Podcast · 53 episodes
To Be A Boy
by Joeli Brearley and Elliott Rae · English
To Be A Boy dives into the chaos of raising boys today — from dodgy masculinity myths to the wild world of online culture. Joeli Brearley and Elliott Rae mix humour with sharp takes on the policies, systems and social norms shaping boys’ lives. It’s real talk, big laughs, and a nudge toward a fairer future.
Latest episodes
Sadiq Khan: Saving Boys from the ManosphereLondon Mayor Sadiq Khan discusses violence against women and girls, the “manosphere,” and online misogyny targeting boys.8 Sep 2026 · 37 min
The Summer Holiday Survival GuideHow families can thrive during the summer holidays by using play (including outdoor play and adventure playgrounds), lowering expectations, building small daily “anchors” and joy pockets, allowing…21 Jul 2026 · 44 min
Masculinity EducationMasculinity education for young men, focusing on how to create safe spaces to unpack beliefs, resist “talking at” approaches, and use curiosity/critical thinking to challenge harmful or borrowed…14 Jul 2026 · 47 min
All episodes
Sadiq Khan: Saving Boys from the ManosphereLondon Mayor Sadiq Khan discusses violence against women and girls, the “manosphere,” and online misogyny targeting boys.8 Sep 2026 · 37 min · 17 chapters
The Summer Holiday Survival GuideHow families can thrive during the summer holidays by using play (including outdoor play and adventure playgrounds), lowering expectations, building small daily “anchors” and joy pockets, allowing…21 Jul 2026 · 44 min · 12 chapters
Masculinity EducationMasculinity education for young men, focusing on how to create safe spaces to unpack beliefs, resist “talking at” approaches, and use curiosity/critical thinking to challenge harmful or borrowed…14 Jul 2026 · 47 min · 22 chapters
Nothing Is Ever Too Bad: Boys and the Adults Who Don’t Give Up with Professor Seán RedmondYouth justice and how boys/young people get drawn into serious criminal networks in Ireland and the UK; what “light touch” policy should look like; the role of youth clubs, parenting, schools, and…7 Jul 2026 · 51 min · 21 chapters
Raising Boys Without the Tough-Guy Act: Alex Tripper!Raising boys without “tough-guy” authority; replacing control with connection, caregiving, and trust; how mental load, anger, and cultural gender stories shape parenting and boys’ resilience.30 Jun 2026 · 1 h 2 min · 21 chapters
Sent to Stare at the Wall: The Social Media BanThe episode discusses three things: (1) the UK government’s planned social media ban for under-16s, announced by Keir Starmer; (2) a “Flowers for Father’s Day” campaign aimed at breaking down stigma…23 Jun 2026 · 37 min · 11 chapters
Inside the Mind of a 16-Year-Old Boy with Shuab GamoteShuaib Gamote discusses findings from Inside the Mind of a 16-Year-Old and related NEET Commission work, focusing on Gen Z boys’ identity, confidence, social media/AI effects, COVID’s “lost years,”…16 Jun 2026 · 58 min · 28 chapters
Raised by the Internet? A Movember Conversation About BoysA Movember-supported conversation about what it means to be a young man today, focusing on social media, the manosphere, misogyny, dating, body image pressures, friendship, and career/job uncertainty…8 Jun 2026 · 38 min · 20 chapters
Giving Boys a Better Story with Andrew 'Bernie' BernardHow to raise healthier, safer, emotionally connected boys by challenging misogyny, “dominance-based masculinity,” and the manosphere’s online influence on teen relationships and coercive control.2 Jun 2026 · 59 min · 28 chapters
THE John Amaechi on men, masculinity and monsters. (Re-Release)A re-release of To Be A Boy exploring men, masculinity, and “monsters,” linking sport, identity, leadership, and workplace culture to how boys learn (or are denied) intimacy, belonging, and healthy…26 May 2026 · 1 h · 32 chapters
