind of it kind of that's god's plan just a word like I think Rob's low-key dope.