The Black Pill: Inside the Ideology Radicalising Young Men OnlineThe episode explains “black pill” ideology—an incel-derived, nihilistic worldview that claims some young men are “too ugly” or socially unfit to ever attract women or succeed.19 May 2026 · 1 h 7 min · 30 chapters
Live from the Push 4 Paternity Leave March!Live recording of the “Push for Paternity Leave” march in London (with references to Leeds, Manchester, Nottingham) on 2 May, demanding UK parental leave reform: six weeks paid paternity leave at 90%…12 May 2026 · 1 h 7 min · 31 chapters
When Boys Care: The Quiet Superpower of Responsibility with Gavin MorganGrowing Together’s “mentoring in reverse” program for struggling teenage boys (and other vulnerable teens) paired with younger children in nurseries/primary schools.7 May 2026 · 43 min · 24 chapters
Men’s Health Strategy Is Not a Poster in a GP Surgery with Professor Paul GaldasMen’s health strategy in the UK, focusing on why boys and men delay help, how health systems should change (not just individual behavior), and how to reduce loneliness, suicide risk, and premature…28 Apr 2026 · 58 min · 30 chapters
The Box We Put Men InHow “man up/boys don’t cry” masculinity scripts create a “muzzle” and narrow “box” that blocks emotional literacy, leading to loneliness and severe mental-health outcomes; what parents and society…21 Apr 2026 · 48 min · 21 chapters
The Manosphere After the Camera StopsThe “manosphere after the camera stops” discusses how manosphere influencers recruit boys online, why it spreads via algorithms, and what parents/schools can do to counter misogyny and harmful…14 Apr 2026 · 41 min · 19 chapters
Kate Dearden: Day-One Dads, Fair Play & What Comes NextMinister Kate Dearden discusses the UK Employment Rights Act changes effective 6 April, including day-one paternity and unpaid parental leave, bereaved partners’ paternity leave, sexual-harassment…6 Apr 2026 · 38 min · 16 chapters
Joe Wicks Counters With Some Positive Masculinity...Joe Wicks discusses positive masculinity through fitness, mental health, fatherhood, role models, body image, and homeschooling—plus how social media and “peptide/steroid” culture can fuel body…31 Mar 2026 · 51 min · 22 chapters
Fatherhood Is Not a Side Quest: Dr. Anna Machin on Raising Boys & Saving SocietyIn this episode of *To Be A Boy*, hosts Joeli Brearley and Elliott Rae welcome Dr. Anna Machin, an evolutionary anthropologist, to discuss the complexities of fatherhood.24 Mar 2026 · 54 min · 22 chapters
Under 16s vs Social Media: Kanishka Narayan MP, Online Safety Minister Enters the ChatJoeli Brearley and Elliott Rae17 Mar 2026 · 44 min · 20 chapters
Social Media Showdown: Should Teens Log Off for Good?Joeli Brearley and Elliott Rae10 Mar 2026 · 51 min · 21 chapters
REPLAY: Josh Sargent on Social Media Bans and Online MasculinityIn this episode of the "To Be A Boy" podcast, hosts Joeli Brearley and Elliott Rae revisit their conversation with 15-year-old Josh Sargent, an insightful young author and commentator on online…3 Mar 2026 · 53 min · 20 chapters
From Gang Life to Gentle Fatherhood: Fredi Nwaka & a Varied Modern ManhoodIn this powerful and humorous episode, filmmaker, author, and former rapper Fredi Nwaka shares his journey from the complexities of gang life to embracing gentle fatherhood.24 Feb 2026 · 54 min · 23 chapters
Frontline Boys: What Teachers Really See In The ClassroomIn this episode, hosts Joeli Brearley and Elliott Rae engage with two experienced secondary school teachers, Will from Newcastle and Machel from London, to discuss the realities faced by boys in…16 Feb 2026 · 59 min · 21 chapters